A/N: Mr. Cino is my band director and Mr. Kelly is the orchestra
director/clarinet teacher. Mr. Collins is my social studies teacher. Dr.
Pitcher is the principal.
"The Story of Randomness."
(In the music room thing, Mr. Kelly is sitting eating a piece of apple pie. Mr. Cino enters carrying a box of cement hamburgers.)
Cino: What did I tell you about eating pie, Mr. Kelly?
Kelly: (finishes chewing last piece of pie) Not to. But it's not my fault. The Omnipotent Grand Vizier Grandpa Rafaj gave it to me.
Cino: (looks at whoever is sitting in the corner playing clarinet.) That's Chelsie.
Kelly: Nope. Chelsie doesn't come to lessons.
Cino: I told her I would come to the hamburgers' funeral if she came.
Kelly: Foiled again!
Chelsie: Grumio est coquus.
Cino: I'll coquus you!
~Jafar magically appears, cackling~
Jafar: *cackle* (looks around the room) Why am I here?
Chelsie: I summoned you.
Jafar: (turns to Mr. Cino.) Why am I here?
Cino: Possibly for the funeral.
Jafar: (getting excited) Rafaj's funeral?
Chelsie: No silly! For the cement hamburgers'. I would never let Rafaj die. I created him.
AK: Rafaj is a boy?
Chelsie: I guess so...
Jafar: You created him? DIE! (goes into a wild frenzy)
P.A.: Everyone must report to the assembly room immediately.
Chelsie: Goody! A lecture!
~The school goes to the auditorium to be lectured by Dr. Pitcher.~
Pitcher: Blah. Blah. Blah...who can tell me what the golden rule is?
Jafar: I can!
Pitcher: Yes, dark, sinister, ugly man?
Jafar: Whoever had the gold makes the rules!
(Uproarious laughter from the students)
Rafaj: (jumps up on the stage and starts dancing) *sings* This is Halloween, this is Halloween the pumpkin king has finally come...(falls down and has a seizure.)
Jafar: *shouts* Why must you always embarrass me?!
Rafaj: (abruptly stops spazing and stands up) No reason. (drops back to the floor and continues with the spasm.)
Dad: (looks at Rafaj and points to the bathroom.) Ach du lieber!
(Everyone looks around the room, puzzled.)
~~~
~At a random park in some random state~
Rafaj: Slide! Weee! Swings! Yeah! Spiny thingy! Waahoodals!
Jafar: Settle down, Rafaj. You're going to tire yourself out and drink a lot. Then you're going to have to use the lavatory, and there are no bathrooms here.
Rafaj: No I won't. I swear.
~10 minutes later~
Rafaj: I'm thirsty!
Jafar: (sighs) Oh, Rafaj. What'd I tell you?
Rafaj: That I was messing up your plans so I had to live in the dump.
Jafar: Not that long ago. Anyway it was hypothetical.
Rafaj: Does that mean I can have my drink?
Jafar: No, but you can anyways. There's Polish soda in the camel's pack.
Little boy: Hey Mister! What's your camel's name?
Rafaj: Uh-oh. See I told you he needed a name, Jafar.
Little boy: Can I help you pick one?
Rafaj: Sure!
(They tried out numerous names until the boy shouted,)
Boy: Bahman!
Rafaj: Ok!
Jafar: Oh jeeze...
~~~The Rampaging Camel~~~
(All of a sudden the camel started rampaging.)
Rafaj: Rampaging rhinos!
Chelsie: Hungry, Hungry Hippos!
Jafar: It's a camel.
Boy: Named Bahman.
Rafaj: Hungry, Hungry Hippos? Where? I love that game!
Bob the Builder: Hey! Me too!
Jafar: Why is this camel rampaging?
Camel: Lou! (spits)
Translation: I will beat you in your quest for world domination, Jafar. For camels everywhere! (diabolical laughter) (spits)
Rafaj: Hungry, Hungry Hippos? Where? I love that game!
(Everyone stares at Rafaj)
Jafar: We must capture that camel!
Alpaca: You're acting like Rafaj, Jafar.
Frowel: Alpaca...
#2: What was that, Frowel?
Frowel: I'll Alpaca your bags in a second if you don't shut up.
Mr. Cino: What's an alpaca anyways?
Mr. Kelly: A very wooly llama.
Jafar: Why are we back in school?
Chelsie: We aren't. You're just in shock because the alpaca said you're acting like Rafaj.
~~~
The End. For now.
"The Story of Randomness."
(In the music room thing, Mr. Kelly is sitting eating a piece of apple pie. Mr. Cino enters carrying a box of cement hamburgers.)
Cino: What did I tell you about eating pie, Mr. Kelly?
Kelly: (finishes chewing last piece of pie) Not to. But it's not my fault. The Omnipotent Grand Vizier Grandpa Rafaj gave it to me.
Cino: (looks at whoever is sitting in the corner playing clarinet.) That's Chelsie.
Kelly: Nope. Chelsie doesn't come to lessons.
Cino: I told her I would come to the hamburgers' funeral if she came.
Kelly: Foiled again!
Chelsie: Grumio est coquus.
Cino: I'll coquus you!
~Jafar magically appears, cackling~
Jafar: *cackle* (looks around the room) Why am I here?
Chelsie: I summoned you.
Jafar: (turns to Mr. Cino.) Why am I here?
Cino: Possibly for the funeral.
Jafar: (getting excited) Rafaj's funeral?
Chelsie: No silly! For the cement hamburgers'. I would never let Rafaj die. I created him.
AK: Rafaj is a boy?
Chelsie: I guess so...
Jafar: You created him? DIE! (goes into a wild frenzy)
P.A.: Everyone must report to the assembly room immediately.
Chelsie: Goody! A lecture!
~The school goes to the auditorium to be lectured by Dr. Pitcher.~
Pitcher: Blah. Blah. Blah...who can tell me what the golden rule is?
Jafar: I can!
Pitcher: Yes, dark, sinister, ugly man?
Jafar: Whoever had the gold makes the rules!
(Uproarious laughter from the students)
Rafaj: (jumps up on the stage and starts dancing) *sings* This is Halloween, this is Halloween the pumpkin king has finally come...(falls down and has a seizure.)
Jafar: *shouts* Why must you always embarrass me?!
Rafaj: (abruptly stops spazing and stands up) No reason. (drops back to the floor and continues with the spasm.)
Dad: (looks at Rafaj and points to the bathroom.) Ach du lieber!
(Everyone looks around the room, puzzled.)
~~~
~At a random park in some random state~
Rafaj: Slide! Weee! Swings! Yeah! Spiny thingy! Waahoodals!
Jafar: Settle down, Rafaj. You're going to tire yourself out and drink a lot. Then you're going to have to use the lavatory, and there are no bathrooms here.
Rafaj: No I won't. I swear.
~10 minutes later~
Rafaj: I'm thirsty!
Jafar: (sighs) Oh, Rafaj. What'd I tell you?
Rafaj: That I was messing up your plans so I had to live in the dump.
Jafar: Not that long ago. Anyway it was hypothetical.
Rafaj: Does that mean I can have my drink?
Jafar: No, but you can anyways. There's Polish soda in the camel's pack.
Little boy: Hey Mister! What's your camel's name?
Rafaj: Uh-oh. See I told you he needed a name, Jafar.
Little boy: Can I help you pick one?
Rafaj: Sure!
(They tried out numerous names until the boy shouted,)
Boy: Bahman!
Rafaj: Ok!
Jafar: Oh jeeze...
~~~The Rampaging Camel~~~
(All of a sudden the camel started rampaging.)
Rafaj: Rampaging rhinos!
Chelsie: Hungry, Hungry Hippos!
Jafar: It's a camel.
Boy: Named Bahman.
Rafaj: Hungry, Hungry Hippos? Where? I love that game!
Bob the Builder: Hey! Me too!
Jafar: Why is this camel rampaging?
Camel: Lou! (spits)
Translation: I will beat you in your quest for world domination, Jafar. For camels everywhere! (diabolical laughter) (spits)
Rafaj: Hungry, Hungry Hippos? Where? I love that game!
(Everyone stares at Rafaj)
Jafar: We must capture that camel!
Alpaca: You're acting like Rafaj, Jafar.
Frowel: Alpaca...
#2: What was that, Frowel?
Frowel: I'll Alpaca your bags in a second if you don't shut up.
Mr. Cino: What's an alpaca anyways?
Mr. Kelly: A very wooly llama.
Jafar: Why are we back in school?
Chelsie: We aren't. You're just in shock because the alpaca said you're acting like Rafaj.
~~~
The End. For now.