Title: Cold Fire
Author: sparky8me2 (sparky8me2@hotmail.com)
Summary: Giles has a lot on his mind after Jenny's death as he prepares to go after Angelus. Spoiler Warning: Season two, namely Passions
Disclaimer: None of these people belong to me. They're the creation of Joss Whedon. No money is or ever will be made from this.
Distribution: Just lemme know where it's going
I am absolutely numb. I knew Angelus was capable of... terrible evil, but not once had the thought entered my mind that Jenny was in danger. Not once had I ever considered....
I should have. I should have suspected that he would find in Jenny, the means to harm us all. Or more likely, the means to drive me to miscalculate in passionate vengeance and kill me, thereby causing even further harm to Buffy.
I loved her. I never had the opportunity- no, I never had the courage- to tell her, but I did. And now it's too late. I'll never again get to see her smile. Never hear her laugh. I believe right now, I would give anything in the world just for one fleeting moment to hear her voice again. To hold her. To kiss her. Little else seems to matter right now. Aside from the wrenching, unwavering knowledge I'll never be able to do any of that again.
I am well aware I told Buffy not to fall for Angelus's taunts, but this... this is going too far to simply ignore. I can feel, just past this thinning veil of mind-numbing shock, anger and hatred embracing me purposely with cold fire. If the logical part of my mind wasn't currently drowned out by matters of the heart, it would no doubt remind me that Angelus, should I face him, will very likely kill me. But I'm beyond caring. The only thing on my mind is finding Angelus, and inflicting as much injury upon him as I possibly can.
And I shall. Because there's nothing else I can do. Nothing else I want to do. There is something rather disturbing about this bloodlust surging through my veins, but a deeper part of me needs to embrace it. It is the only way to put this to rest. Jenny's killer must be destroyed for her- and indeed, myself- to find peace.
It's not that I doubt Buffy would be unable to deal with Angelus herself- given time, of course, for all of this has been dreadfully hard on her- but this is not her fight now. He has made certain of that. It's mine. And by God, I shall meet it head on.
Author: sparky8me2 (sparky8me2@hotmail.com)
Summary: Giles has a lot on his mind after Jenny's death as he prepares to go after Angelus. Spoiler Warning: Season two, namely Passions
Disclaimer: None of these people belong to me. They're the creation of Joss Whedon. No money is or ever will be made from this.
Distribution: Just lemme know where it's going
I am absolutely numb. I knew Angelus was capable of... terrible evil, but not once had the thought entered my mind that Jenny was in danger. Not once had I ever considered....
I should have. I should have suspected that he would find in Jenny, the means to harm us all. Or more likely, the means to drive me to miscalculate in passionate vengeance and kill me, thereby causing even further harm to Buffy.
I loved her. I never had the opportunity- no, I never had the courage- to tell her, but I did. And now it's too late. I'll never again get to see her smile. Never hear her laugh. I believe right now, I would give anything in the world just for one fleeting moment to hear her voice again. To hold her. To kiss her. Little else seems to matter right now. Aside from the wrenching, unwavering knowledge I'll never be able to do any of that again.
I am well aware I told Buffy not to fall for Angelus's taunts, but this... this is going too far to simply ignore. I can feel, just past this thinning veil of mind-numbing shock, anger and hatred embracing me purposely with cold fire. If the logical part of my mind wasn't currently drowned out by matters of the heart, it would no doubt remind me that Angelus, should I face him, will very likely kill me. But I'm beyond caring. The only thing on my mind is finding Angelus, and inflicting as much injury upon him as I possibly can.
And I shall. Because there's nothing else I can do. Nothing else I want to do. There is something rather disturbing about this bloodlust surging through my veins, but a deeper part of me needs to embrace it. It is the only way to put this to rest. Jenny's killer must be destroyed for her- and indeed, myself- to find peace.
It's not that I doubt Buffy would be unable to deal with Angelus herself- given time, of course, for all of this has been dreadfully hard on her- but this is not her fight now. He has made certain of that. It's mine. And by God, I shall meet it head on.