Shade: Alright then, it's time for Jerry Springer: Shade Style!!! This features some cool stuff... you'll find out about it
soon... anyway, read and review!
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! or Jerry Springer or FF7
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Jerry: Alright then. Now, Yumgi-
Yugi: Yugi.
Jerry: Ok then, now-
Shade: P*ss off Jerry! (punches Jerry. Jerry is knocked unconcious. Shade grabs the microphone)
Tea: Oh sh*t.
Shade: Now then, it's time for the CLOUD ROUND!!!
(everyone in the audience starts clapping)
Weevil: Cloud Round?
(Cloud is lowered just above the stage, attached to a rope)
Cloud: HELP ME!!!
Shade: Boys! Give our contestants the kendo sticks! (3 men in black come out and give Yugi, Tea and Weevil a kendo stick each)
Ok then, contestants. First one to dislocate his jaw is the winner! Blindfold them, boys! (3 men come out and blindfold Tea,
Yugi and Weevil) Now, contestants, break the pinata!
(they all start wildly bashing around, whacking various parts of Cloud)
Cloud: Ow! My pelvis!
(Yugi whacks Cloud in the knee)
Cloud: Argh! It hurts!
Shade: Yugi gets bonus points for dislocating Clouds knee! Keep whacking, contestants!
(they keep whacking. Cloud is now broken and bleeding. Tea finally gets his jaw)
Cloud: (blood pouring from mouth) ARGH!!!
Shade: Tea is the winner! (Yugi, Tea an Weevil take off their blindfolds)
Cloud: (being lifted away from the stage) Help me... kill me now...
Shade: Not yet Cloud! We have more in store for you!
Tea: Poor Cloud...
Shade: WHAT?!
Jess: (whispers to Tea) Simon has a thing about Cloud...
Tea: Umm... I hate Cloud...
Shade: (calms down) Good! Now it's time for Question Round! Yugi, for 10 points, what is my girlfriends job? Is she:
A) A dentist
B) A casino slut
C) A newsagency clerk
D) A Safeway employee?
Yugi: Umm... er... D?
Shade: Is that your final answer?
Yugi: Yep!
Shade: Is that your final answer?
Yugi: Uh huh!
Shade: IS THAT YOUR FINAL ANSWER?!
Yugi: Umm... no... A? (is stared down by Shade) C? (Shade is mad...) B! It's B! Stop hurting me!
Shade: I'm sorry, that answer is wrong. It was E, none of the above. PUNISHER!!!
(Yugi is whacked on the head by an angry man in an executioner suit)
Shade: Tea! Your question. It is a tricky one. Now, is the answer to this question:
A) C
B) A
C) D
D) B
Tea: Huh?
Shade: ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTION!!!
Tea: Umm... C?
Shade: So your answer is D.
Tea: No... A?
Shade: So your answer is C.
Tea: I give up! I give up! (breaks out in tears)
Shade: I'm sorry. The correct answer to that question was F) Who gives a sh*t? PUNISHER!!!
(the man in an executioner suit walks up and rams Tea up the arse)
Tea: Ow!
Shade: Thats enough, punisher.
(The Punisher walks off)
Weevil: My turn!
Shade: Yes! You get to play in the lightning round! (Weevil is zapped by lighting)
Weevil: Ow! (rubs himself) Man, I'm glad that lightning round is over- (gets zapped by lightning) Ow! Oh, I get it. I sure hope
there isn't a hot naked Amish chick round! (gets zapped by lightning) Ow! Curses...
Shade: Now it's time for the points. Yugi has 20 points...
Yugi: Yes!
Shade: Tea has 25 points...
Tea: Right on!
Shade: And Weevil has half a roast duck.
Half A Roast Duck: Quack.
Weevil: Half a roast duck?! What kind of a point system is this?!
Shade: A damn good one. This is the last round. It's time for the game Which Punishment Is The Most Painful!!! With our volunteer,
Cloud! (Cloud is dragged out)
Cloud: I'M NOT A VOLUNTEER!!! HELP ME!!!
Shade: Quiet you. Now, contestants, Cloud will be punished in 3 different ways. These ways are...
A) Being raped by several horny chicks with dicks
B) Being crushed by a smelly sandwich that weighs over 3 tonnes
C) Being forced to read one of Fades solo fics.
Now, pick the punishment!
Yugi: I choose punishment A, Shade.
Tea: I think punishment B, Simon.
Weevil: I think punishment Z, sneaky.
Shade: There is no punishment Z! PUNISHER!!! (the punisher drags Weevil to a place called 'Happy Bunny Land')
Weevil: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Shade: Ok then, lets punish that Cloud!
(Cloud is raped by several chicks with dicks)
Cloud: Argh!
Shade: Not all that bad of a scream...
(Cloud is crushed by a 3 tonne smelly sandwich)
Cloud: ARGH!!!
Shade: Ooh, bad luck Yugi. But the final punishment...
(Cloud is forced to read one of Fades solo fics)
Cloud: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- (Clouds head
explodes)
Shade: Well that was un-expected. Oh well. Join us next time! Next week: Seto, Mokuba and Fade duke it out to find out who the
most perverted piece of scum is! I think it might be Fade. Join us next time!
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Shade: Gotta love my work. Ok then, read and review and all that other ending stuff.
soon... anyway, read and review!
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! or Jerry Springer or FF7
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Jerry: Alright then. Now, Yumgi-
Yugi: Yugi.
Jerry: Ok then, now-
Shade: P*ss off Jerry! (punches Jerry. Jerry is knocked unconcious. Shade grabs the microphone)
Tea: Oh sh*t.
Shade: Now then, it's time for the CLOUD ROUND!!!
(everyone in the audience starts clapping)
Weevil: Cloud Round?
(Cloud is lowered just above the stage, attached to a rope)
Cloud: HELP ME!!!
Shade: Boys! Give our contestants the kendo sticks! (3 men in black come out and give Yugi, Tea and Weevil a kendo stick each)
Ok then, contestants. First one to dislocate his jaw is the winner! Blindfold them, boys! (3 men come out and blindfold Tea,
Yugi and Weevil) Now, contestants, break the pinata!
(they all start wildly bashing around, whacking various parts of Cloud)
Cloud: Ow! My pelvis!
(Yugi whacks Cloud in the knee)
Cloud: Argh! It hurts!
Shade: Yugi gets bonus points for dislocating Clouds knee! Keep whacking, contestants!
(they keep whacking. Cloud is now broken and bleeding. Tea finally gets his jaw)
Cloud: (blood pouring from mouth) ARGH!!!
Shade: Tea is the winner! (Yugi, Tea an Weevil take off their blindfolds)
Cloud: (being lifted away from the stage) Help me... kill me now...
Shade: Not yet Cloud! We have more in store for you!
Tea: Poor Cloud...
Shade: WHAT?!
Jess: (whispers to Tea) Simon has a thing about Cloud...
Tea: Umm... I hate Cloud...
Shade: (calms down) Good! Now it's time for Question Round! Yugi, for 10 points, what is my girlfriends job? Is she:
A) A dentist
B) A casino slut
C) A newsagency clerk
D) A Safeway employee?
Yugi: Umm... er... D?
Shade: Is that your final answer?
Yugi: Yep!
Shade: Is that your final answer?
Yugi: Uh huh!
Shade: IS THAT YOUR FINAL ANSWER?!
Yugi: Umm... no... A? (is stared down by Shade) C? (Shade is mad...) B! It's B! Stop hurting me!
Shade: I'm sorry, that answer is wrong. It was E, none of the above. PUNISHER!!!
(Yugi is whacked on the head by an angry man in an executioner suit)
Shade: Tea! Your question. It is a tricky one. Now, is the answer to this question:
A) C
B) A
C) D
D) B
Tea: Huh?
Shade: ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTION!!!
Tea: Umm... C?
Shade: So your answer is D.
Tea: No... A?
Shade: So your answer is C.
Tea: I give up! I give up! (breaks out in tears)
Shade: I'm sorry. The correct answer to that question was F) Who gives a sh*t? PUNISHER!!!
(the man in an executioner suit walks up and rams Tea up the arse)
Tea: Ow!
Shade: Thats enough, punisher.
(The Punisher walks off)
Weevil: My turn!
Shade: Yes! You get to play in the lightning round! (Weevil is zapped by lighting)
Weevil: Ow! (rubs himself) Man, I'm glad that lightning round is over- (gets zapped by lightning) Ow! Oh, I get it. I sure hope
there isn't a hot naked Amish chick round! (gets zapped by lightning) Ow! Curses...
Shade: Now it's time for the points. Yugi has 20 points...
Yugi: Yes!
Shade: Tea has 25 points...
Tea: Right on!
Shade: And Weevil has half a roast duck.
Half A Roast Duck: Quack.
Weevil: Half a roast duck?! What kind of a point system is this?!
Shade: A damn good one. This is the last round. It's time for the game Which Punishment Is The Most Painful!!! With our volunteer,
Cloud! (Cloud is dragged out)
Cloud: I'M NOT A VOLUNTEER!!! HELP ME!!!
Shade: Quiet you. Now, contestants, Cloud will be punished in 3 different ways. These ways are...
A) Being raped by several horny chicks with dicks
B) Being crushed by a smelly sandwich that weighs over 3 tonnes
C) Being forced to read one of Fades solo fics.
Now, pick the punishment!
Yugi: I choose punishment A, Shade.
Tea: I think punishment B, Simon.
Weevil: I think punishment Z, sneaky.
Shade: There is no punishment Z! PUNISHER!!! (the punisher drags Weevil to a place called 'Happy Bunny Land')
Weevil: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Shade: Ok then, lets punish that Cloud!
(Cloud is raped by several chicks with dicks)
Cloud: Argh!
Shade: Not all that bad of a scream...
(Cloud is crushed by a 3 tonne smelly sandwich)
Cloud: ARGH!!!
Shade: Ooh, bad luck Yugi. But the final punishment...
(Cloud is forced to read one of Fades solo fics)
Cloud: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- (Clouds head
explodes)
Shade: Well that was un-expected. Oh well. Join us next time! Next week: Seto, Mokuba and Fade duke it out to find out who the
most perverted piece of scum is! I think it might be Fade. Join us next time!
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Shade: Gotta love my work. Ok then, read and review and all that other ending stuff.