Disclaimer: I don't own these poems, I don't think anyone actually knows who does... so anyway please don't sue me, I'm sort of low on funds at the moment...
Authors Note: Please read!
First, this is just here temporarily, just until I can get my butt in gear and actually put this in to story form, but I am both incredibility busy and lazy, so it could take a while, plus, a lot of people wanna hear the full version, and I'm horrible at answering e-mails, so... yeah.
Also, the poem in the first part of my story is the one I learned when I was only about 8 or 9. But I remembered hearing another part to it so about a year ago I was looking on the internet for it and I found 'Combined version of Tangle Talk'. And then about a month ago, I found another version. There's a bunch of these out there...
1. Combined version of Tangle Talk
The famous speaker who no one had heard of said:
Ladies and jelly spoons, hobos and tramps,
cross-eyed mosquitoes and bow-legged ants,
I stand before you to sit behind you
to tell you something I know nothing about.
Next Thursday, which is Good Friday,
there's a Mother's Day meeting for fathers only;
wear your best clothes if you haven't any.
Please come if you can't; if you can, stay at home.
Admission is free, pay at the door;
pull up a chair and sit on the floor.
It makes no difference where you sit,
the man in the gallery's sure to spit.
The show is over, but before you go,
let me tell you a story I don't really know.
One bright day in the middle of the night,
two dead boys got up to fight.
(The blind man went to see fair play;
the mute man went to shout "hooray!")
Back to back they faced each other,
drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
and came and killed the two dead boys.
A paralyzed donkey passing by
kicked the blind man in the eye;
knocked him through a nine-inch wall,
into a dry ditch and drowned them all.
If you don't believe this lie is true,
ask the blind man; he saw it too,
through a knothole in a wooden brick wall.
And the man with no legs walked away.
* * *
This one looks a bit complicated, but I'm sure you're all smart people and will figure it out...
Part 1.
One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead *boy's got up to fight (*men)
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other
Part 2a.
One was blind and the other couldn't see
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"
[or: And two lame men came to carry them away]
Part 2b.
A paralyzed donkey passing by
Kicked the blind man in the eye
Knocked him through a nine inch wall
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all
Part 2c.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
And came to arrest the two dead boys
If you don't believe this story's true,
Ask the blind man he saw it too!
Hope you liked them! :)
Authors Note: Please read!
First, this is just here temporarily, just until I can get my butt in gear and actually put this in to story form, but I am both incredibility busy and lazy, so it could take a while, plus, a lot of people wanna hear the full version, and I'm horrible at answering e-mails, so... yeah.
Also, the poem in the first part of my story is the one I learned when I was only about 8 or 9. But I remembered hearing another part to it so about a year ago I was looking on the internet for it and I found 'Combined version of Tangle Talk'. And then about a month ago, I found another version. There's a bunch of these out there...
1. Combined version of Tangle Talk
The famous speaker who no one had heard of said:
Ladies and jelly spoons, hobos and tramps,
cross-eyed mosquitoes and bow-legged ants,
I stand before you to sit behind you
to tell you something I know nothing about.
Next Thursday, which is Good Friday,
there's a Mother's Day meeting for fathers only;
wear your best clothes if you haven't any.
Please come if you can't; if you can, stay at home.
Admission is free, pay at the door;
pull up a chair and sit on the floor.
It makes no difference where you sit,
the man in the gallery's sure to spit.
The show is over, but before you go,
let me tell you a story I don't really know.
One bright day in the middle of the night,
two dead boys got up to fight.
(The blind man went to see fair play;
the mute man went to shout "hooray!")
Back to back they faced each other,
drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
and came and killed the two dead boys.
A paralyzed donkey passing by
kicked the blind man in the eye;
knocked him through a nine-inch wall,
into a dry ditch and drowned them all.
If you don't believe this lie is true,
ask the blind man; he saw it too,
through a knothole in a wooden brick wall.
And the man with no legs walked away.
* * *
This one looks a bit complicated, but I'm sure you're all smart people and will figure it out...
Part 1.
One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead *boy's got up to fight (*men)
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other
Part 2a.
One was blind and the other couldn't see
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"
[or: And two lame men came to carry them away]
Part 2b.
A paralyzed donkey passing by
Kicked the blind man in the eye
Knocked him through a nine inch wall
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all
Part 2c.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
And came to arrest the two dead boys
If you don't believe this story's true,
Ask the blind man he saw it too!
Hope you liked them! :)