Disclaimer: Do I really have to say it every time? All of the characters, etc. belong to Joss and Mutant Enemy. Only Simon and Jessica are mine.
Sorry it's taken so long for this chapter – I've been getting married, then going away on honeymoon and I've just started rehearsals for an amateur panto production, so forgive me if it takes a bit longer to get the rest of the story up.
This is kind of a fill-in chapter while I work out where I'm going. Sorry
Please keep the reviews coming – you've all been really nice about this fic, so I might try another when this one's done.
BTW, please ask my permission when it comes to distribution – I'll have to think about it. I'm a bit shy.
Illusions
Spike glanced around. There wasn't any cover.
"Harris, get on the phone."
"Already way ahead of you, pal," Xander backed up slowly, the phone to his ear.
"Tell her to meet us in front of the east gate." Spike reached into his duster pocket and took out a stake. The vampires were gaining on them, taking their time and gauging the lay of the land before they attacked. The lady's got brains, he thought to himself. Behind him, Xander had relayed the message to Buffy and was standing ready, a stake in one hand and a small axe in the other.
"What now?"
Spike glanced over his shoulder at Xander, "Now, we run."
"What?"
"Make sure they can see you, don't get too far ahead of them," Spike said, starting to back up.
"Great; we're the bait," Xander turned and shouted back over his shoulder as he started to run, "I hate this!"
Buffy and Dawn were waiting behind a tree near the east gate when Giles and Willow arrived, out of breath. Buffy signalled towards a patch of bushes opposite her position and they dropped out of sight behind them just as Xander sprinted around the corner. Spike was close behind him. He glanced around, spotted the others and turned to face the vampires. Jessica was first to reach them. She pulled up a distance away from him and watched, her head on one side. When her company arrived, she stopped them. She moved forward slowly, her eyes darting around.
"An ambush?" she smiled, "Oooh good, I like a fight."
Spike shrugged and launched himself at her. She ducked under his first blow, blocked the next and backhanded him hard. Buffy and Dawn were already halfway there before the other vampires realised what was going on. A crossbow bolt whistled past Xander's ear and he glanced back to see Willow on her feet, trying to re-load. Jessica had moved away and Spike was being held by one of the bigger vampires, another one punching him repeatedly. Dawn was trying to fight her way through to him, deflecting attacks as best she could. Buffy staked one vamp as she moved over to Giles. He swung his sword, taking off his opponent's head and turned to her.
"Back up Xander; I'll go with Dawn," Buffy told him, spinning around and kicking another attacker. Giles nodded and ran to Xander's side, swinging the sword at any vamp that came near them. Buffy punched one in the face and brought her stake down hard. She ran through the dust as it spread, towards her sister, who was struggling with another vampire. He had both her wrists in his hands and was bending her back. Buffy staked him viciously in the back. Dawn smiled tightly in thanks and looked over to Spike. He threw his head back, smashing it into the vampire's face, then spun and punched him hard. The other one kicked him in the face and he fell back down again, the stake flying from his hand. He looked up and saw the vamp coming towards him again. Spike threw himself to the side, feeling something hit him in the side as he rolled away from the attack. Rolling back, he saw Dawn spin his opponent around and stake him. Buffy had just finished off the other one. Pulling himself up, he saw Xander on top of another vamp, holding her down, while Giles took her head off with his broadsword. Willow fired her crossbow again and the last vampire burst into dust. Everyone looked around, checking for more.
"Where's the leader?" Giles asked. Buffy spun round, searching for her.
"Did anyone get her?" Dawn asked.
"I had her for a couple of seconds, but she left me to her pals. Didn't see her after that," Spike said, getting to his feet. He felt strangely dizzy. Dawn was staring at him, "What?"
"You're bleeding," she whispered. Spike looked down. There was blood on his shirt, the material sticking to his body. He moved his duster to the side and saw his own stake sticking out of him, just below the ribs.
"Bugger," he said, as his legs slowly gave way under him and he collapsed back to the ground.
Dawn dropped to her knees next to him and took hold of the stake. Spike grabbed her wrist to stop her.
"Leave it for now, bit."
"But we've got to get it out of you."
"Just wait a sec, OK?" Buffy told her, "Will, can you have a look at that? See what you can do?"
"Stop fussing," Spike complained, "I've had worse than this before, you know."
"You weren't human before," Buffy reminded him, "so just lie back and think of England. Willow and Dawn can look after you. We need to go and look for that vamp."
Willow handed the crossbow to Xander and watched as they headed off into the cemetery. She knelt down next to Dawn and lifted Spike's shirt as gently as she could.
"He's losing a lot of blood right now, but I don't see any bubbles, so I don't think it punctured the lung. We need to stop the bleeding. Dawnie, make a pad out of something."
"Use my shirt; it's got enough blood on it already," Spike told them.
They helped him get his shirt off and put his duster back on. Dawn was starting to look a little queasy as she watched Willow inspecting the wound.
"OK, now we're going to have to take out the stake. Dawnie, I want you to be ready to press down as hard as you can as soon as I take it out." She looked up at Spike, "This is going to hurt." He nodded. Willow got a good grip on the stake. "After three. One, two, three."
She pulled the stake, twisting it slightly and Dawn leaned on him heavily, her hands pressing on the padded up shirt and her face white.
"Jesus!" he yelled, "Christ, Red! Bloody hell, that hurts!"
Willow was taking her belt off and trying to slip it under him. She tightened it up around him to hold the makeshift pad in place and sat back. Spike was breathing heavily and his skin was clammy. Dawn wrapped his duster tighter around him and stood up to take off her jacket, placing it gently over him to try and keep him warm.
"Over there," Giles pointed into the dark, "Through those trees."
They made their way over to the shape on the ground. It was a young man, perhaps in his twenties, blank eyes staring up at the stars. Under his arm, they could see the blood used to hastily draw the symbol. Giles sighed.
"What now?" Buffy asked.
"I have no idea," he replied gently, bending down and closing the victim's eyes.
"What?" Xander demanded, "You're a Watcher; you're supposed to know these things."
"Wait! The Horsemen are vampires, right? So we make sure this one doesn't come back and there's only three Horsemen."
Giles turned slowly towards Buffy, a look of realisation on his face. "And with only three, the Apocalypse cannot take place. Revelations is very clear on that point. Help me move the body."
Buffy and Xander picked up the young man and moved him to one side, while Giles fumbled around in his bag, bringing out a large bottle. He poured the contents liberally over the symbol and they watched the fresh blood washing away down the slope. Giles knelt and scrubbed at the grass with his jacket, removing as much of the traces as he could.
"What was that?" Xander asked.
"Holy water. Just to be on the safe side," Giles replied, picking up his sword again. Buffy stood over the body.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, and brought a stake down hard into the corpse's chest. She stepped back and Giles swung the sword down, severing the head from the body. Xander looked away.
"It's OK, there's hardly any blood. He's been drained, remember?" Buffy looked down at the remains, "We should bury him."
Giles nodded, "Yes. We'll bury the body at one end of the cemetery and the head at the other. Xander, I think you had better go and get your car whilst we take care of this. We need to get Spike home and patched up properly."
Xander nodded and headed towards the nearest gate, still holding the crossbow ready, just in case. Buffy bent and took the body under the arms.
"We won't be able to bury this now, so we'll hide it and come back later with a couple of shovels."
Giles picked up the head gingerly and started towards the other end of the graveyard.
"Have you lot ever thought it might be easier to have some first aid stuff in one of your bags of equipment?" Spike asked. His voice sounded faint to him, and the words were slurring a little, but he kept talking just to keep his mind on something. "I mean after all these years of fighting the forces of darkness, you would've thought one of you would have said 'Oh look, I'm bleeding again; maybe I should be carrying some basic medical supplies with me?'"
Dawn and Willow smiled slightly.
"Be quiet and behave yourself," Dawn told him."
He lay back again. He knew better than to argue with a Summers.
"We should call 911."
Willow shook her head, "We can't take him to a hospital. He hasn't got any ID, we don't have a decent explanation for this and we're still not sure… " Her voice trailed off.
"Not sure if I'm totally human," Spike finished for her. She blushed.
"I'm sorry. I just meant, we don't know if you've still got those awkward-to-explain vampire healing abilities"
"Well, OK. But we have to get him home soon and fix him up," Dawn smiled at him, "I'm not going to let you bleed to death in a cemetery."
"Thanks niblet," he smiled back at her. Then he passed out.
Buffy got back to them just as Xander pulled up at the gate in his car. Willow looked up at Buffy.
"He's still bleeding."
"We should've called 911," Dawn told them.
"Let's just get him to the car," Buffy crouched down next to him and stroked his cheek gently, "Willow, you make sure that pad doesn't move. Xander and I will lift him. OK?"
Giles jogged up to them, slightly out of breath.
"How is he?"
"We have to get him home fast," Buffy told him.
They managed to lift him gently and get him to the car, where they laid him across the back seat.
"We'll meet you back there," Giles told Buffy as she got into the passenger seat. She nodded and closed the door.
"Promise to a lady," Spike muttered behind her and she turned to look at him. She hadn't seen him in such a bad way since Glory, but he had been a vampire then. Now he was human and he could die.
"Drive fast," she told Xander.
Between them, they managed to get Spike upstairs and laid him on Buffy's bed. When the others arrived, Buffy was emerging from the bathroom with her hands full of dressings. Dawn raced up the stairs.
By the time her sister got in the room, Buffy was undoing the belt and discarding the shirt. There was already blood on the bed sheets.
"…hurt the one you love," Spike sighed gently.
Buffy was cleaning the wound quickly, pouring the antiseptic into it and around it, as she tried to wipe away the blood.
"I think he's stopped bleeding for the moment. Dawn, go and get some super glue."
"What? Do you even know what you're doing?"
Buffy glanced up at her. "I saw it in a film. We'll use the glue to hold the edges together, then we'll bandage it up tight and hope it holds."
"And if it doesn't?"
"Then we make up a story and take him to a hospital."
Dawn got up and headed for the door.
"Do you really know what you're doing?" Willow asked Buffy gently when she had gone.
"I hope so. Dawn was right; we should've called an ambulance, but it's too late now." Buffy sighed, "Spike's got a hole in him and we've gotta do something."
Dawn raced back in and threw herself down next to her sister, holding out the small tube of glue. Buffy took it.
"OK. You hold the edges together, I'll glue it. Willow, you go and get some of those little butterfly bandage things and some more dressings from the bathroom." She glanced down at Dawn, "Ready?"
Spike fought his way through to consciousness, his mind still surrounded by fog. His body ached dully. He forced his eyes open and looked around, the room swimming in front of him. He tried to sit up, but fell back again as the pain stabbed through his side.
"Bollocks," he muttered to himself.
"You'd better lie still; you don't want it coming open again," Buffy was standing in the door way with a glass in her hand. She came over and sat next to the bed.
"How long have I been out?" he asked, taking the offered glass.
"Most of the night; it's almost morning. Giles and Xander have just got back from burying the body we found."
Spike raised his eyes questioningly as he drained the water. Buffy settled back in the chair and explained what had happened after they had left to get the vamp, explaining that they had made sure the latest victim would not rise.
"And seeing as the Apocalypse is supposed to start tonight, I don't think we're all gonna disappear into the Hellmouth just yet."
Spike nodded.
"What's the matter with you? You got that broody thing going again." Buffy asked.
"I let you down. I should've got that bitch vamp when I had the chance. Jumpin' in there like I was still immortal was stupid. You must think I'm a right poof, passing out like that." Spike dropped his gaze.
Buffy stopped herself smiling, "None of us do. You lost a lot of blood and you'd taken a pounding from those vampires. No-one thinks you're a poof." She took the glass from him and put it on the table, "Except Xander."
"Oh, yeah; right. Bit of sympathy here, love." Spike smiled. Buffy got up and pulled the sheets to the side.
"Now let's have a look at that dressing. I might have to change it." She sat on the edge of the bed and bent to gently peel back the edge of the dressing, her hair swinging down and brushing against his arm. He wanted to touch it, to push it back behind her ear, feel it soft and fine in his hand. He moved his arm away. Buffy pulled a little more of the dressing off and took a closer look at the wound. Unconsciously, she rested her hand on his stomach as she leaned forward. He could feel her gentle breathing on his skin.
"Well, it looks like you still have some of that vampire healing thing going. It's not as quick as it used to be, but it's as least as good as me, " Buffy looked up at him. He had a strange look on his face. "What?"
He shook his head, "Nothing. Just, could you… I mean…," he trailed off and gestured at her hand, still resting familiarly on his skin.
Slowly, Buffy moved her hand. She sighed, "I thought you were over that."
"No," he said quietly, "Not yet."
There was a pause. Spike didn't look up at her. He wasn't sure if he could right now. It had been so comfortable, so close. That was why he had to pull back, to make himself distant from her.
"Spike, I know this is difficult, but that's because your soul is still all new and shiny." Buffy cleared her throat, "But it will get easier. One day, you'll be able to forgive yourself."
"How do you people live with this?"
"I don't know. It's just a part of you and you'll get used to it, just like you got used to losing it, or getting that chip. You'll adapt. I know you; you always do." Buffy took his hand, "Hey, you're doing better than some humans. There are a lot of people out there who just ignore their soul and don't let it talk to them. I just hope you don't turn into one of those. I know it hurts, but I hope your soul stays shiny and new."
He looked up at her, frowning, "Why? Why would you want me to suffer?"
"I don't want you to suffer. It's just that… I think that… I mean, with your soul, I think… I could love you one day." Buffy couldn't look at him, so she concentrated on their hands. Spike didn't speak; he wasn't sure if he was breathing, his chest suddenly felt tight and heavy and his mind was blank. Say something, you prat, he told himself, don't just sit there like a pillock; say something.
"Oh," he said when he could breathe again. Buffy started to laugh.
"What?"
"I've just never seen you speechless before," she giggled.
"Oh, charming." He reached out and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear, smiling at her, "Thank you."
She put her hand over his as it brushed her cheek and smiled back, her beautiful eyes still sparkling at him. Then, she was leaning towards him and her lips were on his, gently brushing them at first, then more forceful, more insistent. He kissed her back, his hands moving to her shoulders and pulling her closer on the bed. Buffy could feel his warm flesh pressing against her through her shirt and marvelled at the touch of it; he was human, he was alive. Spike shifted his body and pulled her on top of him as he lay back. She moaned softly.
Giles tactfully cleared his throat, "Er… Buffy?"
Buffy tried to sit up, but only managed to press her hand against Spike's injured side. He yelled in pain and she slipped off the side of the bed, hitting the floor with a loud thump. Spike groaned and held his side. Buffy bounced to her feet.
"Hi Giles."
"Erm, yes. Er… could you come down and have a word with your sister?" Predictably, Giles was polishing his glasses, "I felt she should get some rest as she has been up all night and she is refusing to go to bed. She says she wants to check on Spike."
Spike swung his legs off the bed, wincing slightly, "I'll talk to her." He stood up slowly and glanced around the room, "D'you have a shirt I could borrow?"
"If you fit into one of my shirts, I'll kill myself," Buffy went over to the set of drawers, "You can borrow a t-shirt." She tossed one over to him and went to the door. "I'll go and have a word with my teenage sister. See you down there."
When she had gone, Giles turned to Spike and replaced his glasses.
"Just so that you know; if you hurt her, I will hurt you."
Spike pulled the shirt over his head, Buffy's scent surrounding him. He met the Watcher's gaze. He nodded.
"I know." He went to the door and slid past Giles, "Let's go and sort out the little bit."
The door flew open and slammed hard against the wall, plaster falling to the filthy floor. Simon looked up at his sister framed in the doorway, her face a picture of rage, her hands uncurling and curling into fists.
"It's over." Her voice was dangerously low.
"What do you mean?" Simon stood and faced her, his heart pounding.
"They found the body. The Slayer and her gang found him. We've failed, brother."
Simon turned away. He knew he was expendable now. Jessica hadn't been able to kill him when she first turned, but she had changed recently. The taste of power had turned her again; turned her into something he didn't recognise and couldn't control. His baby sister was finally dead. He turned back to her and watched her face, once so beautiful to him, twisted in fury as she picked up a chair and smashed it against the wall. She screamed.
"I wanted a war, Simon. You were supposed to give me a war!" She slumped against the wall, suddenly calm. "I wanted chaos."
Pushing herself away from the plaster, she seemed to reach a decision.
"If you can't give me an Apocalypse, I'll have to make my own fun. I'm going to sleep now and you'd better be here when I wake up. We're going to make some mischief tonight."
Simon watched her go, the pain in his chest swelling until he felt he would never breathe again. He knew what he had to do.
It was getting dark again, Buffy noticed as she cleared away the dinner things. Where had the day gone? She could hear the others in the sitting room, arguing about what music to put on. Xander had suggested having a little party to celebrate averting another end of the world and everyone had agreed enthusiastically. It had been a while since they had been able to celebrate anything and Buffy knew that underneath the excuse, her friends wanted to make this a party for Willow's return and for the return of their old joy in just simply being friends. She smiled to herself.
"Buffy, tell Giles he's not allowed to chose the music." Dawn was at the kitchen door, pouting.
Giles appeared next to her, "Buffy, tell Dawn I will not put up with her choice of, quite frankly, bloody awful music."
Buffy's smile faded. It's tough being a mom, she told herself, sighing.
"OK, that's it. I'm letting Spike choose."
She ignored the protests as she walked past them and deposited some cans of beer on the table.
Ten minutes later, Spike had pushed back the table and the sofa and was showing Dawn how to 'pogo'. Generation X was on the stereo and Spike was in his element. Buffy and Willow were on the sofa watching and trying to keep their toes out of the way of some of the more enthusiastic 'dancing'. Giles was in the corner looking suspiciously like he was enjoying himself. He had been heard to mutter something like 'at least it's not some American teenager' before he settled down with his drink. Xander had disappeared in to the kitchen to look for some snacks, despite having only eaten half an hour before.
Later on, everyone had joined the dancing and a vase had been sacrificed to the god of parties by a stray swing of Xander's arm. Even Giles had joined in when a slightly drunken Willow had put on the wrong CD and The Rolling Stones made a brief appearance. They had been partying for about two hours when Buffy felt her Slayer strength flagging. She slipped out of the room, laughing at her sister's unusual approach to the Time Warp as she went. Grabbing another beer from the fridge, Buffy went out into the garden and sat on the porch steps, looking up at the clear sky, the sound of her friends' laughter drifting out behind her.
"You OK, pet?" Spike came and sat next to her.
"Yeah. I just needed some air."
They both fell into a comfortable silence, Buffy still looking at the stars and Spike searching for his lighter in his pockets.
"I hid it." Buffy said without looking at him.
"What?"
"Your lighter. I hid it when you and Giles were arguing about whether Rubber Soul was better than the White Album." She grinned.
"White Album. No contest," Spike tucked the cigarette back in the packet, "Why?"
Buffy turned to him, "I just glued you back together. I'm not gonna let you kill yourself with those things. So you can either go and buy another lighter, and I'll just hide that one, or you could give up smoking."
"Or I can ransack your house to find it." Buffy hit him on the arm. "I like that bloody lighter," he grumbled.
There was another pause.
"Buffy?"
"Hmm?" She was watching the sky again.
Spike reached out and turned her face to him. God, she was beautiful in the moonlight, her skin pale and soft, her hair shining silver-gold. "What you said earlier… about, you know, about… loving me. I was… well, I was wondering…"
Buffy smiled slightly; it was strange to see him, usually so confident, lost for words again. "Hey, I didn't say I loved you."
He dropped his gaze, "Oh, yeah. Sorry." He stood up quickly and pulled his duster around him, "I'd better see what that lot are up to."
"Spike, wait." She got up and went to him. "Let me finish. I didn't say I loved you, but I did say I could fall in love with you one day."
He could have sworn his heart had stopped again. "Well, with something like that to hope for, I can keep my soul shiny for as long as you want." He put a hand to her cheek again as she leaned towards him and put her arms around him. He bent his head and buried it in her neck, holding her as close as he could, his arms around her waist, pulling her to him. She kissed him softly on the check and leaned back a little to press her lips to his. Spike was lost again; lost in her scent, lost in her.
"Slayer!" the word rang out across the garden.
"Bloody hell," Spike growled, "What now?"
Buffy broke away from him and turned. Standing in the middle of her garden was the young man they'd seen at the apartments. He hadn't shaved for a few days and his clothes were a mess.
"You've failed, Slayer. My sister is on the rampage tonight and she thinks we've lost, but we haven't. You stopped the End of Days, but you didn't stop the war." Simon sighed, "Three of the Horsemen have risen."