~*+*~

Nervous Will paced the bridge, driving his fellow officers slowly insane. This was the fourth day in row Deanna was down on Romulus, alone. He hadn't felt comfortable about her mission to begin with and since the incident at the Holodeck he had only become less comfortable. Each of the three women had refused to tell him what was going on with Deanna and she had looked completely drained when she returned to the ship last night. He was close to being worried out of his mind.

~*+*~

"I must say Ambassador Troi, you and I are more alike then I thought when we first met."

"Looks can be deceiving, don't you agree *commander*?" The romulan woman smiled genuinely and raised her glass. "To the treaty Major Rakal."

"To the treaty high-commander Toreth." From the first minute she had entered the chamber in which the Romulan High-command was seated Deanna had felt a sense of peace and quiet. After having been aboard star ships for the past two month it was a joy to be in a more scarcely populated area again. Far less unwanted thoughts and emotions would attack her here and then there was of course the odd density of the walls of the camber she was sitting in seemed to have some kind of muting effect on her telepathic awareness.

She studied the room once again, the interior was amazing. Quite different from how she had imagined it when still onboard the Enterprise. Green light illuminated the giant room, throwing mysterious shadows on the statues and ornaments. The most-likely handcrafted statues portrayed the mythological ancestors. Earlier that day I'ahj Toreth had told her the myths related to the statues.

~*+*~

"Hi," Kyleigh smoothly slid into the chair and eyed the occupant of the other one carefully, "I, uh...I wanted to thank you...for the other day. I hope captain Riker wasn't too hard on you." The young man put his glass down and leaned slightly forward. "Calo was out of line, I did it more for his sake than ours really." He watched his visitor smile; she had the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. Small dimples appeared in her chin and the corners of her mouth and sparkles of joy brightened her eyes.

"My mother told me as much." She could hit herself for saying that! Her mother had been so persistent on keeping the changes she'd undergone quiet ad here she was, telling them to the first man she encountered. "I thought Ambassador Troi was an empath?"

"She, uhm...she is. She must have drawn her conclusion from what she sensed of you." He seemed to search her eyes for something, then suddenly grinned and took another sip of his drink. "So what do you think of the Titan?" For a moment she lost herself in his green eyes, but managed to answer before making a fool out of herself. "She's definitely more elegant than the Enterprise." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, "is that a yes or a no?"

"It's a no I'm afraid."

"Oh...any particular reason? We got the best captain you know." She barely managed to keep the dismay of her face. She'd seen her father a couple of times and her mother had told her everything about him, sometimes through tears, sometimes not. She treasured that what her mother had told her, but she couldn't help being angry at him.

"That's what you think." She answered playfully, "but, before you interrogate me any further, I don't think I know your name."

"Well, then I at least know you're not a telepath. I'm Ian."

"Nice to meet you Ian, and I have only very limited telepathic powers." Again she seemed to drown in his eyes, but this time --unbeknownst to her-- he felt the same. The young woman across him had the most amazing eyes. He had heard that all Betazoids had black eyes, but hers had an almost magical glimmer, like the black hair of a horse.

"Erm...I-uh, I should go back. Duty and all." His eyes sparkled when he grinned, she realized that for the first time since she'd sat down at his table she was able to sense something from him. It was only the second time that had ever happened to her before; her own emotions were blocking her sense of him. "Maybe we can hook up tonight?" He asked as he stood up.

"Yeah," she whispered in return, "that would be nice."

~*+*~

Deanna thoroughly enjoyed her time on Romulus, she had learned a great deal more about their culture and her 'reunion' with Toreth had been far more relaxed then she had expected. Apparently Toreth had received a promotion not soon after the ordeal for catching N'Vek and bringing the possible cross-way to the attention of the Romulan Senate, thereby preventing other's from crossing over as well. And after her anger towards Deanna had subdued she had realized her situation and actually admired her for handling her role that convincing. It was for those reasons she had requested Troi's presence on the Federation delegation team.

"The vi'inerine tastes delicious." Slowly Toreth raised her eyes and looked at Troi, a small smile playing around her lips. "Really?" Noticing the mischievous sparkle in her eyes Deanna suddenly recalled her little 'incident' with the vi'inerine dish when on board the Kazara. "I actually spend the first week after I returned learning all Romulan dishes", she revealed. Surprised Toreth searched her eyes. "Ezu grap."

Troi grinned, "nope I'm not joking. I was so terrified of the thought ever ending up in a situation like that again that I spent the first two weeks studying Romulan culture." Stunned the Romulan woman glanced at the dark-haired beauty across the table, "you're not serious are you?" Instead of answer Troi merely looked...and looked...and looked until Toreth started laughing. "Well, I always thought you were an --what's the expression? Something with an animal."

"Eager beaver."

"Right! That's the one." The Betazoid smiled pleasantly and then drank the last bit of her wine. "It's been a long day High-Commander, if you'll excuse me I think I'll retire for--" Deanna flew upright from her chair, pushing the furniture backwards with such force it fell over. Her hands flew to her temples trying to master the pain embedding itself in her mind. "Help me", she begged with a small voice before falling unconscious.

~*+*~

"Enterprise?" Riker shot to his feet, finally something to take his mind off Deanna down on Romulus. "Enterprise, do you read? This is High-Commander Toreth, do you read?" Or so he thought.

"High-Commander? This is Captain--"

"Good, I need a direct link to either lieutenant Troi or Doctor Crusher. NOW" Her demands confused the hell out of all officers present on the bridge, but just when Will was about to ask for an explanation a second person hailed the bridge. "Lieutenant Troi to bridge, beam the ambassador to sickbay, *now*!" Startled by the urge in her voice Riker froze for a second, trying to decide whether to do as asked, or ask for an explanation. With a nod he ordered his helm-officer to beam Deanna to sickbay.

"All right, High-Commander, Miss Troi. I'd like to know what's happening." For a moment there was an uncomfortable silence, but then Toreth broke it. "Captain, with your permission I would like to come on board to see how Ambassador Troi is doing? Not to mention I'd like to meet that famous daughter of hers." Will blinked his eyes, swallowed and blinked again. What the heck was going on?! Keeping the delicacy of the negotiations in mind Riker reluctantly agreed. He would get his answers and if not, he would have to abort the mission. Deanna Troi might be an ambassador, but she wasn't a captain.

~*+*~

Three days. Three days since Deanna's latest accident and no explanation. Beverly would simply claim doctor-patient confidentiality and Lieutenant Troi would throw him a glare that could literally knock the air right out of him. And Deanna wasn't left alone for a single second. She hadn't left her quarters since released from sickbay and was always in the company of either Beverly or her daughter or --most surprisingly-- Toreth. She seemed to have built a strong friendship with the latter much to Riker's surprise.

His wife was only too aware of the strain his worries about Troi put on him; he slept badly, was quick tempered and not at all his joyful self. Being a doctor herself and more importantly being the Chief Medical Officer, she had been sure she could get an explanation, but the clearance codes to access Troi's medical file flew way over her head. A talk with Beverly Crusher-Picard hadn't shed any light on the Ambassador's condition either and the entire situation began to get unsettling for her on both a professional and a personal level. It was time for an explanation.

~*+*~

"WOW!" Deanna whistled as her daughter came out of the bathroom. "And just where are you going?"

"Just having a drink in Ten-Forward."

"Ah-huh." Kyleigh wasn't a person who normally spent a lot of time on how she looked, but tonight was different. Her hair was completely loose and she had put a thin layer of make-up on her face. A look she didn't normally sport. "Must be someone special."

"He better be, this date was supposed to happen three days ago." She handed her mother a silver necklace and turned her back towards her. Deanna fastened the necklace and zipped up her daughter's dress. "Oh...well, remember; give him a chance to explain before killing him."

"Yes Mommy." Throwing her mother the most innocent smile she had Kyleigh stepped out their quarters and headed for Ten-Forward. Barely three steps into the corridor her mother's familiar presence wrapped itself around her and then withdrew as far as possible to give her daughter all the privacy she needed.

~*+*~

"Dea, you have to meditate." With her concern shining in her eyes Beverly placed her hand over Deanna's. "Please stay a bit longer."

"Dea, you're exhausted. You really have to meditate and get some sleep." Seeing the objection in the ambassador's eyes the doctor continued, "I can see it in your eyes. The negotiations have worn you out. You're even too tired to talk Standard." With a deep sigh Deanna agreed with her statement, "all right. I'll see you tomorrow then?" Beverly winked at her friend and then retreated from the room, hoping Deanna would indeed get some rest.

She got up from the couch and walked to her bedroom where she put on a black nightgown and a robe. She sat down in front of the mirror, picked up her brush and began to work the tangles out her long curls with slow, long strokes. She continued to brush until there wasn't a single tangle to be found. Ever since she was a little child brushing her hair helped her to calm down and to relax and she had made it a ritual to brush her hair before her daily meditation.

In the living area she lit the candles one by one and then kneeled down in the middle of the star she'd created. With her eyes closed she untied her robe and slid it off her shoulders. Inhaling the scent of the candle she concentrated on evening her breathing and then crossed her arms over her chest, resting each hand on the opposite shoulder. Her breathing had slowed so far her heart was beating at only half the normal rate.

Gradually she let down her mental blocks, or at least what was left of them and allowed the thoughts and feelings of those around her to freely flow through her mind; the meditation-ritual helped her seal her own thoughts and emotions and ignore those of others. The ritual allowed her to relax the part of her mind that kept her sane during the day. In her trance like state she didn't hear the chimes of the door the first time they rang, nor the second, or the times thereafter.