Ok...my public! I have returned with yet another chapter of this ridiculous story! I can almost hear some of you vomiting in disgust (Ah...the sound of vomiting and moaning in the darkness...my friends) Any-who...this chapter will take Everyone's Favorite Small Town Idiot from the church to the hospital. I was originally going to have Chapter 2 do that...but...tough luck...get over it. This isn't even real! And now...on with even more Stupidity. Oh yeah- shout out to Vero- you're my muse for this chapter. Viva los Weirdos! Mwahahahaha! (Why'd I laugh like that???) Oh yeah- insert disclaimer here.
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I'm really sick of writing titles, so fill in your own witty title here --------------------------
(But for those who are writing impaired- Not so Silent Hill ~ Dead hookers and Weird Hospitals)
On top of the Altar, a woman was laying with her legs spread. Harry backed away slowly, but woman jumped up and slowly advanced on him. "Your coming was foretold, foretold by Pyromancy." (Note- Pyromancy is a fire thing- not Gyromancy- and ancient fortune telling thing in which idiots got dizzy and stumbles onto letters. Dhalia anyone?) Harry says, "And what, praytell, were you just doing?" The woman shuffles for a moment and says, "I was practicing, practicing for my new part in this movie, I play a stripper." Harry replies, "Oh, OK. Who are you?" The woman replies, "You are the light, and you must stop the encroaching darkness which is sweeping, sweeping over the town." Harry says, "Ok...I don't care...and why do you keep fucking repeating certain words?!" She stops for a moment, glancing around the room, and says "Its supposed to add to the effect of teh game- ya know, it makes me look intelligent...didn't you read the script?" Again, the Booming Voice from Above speaks, "SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THE DAMN SCRIPT, THE IDIOTS WHO ARE PLAYING THIS DON'T KNOW THAT YOU GUYS ARE ACTUALLY A BAD DREAM DREAMT UP BY STEPHEN SPIELBERG!!!"
**********Alternate ending 10**********
The Booming Voice from Above gets so angry that she ends the world and kills Harry similarly to the way killed in Ending 9. No great loss.
Harry looks around the Church, finally popping and pulling out the shotgun. He begins shooting around aimlessly, while the voice laughs maniacally and screams, "You cannot shoot me...I am in Holland! We have a big shield that stops mostly everything! Mwahahahahaha!" Harry says, "Damn you Dutch...Damn you!" Suddenly Harry is knocked unconscious by some unseen force (I wonder who, Vero...3 on the Unconscious count) When he awakens, the mysterious woman is gone (Can someone explain to me why she doesnt tell Harry her name...?)
**********Alternate ending 11**********
Your Author appears again, maddened. He walks up to the crazy person who is impersonating him and writing all of these non funny jokes. The impersonator pulls out a deck of Yu Gi Oh cards and challenges your Author to a duel. He accepts, and, to make a long story short, summons the Dark Magician with 5 equip cards and defeats the impersonator. However, while watching, Harry gets caught in slipping the impersonator some cards. Your Author makes a hole appear below him and sends him to Samael's apartment in Hell. Wanna fuck with me...do ya Harry. Hmmm....I'll show you...
Harry walks up to the Altar. On it, there are many things, including a dildo, a cat and nine tails, a key, and a pyramid looking thingy. He takes the key and dildo and begins to leave. Then, another revelation hits him and he takes the pyramid thing (Why he takes it, I do not know...that damn thing isn't really important to the plot of the game.)
**********Alternate ending 12**********
Your Author, the Idiot, forgot to kill the impersonator guy who is trying to point out holes in the game's real plot. Wanna fuck with me, you damn psychopath, I'll show you...(Oh yeah, Harry shoots himself because he gets so annoyed at Your Author for taking so fucking long to kill this muther fucker.)
Harry walks out of the Church, and began heading down the road, humming "Mary Had a Little Lamb." However, when he least expects it, The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head, appears and tries to kill him with that big ol' knife of his. Since The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head has no eyes, it misses Harry and he takes the chance to kill it (BTW- I haven't played that much SH2, so bear with me on all that. If you're that worried though, just change Harry to James and make all other necessary changes.) As he walks off, Harry hears The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head say, "Take this...it fills in YET ANOTHER hole in the plot." The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head is suddenly thrust into the Alternate world an is eaten by the real Silent Hill monsters, not those tacky doors and dolls in SH2.
**********Alternate ending 13**********
Damn impersonator....babbling on about SH2. Harry sets so mad he fires at the gas tank nearby and kills us all. Of course, I use Priori Incantatem and bring me and Harry back and we continue. (HP...I know)
As he is walking along, he becomes aware of someone following him. When he looks, there is a woman scantily dressed and half her face is missing. She says, "Hey sailor, you wanna have a good time? I know a motel we can go to...its full of drugs and bad movie references.
**********Alternate endings 14**********
Harry is disgusted by the whore. However, he is a bit frisky and...HARRY!!! GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY TYPEWRITER!!! Ahem... Harry shoots the whore because he doesnt want DHIV (Dead Human ImmunoDeficiency...haha)
**********Alternate ending 15********** (Wow...two n a row...cool.)
I kill her because she's like everyone else in this God damned story and fucking up the plot. harry shoots himself because heis denied of sex.
Harry reaches a small building, and beyond that there is a small raisey bridgey thingy. He enter the building, and walks over to the PC there, again, keen on checking his mail. However, I make the PC disapear and a keyhole appear. Harry mutters, "Asshole..." and walks away. The world begins to waver and he is knocked out (4) When he awakes he mutters more obscenities and places the key in the hole. Sound erupts from the console and then all is still. he walks out and crosses the bridge.
As he comes out on the other side, he sees that there is a map pasted on the Very Oddly Similar fence from before. He takes it, and sees that there is a hospital nearby, and since it is circled and underlined on the map, heads there. As he enters the rusted gates, they fall off and he runs away, fearing he might be arrested for defacing public property. (Dumbass)
The lobby is dark, and suddenly, something is heard in the next room. Harry heads towards there, but suddenly
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MWAHAHAHAHAHA- now you have to read on! More to come, and believe me...it isnt gunna be Kaufman with another name in the next room! Please review...they're really cool.
Also...anyone who knows anything about SH3 and 4...e-mail me or include it in the review.
\\DemonKnight//
_____________________________________________________________________________________
I'm really sick of writing titles, so fill in your own witty title here --------------------------
(But for those who are writing impaired- Not so Silent Hill ~ Dead hookers and Weird Hospitals)
On top of the Altar, a woman was laying with her legs spread. Harry backed away slowly, but woman jumped up and slowly advanced on him. "Your coming was foretold, foretold by Pyromancy." (Note- Pyromancy is a fire thing- not Gyromancy- and ancient fortune telling thing in which idiots got dizzy and stumbles onto letters. Dhalia anyone?) Harry says, "And what, praytell, were you just doing?" The woman shuffles for a moment and says, "I was practicing, practicing for my new part in this movie, I play a stripper." Harry replies, "Oh, OK. Who are you?" The woman replies, "You are the light, and you must stop the encroaching darkness which is sweeping, sweeping over the town." Harry says, "Ok...I don't care...and why do you keep fucking repeating certain words?!" She stops for a moment, glancing around the room, and says "Its supposed to add to the effect of teh game- ya know, it makes me look intelligent...didn't you read the script?" Again, the Booming Voice from Above speaks, "SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THE DAMN SCRIPT, THE IDIOTS WHO ARE PLAYING THIS DON'T KNOW THAT YOU GUYS ARE ACTUALLY A BAD DREAM DREAMT UP BY STEPHEN SPIELBERG!!!"
**********Alternate ending 10**********
The Booming Voice from Above gets so angry that she ends the world and kills Harry similarly to the way killed in Ending 9. No great loss.
Harry looks around the Church, finally popping and pulling out the shotgun. He begins shooting around aimlessly, while the voice laughs maniacally and screams, "You cannot shoot me...I am in Holland! We have a big shield that stops mostly everything! Mwahahahahaha!" Harry says, "Damn you Dutch...Damn you!" Suddenly Harry is knocked unconscious by some unseen force (I wonder who, Vero...3 on the Unconscious count) When he awakens, the mysterious woman is gone (Can someone explain to me why she doesnt tell Harry her name...?)
**********Alternate ending 11**********
Your Author appears again, maddened. He walks up to the crazy person who is impersonating him and writing all of these non funny jokes. The impersonator pulls out a deck of Yu Gi Oh cards and challenges your Author to a duel. He accepts, and, to make a long story short, summons the Dark Magician with 5 equip cards and defeats the impersonator. However, while watching, Harry gets caught in slipping the impersonator some cards. Your Author makes a hole appear below him and sends him to Samael's apartment in Hell. Wanna fuck with me...do ya Harry. Hmmm....I'll show you...
Harry walks up to the Altar. On it, there are many things, including a dildo, a cat and nine tails, a key, and a pyramid looking thingy. He takes the key and dildo and begins to leave. Then, another revelation hits him and he takes the pyramid thing (Why he takes it, I do not know...that damn thing isn't really important to the plot of the game.)
**********Alternate ending 12**********
Your Author, the Idiot, forgot to kill the impersonator guy who is trying to point out holes in the game's real plot. Wanna fuck with me, you damn psychopath, I'll show you...(Oh yeah, Harry shoots himself because he gets so annoyed at Your Author for taking so fucking long to kill this muther fucker.)
Harry walks out of the Church, and began heading down the road, humming "Mary Had a Little Lamb." However, when he least expects it, The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head, appears and tries to kill him with that big ol' knife of his. Since The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head has no eyes, it misses Harry and he takes the chance to kill it (BTW- I haven't played that much SH2, so bear with me on all that. If you're that worried though, just change Harry to James and make all other necessary changes.) As he walks off, Harry hears The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head say, "Take this...it fills in YET ANOTHER hole in the plot." The Thing, formerly known as Pyramid Head is suddenly thrust into the Alternate world an is eaten by the real Silent Hill monsters, not those tacky doors and dolls in SH2.
**********Alternate ending 13**********
Damn impersonator....babbling on about SH2. Harry sets so mad he fires at the gas tank nearby and kills us all. Of course, I use Priori Incantatem and bring me and Harry back and we continue. (HP...I know)
As he is walking along, he becomes aware of someone following him. When he looks, there is a woman scantily dressed and half her face is missing. She says, "Hey sailor, you wanna have a good time? I know a motel we can go to...its full of drugs and bad movie references.
**********Alternate endings 14**********
Harry is disgusted by the whore. However, he is a bit frisky and...HARRY!!! GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY TYPEWRITER!!! Ahem... Harry shoots the whore because he doesnt want DHIV (Dead Human ImmunoDeficiency...haha)
**********Alternate ending 15********** (Wow...two n a row...cool.)
I kill her because she's like everyone else in this God damned story and fucking up the plot. harry shoots himself because heis denied of sex.
Harry reaches a small building, and beyond that there is a small raisey bridgey thingy. He enter the building, and walks over to the PC there, again, keen on checking his mail. However, I make the PC disapear and a keyhole appear. Harry mutters, "Asshole..." and walks away. The world begins to waver and he is knocked out (4) When he awakes he mutters more obscenities and places the key in the hole. Sound erupts from the console and then all is still. he walks out and crosses the bridge.
As he comes out on the other side, he sees that there is a map pasted on the Very Oddly Similar fence from before. He takes it, and sees that there is a hospital nearby, and since it is circled and underlined on the map, heads there. As he enters the rusted gates, they fall off and he runs away, fearing he might be arrested for defacing public property. (Dumbass)
The lobby is dark, and suddenly, something is heard in the next room. Harry heads towards there, but suddenly
_____________________________________________________________________________________
MWAHAHAHAHAHA- now you have to read on! More to come, and believe me...it isnt gunna be Kaufman with another name in the next room! Please review...they're really cool.
Also...anyone who knows anything about SH3 and 4...e-mail me or include it in the review.
\\DemonKnight//