CHAPTER SEVEN
The wizarding world had followed their relationship, brief though it was, with the rabid interest generally reserved for the tabloids and the Muggle royal family. Their dinner at the Leaky Cauldron and the incident with Marcus Flint was in the Daily Prophet the next morning. Their shopping trip on Diagon Alley also made the gossip pages - and the fact that Hermione had stopped by a wedding robes boutique that day with Severus had surely made the speculation worse. The paper had even caught wind of how the brief romance had ended. Hermione didn't have to be a genius to guess who had leaked that information to the public. Catherine. Hermione shuddered as the memory of Severus and Catherine kissing once again came to mind.
Of course there were also the scenes Severus had caused outside her apartment and at her office. Hermione supposed someone besides her Muggle neighbor could have heard his pounding on her apartment door and begging her to talk to him. And it was possible that her secretary or a coworker could have leaked the information to the press that Hogwarts' potions master had shown up at Hermione's lab with flowers and a sorrowful face on more than one occasion in the first week they were apart. Either way, each and every episode managed to find its way into the gossip column. Now, nearly two weeks after the end, things were finally beginning to settle down.
It was disturbing to be able to thumb through a little over three week's worth of newspapers and see the most incredible and heartbreaking relationship of your life exposed for the world to see. Merlin, there were even letters to the editor about it. Some, such as Molly Weasley, hinted that the gossip had led to the downfall of the relationship and that the paper should butt out. Others implied that Hermione and Snape had been "going at it" for years, even while she was a student, and they called for Severus' termination from Hogwarts.
At least, Hermione thought as she settled down with a novel and a cup of tea, they didn't know everything. Catherine either didn't know that she and Severus were trying to get pregnant or she decided against leaking that particular bit of information to the gossip column reporter.
"Thank Merlin for small blessings," Hermione sighed. She opened the novel and breathed in the scent of new paper and fresh ink, smiling slightly as she heard the faint crack that indicated she was the first to break the spine of the brand-new book. She snorted a bit in laughter at herself, then as she realized what she was doing.
"Only I would make a sensual experience out of opening a book," she murmured, taking a sip of tea. "Well, Severus might, too -"
Hermione set her teacup down with a thump and pushed "Professor Snape" firmly out of her mind. It was over. It had been over for nearly two weeks. She hadn't even heard from him for a week, not since that last, icy cold missive. It was Saturday, she had the day off and a stack of brand new books and, by Merlin, she wasn't going to spend her day mooning over him. He was probably already moving his things back into Catherine's apartment by now anyway, she sadly mused. Hermione expected to see some information about their reconciliation in the Daily Prophet within the next week or two.
"And then I will be painted as the 'other woman' and I'll never date again," she sighed to the empty bedroom. She abruptly stood and walked to the full-length mirror behind her door. Gazing at her reflection, she took in her curly brown hair, petite build and average figure with disdain. Catherine most assuredly had silk pajamas to lounge around in on a Saturday morning, she thought, plucking at her faded Oxford sweatshirt and looking at her ragged, cut off sweatpants. She next fixed her eyes on her flat stomach and sighed once again.
"No time like the present," she said out loud. She purposefully turned and strode to the bathroom, chuckling. "Gods, if I had known Severus Snape would make me talk to myself, I never would have touched him."
She shook her head and reached into a grocery sack, pulling out a Muggle pregnancy test. She quickly read the directions, followed them and conjured an egg timer to count down the two minutes it would take for the result to appear.
At Hogwarts, Severus Snape wasn't having a much better morning. Papers from the little idiots he was forced to teach sat untouched on his desk as he morosely gazed at the worn green velvet box perched on top of them. The box contained an engagement ring of sapphires and diamonds and a simple pair of wedding bands wrought from platinum. His grandfather had given them to him after Grammy had passed away, and he had promised to present them to his bride someday. Catherine would have been insulted by an old ring, so he had purchased her a new, large canary diamond - that she now wore as a necklace. But, Hermione would have been enchanted by the history of these rings and worn them with pride --
"Not bloody likely," muttered Severus, under his breath. He stood and began walking the floor, talking to himself. After a few moments of muttered frustration and pacing, he looked up to see Harry Potter leaning against the doorframe and grinning at him.
"Hermione has that effect on people," he said, walking in and sitting on top of one of the student desks.
"What, praytell, Mr. Potter?" snapped Snape.
"She makes people talk to themselves," Harry smiled. "I've been doing it since I was 11-years-old. I can only assume that it is worse when you are in love with her."
Severus gave the young Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher an exasperated look and walked over to sit on a desk across from him.
"What do I do, Harry?" he asked, swallowing his pride. "I love her."
"I know you do. I also know that she loves you. But, you fucked up, Snape."
"I know, I know," he sighed. "I've explained it to her. It sounded like a feeble excuse even to me, but it was the truth. It just happened, I don't know why. Maybe on some level I needed to make sure that I was doing the right thing with Hermione. Who knows? I sure don't."
"If you were anyone else, I'd say bullocks to you and you could go hang," said Harry, sternly. "But, as much as I hate to admit it, I think you are the perfect match for her. Ron and I actually thought so as far back as our school days."
Severus gave Harry a hard look of askance.
"Harry, I don't know what you think, but, we honestly never touched each other while she was in school," he said earnestly. "I'll admit that I looked and even thought about it more than once her seventh year, but I never would have touched her."
"I didn't mean that," said Harry, brushing his unruly hair from his eyes.
"You both are obsessed with potions, you're both compulsive about work and research, you both are voracious readers and aside from that, you are both complex and brilliant people. Ron and I used to joke that we needed to find out if you had a son our age so we could fix him and Hermione up. Then we found out that Hermione had a crush on you - has she told you about her thing about you and your desk?" Harry paused and pointed to Snape's desk at the head of the room. Snape nodded. "Well, let's just say I'm not surprised the two of you finally found your way to each other."
"And it lasted less than a week, yet somehow became the most important relationship of my life," said Severus bitterly. They sat in silence for a full minute, both thinking before Snape broke the silence. "Sadly, we'll never be able to try the - um, desk thing."
Harry chuckled at his former professor's attempt at humor. He stood and placed a hand on one of Severus' drooping shoulders.
"Give her some time, then try again," he said. "She needs to cool off. Why don't you wait until Christmas and then-"
"What? Show up on her doorstep with a box full of maternity clothes and a squeaky toy or two? Or should I stick with flowers?" Severus asked angrily, brushing off Harry's hand.
"I think that depends on whether or not she's -" began Harry before being interrupted.
"She's supposed to owl me when she finds out, but I haven't heard from her yet. Between losing her and the not knowing, I think I'm going insane," he said, dropping his head into his hands. "Voldemort couldn't do it over two decades, but Hermione has accomplished it in the space of less than a month."
Harry considered the man in front of him for a long moment. Hermione was being a fool, he decided. Everyone makes mistakes and she was just going to have to forgive the old bat for this one. Harry took a deep breath and promised to go talk to Hermione that afternoon.
"I'll either find out for you, or convince her to Floo or owl you," he said.
"Thank you," Severus said, rising and walking to his desk to pick up the ring box for the thousandth time that week. "And, Harry?"
"Yes?"
"Please tell her that I am sorry."
"I will."
Minutes later Harry had apparated to Hermione's door. A tear-stained face answered his knock and he silently entered and pulled her into a hug. Once she had cried herself out, he pulled away and tipped her chin up to look into her eyes.
"I just finished talking to Snape, Hermione," he said, softly. "You have to talk to him."
She shook her head.
"Hermione, I usually don't meddle, but I believe he made a mistake. I also believe you should forgive him. You are passing up what could be a very happy relationship - a very happy marriage," Harry said. She shook her head again. "Then at least give the poor man some closure if you can't forgive him. Floo him right now and hear him out, tell him off and clear the air. And you have to let him know if you're pregnant, love. It's killing him. He has a right to know, it would be his baby too, after all."
She walked away from him into her bathroom. He followed, unwilling to let it drop.
"Hermione?"
She refused to look at him or answer. She simply picked up a piece of white plastic from her countertop and silently handed it to him. Harry looked at it and then at the directions, to make sure he was reading it right. Slowly, he sat the test down and pulled Hermione into another hug.
"Hermione, you have to talk to Snape."
She just looked at him, tearfully. Harry made up his mind and walked to her fireplace and used his wand to light it. Grabbing a handful of Floo powder, he tossed some in and called, "Severus Snape." Moments later, Snape's anxious face was floating in Hermione's fireplace.
"Harry. Hermione." He said carefully, masking his emotions.
Harry took hold of one of Hermione's overstuffed chairs and scooted it in front of the fire as the distraught pair watched.
"Sit," he said to Hermione.
"Grovel," he said to Severus.
And with those pronouncements made, he apparated away. The two former lovers regarded each other warily through the eerie green flames. Severus thought that Hermione appeared to have been crying. He took a deep breath and decided to initiate the conversation.
"How are you?"
"As well as can be expected, Professor."
"Hermione, I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am. What a bastard I am. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?"
"Perhaps."
"Thank Merlin!" he said, surprised but suddenly brightening. "Hermione, I swear that I-"
"But I can never forget, Professor." Hermione said in an emotionless voice. She raised her gaze from Severus' floating head to rest on her mantel. Snape sighed and finally accepted defeat. It was over.
"Hermione?"
"Yes?"
"I need to know if you are pregnant."
"No," she said, tears once again beginning to stream down her face. "It takes some couples years to get pregnant; I don't know why I was so sure we would conceive so quickly."
"Did you still want to be, love? Despite everything?" he said, softly.
"Yes, I did."
Severus and Hermione sat quietly for a moment, the fire crackling between them. Finally, he was once again the one to break the silence.
"Hermione, I need to ask you something."
She just shrugged in answer. He supposed that meant he could ask. He did anyway.
"Did you just want to be pregnant or did you want to be pregnant with my child?"
This time, the silence stretched for an eternity as Hermione sat crying and Severus' gentle gaze watched her. After nearly a full five minutes, Hermione finally turned her watery eyes to the fireplace and his face dancing in the flames.
"Yours. I wanted to be carrying your child, Severus."
"Tell me what to do, Hermione," Severus begged. "I was the idiot, I hurt you. Tell me what to do."
"I want you to leave me alone. I never want to see you again."
He looked like she had reached through the Floo and slapped him. She only stared at him for a moment before standing and flicking her wand to terminate the connection.
Even though it was barely noon, she walked into her bedroom and crawled back into bed. She hoped to lose herself in her novel and prayed that soon sleep would give her a few hours of peace.
And even though it was barely noon, he turned from his fireplace and walked to his liquor cabinet and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. He hoped that the whiskey would help him forget and prayed that it would make him pass out soon to give him a few hours of unconscious peace.
The wizarding world had followed their relationship, brief though it was, with the rabid interest generally reserved for the tabloids and the Muggle royal family. Their dinner at the Leaky Cauldron and the incident with Marcus Flint was in the Daily Prophet the next morning. Their shopping trip on Diagon Alley also made the gossip pages - and the fact that Hermione had stopped by a wedding robes boutique that day with Severus had surely made the speculation worse. The paper had even caught wind of how the brief romance had ended. Hermione didn't have to be a genius to guess who had leaked that information to the public. Catherine. Hermione shuddered as the memory of Severus and Catherine kissing once again came to mind.
Of course there were also the scenes Severus had caused outside her apartment and at her office. Hermione supposed someone besides her Muggle neighbor could have heard his pounding on her apartment door and begging her to talk to him. And it was possible that her secretary or a coworker could have leaked the information to the press that Hogwarts' potions master had shown up at Hermione's lab with flowers and a sorrowful face on more than one occasion in the first week they were apart. Either way, each and every episode managed to find its way into the gossip column. Now, nearly two weeks after the end, things were finally beginning to settle down.
It was disturbing to be able to thumb through a little over three week's worth of newspapers and see the most incredible and heartbreaking relationship of your life exposed for the world to see. Merlin, there were even letters to the editor about it. Some, such as Molly Weasley, hinted that the gossip had led to the downfall of the relationship and that the paper should butt out. Others implied that Hermione and Snape had been "going at it" for years, even while she was a student, and they called for Severus' termination from Hogwarts.
At least, Hermione thought as she settled down with a novel and a cup of tea, they didn't know everything. Catherine either didn't know that she and Severus were trying to get pregnant or she decided against leaking that particular bit of information to the gossip column reporter.
"Thank Merlin for small blessings," Hermione sighed. She opened the novel and breathed in the scent of new paper and fresh ink, smiling slightly as she heard the faint crack that indicated she was the first to break the spine of the brand-new book. She snorted a bit in laughter at herself, then as she realized what she was doing.
"Only I would make a sensual experience out of opening a book," she murmured, taking a sip of tea. "Well, Severus might, too -"
Hermione set her teacup down with a thump and pushed "Professor Snape" firmly out of her mind. It was over. It had been over for nearly two weeks. She hadn't even heard from him for a week, not since that last, icy cold missive. It was Saturday, she had the day off and a stack of brand new books and, by Merlin, she wasn't going to spend her day mooning over him. He was probably already moving his things back into Catherine's apartment by now anyway, she sadly mused. Hermione expected to see some information about their reconciliation in the Daily Prophet within the next week or two.
"And then I will be painted as the 'other woman' and I'll never date again," she sighed to the empty bedroom. She abruptly stood and walked to the full-length mirror behind her door. Gazing at her reflection, she took in her curly brown hair, petite build and average figure with disdain. Catherine most assuredly had silk pajamas to lounge around in on a Saturday morning, she thought, plucking at her faded Oxford sweatshirt and looking at her ragged, cut off sweatpants. She next fixed her eyes on her flat stomach and sighed once again.
"No time like the present," she said out loud. She purposefully turned and strode to the bathroom, chuckling. "Gods, if I had known Severus Snape would make me talk to myself, I never would have touched him."
She shook her head and reached into a grocery sack, pulling out a Muggle pregnancy test. She quickly read the directions, followed them and conjured an egg timer to count down the two minutes it would take for the result to appear.
At Hogwarts, Severus Snape wasn't having a much better morning. Papers from the little idiots he was forced to teach sat untouched on his desk as he morosely gazed at the worn green velvet box perched on top of them. The box contained an engagement ring of sapphires and diamonds and a simple pair of wedding bands wrought from platinum. His grandfather had given them to him after Grammy had passed away, and he had promised to present them to his bride someday. Catherine would have been insulted by an old ring, so he had purchased her a new, large canary diamond - that she now wore as a necklace. But, Hermione would have been enchanted by the history of these rings and worn them with pride --
"Not bloody likely," muttered Severus, under his breath. He stood and began walking the floor, talking to himself. After a few moments of muttered frustration and pacing, he looked up to see Harry Potter leaning against the doorframe and grinning at him.
"Hermione has that effect on people," he said, walking in and sitting on top of one of the student desks.
"What, praytell, Mr. Potter?" snapped Snape.
"She makes people talk to themselves," Harry smiled. "I've been doing it since I was 11-years-old. I can only assume that it is worse when you are in love with her."
Severus gave the young Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher an exasperated look and walked over to sit on a desk across from him.
"What do I do, Harry?" he asked, swallowing his pride. "I love her."
"I know you do. I also know that she loves you. But, you fucked up, Snape."
"I know, I know," he sighed. "I've explained it to her. It sounded like a feeble excuse even to me, but it was the truth. It just happened, I don't know why. Maybe on some level I needed to make sure that I was doing the right thing with Hermione. Who knows? I sure don't."
"If you were anyone else, I'd say bullocks to you and you could go hang," said Harry, sternly. "But, as much as I hate to admit it, I think you are the perfect match for her. Ron and I actually thought so as far back as our school days."
Severus gave Harry a hard look of askance.
"Harry, I don't know what you think, but, we honestly never touched each other while she was in school," he said earnestly. "I'll admit that I looked and even thought about it more than once her seventh year, but I never would have touched her."
"I didn't mean that," said Harry, brushing his unruly hair from his eyes.
"You both are obsessed with potions, you're both compulsive about work and research, you both are voracious readers and aside from that, you are both complex and brilliant people. Ron and I used to joke that we needed to find out if you had a son our age so we could fix him and Hermione up. Then we found out that Hermione had a crush on you - has she told you about her thing about you and your desk?" Harry paused and pointed to Snape's desk at the head of the room. Snape nodded. "Well, let's just say I'm not surprised the two of you finally found your way to each other."
"And it lasted less than a week, yet somehow became the most important relationship of my life," said Severus bitterly. They sat in silence for a full minute, both thinking before Snape broke the silence. "Sadly, we'll never be able to try the - um, desk thing."
Harry chuckled at his former professor's attempt at humor. He stood and placed a hand on one of Severus' drooping shoulders.
"Give her some time, then try again," he said. "She needs to cool off. Why don't you wait until Christmas and then-"
"What? Show up on her doorstep with a box full of maternity clothes and a squeaky toy or two? Or should I stick with flowers?" Severus asked angrily, brushing off Harry's hand.
"I think that depends on whether or not she's -" began Harry before being interrupted.
"She's supposed to owl me when she finds out, but I haven't heard from her yet. Between losing her and the not knowing, I think I'm going insane," he said, dropping his head into his hands. "Voldemort couldn't do it over two decades, but Hermione has accomplished it in the space of less than a month."
Harry considered the man in front of him for a long moment. Hermione was being a fool, he decided. Everyone makes mistakes and she was just going to have to forgive the old bat for this one. Harry took a deep breath and promised to go talk to Hermione that afternoon.
"I'll either find out for you, or convince her to Floo or owl you," he said.
"Thank you," Severus said, rising and walking to his desk to pick up the ring box for the thousandth time that week. "And, Harry?"
"Yes?"
"Please tell her that I am sorry."
"I will."
Minutes later Harry had apparated to Hermione's door. A tear-stained face answered his knock and he silently entered and pulled her into a hug. Once she had cried herself out, he pulled away and tipped her chin up to look into her eyes.
"I just finished talking to Snape, Hermione," he said, softly. "You have to talk to him."
She shook her head.
"Hermione, I usually don't meddle, but I believe he made a mistake. I also believe you should forgive him. You are passing up what could be a very happy relationship - a very happy marriage," Harry said. She shook her head again. "Then at least give the poor man some closure if you can't forgive him. Floo him right now and hear him out, tell him off and clear the air. And you have to let him know if you're pregnant, love. It's killing him. He has a right to know, it would be his baby too, after all."
She walked away from him into her bathroom. He followed, unwilling to let it drop.
"Hermione?"
She refused to look at him or answer. She simply picked up a piece of white plastic from her countertop and silently handed it to him. Harry looked at it and then at the directions, to make sure he was reading it right. Slowly, he sat the test down and pulled Hermione into another hug.
"Hermione, you have to talk to Snape."
She just looked at him, tearfully. Harry made up his mind and walked to her fireplace and used his wand to light it. Grabbing a handful of Floo powder, he tossed some in and called, "Severus Snape." Moments later, Snape's anxious face was floating in Hermione's fireplace.
"Harry. Hermione." He said carefully, masking his emotions.
Harry took hold of one of Hermione's overstuffed chairs and scooted it in front of the fire as the distraught pair watched.
"Sit," he said to Hermione.
"Grovel," he said to Severus.
And with those pronouncements made, he apparated away. The two former lovers regarded each other warily through the eerie green flames. Severus thought that Hermione appeared to have been crying. He took a deep breath and decided to initiate the conversation.
"How are you?"
"As well as can be expected, Professor."
"Hermione, I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am. What a bastard I am. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?"
"Perhaps."
"Thank Merlin!" he said, surprised but suddenly brightening. "Hermione, I swear that I-"
"But I can never forget, Professor." Hermione said in an emotionless voice. She raised her gaze from Severus' floating head to rest on her mantel. Snape sighed and finally accepted defeat. It was over.
"Hermione?"
"Yes?"
"I need to know if you are pregnant."
"No," she said, tears once again beginning to stream down her face. "It takes some couples years to get pregnant; I don't know why I was so sure we would conceive so quickly."
"Did you still want to be, love? Despite everything?" he said, softly.
"Yes, I did."
Severus and Hermione sat quietly for a moment, the fire crackling between them. Finally, he was once again the one to break the silence.
"Hermione, I need to ask you something."
She just shrugged in answer. He supposed that meant he could ask. He did anyway.
"Did you just want to be pregnant or did you want to be pregnant with my child?"
This time, the silence stretched for an eternity as Hermione sat crying and Severus' gentle gaze watched her. After nearly a full five minutes, Hermione finally turned her watery eyes to the fireplace and his face dancing in the flames.
"Yours. I wanted to be carrying your child, Severus."
"Tell me what to do, Hermione," Severus begged. "I was the idiot, I hurt you. Tell me what to do."
"I want you to leave me alone. I never want to see you again."
He looked like she had reached through the Floo and slapped him. She only stared at him for a moment before standing and flicking her wand to terminate the connection.
Even though it was barely noon, she walked into her bedroom and crawled back into bed. She hoped to lose herself in her novel and prayed that soon sleep would give her a few hours of peace.
And even though it was barely noon, he turned from his fireplace and walked to his liquor cabinet and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. He hoped that the whiskey would help him forget and prayed that it would make him pass out soon to give him a few hours of unconscious peace.