For Your Sake – Lily and James
By Green Eyed Lily
[A/N: New fic! No one reviewed my previous one, and I was really disappointed, but hopefully this one will fare better. It's been almost a year since I last wrote on ffn.net and I have a good reason – lots has been happening this year. Anyway, I hope you like the beginning of this story. I'll update soon, promise! I really tried to make this one longer than my other chapters in other fics. Read, review, and have fun!]
Lily Evans stood in front of her mirror, smiling. Her hair looked good today. It hung slightly below her shoulder, a dark red, in poetic waves, looking shiny, clean, and healthy. It didn't look scraggly and worn as it had for the past couple of days while she had been ill. It looked fresh and smelled fresh too. Her face, although not back yet to its usual pallor, was no longer tinted the sickening pale yellow that her fever had given her for many nights. Her eyes were bright, reflecting a lot of light from her mirror. They looked back at her in a smooth, clear cucumber green. Her eyes were kind of spooky. Look at them in the sunlight, and you would notice a pale ring of yellows and browns around her pupil. She had unusual eyes, that was for sure. But she liked them. It gave her personality. She put on a light green tee shirt over her black jeans, then slipped on her Hogwarts robes. The green set off her eyes nicely, and made her hair look strikingly bright.
For the first time in her life, Lily Evans felt beautiful.
She walked down the spiraling staircase, and waited near the portrait hole for Kassiera Willowthright. Kas was her best friend, although she had several character traits that often made her seem otherwise. Punctuality was one of them. Kas was NEVER on time. Lily had tried to get her time and again to wear a watch, but Kas just never would listen to her. As her thoughts wandered, Lily felt a shadow drift across her face. Kas stood in front of her, books in hand. Lily smiled at her, and they set off across the portrait hole.
Kas Willowthright was an exotic girl. She had dark, dark brown hair that seemed black most of the time. Calm blue eyes and a light dose of freckles characterized her face. Kas seemed more mature than everyone else in the fifth year, Lily had often thought. She seemed more grown up; she seemed wiser, even though her grades didn't always prove that. Boys drooled after Kas. They loved her looks – indeed, it was only her looks that drew her to their attention. Some of them took her out on dates – but left her as friends. They couldn't match up to her maturity. She made them feel inadequate, somehow. Kas was an enigma in herself.
Lily, on the other hand, was an enigma too, although in a different way. People sought her out whenever they needed someone to talk to. She was always a friendly ear. She was not overly loud, not overly quiet. She was smart – she got the highest marks in most of her classes. She was pleasant to most people. She could start a conversation with almost anybody, and had something in common with almost everyone. But Lily Evans had a secret that plagued her, and no one knew what it was. It nestled within her quietly. She never hinted at it or yelled it out. She never admitted that she had a secret, but somehow, everybody knew. There was something about Lily that pricked their hearts.
James Potter wanted to find out what it was.
James Potter often felt as though he was looking at a mirror when he looked at Lily Evans. They were so alike that it was uncanny. They had the same interests. They both liked Quidditch, they both liked the magical author Q. U. I. L. Lizardby, and they both liked the same types of foods, seasons, flowers, colors, and so on. They were oddly alike.
James Potter, too, had a secret. No one knew what it was, except for his best friend, Sirius Black. Sirius and James were the pranksters of the school – although no one would know it, looking at their perfect marks. They roamed Hogwarts, terrorizing Slytherins, acting like the Robin Hoods of the school. Teachers chuckled at their antics, students encouraged them on, and all in all, they lived a charmed life.
James was walking down the Corridor of the Three-Eared Statue, looking for the Transfiguration textbook that he was sure he had dropped somewhere nearby. Concrete pillars lined the open corridor. James liked this corridor. He liked how there were no walls, except for the pillars. The breeze blew in, and even though there was sunlight cast on his face, he shivered. A wave of whimsy seemed to pass over him; an odd feeling, something he couldn't quite put his finger on. He kept walking. It was late in the evening, with another hour of daylight to go. He could see someone practicing Quidditch out in the mini-courtyard. He squinted, trying to look closer. The person was a natural. He or she, whoever it was, flew in between and around the massive gargoyles surrounding the wall. He studied the person's moves for a minute, and realized who it reminded him of. Lily Evans. James, being on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, knew the most distinguishing characteristics of the players. Each player had a particular style. Lily's style was a pleasure to behold. She flew freely, airily, with a reassuring confidence. She flew as though she was flying to please herself. She flew like a bird; she flew gracefully. She was multi-faceted. Sometimes she would fly in a wild, crazy, fun-loving manner. At other times, she would fly slowly, carefully, moodily. She flew according to her mood. Today, James thought, she was flying for herself.
Her hair flew behind her in a windy, tangled mess. James liked that. He liked it when a girl felt free enough to fly around without worrying about what her hair looked like. But then, he thought, Lily hardly acted like other girls. He knew her pretty well, he thought. She usually dressed in jeans, and always opted for comfort over style. She never flirted or batted her eyelashes like countless other girls did. She never threw herself on them. James knew plenty about those types of girls – they lived a gossipy, social-bird life. Their sole aim was to sink their hooks into the cutest guys in Hogwarts. They were empty, brainless shells.
Lily wasn't like that. She radiated confidence. Look at her, and you would think that she knew something that no one else did. She seemed to glow, in James' eyes.
Potter, he asked himself, are you developing a crush on Lily Evans?
Kas Willowthright chuckled as Lily Evans pestered her to tell her about her latest crush.
"I think it's serious this time, Lil," she exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear. She was smiling so hard that it looked like her face might crack into two any second.
Lily grinned back at her friend.
"Well, tell me who he is, so I know who's making you so happy. C'mon, tell me Kas!"
"Okay, okay," Kas laughed. "I guess I have to. You are my best friend, after all. Okay. It's James Potter," she said, biting her lip, trying to contain a smile.
Lily's eyes widened.
"Potter? Wow…Kas, I really would never have guessed. He's practically unreachable, though!"
Kas nodded, the flicker in her eyes dimmed for a moment.
"I know!!" she groaned, flopping over on her bed, hugging her pillow. "Lil, do you think I have any chance at all with him? Tell me honestly."
Lily recognized uncertainty when she saw it. She leaned forward, her eyes sincere. "Kas Willowthright, make the right moves and James Potter will be gaga over you in no time!"
Kas hugged Lily, and the two girls laughed to themselves.
"Lily! Lily, wait up!" called the unmistakable voice of Jacob Mullmead. Lily groaned to herself. She forced herself to be polite, and looked back. Jacob was jogging towards her, a big smile on his face. He caught up to her, and starting walking alongside.
"Lily, want me to hold your books?" he asked, a huge grin on his face. Blond hair flopped over his face and ears.
"No thanks, Jacob. I'm fine," she replied, trying not to sound too cold. She couldn't help feeling the way she did – Jacob truly was such a bother. He had been after her for the past three months – despite her continuous insistence that she was not ready for a relationship. He had taken to following her around whenever he saw her, offering to carry her books or help her service her broomstick. Honestly, she thought to herself, you shouldn't be so nice. Be rude just once, and he'll leave you alone! But try as she might to counsel herself, Lily didn't have the heart to break Jacob's heart. It was then that she saw James Potter climbing down the staircase.
She was confused. According to Kas (who had practically memorized James' daily schedule), James should be in the Common room right now. She frowned to herself. Poor Kas' first plan to get James was going down the drain.
Jacob's voice broke into Lily's thoughts.
"Are you going to Transfiguration Lily? Huh?" he asked. She sighed.
"Back to my Common Room, Jacob," she replied. He gave a disappointed sigh – Jacob was a Hufflepuff. He eagerly said goodbye to her, stood in front of her for a minute, uncertainly, and then ran down the corridor. She shook her head in relief.
"Mullmead's still after you, huh Lily?" she heard a voice ask. James Potter stepped in line with her. His hair flopped down over his ears, and his eyes, a sincere mahogany brown, smiled at her. She nodded.
"I feel your pain," he continued. "Veronica Sparrowart's had her nails into me all week!"
Lily chuckled, warming up to the conversation. They walked up to the Common Room, chatting amicably. They parted near the staircase.
Lily found Kas lying in bed, reading.
"Kas? Are you alright?" she asked. Kas looked up at Lily and let out a sigh.
"I waited forever, and he didn't turn up!" she said, dropping her book down beside her.
Lily felt oddly guilty, as though she had been cheating on her best friend. But I wasn't, she told herself. I was just chatting with James. Just as a friend.
"I saw him down near the Transfiguration Corridor," she replied, trying to sound casual. Kas sighed and flopped down onto her pillows. Lily smiled at her, trying to reassure her.
"Kas Willowthright, get up and haul your body over to lunch. Who knows, you might see lover-boy there!"
They headed down to lunch.
Meanwhile, Sirius Black was unsuccessfully grilling his best friend.
"So, who's that redhead you were walking down the corridor with?" he asked, trying desperately to hide his curiosity.
"Who? Oh-her. Lily Evans." James replied, carelessly spooning some pudding onto his plate.
"Lily Evans, huh? So what's going on, Prongs?" Sirius asked.
James let out an exaggerated sigh.
"Si-ri-us. I was just talking to her. Can't a guy have some conversation in peace?"
Remus, who had been listening, offered his opinion.
"Lily's a nice girl."
Sirius sat down with a look of dismay.
"So how come everyone knows her except for me?"
"Maybe because you're so thick? She sits in front of you in DADA!" James said, stuffing his mouth with a cookie.
"She DOES? I gotta get her attention, then!" Sirius exclaimed, his mind totally off food.
"Sirius Black," James asked carefully. "Are you falling for Lily Evans?"
Sirius contemplated for a moment.
"Nah. I dunno. Maybe. Possibly. Probably."
As Sirius continued to speculate, James felt an odd feeling overpower his mind. Jealousy? He asked himself. James Potter, are you jealous of your best friend? Perhaps, he answered himself. Despite his fame, James was a bit uncertain inside. He was serious about Lily, but didn't feel certain about telling her about it. Sirius, on the other hand, was wild and crazy. He would probably appeal to Lily with his joking attitude and rakish charm. It would be easy for Sirius to get Lily, James thought. If only I could.
Meanwhile, Lily was tossing and turning in her bed. The smooth silk curtains on her side brushed against her face, tickling her. With a sigh, she slipped out of bed, and walked down the staircases to a window on the side of the Common room. A half moon dimly illuminated the sky, shining on the tops of the tall, majestic trees of the Hogwart's grounds. In the distance, she could see the clear water of the lake rippling. She opened the window slightly, and a gently cold breeze wafted through, making her shiver in her thin nightgown. Ringlets of her hair drifted around her, and the breeze calmed her, lulling her to sleep. Curling up on the oversized window sill, Lily Evans went to sleep.
When James came down that night to retrieve the remains of his Transfiguration textbook from the couch, he saw a silhouette of a girl, curled up by the window. He saw the outline of her body against the grayish-white of the night outside. A breeze wafted into the room, enveloping his body in a delicious sensation. He took a deep breath of it, and climbed back up into his bed, where he fell asleep immediately.
When James came down early the next morning, broom in hand for Quidditch practice, he checked on the window to see if the girl was still sleeping there. To his surprise, he saw Lily there, her cheek resting against the cool window pane, her hair fluttering from the mellow dawn wind. During the course of the night, the hem of her nightgown had made its way up to her knees, revealing slender yet sturdy legs. She looked so peaceful and innocent there that James almost wanted to…kiss her. He leaned forward, looking at her lips, wishing, hoping…
Suddenly she stirred, her leg sliding down. He straightened himself and tried to look casual. With a start, she opened her eyes, and immediately sat up straight. He smiled.
"Good morning," he whispered, unwilling to break the silence of the morning. She looked back at him, green eyes wide, suddenly aware of the precarious position of her nightgown. Then she yawned, trying unsuccessfully to cover it up. James grinned.
"Had a nice night?" he asked, offering her a hand down from the windowsill, although she really didn't need it.
'Yes, thanks. I must have dozed off without realizing it," she said, hoisting herself up with his hand. As she stood, he noticed her hair tumbling down her shoulders and neck. She looked up at him and smiled.
"Thanks. Good thing no one else saw me," she said with a little a laugh, straightening her nightgown. "I'll…see you later then."
He forced himself to get a move on, and nodded. He walked over to the portrait hole, broom in hand, and then looked back, as she ascended the staircase quickly, her small white feet padding up the stairs.
He climbed out of the portrait hole with a wistful longing in his heart.
He saw her later at Quidditch Practice. He was flying around the field, waiting for the Captain to show up, when he saw her walk out into the field with her broom in hand. She had just showered, he noticed, and her cheeks glowed slightly, tinged a faint red. Her hair streamed down her back, red as fire in a sea of grey. In her scarlet Quidditch robes, she looked as colorful as a rainbow on a stormy night.
She flew up easily, stretching and curving, making sharp turns as if to ease herself into the motion. Then, in straight, fluid motions, she made her way by his side. Together they flew, side by side, stretching their limits, flying high above the grounds.
As if by unspoken agreement, they both headed towards the main roof of the castle. Disfigured gargoyles and heavy stone turrets adorned the sides of the roof, and in the middle lay a flat, smooth surface. They landed there simultaneously, and hopped off their brooms.
It was then that Lily was sure she had lost her mind. She found herself walking closer to James, as if a magical current was forcing her forward. To her surprise and horror, she found that she wanted to be closer to him. Her hair drifted about her face as the wind blew.
In James opinion, he had lost his mind. When he saw Lily walking towards him, a million thoughts flew out of his head, and he stood there, empty, unsure of what to do. Then, quite suddenly, he gently pulled her closer by her waist, and planted a soft kiss on her lips.
A raven croaked in the distance. As if they had both seen the same premonition, they sprang apart, faces red and flustered. Lily's first thought was to run away, and James' first thought was to stop her. For a couple of seconds, neither followed their instincts, but instead stood staring at their toes.
Then Lily flew away.
Two days later, Sirius Black was fiddling with her hair in DADA class. She turned around, a look of impatience on her face.
"Sirius…" she groaned, swatting his hand away, trying not to look James in the eye, as he sat beside Sirius.
[A/N: I know it seems like an odd place to end the fic, but don't worry, I'll get the next chapter out soon! Providing people actually care to read it, that is. Please review! Your comments really help me decide what to write next. Thanks! Love, Green Eyed Lily]