Vulture Chapter Four, a dollanganger saga fanfic

"VULTURE" by Alessandra Azzaroni

STORY LAST UPDATED ON 05/02/2003

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Written in Australia. Sovereign Hill, Ballarat, is a real place in the state of Victoria in Australia.

CHAPTER FOUR

I sat in the grey chair beside her bed. I was tired. I wanted to stay awake, to be there for her if she awoke, but instead I ended up falling asleep, sitting upright.

You sleep with your sedative, and I sleep with my fatigue
You dream that it's all a dream, and I dream that I won't wake up

"Killer!"
The almost breathless whispered exclamation woke me from the blessed comfort of nothingness. Had I dreamed that word, or had it been for real? Or did my own conscience suddenly speak out to me?
"You killed my husband. You killed my son."
I cleared my eyes open, and I turned my head slowly to the left. My mother was awake, sitting up. Her hair was flattened and frizzy from her sleep, but her eyes did not seem hazy as they stared at me.
"You… you're a killer, but you're still alive. Why did you kill them?" she suddenly screamed, eyes wide with fury and fire. It had to have been me she was talking to. But I hadn't killed anyone; at least, not that I remembered.
"Lisa… Lisa Camberwell, you - You killed my family!" Her eyes became teary as she began her monologue.
"They say that guns don't kill people, people kill people. They say that children can't possibly kill, but then why is every outcast teenager in America shooting their peers? And you… you're not any different. You decided in your sick, twisted little mind that you wanted to take away the two people in my life who mean the most to me. And you wanted to kill me, too! Why did I survive? Why did you let me survive? Did you just want me to feel the pain?
"You planned it, didn't you? You went off to your party knowing very well you could get a lift home with someone else, but instead you called us, knowing that all the rest of us would come. You set up for that race to be on, you set up the cars behind us and you set up for us to die!
"You're a vulture, Lisa, a vulture. And do you know the exact meaning of the word? A vulture is a large bird that feeds on carrion. And do you know what carrion is? Rotting, dead flesh! And you like it that they're both dead, because you're a vulture!
"I know why you killed baby Robert, Lisa, don't think that I don't. You wanted him to die because if he lived, you'd be the lonely one, because all three of us would be united. And you wanted Matthew to die because you wanted to bring me pain! You'd kill your own father just to bring pain to me.
"And bringing pain to me is easy for you, isn't it, because we're not related. Don't look so shocked, Lisa, as if you couldn't guess! We don't even look alike! I'm a blonde, and you're the spitting image of your American whore of a mother!
"Matthew had always kept his family separate from me, as if I wasn't good enough for them. He kept his whole life secret from me, but I found out about it. I know that he met her in a pub near the manufacturer's he was visiting, and I know that she ran the hotel there in Sovereign Hill. And I know that she took my husband from me!
"He didn't tell me about any of this, oh no. He didn't tell me that he impregnated her, and that she wasn't going to abort it, or give it up for adoption. He wanted a child, but he didn't want mine! So he said he'd keep the baby, you, and make up a story.
"And he did! He said that his sister had died and that you were her baby, to explain the family resemblance. And I wanted to believe him so badly that I did believe him, although I knew all about Alison.
"But I knew the moment my husband and son died that you definitely were her daughter. Alison hated me because Matthew wouldn't leave me for her.
"But you know what, Lisa? I know something that will hurt you more than anything else in the world. She didn't want you! That's why she was so willing to just hand you over to my husband. No one wants to be a single mother, and that whore was no different. She practically raped him to keep him to her forever. She did things to him that I refused to do, and he did things to her that he wouldn't do to me.
"She was a vulture just like you, Lisa, and probably still is. In fact, I've been doing some investigating lately, and she still runs The Sovereign. Also, there are some positions available in Sovereign Hill for the holidays, and maybe even beyond.
"This place is perfect for you, I know you've always loved going there. And guess what? It'll be like you dream job to work there! And it'll be a perfect opportunity for you to meet your mother, because you'll get housing in The Sovereign. Don't be surprised, Lisa, that I'm actually encouraging this. I've been planning ever since I learned I was pregnant with Robert that I would send you there, and you'd meet Alison and you'd know the truth. You'll know it as soon as you see her.
"You can live with me for the meantime, until you go down to your interview. Since you're good at cooking, I think one of the bakeries would be perfect for you. You can dress up in the special olden day outfits and bake those old-fashioned goods. You'll be a shoe-in! And then you'll move there, and I'll be free!
"I know you're a vulture and a killer, Lisa, but I'm giving you this chance because I somewhat care for you. Even though you're not mine. Aren't I nice? And I hope you're happy with your murderousness.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, Lisa, I need more sleep, but I'm glad we had this talk."
Without another word, she lay down properly and conked out immediately.
I had been wordless the whole time, without emotion as I listened to her rant. But it was more than just a rant - it was the truth. I couldn't confirm that, but I believed everything she said.
Everything she said about not being my mother, anyway. A killer, me? Maybe I was. Maybe my father and my not-yet-born half-brother were my carrion. And I was the vulture.

I stalk around, searching endlessly to find what I'm looking for
And I spot it
I don't have to kill, because it's already dead and waiting for me
It fuels my fire and feeds my hunger
I am a vulture