A FLUFF STORY…
(summary:pure fluff, badly written, read at your own risk)
Disclaimer: none of the characters are mine, only plot.
Peeves was on his usual nightly rounds of the Hogwarts Castle pulling down suits of armour, upsetting various articles and of course skillfully avoiding Filch and his viscious feline, Mrs. Norris.
As he rounded the corner of a corridor he noticed a small figure with pointy ears slip into the passage leading to the dormitories. Peeves smiled wickedly. A house-elf?, Peeves thought, well, well, well… I'm going to have some fun.
He flew into the passage and paused as he looked around. Where had that elf got to? He wondered. He turned to fly through the wall but instead banged into it, he tried again but was unable to make it. Puzzling over this he turned to the open end of the passage but found that he was trapped by an invisible barrier.
Hearing a sound Peeves turned and if he was alive he was sure he would have had a cardiac arrest and dropped dead on the spot.
Filch.
"I've got you now Peeves," he said menacingly.
Peeves continued to stare at him with wide eyes. He was supposed to be a squib! How did he…
Suddenly Filch collapsed on the floor.
Well, Peeves thought, I hope he's dying from the shock of finally catching me.
Bout to his great shock, he found the caretaker on the floor shaking with… laughter?!
Peeves continued to stare and was wondering if this could get any worse, there was a pop and in front of him lay the familiar little figure with pointed ears…
"PUCK!!"
The little pixie continued to shake with suppressed mirth while gasping out "You –(giggle)- should've seen-(giggle)- your face!"
But Peeves seemed to have forgotten all about that and flew to Puck's side. "I haven't seen you in nearly half a century! Have you thought of any new pranks?!"
Puck wiped his eyes, still giggling though in a much more controlled manner. "Hello Peeves, yes I have my bag of tricks with me and since I've been around here for two days I have found the exact people to use them on."
"So it was you who drew the moustache on the Fat Lady while she was sleeping!" Peeves said now sounding a little annoyed, "I was blamed for it! You owe me Puck!"
The little pixie waved his hand dismissively, "Those are trivial things Peeves, we have bigger fish to fry."
Forgetting his annoyance Peeves brightened, "Yes, yes tell me! Who are the poor victims?"
"Most certainly my dear friend," said Puck, "But first I have a little surprise to show you." He pulled out a bag full of arrows blood red in color. Peeves looked and frowned, "What are they?"
Puck's eyes shone with mischief and pride, "Cupid arrows, tomorrow's Valentine's Day."
"Where did you get them?" Peeves asked increduously, "You didn't steal them from Titania did you?" Puck nodded. Peeves looked at him with a newfound reverence.
"Now," he said in a conspiratoral tone, "Here's what I'm going to do…"
*****************************************************************
It was Christmas holidays and Hogwarts was almost empty except for a handful of students who had decided to remain.
Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, the twins, Lee Jordan and Katie Bell were making their way to the Quidditch field for practice accompanied by Colin Creevey.
Suddenly a girl with a long plait appeared around the curve of the corridor.
"Hello Padma," said Harry.
"Hello,"replied Padma, then looking around she added, "Hello Ron, where are you going?"
Hermione glared at her and the twins snickered while Ron looked decidedly uncomfortable.
"To the Quidditch field, for practice."
"How lovely," Padma cooed, "I think I'll join you,"
"What are you doing here Potter?"
They turned to see Snape and a group of Sytherin students, which consisted of Draco Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson, Millecent Blustrode, Crabbe and Goyle, emerge round the bend as well.
Harry's eyes narrowed, "Going for Quidditch practice."
Draco Malfoy snickered, "With Weasley as your new keeper I daresay you'll need it."
Hmmmm…Puck mused as he watched this exchange in his invisible form. Looks like it's time to act.
It's not fair to leave teachers out of the fun is it? He thought grinning wickedly, his eyes lingering on Snape. Now, he thought, the diversion…
The argument that would have ensued between the Gryffindors and the Slytherins was instantly silenced as Filch entered the corridor. The silence though lasted only a few seconds before it erupted into laughter.
Filch, dressed in a bright red frilly dress covered with bright pink hearts was prancing clumsily on bright orange heels singing at the top of his horrible voice,
"I looooove youuu, yooou loooooove meee, weee're oneee biiiig haaaappppyy faammilly……"
"Oh God," gasped Katie.
"Brilliant!" yelled George laughing.
"I've died and gone to heaven," said Fred, wiping is eyes, "where else could something this wonderful happen?"
Harry looked up in surprise, "You didn't do it?" he asked as he reached out to steady Ginny who nearly fell on the floor, but he was laughing so hard that he ended up on the floor with her.
"Much as we'd love to take credit for this, mate," said Fred, "it's not us."
"Peeves!" cried Filch gleefully catching sight of him as he came zooming by, "Come join me!"
The poltergiest zoomed towards Filch and started dancing the tango. This made the laughter even more impossible to stop as both of them continued singing, with Peeves inserting his own obscene lyrics as they danced.
Puck smiled. Yes, he thought, strike while the iron is hot.
He reached for his arrows. Pulling one out he aimed at a particular raven haired boy and a red haired girl.
Harry had just given Ginny his hand to help her up when he felt a warm feeling spread through him. It was something he'd never felt before. Feeling compelled to look at Ginny and found that he could not take his eyes away from her. She looked more beautiful than he had ever imagined. Her chocolate brown eyes were filled with laughter, her face slightly flushed, her hair acquiring various shades of red as it caught the sunlight through the windows.
It was darker than normal Weasley hair, Harry observed, a deeper shade closer to burgundy, how come he hadn't noticed it before?
Ginny felt Harry's gaze on her and blushed. She looked up startled as she felt his fingers stroke her hair. Her brown eyes widened as he moved closer and put his arms around her waist. "Ginny…" he breathed, his face inches from hers.
Harry was oblivious to everyone but Ginny. Ginny felt a rush inside her and felt bolder than she ever had in her entire lifetime. She daringly looked Harry in the eyes, putting her arms around his neck.
In one fluid movement, Harry closed his eyes, bent down and kissed her.
Hermione felt a rush of emotions inside her and turned her face towards Ron and found him looking at her. Hermione's heart thudded in her chest, how could she have denied it for so long? He had to be the one for her.
Nothing in the world could have prepared Ron for what happened next.
"Wow…" he breathed as she pulled away her hands entangled in his hair.
Suddenly a thought crossed his mind, "Hermione," he started, "I thought Krum.."
"Who?," she asked absentmindedly and pulled a wide eyed Ron down towards her.
That was when Puck attacked the Slytherin table. Draco Malfoy who was laughing hard suddenly stopped and looked over at the girl standing a little away from him. He'd never felt so much emotion all his life.
Draco left his chair and walked over to the girl, and turned her round to face him. Then to everyone's shock kissed her smack on the lips.
At that moment, he sprouted a long yellow tail, huge green ears and his robes turned a bright lemon yellow, his hair grew longer and turned bright pink.
The only people who didn't seem to notice this change were Draco and the girl in his arms, the girl being in a state of shock.
"Draco…?" she asked her eyes wide. He smiled.
"You're the one for me Millicent Blustrode."
The girl fainted.
The havoc and laughter that ensued was catastrophic.
Pansy Parkinson burst into tears, "Draco, how could you?" she cried, hitting him hard on the head.
Malfoy fell to his knees trying to revive Millicent, "My love," he said frantically shaking her, "Speak to me!!"
Pansy stood near him wailing at the top of her lungs, "HOW COULD YOU TWO-TIME ON ME?! I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR ONLY ONE!"
"Speak to me my dear Millie…."
"YOU INCONSIDERATE PRAT!"
"Wake up my love!"
"AFTER ALL THE TIME WE SPENT IN THOSE BROOM CUPBOARDS…!"
Padma Patil felt a warmth flow through her. she turned to Hermione and Ron, who were still in a liplock. Pulling Ron roughly away from Hermione, Padma attached herself to him. Ron was still in a daze to actually register this change.
"Hey!" said Hermione, trying to pry Ron away from Padma, "He's mine."
"No he's not!" said Padma, "He's mine!"
"He's mine!"
"No he's mine!"
"Mine!"
"Mine!"
"Mine!"
"MINE!"
Ron, who had just regained the use of his senses, looked at the two girls pulling him from both sides. At first he looked politely bewildered then his eyes widened as he realised what exactly they were aruing about…
"AARRGGHH!" Ron screamed as he ran screaming round the corridor. making those who were present (with the exception of those who were 'busy' with their respective patner) howl with a fresh burst of laughter.
Realising that their object of desire had suddenly disappeared both girls took off after him.
"Ronnie, come back!"
"Come back! Ronikinns you have to tell her you love me!"
"I TOLD you he loves ME!"
"He loves me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"ME!"
"ME!"
"AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
Katie Bell moved towards Lee Jordan, who on catching sight of her abruptly stopped laughing.
Lee swallowed. "Umm…Katie?" he asked in a strangled voice.
Locking her eyes in his she smiled. Lee felt his knees go weak. He had a feeling he knew what was coming. What's going on with these girls?
"Lee Jordan…" she said putting her arms around his neck as he tried to edge away, "did I ever tell you how good you are at Quidditch commentry?"
""Uh.. n-no," Lee stuttered desparately trying to distract himself by looking at Crabbe and Goyle who were dancing a jig.
It wasn't helping.
Katie had a very intense look an her face, "I was wondering if you were good at other things too?"
"Uh- what?" Lee felt people's eyes on the back of his neck and felt the heat rise to his face.
Katie pulled him closer, "Like this…" she said, closing her eyes…
Years later when Lee looked back he had to admit that it was the best kiss he'd ever gotten from a girl.
"AAAAARGGHHH!" Ron had re-entered the corridor.
Someone shouted. "Furunculus!" which was followed by a scream and a scuffle.
Sanpe who had been watching the chaos with a very sour expression, smiled slightly at the number of detentions he could now dole out.
"Silence!" he yelled, but there was so much noise and laughter that he hardly heard himself. This calls for drastic measures, he thought. He pointed his wand at his throat,
"Sonorus!"
Instantly his voice boomed through the narrow corridor, "SILENCE!" everything went deadly silent.
Puck chose this moment to aim.
If Snape thought he had brought about the silence then his next move was responsible for restoring it to its former state.
Snape felt a rush inside him…
"SYBIL, MY SWEET LITTLE OWL!"
Professor Trelawny had ben unfortunate enough to enter at precisely this moment.
"Severus…" she said her eyes widening at the sight of Snape's grinning face. For once in her life she regretted having the power to see into the future, she DID NOT want to see this. To add to her plight Snape's voice was still magically amplified.
Her owl like eyes widened even more, as she watched him stride towards her.
Knowing what was coming she tried to run but Snape was too quick for her. He grabbed her to him and pressed his lips to hers.
"Enough!" yelled George, "I can't stand it!"
"Malfoy… Blustrode! Snape… Trelawny!Too much!" said Fred doubling over with laughter.
It didn't help when Snape started quoting Shakespeare's 'Sonnets'.
"IN TENDER EMBASSY OF LOVE TO THEE, MY LIFE…"
Trelawnly fled with Snape chasing after her, his voice resounding in the corridors.
"WHEN SPARKLING STARS TWIRE NOT THOU GILDE'ST THE EVEN…"
Peeves was zooming around and looked over the moon. Puck aimed another arrow.
"PUCK!"
He froze. "Uh oh.."
Titania stormed up to him and pulled him sharply by the ear, "Did you steal my arrows?" she asked in a dangerous voice. Puck quailed under her glare.
"My dear Queen, just helping these poor children realise their feelings…"
"UNDO IT THIS INSTANT!!"
"Yes your majesty," Puck said pouting, turning to the crowd he snapped his fingers.
If the situation in the Hall was bad, then what followed was even worse.
"AAAAAAHHHHHH!"
"OMIGOD! HARRY!"
"GET AWAY FROM ME BLUSTRODE!"
"Draco darling, don't go!"
"I HAVE A TAIL!!! AAAAAAARGGGGGGGHHH!!"
"LEE?!? AAAAAAHHHHHH!"
"SHOULD HAVE SEEN…YOUR FACE…HAR! HAR!"
"SHUT UP!"
"Yellow… nylon…too bright…allergic…AAAHHHHHH!"
"GINNY!"
"HARRY! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? GET AWAY FROM MY SISTER!"
"Hermione I didn't really mean to hex you…"
"SYBIL! I'M SO SORRY! I… OH…Quietus…"
"RON, listen to me…"
"I don't want to hear ANYTHING!"
"….DON'T KNOW WHAT CAME OVER ME LEE!"
"Katie calm down!"
"Pansy, please let me just exp…OW!"
"THAT'S IT DRACO YOU AND I ARE THROUGH!"
"Christ! Lee I'm really sorry…"
"KATIE CALM DOWN!"
"DRACO YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME!"
"Pansy, sweetheart! Cupcakes! Please listen…"
"Ginny WAIT!"
*Snap* *Snap*
"Get that camera out of my face Creevey!"
*Snap*
"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
"Hermione, I'm really sorry…"
"Oi! Colin! I need a copy of Malfoy's photos for keepsake!"
"SHUT UP! Creevey, IMGONNAKILLYOU!!!"
"RON WILL YOU PLEASE LISTEN…"
"It's a simple furunculus hex Hermione, I swear I can fix it…"
"LET GO OF ME!"
Puck smiled as he was dragged away by Titania. It won't end, he thought, he knew exactly the people who would faithfully carry on his work. He snapped his fingers.
Later in the evening as Fred and George were up in their dormitory, George noticed a lump under his covers. "What's this?" he asked picking up the bag.
Fred examined it closely, "No idea. What do all these little red arrows do? Explosives?"
"Nah, reminds me of Cupid's arrows?" said George sniggering.
Fred looked at George, who's eyes widened, "You don't think…?" he said.
"We'll test it!"
*******************************************************************
Five minutes later, Ron entered the common room…
"HARRY! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING SNOGGING MY SISTER!"