Okay, here's chapter two. Hopefully we're still not botching the characters…too much.
Oh, and be careful in your reviews. If you point out errors, you may find yourself with an email asking you to help us…it has happened. ~evil grins~
More of authors' notes at the bottom, but until then, we don't own these characters.
Erie and Spider
The hobbits marched in front of the rest of the group, singing bawdy songs at the top of their lungs. Lingering near the back of the group, the elves lifted their melodious voices in hymns to the beauty around them, trying to block out the hobbits' singing. Men and dwarves in the middle alternated between wincing and covering their ears. Normally, elven song would be pleasant to hear, but when it was mixed with the songs of hobbits, it created an unseemly ruckus.
The group was nearing the edge of the forest when Gimli tripped over a root and landed face first in a pile of leaves…and papers. Sputtering slightly, the dwarf pulled papers out of his beard and pockets. One of his axes was embedded in a piece of paper. With a smile, Legolas pulled the papers off of him and smoothed them out.
"Interesting. More letters to us."
Galadriel rested her hand on Legolas' shoulder, peering at the papers. "Truly? What a coincidence!"
The hobbits grinned at each other, their singing long forgotten. The elves finished their song soon after, and quiet descended upon the group.
"Well?" Merry had gotten impatient. Legolas looked at him quizzically. With a sigh, Merry pulled the notes from Legolas' hands. "Fine then. I'll read them."
"We should keep moving…"
"All right, Aragorn, I'll read them and walk at the same time. Can't be too hard."
After the group started marching again, Merry cleared his throat.
"Ahem! The first question of the day goes to…Pippin and me! When Boromir was getting arrows stuck in him like a pincushion, why did you wait until he was almost dead to charge out and help?"
Pippin grinned, "Because we didn't want to be eaten, and besides, we had to pause for dramatic effect in the movie."
Merry nodded and continued. "But seriously, it was because we were in shock. Even though Boromir was portrayed as a bad guy, he wasn't really, and he did try to save us. We couldn't believe he would get shot at. The next question is for Galadriel and Celeborn. Are you upset that Lothlorien is dying? Or are you happy you finally get to pass into the undying lands?"
Galadriel and Celeborn looked at each other for a long time, obviously conversing mentally. Celeborn finally nodded and smiled, answering for both of them. "While our hearts ache to watch our beloved Lothlorien fade away, we are happy to finally be coming to a close on our life. When our task here is done, Galadriel will pass into the undying lands. I will remain to tie up loose ends, but will eventually join her. Middle-earth no longer needs our protection, we may sail west with no worries or regrets."
The other elves all smiled warmly at the couple, pleased that two of the oldest and most powerful of their kind would obtain peace. Many of the women in the group also had sappy smiles, until Pippin grew bored. He snatched the letters from Merry and read the next question. "Legolas. What type of bird feathers do you use to flight your arrows?"
Legolas pulled an arrow from his quiver and examined it. "Well, I guess I usually use goose feathers, but when they're scarce, wood grouse works just as well. This arrow uses goose feathers."
"That's always good to know. Aragorn, why is your ranger name Strider? I like the name, but out of curiosity, why didn't you choose a different name?"
Aragorn paused for a moment, thinking, before he answered, "Well, even though it is my name, I am not the one who chose it. The people of Bree gave it to me, because they noticed that when I walk, I take long strides . . . though I am still confused as to why they would notice my walking patterns."
Pippin sniggered. "Probably 'cause you walk funny compared to hobbits."
Aragorn glared at the hobbit. "Gee . . .thanks."
Pippin grinned back. "You're welcome. Arwen, the next question's for you. What, specifically as possible, do you see in a man so much younger than you? Name, rank, and Numenorean serial number aside, what about Elessar made you forsake your family and the possibility of the West?"
"Hmm, this is a bit difficult. I know the answer, but how to voice it . . . By younger this question really means mortal, yes?" Arwen stared into space, deep in thought.
"Do continue, I want to know too." Aragorn, rested his hand on her shoulder. "Arwen?"
Arwen blinked, looking at him. She smiled. "Of course, you would think my answer is love, but it isn't. What I see in him is immortality."
"What do you mean, love?" Galadriel asked.
"Well, the time of my people is over, and so they pass on into the West. I could go with them, yes, and remain my ageless, timeless self. Or I could remain, and attempt to realize what I see in him and his people. That the life I have as a mortal will grow as any creature that truly lives, and will give me an immortality more enduring than any I would have over the seas because it will evolve and take new shape after we have gone. So you see, by remaining for love I am not choosing death, but life."
Aragorn hugged Arwen. "I love you more and more, every day, you know that, right?"
Arwen smiled back. "Of course I do. I could never forget that."
Pippin hugged them both. "I love all of you! Now, Aragorn, I believe it was you who said we needed to keep marching on. Don't stop for mushy gushy stuff now!"
With a laugh, the party continued to move forward. Pippin looked down to read the next question, but found it wasn't there. Frodo was now sorting through the papers. "Okay, the next question is for Legolas, Boromir, Gimli, and Aragorn. How is it that essentially four people go up against an entire army, with a single casualty? I understand that you are all wonderful warriors, blah blah blah, but come on. Even the best fighter in the history of the universe can be beaten if there are too many."
Many "Yes, I want to know too," and, "How did you do that?" were voiced. With a sigh, Legolas answered first. "I am a great warrior and move fast. Since I am an elf, I know that being hurt in battle will more then likely prove to be fatal if it is serious, so I know how to move to prevent that sort of thing. Even if I don't kill the enemy, I know not to get hurt."
"I died, remember?" was Boromir's contribution.
"Orcs are tall and I am short. So, all in all, I will see them before they will see me if we are in battle. Size matters in war." Gimli grinned, brandishing his axes as dwarves and hobbits patted him on the back.
"Size comes in handy other times too . . ." Gandalf muttered under his breath, a playful smile on his face.
"Well, the Uruk-hai were a bit distracted. They were trying to find the Halflings, so they could bring them back unharmed. That caused them to be a bit sloppier in their fighting..."
"If that was possible," sniggered Legolas, interrupting Aragorn. The ranger continued, unphased. "…therefore giving them a bit of a disadvantage. We also had the advantage of sheer determination on our side. We would defend the ring, no matter what the consequences would be. We would not let anything short of death deter us. If you recall, Boromir continually would get up again after having been shot. He would not give up until Mandos himself came for his soul."
Legolas, Boromir, and Gimli slowly nodded, shocked at Aragorn's little speech. "Yeah, what he said."
"Oh, and Legolas, will you marry me?"
Legolas blinked at the hobbit. "Sorry Frodo, you're not my type…"
"What? Oh, no, that's what the person who wrote the question, Dragonlet, asked."
Legolas looked a bit sad. "I had a lover once, he sailed West."
Pippin tilted his head to the side. "Didn't you tell us that earlier?" He shrugged. "Oh well, this'll cheer you up!" He snatched the notes from Frodo and read "Just for the record, Boromir, you're an a$$hole."
The hobbits, orcs, and dwarves burst out laughing. The elves snickered softly behind their hands, and the men didn't know if they should laugh or be offended. Boromir didn't look ruffled at all. "If that is your opinion, very well. It's a valid opinion. Although I disagree, I won't object forcibly…" He held up his sword, with an evil smirk on his face.
"Don't worry. The worst he'll do is put spiders in your bed. Does that to me every time I call him one." Faramir tried to console the mysterious Dragonlet, whoever she was.
Sam snuck up behind Pippin and waved an apple in the younger hobbit's face. Pippin grabbed the apple, and Sam snatched the notes, returning them to Frodo.
"Thank you, Sam! This next question is for Erestor, Lindir, Galdor, etc. How does it feel being underappreciated? You guys are known as just 'the council of Elrond,' how do you think of it?"
"Meh," scoffed Erestor, "Well, Figwit got famous, and now look at him. Fangirls drooling over him, ruining his fine clothing. Same with Legolas. Truthfully, we're quite content with being known simply as 'the council of Elrond.' Enough fame and glory to bring a smile to our face, but not enough to make the girls go crazy over us. Just the right balance. Besides, we got to keep the clothes."
"Next question for Aragorn. Do you enjoy being king, or would you rather be a ranger again? And if Boromir was still alive (in the books and movie) would you still give Faramir the princedom of Ithilien as he was the Captain there?"
Aragorn rubbed his beard and spoke, "Even though I love to be King, I wish sometimes that I was still a ranger. I miss all the adventure and danger. The traveling to far off lands, meeting new people, scaring some hobbits…" he paused for dramatic effect before continuing. "As for Faramir's princedom, it comes down to whether Faramir would have fallen if Boromir had been alive as well. In terms of military skill, the brothers were more or less equals in my opinion, and Boromir may well have suffered his brother's wound on the fields. In that case, Denethor's madness would not have been so strong, and he may well have died without the athelas administered by my hands. I doubt, were one of those brothers still living, I would have been able to forsake the battlegrounds in favor of healing the other. So either way, Faramir would have had the princedom bestowed upon him." Another moment of thought. "Besides, Boromir would have tried to kill me."
Boromir hastily sheathed his sword. Faramir glanced over at him, frowning slightly, before shrugging. "Frodo? What's the next question?"
"Next question's for Legolas. How does it feel when a bunch of people think that you and a lot of other elves are obsessed with hair?"
"Honestly, it bothers me, even though we do like to stay clean, we are not as prissy as some seem to think." Aragorn snorted. Legolas chose to ignore him. "There are other qualities besides hair…there are teeth, noses, and eyes." He laughed, "Just kidding, there are more to elves then pedicures and nice hair."
"Like pale skin," grinned Gimli.
Legolas growled at the dwarf. "Seriously, elves aren't really into physical beauty. We're born beautiful, we don't need to spend millennia making ourselves prettier. We prefer to dedicate ourselves to the arts."
Frodo grinned. "And fighting is an art?"
"Of course."
"Okay. The next question's for Voronwe. "Why was it, that when Tuor came to you, wearing Turgon's old armor, you immediately assumed he must be sent by Ulmo? Couldn't he have been an impersonator looking for the way to Gondolin in order to destroy it? Weren't you even a little suspicious?"
Voronwe had been silent for most of the time. He now spoke. "…You know, I should have been a bit suspicious, but…well, destined are destined and this man was."
"Okay, nice answer. Glorfindel, did, the Balrog you fought have wings or didn't he?"
"I'm sorry. I was too busy concentrating on fighting it, I didn't even notice if it had wings or not. All I saw was a beast of shadow and flame, one that was very mad, and one that was attacking me. I didn't look at its back to check for wings."
"You get the next question too, Glor. What was it like, being reborn? And why did you go *back* to Middle-earth rather then stay in Aman?"
"I was reborn? (1) I thought I was just named after that guy…cool!"
Pippin stole the letters back from Frodo. He read the next question, a mischievous grin spreading over his face. "Oh Elladan and Elrohir, you get the next question!" The twins gulped in unison as Pippin continued. "What do you think about all the twincest fics involving you two?"
"Twincest!?!" Elladan shouted, his mouth dropping open in shock. Elrohir just smiled smugly, keeping his mouth shut.
The others sniggered at their reactions. Elrond wasn't sure if he should be worried or not, but then again, his sons were adults now. He couldn't continue to brood over them like a mother hen. Pippin asked the next question, thankfully sparing the twins any further embarrassment. "Aragorn, don't you feel bad that Arwen's giving up her immortality for you?"
Aragorn nodded, "Yes, I do feel bad for her, but we loved each other so much, that when I was to pass, she would have died from grief anyway. By making herself mortal, not only did she prove a point that love is stronger then life itself, but that she was also willing to give up whatever she had to, to unite the elves and men."
"Legolas, this person, Celine, wants to know why you won't seek a woman you love where you live."
"Well, I do find women attractive, but with the situation that I am in, I shall not be returning home anytime soon, so that would prove to be unfair to both her and me. As you see, I travel with mostly men, and love is love, no matter what gender you are."
"Very well put, Mister Legolas!" grinned Sam. Frodo smacked him lightly on the head as Pippin went back to reading.
"Saruman, Celine thinks you are very stupid, no wonder that Gandalf is now the white. I'm sorry, but I had to say that to you. Normally I'm not so harsh on people."
Saruman just huffed, with a small pout on his face.
"Elrond, are you not sometimes ashamed for your human emotions? I think that it is a good thing that you have some human in you, you can understand us better than other elves."
Elrond closed his eyes, recalling memories that now brought a smile to his face. "I think it is well that I am in touch with my human emotions, it is nothing to be ashamed of. I have learned, however, that you do not cry at a council meeting. People will give you strange looks. I learned that quickly, after even Elros looked at me strangely."
Gandalf chuckled, remembering well the council Elrond was talking about. He slid the papers from Pippin's grip and took over reading himself. "Gimli, where did you get your axe? It gets smashed and 5 minutes later, 'And my axe.'"
Gimli grinned. "I knew someone would ask this! I'm assuming you are talking about the movie. If you were paying close attention, you would see it is not my axe that I smash, but that of the elderly dwarf sitting next to me. I disliked the idea of chipping mine on something as trivial as a ring."
"Smart dwarf, now to Legolas and Aragorn. Did you know each other before the Fellowship? It really seemed like it. You knew each other's names and all."
Legolas smiled at Aragorn, who nodded for him to go on "Yes, we knew each other. How?" The elf smirked. "We met before."
"Nice diplomatic answer. Polite, but vague. Shall we continue?" Gandalf shuffled the papers again. "Frodo, why didn't you get up at Weathertop? Were you hurt?"
Frodo blinked a few times… "Um, no, I wasn't hurt. Having a Nazgul blade in my shoulder isn't any cause for worry. I should have stood right back up and gotten back into the fighting, never minding the fact that my shoulder's been infected by a poisonous blade and I nearly die if wasn't for Aragorn and the elves!"
"Was that a bit of sarcasm there Mister Frodo?"
"Of course not, Sam," Frodo replied sarcastically.
"Pip, you get the final question. Are you looking for the Entwives? (HOOM)"
"Well, hoom yourself! Nope, can't say I'm looking for the Entwives. I'm having a hard enough time keeping track of my cousin! Now, where'd Merry run off to?"
Aragorn pointed. "He ran ahead. You might want to go catch up, we're all falling behind schedule. Hurry up now, keep moving! I want us to reach the river by nightfall!"
(1) Glorfindel's rebirth is something there is still a huge debate on. This answer is by no means accurate or inaccurate. It's simply one of the few we just don't know. Same with the Balrog's wings.
Thank you to everyone who liked this. Special thanks to Mith and Aciel Skadi.
Now, we know that interactive fics have been banned from ff.net. This may be the last chapter we post here. However, The Hidden Side will have a new home at Spider's LOTR ezboard, pub73.ezboard.com/btawaruesta
Please come and keep an eye or two on it there. Registration for ezboard is free and easy, if you want to keep reviewing. Spider is Laeghwest there, Erie doesn't have an ezboard account yet. We'll keep The Hidden Side updates at Tawaruesta. Thank you to everyone for contributing to this story!
~Erie and Spider~
Oh, one last thing. Sorry Celine, but your song thingy came after we had already nearly finished this chapter. We'll get it in the next one though, we promise!