tipitoes: I'm glad you liked the chap, it was a bit weird!!! ^_^v
Katronette: You like Haldir? Cool! Me too! He was acted by a guy called Craig Parker. I saw an interview with him and Strassman, it was cool and he looks like a really sweet guy too (he reminds me of my cousin, freaky!). He's a New Zealander! What a legend!!! Kiwis rock the world!! (*blatant patriotism*) He used to act on Shortland Street, which is a load of crap, but if he's in it, I'll watch it! ~^_^~ Go Haldir! We might stick him in the fic if at all possible!
Walawalabear: Yeah, we got a lot of Beatles songs in there, hehehehe!
Aarundell: Don't worry!!! Cho will not, I repeat, will not get Legolas!!! It's okay!!! Sorry about the song titles, it was late at night when we wrote it.
zeynel: Writing! Right now! Promise!
Europa: Yeah, we went down the back of all our CDs and grabbing the best sounding titles. Some are kiwi bands, which are really good (*cough*Zed*cough*). The awesome foursome will be up to tricks in no time! You'll see! ^_~
Psyco101: Don't worry about the sugar, I just ate poached eggs on toast, so no suger there. The last chap was kinda a filler chap for this one. It had one important sentence we needed said. Oh well!
Shadow Pals: Wow! When you review, you sure review! Cool! ^_^ I'm glad we pleased you! That's what we're here for! And Sauron doesn't have Balrogs, I've read the books, I know. ^_^ But he does have Dark Riders! Anyway, thanks for reviewing all those times!! =oD
Pip: Well, there's the review reviews. Merri's on the phone, she'll be back in a sec, but in the meantime, I'll get started!
DISCLAIMER: WE DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER OR LOTR, SO DON'T SUE US!!! Thank you! ~^_^~
CHAPTER NINE: [INSERT REALLY GOOD TITLE HERE]
"Lord! Lord Voldemort!" A man ran into Voldemort's hideout. He was wearing the guise of a Death Eater, dark cloak and all. "Lord Voldemort!" All the others in the hideout turned their heads and stared at him as he came in. Voldemort himself looked up.
"Who's there? What do you want?" he demanded. The man fell down onto his knees in front of Voldemort's throne.
"Lord, I have seen him, I know where he is who carries-" he stuttered. Voldemort cut him off sharply.
"Do not speak of it aloud!" he thundered. "Where is it?" The man trembled.
"It -he- is at Hogwarts. Under the protection of Harry Potter." He cowered away, expecting the blast that usually befell such unlucky messengers who bore bad tidings to the Lord. He felt nothing and dared a peek up at his master. Voldemort's face had gone white with red blotches. He looked about on the very of an apoplexy. But then he smoothed his face and smiled.
"It is all the better for me. That way I can deal with both of my opponents at once." He rose abruptly. "Leave. You may get some refreshments. Worm tongue! Come with me!" He swept away, Wormtongue following miserably.
"Grima. We must form some sort of plan. We can only get to it if we get rid of Potter first, once and for all. That shouldn't be hard if we catch him alone." Voldemort paced up and down, smoothing his beard thoughtfully. "We need some sort of bait... Wormtongue?" He turned an evil eye on the pathetic Wormtongue. "Wouldn't a friend of yours be perfect? You know he wants you, to redeem his godfather Sirius. Oh, you are one of many names, aren't you? Grima, Wormtongue, Peter Pettigrew, Wormtail, Scabbers... how many more do you own?" Voldemort paused and turned on the whimpering Peter, who mumbled something under his breath. "What was that?" Peter, emboldened all of a sudden, spoke up.
"I said, you have many names too, Lord Voldemort, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, The Dark Lord, You-Know-Who, Sar-"
"That'll do, Worm," Voldemort snapped, going a little red. "I did not expect to be spoken back to like that! How dare you parade your insolence! If I wanted to hear you speak, I would have asked!" Peter fell silent, feeling unjustly done by. Voldemort resumed his pacing, muttering different ideas for the solution to his problem. "If I could only... but if... get him... finally..."
Suddenly he stopped. Peter looked up, still nursing resentment. Voldemort looked triumphantly at him with glowing eyes.
"I have it! I'll get Potter, and I'll get the Ring!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Sam! Sam! Come quick!"
"Yeah! Sam! Frodo's in trouble!" Merry and Pippin's voices rang through the halls. They had already made sure that Frodo was safely ensconced in the library before setting out. Sam looked up.
"What? Where?" Merry and Pippin screeched to a halt.
"Sam! Frodo's in trouble outside! Come quick!"
"Hurry!" The three tore off through the halls to the front door. Merry and Pippin stopped at the door and pushed it open.
"Go on Sam!" Sam ran through without thinking- and slipped on the Slippery Sludge (copyright Weasley's Wizard Wheezes) placed strategically at the top to the front stairs. Sam rolled down the steps, landing with a bump at the bottom, where he was alternately doused in honey and feathers. He stood up, looking angry.
"That wasn't funny!" he said, putting his hands on his hips. Merry and Pippin had fallen about laughing, and two people could be heard from next to the steps out of sight, which meant George and Fred had something to do with this.
"Oh! On the contrary!" George emerged, followed by Fred.
"Hey! Sam's a bird!" cried Merry.
"A fluffy bird!" joined Pippin.
"Sam doesn't usually have birdlike qualities does he?"
"Maybe he only does if he bounces down the stairs!"
"Maybe if we bounce him back up, he'll turn into himself again!"
"Yeah!" The four began to laugh harder. Sam looked disapproving.
"Merry! You are being very irresponsible! No one would think you'd been of age for four years! What kind of example are you setting for the impressionable youth!?" he lectured. This made the four laugh even harder.
"But Sam!" protested Merry. "You're just too funny!"
"Third time this week!" cried Fred, who was practically in hysterics.
"You know who else is easy to get? Ron. And Neville," George's eyes gleamed mischievously. Sam tried to look dignified as he headed back up the steps, trailing drips of honey and feathers. The four laughed even more. Harry, Hermione and Ron appeared at the door.
"What's going on?" asked Harry, looking around at poor Sam and the four hyenas. Hermione looked sympathetically at Sam.
"Oh, you poor thing! They're so mean to you! Here, I'll fix you up." Suddenly Ron whispered something in her ear and a smile widened on her face. She pulled out her wand.
"Transferio terridum!" The feathers and honey disappeared from Sam. He grinned.
"Thanks, Hermione." Suddenly Merry and Pippin started laughing even harder (if possible). Everyone else looked around. Pippin pointed a shaking finger. Sam laughed. George and Fred were covered in honey and feathers.
"ROOOON!!!!!!" they roared.
"uh oh." Ron backed away. Fred and George made a dash for him and promptly slipped on their own Slippery Sludge and fell flat on their faces at the bottom of the stairs. Tears rolled down the hobbits' faces, they were laughing so hard. Fred looked at George. George looked at Fred.
"Looks like the jokes on us!"
"You look so stupid, covered in feathers!"
"So do you!" Soon they were laughing along with everyone else. Pippin grinned at Sam.
"Sorry, Sam, we'll try not to prank you any more, okay?"
"Yeah," agreed Merry, whose face was full of mirth. Sam smiled.
"You just better not, or it'll be the worse for you!" He shook a finger and them and went off inside. Pippin and Merry grinned at each other and uncrossed their fingers behind their backs.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Voldemort stayed hidden outside of Hogsmead. He looked at Peter.
"You do know what you have to do?" Peter nodded. "Then go." At once, Peter disappeared. Voldemort smiled and cloaked himself, vanishing into thin air. A sinister laugh floated on the wind.
"At last I'll get you Potter...."
Unnoticed, a rather tatty looking rat scurried towards the Forbidden Forest of Hogwarts, on a mission. And he must not fail.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
AN: Pip: OOOOOOOOHHHH!!!!!!!
Merri: Sinister! All we need now is a good thunderstorm!
Pip: So how was that? Much better I hope.
Merri: It was too short.
Pip: The next one'll make up for it, probably. No promises.
Merri: We might get Raen to help us, she's good at writing. Better than Squid anyway. But Squid's on camp so it doesn't matter.
Pip: Yesiree! So long, fare thee well, pip pip, cheerio, we'll write more soon! Toodle pip!
Merri: Yay I got the last word! And the last word is gonna be:
SPLUNGE!!!!!