Title: Without You Part 2
Everything else is in part one
Enjoy!
*************
I blink back tears because I know that I could recognize that tall, lanky figure anywhere.
Mulder stands before me with William on his hip. I stand awe struck as I stare at the two. Mulder has a huge grin on his face that makes his hazel eyes twinkle with delight.
"Mulder," I say hoarsely through the tears, "I thought I'd never see you again."
Mulder's smile falls quickly as he lets Will down. My little baby toddles over to me. I pick my son up. Feeling him is so surreal. His beautiful laugh is music to my ears.
I look back at Mulder questioningly.
"Is this Heaven?" I ask skeptically.
"No, Scully this is the dream world you escape to," Mulder tells me, matter of fact.
He walks closer to me and places his hand on my abdomen like he once did months ago.
"Mulder?" I question.
Mulder moves in to kiss me. I don't resist and kiss him back. How many times have I hungered to kiss his pouty lips just once more in the last three days?
"You're having my baby," Mulder says in his dry-wit tone.
"What are you talking about?" I ask him, confused.
But then I start to remember the past few weeks: often trips to the bathroom, dizzy spells, fatigue and the nausea. I couldn't be. It was impossible once to get pregnant, but twice? How likely is that?
"Scully, you've got to take care of yourself. You need to for me--for this kid. I'll always be with you. Believe it or not there is such a thing as guardian angels," he tells me gloating at the fact that he has been right all along about such things as angels.
"What about a second chance, Mulder? A parallel universe where I can get you back, get William back?" I say nearly screaming at him.
He smirks at the idea of me believing the paranormal.
"Scully, what the hell has happened to your scientific background? Your cynical ideas?"
"You happened."
The smirk on Mulder's face disappears quickly and he pulls me toward him.
"I'm so sorry, Scully, but you've got to go back. You've got to fight the fight. Fight it for the child that dwells in your womb," he says caressing my hair as he plants a kiss on my forehead.
"I don't think I can do it without you. I need you," I plead with him.
"I'm always with you, Scully, fight for us."
Mulder fades from my vision along with William. His voice echoes through my memory as I struggle to open my eyes.
"Dana, honey, its Mom." I hear very faintly at first, but I come out of my dream-like state.
After minutes of a hard struggle I succeed in opening my eyes. My mother sits next to me, her head down in defeat. Nothing stirs in the quiet room; except for the monitor registering my heart beat. Still strong and steady.
I squeeze my mom's hand tightly. She reacts slowly, not believing it. My mom finally locks her eyes on me.
"Hi," I whisper.
She doesn't respond as my mother grabs me and hugs me, holding on for dear life.
"I thought I had lost you," my mother says tears forming in her eyes.
I shake my head. Looking around the small, dim, hospital room I see an IV hooked up to my arm and the machine that is monitoring my steady heartbeat.
"Mom, what happened to me?" I inquire, whispering.
"I'll call your doctor and he can talk to you. He wouldn't tell me much more than that you are going to be just fine."
I watch her leave the room and place my hand on my abdomen thinking of the relationship that I had with my mother. It was something that obviously had its ups and downs, but she is all I have left, except for this child.
Footsteps echo outside my room and get closer. Instinctively I pull my hand off my abdomen remembering the early days of my pregnancy with William. I had those rare moments where I could touch my abdomen and feel some sort of connection with him. During those days I couldn't let others see me, I thought that they'd use the pregnancy against me in the search for Mulder.
A young man in a white coat walks through my hospital door, looking at his chart.
"Ms. Scully, how are you feeling?"
"I'm fine," I tell him, knowing that it isn't true. Buddy, do you want to know how I feel? I've lost the two most important people in my life and you wonder how I'm feeling?
"Do you know what happened to you?" Doogie asks.
"I passed out and woke up here. What exactly is wrong with me?" I question already knowing the answer.
"Ms. Scully, I'm happy to tell you that you are pregnant," he tells me, beaming. I wonder just how many times Doogie here has told someone that they are expecting.
Even though I had some sort of intuition to it and all the signs of pregnancy were there it is still shocking to here someone else tell me. Another child. Another miracle that probably shouldn't have happened. For Christ-sake's I'm almost 38 years old and I have no one to help me raise this child.
I smirk at the situation. Just two years before I was in the same predicament--pregnant and alone. And this time I know that Mulder will never be home. He'll never come back to me and neither will my son, the child that I thought I'd never have.
"Ms. Scully?" the young doctor says, breaking my trance-like state.
"I'm sorry?"
"I said that you should make an appointment with the doctor that delivered your son. You appear to be almost 6 weeks," he says as my mom walks through the door.
"I'll check on you later," he says and sheepishly grins at my mother as he walks out of the room.
At this moment I don't even want to look at my mother so I stare at my hands. She watches me, trying to figure out what is going on with me, what the doctor said.
I finally direct my gaze at her, my eyes full of tears.
"Mom, I...um...I'm pregnant," I say breaking into sobs.
"Oh Dana," she rushes to my side and holds me.
"What am I going to do?" I whimper holding onto my mother for the first time in about thirty-four years.
"I don't know, honey, but you'll get through this. Dana, you have always been the strong one in the family and you'll find a way," my mom whispers.
Tears continue streaming down my face. Me the strong one? I've always been the strong one, but Mulder was the one I'd lean on. I'd play the strong one, but he and I dealt with everything together. He'd lean on me and I'd lean on him. We were an amazing pair and I don't know how I'll get through. I don't know if I want to--if I can.
"Mom, I..."
"What, Dana?"
"I can't do this alone," I finally tell her, sobs racking through my body.
"I'll always be here for you sweetheart."
She takes me and wraps me in a deep hug.
"I know, Mom, I know"
J. Edgar Hoover Building
X-Files Office
March 4, 2002
Walking down the basement hallway that I always used to bring back tons of memories.
I stop and stare at the blank door. His nameplate is now gone, only two boltholes are left.
I close my eyes and remember.
"Nobody down here, except the FBI's most unwanted," Mulder says through the closed door.
Still watching his figure hunched over a slide reel I smile.
"I'm Dana Scully, I've been assigned to work with you," I tell him naively.
"I was under the impression you were sent to spy on me."
"Agent Scully, I didn't expect to see you back soon," Doggett says bringing me back to the present.
I turn around startled and look at the man that I've worked with for over two years.
"Agent Doggett, you startled me," I tell him as I proceed to open the door and walk into the office.
He shrugs an apology and heads for his desk in the office--the newer of the two.
I head to mine, Mulder's desk. Sitting down and looking at the cluttered mess on the desk gives me something to do.
I grab at the first file in the stack on the desk and start to rummage through it. Another unexplained alien abduction.
After awhile I somehow managed to swivel my chair around and I must have been staring at the 'I WANT TO BELIEVE' poster.
"I'm sorry, Dana," Agent Doggett says now standing in front of my desk. "I know that this isn't consolation to you, but I know exactly how you feel and I just wanted you to know that I'll always be here for you to talk to."
I stare at the poster a minute longer and then swivel the chair back around. "I know, John, thanks."
TO BE CONTINUED
More to come, stay tuned!