Summary: What if Susan had had a baby after Chloe had taken little Susie
away? An alternate universe story set at the end of season two. There's a
bit of romance too.
Spoilers: None that I could think of. Last relevant episode is 'Take these broken wings'. This takes place right after Mark and Susan's scene on the shore of the lake.
Ratings: PG-13
A/N: Just few things you might wanna know:
I don't live in the US and haven't seen season 9 yet.
English isn't my first language. Go easy on me but feel free to point out any mistake! I'm also looking for a beta-reader so if you wanna step in just let me know!
I'm no doctor and I have no medical knowledge whatsoever. I tried to put a little medicine in this, though, so forgive my many mistakes.
And learn to fly
By Elisa
Mark finally spotted Susan sitting at a table by the shore lake. She was wearing a hat, a black coat (where the hell had gone her brown one? Then he remembered she had given it to Chloe) and a green blouse. She had been smarter than him, he thought, shivering in his light, denim jacket. Anyway, she looked good. He hoped she really was good. He walked quickly to her and sat down in front of her, putting his diet Coke and sandwich on the table.
"Thought I'd never get out of there. Glad you didn't wait" he said apologetically and took a large bite of his sandwich. He was really starving. He eyed Susan's untouched sandwich avidly.
Susan caught this and pushed her sandwich towards him. "This is tuna and whole wheat with lettuce and tomato. You want it? I'm not really hungry."
"Right after I finish my cheese steak."
"I know I've said this before," Susan said tiredly, sighing heavily "but you have to get Kerry Weaver off my back."
"What now?" he asked with his mouth full.
"A six-month-old came in cyanotic and Kerry thinks I can't handle the intubation" she replied matter-of-factly.
"But you did right?"
"No!" Susan exclaimed, visibly annoyed. "She took over! Yes, it was a bay. Yes, it was hard but I've don this a hundred of times" she spat out quickly, toying nervously with her Styrofoam Starbucks mug in her hands.
Mark looked directly in her eyes, clearly worried. "How's everything else?"
"You mean therapy, that is what you mean, right? Well do I feel terrific? Not really. Am I marginally better? Not really" she gesticulated animatedly "Am I happy spending money on therapy and not, say, on Gymboree or a stroller? Not really" she concluded skeptically.
"So everything is going okay?" Mark smiled, jokingly.
This caused the first real smile from Susan Mark had seen that day. They both laughed heartedly. Right then Mark's beeper went off. He checked it and turned it off.
"Want to walk back?" he asked.
"They didn't page me."
"I wish there were something that I could do. Something that I could say."
So do I, Susan thought.
"Listen, why don't you have a bay yourself? I mean, you're still young, you really could and you already know you'd make a great mom. You even got to practice and that's not something everyone gets to do."
Susan chuckled " Thanks for your great advice, Mark. Do you have any names of sperm banks?"
"No," he replied getting up "But I know someone who would gladly volunteer to be a donor." Then he quickly kissed her on her lips and ran away, leaving Susan there, pleasantly shocked.
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After her session Susan dropped at the hospital. She quickly walked down the hallway and went to the board. She checked it but Mark's name wasn't on it. She walked back to the admin desk.
"Hey, Jer, where's Mark?"
"Dr. Lewis, what are you doing here, aren't you supposed to be off?"
"I am, I'm just looking for Mark, I was hoping to catch him."
"He went home half an hour ago."
"I'll go there, thanks."
Carter swung past, throwing a chart into the rack. "If I were you, Dr. Lewis, I wouldn't. It might not be the right time."
"Why?"
"He took home Loretta's kids, he's gotta be pretty busy. She's got to undergo another surgery."
"I see, goodnight then."
Susan walked towards the exit, then suddenly stopped in her tracks and turned around. "Carter!"
Carter stopped and turned around as well. "Yes? What's up, Susan?"
She walked closer to him. " I just want to ask you something. Where did you buy that beautiful music box you gave me as you secret Santa gift for Christmas?"
"In a small shop downtown, why?"
"I want to know if they work on commission. I wanna send little Susie a music box with 'Blackbird' for her birthday. It's next week."
"Oh, yeah," Carter said, laughing "It's a good idea. I remember it as it was yesterday, Chloe was screaming for the white album and I couldn't find it for the life of me. It was crazy!"
Susan chuckled " Yeah, and we sang it like a bunch of raving lunatics, because Chloe didn't want to breathe but thought that the Beatles would help!"
"I'll write you down the address, goodnight Susan."
"'Night, Carter. See ya."
Susan got out of the ER and walked to the El. While she was riding on the train she watched a couple of kids drawing. She had to struggle not to burst into tears right there. She took out Susie's painting with her tiny hands from daycare and looked at it, putting her hand on hers once more. She got off, reached Mark's place and rang the doorbell.
"Hi, Susan. I didn't expect you, come on in."
"I just stopped by to see if you need a hand for your babysitting."
"It's too late, you missed all the fun, I'm afraid. I just put them to bed. It was way too long since Rach was here last. I didn't remember it so tiring, looking after kids, I mean. My parental skills really needed a bit of brushing up."
"I might go as well, I didn't-"
"Look, Susan, I'm sorry about today, I don't want to ruin our friendship, you're my best friend and I-"
"Don't worry about it, Mark, it's not like you did something wrong."
Mark looked at her, surprised. "Are you actually saying you liked it, the kiss, I mean?"
"As long as it wasn't born out of pity, yes, I did like it."
"It wasn't."
Then Mark stood there, speechless, not knowing what else to say. He didn't actually think Susan would reciprocate his feelings. This was too good to be true.
"Are you ok, Mark?" Susan asked, smiling, the confused yet happy, goofy expression on her best friend's face priceless.
"Yeah, I guess so."
"You kissed me out of the blue, I guess I should be the wordless one, here."
"I've felt this way so long that I could say I was so used to hiding these feeling it just feels so weird them being out in the open, that's all."
"This way, what?" Susan prodded, a devilish smile on her lips.
"You really like not making things easy for me, huh? You want the full boyfriend-to-be treatment? So, here you are."
Mark knelt down in front of her, took her hand and looked in her eyes. "I love you, Susan."
Susan laughed " You really had me scared there for a while, Mark, you know? I thought you was actually going to ask me to marry you!"
Mark laughed as well "Hey, don't you think that would just be rushing things a bit? An 'I love you, too' would have been fine anyway."
"I think I've got a better idea" she said smiling, leaning forward and kissed him.
They pulled away. "Hum.Good idea."
"Doctor Greene?"
Loretta's son was standing in the living room doorway, wearing his PJs, shifting his weight nervously from toe to toe, sucking on his thumb like a much younger kid.
"What's up, kiddo?"
"I need a glass of water."
"Sure, I'll get you one right now." Mark said, taking him by his hand, then noticed he was staring at Susan nervously "This is Dr. Susan Lewis from the hospital, remember?"
The kid shook his head.
"Let's go get that water, come on."
They disappeared into the kitchen. Mark returned after a few minutes.
"He's asleep now. Wanna have something to drink?"
"No, can I smoke, though?"
"Sure, go ahead."
Susan took a pack of cigarettes out of her bag and lit one, dragging avidly on every puff of smoke, taking comfort from that gesture. Then she plopped on Mark's couch. Mark sat down next to her.
Letting out another wisp of gray smoke, she sighed "Did I tell you I have still an outstanding bill in daycare? Oh, I'm loving this whole insult to injury thing."
Mark squeezed her hand.
"Did I mention it's Susie's birthday next week?"
"I know. Do you think you could send my present along with yours?"
"Sure. I was thinking of getting a music box with 'Blackbird'."
"Couldn't think of a better idea, Susan. I'm sure she'll love it."
"Yeah, she needed me to sing that song to her as a lullaby but I've never been good at it. I'm so tuneless. Chloe is so better at it than me."
"Do you remember our Christmas caroling up in recovery?"
"Oh, yeah," Susan laughed "We were so terrible. I still don't know how Carol managed to drag us all up there. You had the rhythm completely wrong!"
"Me?!? What about you, huh?" he exclaimed and kissed her.
"You know what, Susan? You should really quit smoking. You taste like tobacco already."
"You're being the bossy boyfriend already, huh?"
"Yeah, I'm so bossy, always been. That's why Jen left me. Who's Weaver compared to me?"
"Stop that!" she said, shutting him up with a kiss. Then she started tickling him mercilessly.
Mark managed to free himself of her hands. "That wasn't fair, you know?" he said, throwing at her a big book that was on the small table by the couch.
"Ouch! What was that?" she said picking up the thick volume and read out the title "Managing through examples: 12 steps to a more efficient work place."
"Kerry Weaver lent tit to me" Mark explained " She has been hammering me about it all day long. I think I made the biggest mistake of my whole life supporting her as an attending. She's been babbling about 'finally being able to facilitate some real change around the hospital', can you believe it?" he concluded in a shrill, feminine voice, imitating Kerry.
"That kind of day, huh?" she laughed. "Look, I should go home, you know, it's getting really late."
"Stay here."
"Come on, Mark, you know what a big deal they're gonna make out of it if we ride together to work tomorrow!"
"Who cares? Been there, done that. Remember when Carter started that big rumor about our torrid affair?"
"Yeah, why don't we give them a good reason to be gossiping about?" she said kissing him more passionately.
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Susan walked into the ER, trying to adjust her hair, which was all tangled and spiky on her head. Carter looked at her, evidently very much amused.
"What did you do to your hair, Susan? New hairdo?"
"We don't all come to work all smart as you do, Dr. Carter" she said underlying the word doctor, pointing to the elegant Hugo Boss suit he was wearing under his lab-coat. "Mark doesn't have a second helmet yet. Is it the big day already, huh?" she continued, referring to his graduation, which would take place later that day.
"You're telling me you rode in with Mark, on his motorbike? With Mark Greene?"
"Do you know any other Mark Greene, Carter? So, what's so strange about it?"
Carter wasn't listening to her, though. He had turned to Jerry, with a big 'I told you so' smile.
"Give me my money, Jer!"
Jerry opened his wallet and angrily threw twenty bucks on the admin desk. Carter quickly grabbed them.
"How the hell did you do it?"
"Dunno, Jer. I simply knew it. Tell the others to give me my twenty bucks, Jerry." Carter said, as he put the money in his pocket.
"What is this all about, Carter?"
"I won a bet. I bet you and Dr. Greene would be shacked up together by the end of the month."
"This is unbelievable!" Susan exclaimed.
"What?" Mark asked, sneaking up behind her back and planting a kiss on her neck. Then he laughed, trying to smooth her hair. "I really should get a second helmet, Susan."
"They had a pool on us, can you believe it?"
"As they already did on the date of my divorce, on the sex of Conni's baby and a number of things I can't remember. So, don't feel special."
Doug passed by and patted Mark proudly on the shoulder. "Congratulations, buddy. It was about the time you decide to make a move."
"Oh, God!" Susan exclaimed "Does the whole hospital know about it already?"
"Words get around fast and nurses have ears everywhere!" Doug yelled after her.
"This place is an asylum!"
"Took you so long to figure it out?" Mark told her.
"Sometimes you just don't want to face the truth, I guess." Susan turned and saw Kerry crutching towards them, a dark expression on her face. "Here she comes," she said, referring to her own personal nightmare.
"Mark, Susan!" Kerry called out "You're late!"
"And a very good morning to you, too, Kerry." Mark said "It's just two past eight, Kerry!"
"You should be seeing patients already" she replied, unperturbed.
"Ok, ok, let us just take off our coats, will you?"
Mark opened the door of the lounge and let Susan in, then he stopped and turned to Kerry. "Look, Kerry, Susan told me about that intubation thing and you should-"
"Mark, due to the nature of your relationship with Susan Lewis, I don't think you're in any position to judge this matter, let alone tell me what to do."
"Are you questioning my ability to deal with residents, Kerry?" Mark asked in disbelief.
"In this specific case, Mark, yes."
Mark shook his head, incredulously. He went into the lounge, where Susan was already changed and sipping some coffee.
"Hurgh! This coffee is so terrible.Benton must have done it." she said throwing it all away.
"You really wanna listen to this, Susan. I told Kerry about your problem with her and she had the gut to tell me I'm not objective about it because of us!"
"I told you this would give us a lot of problems, Mark."
"So far, Kerry is the only person who seems to have a problem with it, and that's not bad considering that probably the whole staff of County knows about it by now."
"She had a problem with me before, she still has one, only that she dragged you into it as well now. I'm sorry about that, Mark."
"Don't be. It was me who helped hire her so you could easily say I am the cause of my own ruin."
"You can say that out loud."
"We'd better get outta here, before she jumps on our back again."
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"You wanna keep it dry for a few days and change the bandages everyday, Mrs. Tingle."
"I feel so stupid, Dr. Lewis."
"No, you're just clumsy, Mrs. Tingle. I always spill things on me, you just happened to spill hot water on your lap, that's all" she replied smiling.
"Thanks a lot, Dr. Lewis."
"Anytime, Mrs. Tingle. Just pay more attention next time you cook pasta."
Susan exited the curtain area. ""Who's next, Jer?" she asked the desk clerk who was approaching her.
"A diabetic man in Exam Two. Dr. Greene also called to remind you of your cruise on the lake for tonight. Said to meet him on the dock at 8:30 sharp."
"So romantic, Susan," said Lydia passing by, holding some emesis basins "it's been four moths already, isn't it?"
"Yeah, four months."
Susan walked into Exam Two, where a fat pouting man was sitting on a bad. He was along time acquaintance of Susan, usually he didn't take insulin on purpose just to come to the ER and be treated by her, needing nothing more than some attention, a sympathetic ear and some TLC.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Jennings. Why did you skip your insulin this time?"
"Dr. Lewis!" he exclaimed, his big, plump face immediately lit up "it's been so long! How good to see you! You don't know about my sister getting remarried then? She had this lovely ceremony-"
"Paul, tell me why you skipped your insulin first."
"I didn't this time. Anyway, I was telling you, the ceremony was lovely, in this little Presbyterian chapel and-"
"Why your glucose was so high, then? You know the rule, Paul, first the P&H and then you get to tell me your news, come on, be a good patient now."
"Okey-dokey, Dr. Lewis. Maybe it was the chocolate."
"What chocolate and how much did you eat?"
"Three or four bars, maybe five. I needed it , Dr. Lewis."
"You know you should follow your regimen, Paul. Diabetes is a serious disease if untreated."
"But my ex-wife was really bugging me. I was depressed. You know chocolate is good for lifting up your spirits, don't you, Dr. Lewis?"
"Yeah, it's known for its antidepressant qualities. But it's no good for your diabetes, got that Paul?"
Mr. Jennings nodded and Susan felt the sudden urge to throw up. "Would you excuse me for a minute?" she said, bringing her hand to her mouth and rushed to the ladies room.
"Hey, I didn't finished telling about my sister's wedding, Dr. Lewis!"
She puked into a stall. Then she went into the lounge, tied a tourniquet to her arm and drew some blood with a syringe. Then she got out of the room and bumped into Haleh, who was just looking for her.
"Dr. Lewis, I-" Haleh stopped "are you ok?"
"Sure, what were you telling me?"
"What do you want me to do on Mr. Jennings? He keeps asking for you, too."
Susan scribbled a couple of tests on the patient's chart then handed the nurse a small container. "Tell him I'll be with him in a minute. Here's the sample."
"Susan!" Carter called out to her.
"What?"
"I need some advice. I've got this patient of mine. I found a four- centimeter aortic aneurysm. Type-three dissection by the Debache classification. No signs of pericardial tamponade. Benton's pushing me for surgery but the patient seems alarmed and not at all happy with it. What would you do?"
"You said four centimeters, right? No appreciable murmur of aortic inefficiency and the aortic valve is normal, I guess? So it still meets the criteria to be treated medically. You surgeons are way too eager to cut people open. Tell Benton you're saving the hospital a few thousands bucks worth of surgery."
"Thanks a lot Susan."
"Anytime, Carter."
"Wanna grab something to eat?" Doug asked her, breezing by.
"No, thanks, I'm not really that hungry, Doug."
"Hey, you look damn pale! You sure you're ok? You still up for Mark's romantic plan for tonight, aren't you?"
"He would kill me if I wasn't, I guess I don't have that much choice."
Haleh interrupted them "We have a fascinoma, here, Dr. Lewis. Lab results on the diabetic are back. Not only is his glucose level normal, but Mr. Jennings's pregnancy test came back positive, too!"
Susan's heart leaped up. "They must have mixed up orders in the lab. I'll write another one and take a new sample, Haleh."
Wendy tapped on Susan's shoulder. "Sorry to interrupt but you have a call, Dr. Lewis."
"Thanks, Wendy. Susan Lewis speaking."
"Hi, big Suz!"
"Chloe?"
"Yeah, it's me, sis!"
"Chloe, I told you a hundred time not to call me at work unless it's an emergency, as in I'm giving birth right now, or our house is burnt to the foundations or little Susie's missing, fro Christ's sake, Chloe! Do we speak the same language or not?"
"Calm down, Suz, little Susie misses you very much. I just wanna know when you're coming visit us again, that's all, big, freaked out sister."
"Yeah, I got freaked out living with you, Chloe. Listen I have some news. I'm pregnant Chloe."
"Wow! It's Mark's isn't it?"
"Of course it is, Chloe!"
"Hey, is it a boy or a girl?"
"I don't know, Chloe, I found out about the pregnancy just today."
"If it's a girl your gonna name her Chloe, right? Anyway, Susie is gonna be so thrilled to have a little cousin. Call me as son as you know more, Suz!"
"I will, Chloe. Give Susie a big hug and a kiss from me, okay?"
"Bye, big Suz! Hey, put the receiver on your stomach, Suz, come on!"
"Chloe, I'm in the hallway in the ER, nobody knows about the baby! They'll think I've gone mad!"
"Come on, come on, do it!"
"Okay" she gave in, walked closer to the wall and put the receiver on her bellybutton.
"Bye little Chloe! It's your aunt, big Chloe, here."
Susan couldn't help but smiling. "Say hello to Joe."
Susan hang up and leaned against the wall, still smiling. Her sister could be crazy but she loved her. She had always known how to make her smile, always. She saw Kerry coming her way and the smile vanished from her lips. Here she comes again.
"Susan, have you seen Carter?"
"I think he's in the Suture room, why?"
"I've got a woman crying with joy in Trauma Two because I've just told her husband has died, only that the man Carter had told me it was her husband, it's not the husband at all!"
"What?" Susan said, laughing "He did it again?"
"Again?"
"The first time Benton told him to give the bad news to the parents of a dead kid he told the wrong parents. It turned out he had misidentified the body."
"Jesus Christ!"
Carter rushed by a few minutes later, cursing under his breath.
"Old habits die hard, huh, Carter?" she told him, chuckling.
"Ah, ah, very funny Susan. Come with me." Carter said, taking her by her hand and dragging her all the way to Trauma Two.
"Slow down, Carter!"
"Look," he said, giving her a picture and uncovering the patient's face "It's him!"
"Carter," Susan said, struggling to fight laughter "Hasn't it ever occurred to you this man could have a twin brother?"
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The gentle yet chilly lake breeze wept Susan's hair over her forehead, and she removed a loc of hair, tucking it under her ear. She was tired and the water lapping lulled her, making her wanting to sleep so much. The lights of Chicago reflected on the black waters of the lake, creating a magic and romantic atmosphere. This was so perfect and she was sorry she wasn't enjoying it as Mark had planned. She didn't want to spoil their moment, but she was a bit worried about the pregnancy thing, and it showed. Mark looked at her almost untouched plate.
"Are you alright, Susan? You hardly ate at all, and you practically didn't say a word."
"I'm just not hungry, Mark. Ok, and worried. But I'm loving this cruise, you know."
"You don't look like it, though, Susan, so you don't have to lie to me."
"Listen, Mark, I need to tell you something."
"I knew something was bothering you, so spill the beans, I'm ready."
"I don't think you are. Ok, here it goes, Mark, I'm pregnant."
"What?" Mark almost choked on his pommes de terre et tomates soup. "I mean, it's wonderful! Wonderful news, how far along are you?"
"Almost five weeks, I think."
"How come you didn't notice before?"
"I've never been regular and we've been careful."
"Not that careful," Mark grinned "Remember that tie in your car, and how about that time in the lounge?"
"Ok, ok."
"Did you have an OB/Gyn take a look at you?"
"I booked an ultrasound with Coburn for the day after tomorrow."
"I don't wanna that witch anywhere my baby!"
"Come on, Mark, she's good!"
"She's still a witch, though. Rach is gonna be so thrilled about having a bay sister."
"What if it's a boy?"
"I guess they'll fight all the time."
"Me and my sister did that a lot too, even if we are both girls. By the way, Chloe called and I told her."
"Good, how's she?" "Looks like she still keeps it together. I hope so much it will last this time."
"It will."
"With Chloe, I've always felt that lower expectations made life easier. Anyway, Susie deserves it, even though you know how much I'd love to take her back."
"You'll have our baby to take care of, now."
"I know."
"I guess I'll have to call Mom and Dad. And Jen, I guess."
"Can't wait to tell Cookie and Dad, too. I can already imagine her face! Not that she was the least bit cooperative with Chloe, you know."
"You won't need her cooperation, this time, I'm here."
"Pay attention to what you say, Mark! Are you actually telling me you'll get up every night at two A.M. to warm up the bottle or change stinky diapers and so on?"
"Hey, I didn't say that! Besides, I already went through that one time."
" I did too."
"We'll take turns, then."
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The pregnancy passed in a blur. Mark was there for Susan through all the morning sickness (why don't they call it 24/7sickness? Susan wondered) , the back pains, the swollen feet and the first Braxton-Hicks. They were planning a mid-March wedding, after the baby was born. They still didn't know the sex, they wanted it to be a surprise. Susan worked until full-terms, sticking to minor cases on a part-time basis for the last two months, per Kerry Weaver's orders. She was working that late February day. She was looking at Mrs. Malloy's x-rays, on a light- board in Exam Three.
"You radius and ulna all appear, although there's a small fracture on one small bone of your wrist. I'll call someone down from Ortho. They'll take a look at it and then I'll put- Ouch!" she suddenly exclaimed.
"What's wrong, Dr. Lewis? Oh no, I knew it, it's cancer, isn't it? Bone cancer. One of those fatal carcinomas or something.How long do I still have?" she asked, starting to sob and wipe. She had been bugging Susan about cancer all the time of her exam, while she had been admitted only for a possible fracture.
"No, Mrs. Malloy, you do not have cancer!" she exclaimed, frustrated. "Now if you will excuse me, I'll call othropedics."
"I know, there's not need for you to keep lying, you can tell me the truth."
"Mrs. Malloy, all you have is a fracture in a small bone in your wrist. Let me tell you this just one more time: you do not have cancer!"
She leapt up when another, stronger twinge of pain flashed through her body "Ouch!"
"What? I knew you weren't telling me the truth! I do have cancer!"
Susan shook her head in exhaustion as she struggled to get to her feet, clutching her enormous belly. "You're fine, Mrs. Malloy, fine. Do we speak the same language? On the contrary, I have trouble, because my water has apparently just broke. Now if you excuse me." Susan slowly waddled out of the room.
She stepped out into the hallway when a gurney rushed in front of her, making her flatten against the wall, for what it was possible to her.
"Watch out! Coming through!"
"Mark! Mark, I need your help!" she called out.
"Susan, can I help you?" Kerry asked, crutching towards her.
"Yeah, but would you please page Mark?" she said as Kerry help her climb up on a gurney "My water broke."
"The big day is here, huh?" Kerry smiled, rubbing her back sympathetically "Lily! Get me an ultrasound and a fetal monitor and page Dr. Greene, stat!"
"Listen, Susan, I know I'm the last person on earth you would wanna me with you now, but I'll check you out and then I'll ship you up to OB right away, ok?" she said compassionately "Lily page, Coburn, too, will you?"
"Kerry, you and I may not get along that well, but I respect you greatly and I know you're a damn fine doctor. I'm glad it's you, I really am, believe it or not."
"Thanks, Susan. How far along are you exactly?"
"Thirty-two weeks, kind of early don't you think?"
"Yeah, not too much, though. Baby here is a little too eager to meet Mommy and Daddy, huh?"
"Ouch! I noticed that."
Kerry spread the gel on Susan's exposed belly and proceeded with the ultrasound. "Baby here is more than fine. Fetal heartbeat is steady and within normal limits. You still don't wanna know the sex, right? I won't spoil you the surprise, don't worry."
"Ok, how about sending me up, Kerry?"
"Coburn isn't here yet and don't you wanna wait for Mark?"
"You bet I want to."
"Heard someone call my name." Mark jogged up to them and kissed Susan on the top of her head. "Hi, honey, how are you doing here?"
"Fetal heartbeat is ok, so does look the baby from the ultrasound. Mom is ok too, her water broke nearly forty-five minutes ago. I gave her pytocin and paged Coburn, who's on her way in."
"Thanks, Kerry. I can take it from here, now."
"No, you can't. It' way too personal. I'm in charge of your wife-to-be's healthcare."
"Kerry, I-"
"Mark, she's right." Susan said, squeezing his hand. "I trust Kerry."
"So do I."
"Hurgh!"
"What was that, Susan?" Mark asked, massaging her back.
"A contraction, that's called a contraction, I thought you had already gone through one of these, Mark, without counting hundreds of patients so- Huuuurgh! This hurts so much!"
"How far apart are they, Susan?"
"Six minutes, I think. Aren't you a doctor for Christ's sake! Huuuurgh!"
"Kerry, we need you in here!"
Kerry rushed to Susan's side and listened to the baby's heart pressing her stethoscope on Susan's stomach. "What's going on here?" she asked "Would you switch that fetal monitor on, please, Mark?"
She checked the screen of both the monitor and the ultrasound and then said "Things are under control but looks like drugs aren't working. Everything's fine, Susan. Things are just speeding up a bit. Where the hell is Coburn?"
"She's stuck in a traffic jam, Dr. Weaver."
"Okay, let's alert OB that we have an imminent delivery coming up and get an anesthesiologist down."
"Huuuurgh!"
" Blow thorough your nose, Susan, blow through your nose, come on, you're doing a great job!" Mark encouraged her. "Do you want me to put on some music, 'the white album', maybe?" "No! I just want an epidural, now!"
"Kerry just called him, hold on, Susan, hold on!"
Janet Coburn, the chief of OB/Gyn, butted her way into the room and peered under Susan's gown, greeting Mark and Kerry with a brief movement of her head. "How is it going Susan? Ok, she's fully dilated and ninety percent effaced. How about contractions?"
"Three minutes apart. Looks like you got here just in time, Janet." Kerry answered.
"Ok, let's bring her up, follow us Dr. Greene"
"I'm right behind you, Susan."
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One hour and half later Mark Greene was holding his baby daughter in his arms. She was so beautiful, she had big green eyes, just like Susan. She was very quiet, she had barely cried even when she had come out of her mother's womb. Mark looked at her with adoringly eyes, he had already fallen in love with her.
"Look at her, Susan, she so beautiful! She's got her mommy's eyes!"
"Yeah, and her daddy's hair, I'm afraid." Susan replied laughing, referring to the baby's almost bald head.
"Your mom's got such a funny sense of humor, don't you think little one, huh?" he said tweaking her plump, pink cheeks. "Look at her, look at her, she's smiling, she does really find you funny, Susan?"
"Difficult to believe, huh?"
"You've got a such a funny mommy, haven't you? Hi funny mommy, hi!" he said gently twisting his daughter's tiny hand in a hello-like gesture. "So, how are we gonna name this little angel, Susan, huh?"
"Chloe wants me to name after her, but I think two Susan in the family is confusing enough already. How about Nancy, do you like it, Mark?"
"Nancy Greene. Sounds good. What do you think, little angel, huh?" he said swirling the baby in the air. She gurgled with excitement, little bubbles of saliva falling on her dad's glasses.
"She likes it. Nancy it is, then." Mark said, drying the glasses with the sleeve of his shirt.
Susan watched mark play with Nancy until the baby eventually was asleep. She didn't get to see that because fatigue had overwhelmed her and she had fallen asleep herself. When she slowly opened her eyes she saw that Mark had dozed off as well, sitting on a chair by her side, his head hanging on his shoulder, which would cause him a bad neck pain later, his glasses threatening to fall off his nose. She smiled and took off Mark's glasses and put them on her nightstand. Right then Nancy started to cry. Feeling sore all over, Susan got up and walked to the crib which was at the other end of the hospital room.
"Oh, no, no, don't cry, my little baby, don't cry" she said as she picked her up. She wasn't wet and it wasn't time for her feeding yet.
Susan started to rock her, to no avail.
"Come on, Nance, what do you want mommy to do? You don't wanna wake daddy up, don't you? Maybe a little singing would help, huh? Your cousin Susie likes it very much. She falls asleep right away. Maybe that's just a self defense system, 'cause I can't really sing, it's still worth a try, though."
And then she started to sing softly " Blackbirds singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly, all your life you're waiting for this day to arrive."
Fine
A/N: I know this is short and lame, but that's what I was thinking the whole time during 'Take these broken wings'. Why didn't Susan just get herself pregnant, if she wanted a baby so badly? And I missed Mark so much. I know there's a lot of people who don't like him and find him extremely boring but I realized how important he was to the ER only when he was gone. Maybe he wasn't quite 'the moral center of the ER', but he certainly was its main figure. I think Mark and Susan were meant to be as well. Not that I don't like Elizabeth, on the contrary I love her, I just think she and Benton had the best chemistry ever, after Doug and Carol.
Spoilers: None that I could think of. Last relevant episode is 'Take these broken wings'. This takes place right after Mark and Susan's scene on the shore of the lake.
Ratings: PG-13
A/N: Just few things you might wanna know:
I don't live in the US and haven't seen season 9 yet.
English isn't my first language. Go easy on me but feel free to point out any mistake! I'm also looking for a beta-reader so if you wanna step in just let me know!
I'm no doctor and I have no medical knowledge whatsoever. I tried to put a little medicine in this, though, so forgive my many mistakes.
And learn to fly
By Elisa
Mark finally spotted Susan sitting at a table by the shore lake. She was wearing a hat, a black coat (where the hell had gone her brown one? Then he remembered she had given it to Chloe) and a green blouse. She had been smarter than him, he thought, shivering in his light, denim jacket. Anyway, she looked good. He hoped she really was good. He walked quickly to her and sat down in front of her, putting his diet Coke and sandwich on the table.
"Thought I'd never get out of there. Glad you didn't wait" he said apologetically and took a large bite of his sandwich. He was really starving. He eyed Susan's untouched sandwich avidly.
Susan caught this and pushed her sandwich towards him. "This is tuna and whole wheat with lettuce and tomato. You want it? I'm not really hungry."
"Right after I finish my cheese steak."
"I know I've said this before," Susan said tiredly, sighing heavily "but you have to get Kerry Weaver off my back."
"What now?" he asked with his mouth full.
"A six-month-old came in cyanotic and Kerry thinks I can't handle the intubation" she replied matter-of-factly.
"But you did right?"
"No!" Susan exclaimed, visibly annoyed. "She took over! Yes, it was a bay. Yes, it was hard but I've don this a hundred of times" she spat out quickly, toying nervously with her Styrofoam Starbucks mug in her hands.
Mark looked directly in her eyes, clearly worried. "How's everything else?"
"You mean therapy, that is what you mean, right? Well do I feel terrific? Not really. Am I marginally better? Not really" she gesticulated animatedly "Am I happy spending money on therapy and not, say, on Gymboree or a stroller? Not really" she concluded skeptically.
"So everything is going okay?" Mark smiled, jokingly.
This caused the first real smile from Susan Mark had seen that day. They both laughed heartedly. Right then Mark's beeper went off. He checked it and turned it off.
"Want to walk back?" he asked.
"They didn't page me."
"I wish there were something that I could do. Something that I could say."
So do I, Susan thought.
"Listen, why don't you have a bay yourself? I mean, you're still young, you really could and you already know you'd make a great mom. You even got to practice and that's not something everyone gets to do."
Susan chuckled " Thanks for your great advice, Mark. Do you have any names of sperm banks?"
"No," he replied getting up "But I know someone who would gladly volunteer to be a donor." Then he quickly kissed her on her lips and ran away, leaving Susan there, pleasantly shocked.
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After her session Susan dropped at the hospital. She quickly walked down the hallway and went to the board. She checked it but Mark's name wasn't on it. She walked back to the admin desk.
"Hey, Jer, where's Mark?"
"Dr. Lewis, what are you doing here, aren't you supposed to be off?"
"I am, I'm just looking for Mark, I was hoping to catch him."
"He went home half an hour ago."
"I'll go there, thanks."
Carter swung past, throwing a chart into the rack. "If I were you, Dr. Lewis, I wouldn't. It might not be the right time."
"Why?"
"He took home Loretta's kids, he's gotta be pretty busy. She's got to undergo another surgery."
"I see, goodnight then."
Susan walked towards the exit, then suddenly stopped in her tracks and turned around. "Carter!"
Carter stopped and turned around as well. "Yes? What's up, Susan?"
She walked closer to him. " I just want to ask you something. Where did you buy that beautiful music box you gave me as you secret Santa gift for Christmas?"
"In a small shop downtown, why?"
"I want to know if they work on commission. I wanna send little Susie a music box with 'Blackbird' for her birthday. It's next week."
"Oh, yeah," Carter said, laughing "It's a good idea. I remember it as it was yesterday, Chloe was screaming for the white album and I couldn't find it for the life of me. It was crazy!"
Susan chuckled " Yeah, and we sang it like a bunch of raving lunatics, because Chloe didn't want to breathe but thought that the Beatles would help!"
"I'll write you down the address, goodnight Susan."
"'Night, Carter. See ya."
Susan got out of the ER and walked to the El. While she was riding on the train she watched a couple of kids drawing. She had to struggle not to burst into tears right there. She took out Susie's painting with her tiny hands from daycare and looked at it, putting her hand on hers once more. She got off, reached Mark's place and rang the doorbell.
"Hi, Susan. I didn't expect you, come on in."
"I just stopped by to see if you need a hand for your babysitting."
"It's too late, you missed all the fun, I'm afraid. I just put them to bed. It was way too long since Rach was here last. I didn't remember it so tiring, looking after kids, I mean. My parental skills really needed a bit of brushing up."
"I might go as well, I didn't-"
"Look, Susan, I'm sorry about today, I don't want to ruin our friendship, you're my best friend and I-"
"Don't worry about it, Mark, it's not like you did something wrong."
Mark looked at her, surprised. "Are you actually saying you liked it, the kiss, I mean?"
"As long as it wasn't born out of pity, yes, I did like it."
"It wasn't."
Then Mark stood there, speechless, not knowing what else to say. He didn't actually think Susan would reciprocate his feelings. This was too good to be true.
"Are you ok, Mark?" Susan asked, smiling, the confused yet happy, goofy expression on her best friend's face priceless.
"Yeah, I guess so."
"You kissed me out of the blue, I guess I should be the wordless one, here."
"I've felt this way so long that I could say I was so used to hiding these feeling it just feels so weird them being out in the open, that's all."
"This way, what?" Susan prodded, a devilish smile on her lips.
"You really like not making things easy for me, huh? You want the full boyfriend-to-be treatment? So, here you are."
Mark knelt down in front of her, took her hand and looked in her eyes. "I love you, Susan."
Susan laughed " You really had me scared there for a while, Mark, you know? I thought you was actually going to ask me to marry you!"
Mark laughed as well "Hey, don't you think that would just be rushing things a bit? An 'I love you, too' would have been fine anyway."
"I think I've got a better idea" she said smiling, leaning forward and kissed him.
They pulled away. "Hum.Good idea."
"Doctor Greene?"
Loretta's son was standing in the living room doorway, wearing his PJs, shifting his weight nervously from toe to toe, sucking on his thumb like a much younger kid.
"What's up, kiddo?"
"I need a glass of water."
"Sure, I'll get you one right now." Mark said, taking him by his hand, then noticed he was staring at Susan nervously "This is Dr. Susan Lewis from the hospital, remember?"
The kid shook his head.
"Let's go get that water, come on."
They disappeared into the kitchen. Mark returned after a few minutes.
"He's asleep now. Wanna have something to drink?"
"No, can I smoke, though?"
"Sure, go ahead."
Susan took a pack of cigarettes out of her bag and lit one, dragging avidly on every puff of smoke, taking comfort from that gesture. Then she plopped on Mark's couch. Mark sat down next to her.
Letting out another wisp of gray smoke, she sighed "Did I tell you I have still an outstanding bill in daycare? Oh, I'm loving this whole insult to injury thing."
Mark squeezed her hand.
"Did I mention it's Susie's birthday next week?"
"I know. Do you think you could send my present along with yours?"
"Sure. I was thinking of getting a music box with 'Blackbird'."
"Couldn't think of a better idea, Susan. I'm sure she'll love it."
"Yeah, she needed me to sing that song to her as a lullaby but I've never been good at it. I'm so tuneless. Chloe is so better at it than me."
"Do you remember our Christmas caroling up in recovery?"
"Oh, yeah," Susan laughed "We were so terrible. I still don't know how Carol managed to drag us all up there. You had the rhythm completely wrong!"
"Me?!? What about you, huh?" he exclaimed and kissed her.
"You know what, Susan? You should really quit smoking. You taste like tobacco already."
"You're being the bossy boyfriend already, huh?"
"Yeah, I'm so bossy, always been. That's why Jen left me. Who's Weaver compared to me?"
"Stop that!" she said, shutting him up with a kiss. Then she started tickling him mercilessly.
Mark managed to free himself of her hands. "That wasn't fair, you know?" he said, throwing at her a big book that was on the small table by the couch.
"Ouch! What was that?" she said picking up the thick volume and read out the title "Managing through examples: 12 steps to a more efficient work place."
"Kerry Weaver lent tit to me" Mark explained " She has been hammering me about it all day long. I think I made the biggest mistake of my whole life supporting her as an attending. She's been babbling about 'finally being able to facilitate some real change around the hospital', can you believe it?" he concluded in a shrill, feminine voice, imitating Kerry.
"That kind of day, huh?" she laughed. "Look, I should go home, you know, it's getting really late."
"Stay here."
"Come on, Mark, you know what a big deal they're gonna make out of it if we ride together to work tomorrow!"
"Who cares? Been there, done that. Remember when Carter started that big rumor about our torrid affair?"
"Yeah, why don't we give them a good reason to be gossiping about?" she said kissing him more passionately.
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Susan walked into the ER, trying to adjust her hair, which was all tangled and spiky on her head. Carter looked at her, evidently very much amused.
"What did you do to your hair, Susan? New hairdo?"
"We don't all come to work all smart as you do, Dr. Carter" she said underlying the word doctor, pointing to the elegant Hugo Boss suit he was wearing under his lab-coat. "Mark doesn't have a second helmet yet. Is it the big day already, huh?" she continued, referring to his graduation, which would take place later that day.
"You're telling me you rode in with Mark, on his motorbike? With Mark Greene?"
"Do you know any other Mark Greene, Carter? So, what's so strange about it?"
Carter wasn't listening to her, though. He had turned to Jerry, with a big 'I told you so' smile.
"Give me my money, Jer!"
Jerry opened his wallet and angrily threw twenty bucks on the admin desk. Carter quickly grabbed them.
"How the hell did you do it?"
"Dunno, Jer. I simply knew it. Tell the others to give me my twenty bucks, Jerry." Carter said, as he put the money in his pocket.
"What is this all about, Carter?"
"I won a bet. I bet you and Dr. Greene would be shacked up together by the end of the month."
"This is unbelievable!" Susan exclaimed.
"What?" Mark asked, sneaking up behind her back and planting a kiss on her neck. Then he laughed, trying to smooth her hair. "I really should get a second helmet, Susan."
"They had a pool on us, can you believe it?"
"As they already did on the date of my divorce, on the sex of Conni's baby and a number of things I can't remember. So, don't feel special."
Doug passed by and patted Mark proudly on the shoulder. "Congratulations, buddy. It was about the time you decide to make a move."
"Oh, God!" Susan exclaimed "Does the whole hospital know about it already?"
"Words get around fast and nurses have ears everywhere!" Doug yelled after her.
"This place is an asylum!"
"Took you so long to figure it out?" Mark told her.
"Sometimes you just don't want to face the truth, I guess." Susan turned and saw Kerry crutching towards them, a dark expression on her face. "Here she comes," she said, referring to her own personal nightmare.
"Mark, Susan!" Kerry called out "You're late!"
"And a very good morning to you, too, Kerry." Mark said "It's just two past eight, Kerry!"
"You should be seeing patients already" she replied, unperturbed.
"Ok, ok, let us just take off our coats, will you?"
Mark opened the door of the lounge and let Susan in, then he stopped and turned to Kerry. "Look, Kerry, Susan told me about that intubation thing and you should-"
"Mark, due to the nature of your relationship with Susan Lewis, I don't think you're in any position to judge this matter, let alone tell me what to do."
"Are you questioning my ability to deal with residents, Kerry?" Mark asked in disbelief.
"In this specific case, Mark, yes."
Mark shook his head, incredulously. He went into the lounge, where Susan was already changed and sipping some coffee.
"Hurgh! This coffee is so terrible.Benton must have done it." she said throwing it all away.
"You really wanna listen to this, Susan. I told Kerry about your problem with her and she had the gut to tell me I'm not objective about it because of us!"
"I told you this would give us a lot of problems, Mark."
"So far, Kerry is the only person who seems to have a problem with it, and that's not bad considering that probably the whole staff of County knows about it by now."
"She had a problem with me before, she still has one, only that she dragged you into it as well now. I'm sorry about that, Mark."
"Don't be. It was me who helped hire her so you could easily say I am the cause of my own ruin."
"You can say that out loud."
"We'd better get outta here, before she jumps on our back again."
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"You wanna keep it dry for a few days and change the bandages everyday, Mrs. Tingle."
"I feel so stupid, Dr. Lewis."
"No, you're just clumsy, Mrs. Tingle. I always spill things on me, you just happened to spill hot water on your lap, that's all" she replied smiling.
"Thanks a lot, Dr. Lewis."
"Anytime, Mrs. Tingle. Just pay more attention next time you cook pasta."
Susan exited the curtain area. ""Who's next, Jer?" she asked the desk clerk who was approaching her.
"A diabetic man in Exam Two. Dr. Greene also called to remind you of your cruise on the lake for tonight. Said to meet him on the dock at 8:30 sharp."
"So romantic, Susan," said Lydia passing by, holding some emesis basins "it's been four moths already, isn't it?"
"Yeah, four months."
Susan walked into Exam Two, where a fat pouting man was sitting on a bad. He was along time acquaintance of Susan, usually he didn't take insulin on purpose just to come to the ER and be treated by her, needing nothing more than some attention, a sympathetic ear and some TLC.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Jennings. Why did you skip your insulin this time?"
"Dr. Lewis!" he exclaimed, his big, plump face immediately lit up "it's been so long! How good to see you! You don't know about my sister getting remarried then? She had this lovely ceremony-"
"Paul, tell me why you skipped your insulin first."
"I didn't this time. Anyway, I was telling you, the ceremony was lovely, in this little Presbyterian chapel and-"
"Why your glucose was so high, then? You know the rule, Paul, first the P&H and then you get to tell me your news, come on, be a good patient now."
"Okey-dokey, Dr. Lewis. Maybe it was the chocolate."
"What chocolate and how much did you eat?"
"Three or four bars, maybe five. I needed it , Dr. Lewis."
"You know you should follow your regimen, Paul. Diabetes is a serious disease if untreated."
"But my ex-wife was really bugging me. I was depressed. You know chocolate is good for lifting up your spirits, don't you, Dr. Lewis?"
"Yeah, it's known for its antidepressant qualities. But it's no good for your diabetes, got that Paul?"
Mr. Jennings nodded and Susan felt the sudden urge to throw up. "Would you excuse me for a minute?" she said, bringing her hand to her mouth and rushed to the ladies room.
"Hey, I didn't finished telling about my sister's wedding, Dr. Lewis!"
She puked into a stall. Then she went into the lounge, tied a tourniquet to her arm and drew some blood with a syringe. Then she got out of the room and bumped into Haleh, who was just looking for her.
"Dr. Lewis, I-" Haleh stopped "are you ok?"
"Sure, what were you telling me?"
"What do you want me to do on Mr. Jennings? He keeps asking for you, too."
Susan scribbled a couple of tests on the patient's chart then handed the nurse a small container. "Tell him I'll be with him in a minute. Here's the sample."
"Susan!" Carter called out to her.
"What?"
"I need some advice. I've got this patient of mine. I found a four- centimeter aortic aneurysm. Type-three dissection by the Debache classification. No signs of pericardial tamponade. Benton's pushing me for surgery but the patient seems alarmed and not at all happy with it. What would you do?"
"You said four centimeters, right? No appreciable murmur of aortic inefficiency and the aortic valve is normal, I guess? So it still meets the criteria to be treated medically. You surgeons are way too eager to cut people open. Tell Benton you're saving the hospital a few thousands bucks worth of surgery."
"Thanks a lot Susan."
"Anytime, Carter."
"Wanna grab something to eat?" Doug asked her, breezing by.
"No, thanks, I'm not really that hungry, Doug."
"Hey, you look damn pale! You sure you're ok? You still up for Mark's romantic plan for tonight, aren't you?"
"He would kill me if I wasn't, I guess I don't have that much choice."
Haleh interrupted them "We have a fascinoma, here, Dr. Lewis. Lab results on the diabetic are back. Not only is his glucose level normal, but Mr. Jennings's pregnancy test came back positive, too!"
Susan's heart leaped up. "They must have mixed up orders in the lab. I'll write another one and take a new sample, Haleh."
Wendy tapped on Susan's shoulder. "Sorry to interrupt but you have a call, Dr. Lewis."
"Thanks, Wendy. Susan Lewis speaking."
"Hi, big Suz!"
"Chloe?"
"Yeah, it's me, sis!"
"Chloe, I told you a hundred time not to call me at work unless it's an emergency, as in I'm giving birth right now, or our house is burnt to the foundations or little Susie's missing, fro Christ's sake, Chloe! Do we speak the same language or not?"
"Calm down, Suz, little Susie misses you very much. I just wanna know when you're coming visit us again, that's all, big, freaked out sister."
"Yeah, I got freaked out living with you, Chloe. Listen I have some news. I'm pregnant Chloe."
"Wow! It's Mark's isn't it?"
"Of course it is, Chloe!"
"Hey, is it a boy or a girl?"
"I don't know, Chloe, I found out about the pregnancy just today."
"If it's a girl your gonna name her Chloe, right? Anyway, Susie is gonna be so thrilled to have a little cousin. Call me as son as you know more, Suz!"
"I will, Chloe. Give Susie a big hug and a kiss from me, okay?"
"Bye, big Suz! Hey, put the receiver on your stomach, Suz, come on!"
"Chloe, I'm in the hallway in the ER, nobody knows about the baby! They'll think I've gone mad!"
"Come on, come on, do it!"
"Okay" she gave in, walked closer to the wall and put the receiver on her bellybutton.
"Bye little Chloe! It's your aunt, big Chloe, here."
Susan couldn't help but smiling. "Say hello to Joe."
Susan hang up and leaned against the wall, still smiling. Her sister could be crazy but she loved her. She had always known how to make her smile, always. She saw Kerry coming her way and the smile vanished from her lips. Here she comes again.
"Susan, have you seen Carter?"
"I think he's in the Suture room, why?"
"I've got a woman crying with joy in Trauma Two because I've just told her husband has died, only that the man Carter had told me it was her husband, it's not the husband at all!"
"What?" Susan said, laughing "He did it again?"
"Again?"
"The first time Benton told him to give the bad news to the parents of a dead kid he told the wrong parents. It turned out he had misidentified the body."
"Jesus Christ!"
Carter rushed by a few minutes later, cursing under his breath.
"Old habits die hard, huh, Carter?" she told him, chuckling.
"Ah, ah, very funny Susan. Come with me." Carter said, taking her by her hand and dragging her all the way to Trauma Two.
"Slow down, Carter!"
"Look," he said, giving her a picture and uncovering the patient's face "It's him!"
"Carter," Susan said, struggling to fight laughter "Hasn't it ever occurred to you this man could have a twin brother?"
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The gentle yet chilly lake breeze wept Susan's hair over her forehead, and she removed a loc of hair, tucking it under her ear. She was tired and the water lapping lulled her, making her wanting to sleep so much. The lights of Chicago reflected on the black waters of the lake, creating a magic and romantic atmosphere. This was so perfect and she was sorry she wasn't enjoying it as Mark had planned. She didn't want to spoil their moment, but she was a bit worried about the pregnancy thing, and it showed. Mark looked at her almost untouched plate.
"Are you alright, Susan? You hardly ate at all, and you practically didn't say a word."
"I'm just not hungry, Mark. Ok, and worried. But I'm loving this cruise, you know."
"You don't look like it, though, Susan, so you don't have to lie to me."
"Listen, Mark, I need to tell you something."
"I knew something was bothering you, so spill the beans, I'm ready."
"I don't think you are. Ok, here it goes, Mark, I'm pregnant."
"What?" Mark almost choked on his pommes de terre et tomates soup. "I mean, it's wonderful! Wonderful news, how far along are you?"
"Almost five weeks, I think."
"How come you didn't notice before?"
"I've never been regular and we've been careful."
"Not that careful," Mark grinned "Remember that tie in your car, and how about that time in the lounge?"
"Ok, ok."
"Did you have an OB/Gyn take a look at you?"
"I booked an ultrasound with Coburn for the day after tomorrow."
"I don't wanna that witch anywhere my baby!"
"Come on, Mark, she's good!"
"She's still a witch, though. Rach is gonna be so thrilled about having a bay sister."
"What if it's a boy?"
"I guess they'll fight all the time."
"Me and my sister did that a lot too, even if we are both girls. By the way, Chloe called and I told her."
"Good, how's she?" "Looks like she still keeps it together. I hope so much it will last this time."
"It will."
"With Chloe, I've always felt that lower expectations made life easier. Anyway, Susie deserves it, even though you know how much I'd love to take her back."
"You'll have our baby to take care of, now."
"I know."
"I guess I'll have to call Mom and Dad. And Jen, I guess."
"Can't wait to tell Cookie and Dad, too. I can already imagine her face! Not that she was the least bit cooperative with Chloe, you know."
"You won't need her cooperation, this time, I'm here."
"Pay attention to what you say, Mark! Are you actually telling me you'll get up every night at two A.M. to warm up the bottle or change stinky diapers and so on?"
"Hey, I didn't say that! Besides, I already went through that one time."
" I did too."
"We'll take turns, then."
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The pregnancy passed in a blur. Mark was there for Susan through all the morning sickness (why don't they call it 24/7sickness? Susan wondered) , the back pains, the swollen feet and the first Braxton-Hicks. They were planning a mid-March wedding, after the baby was born. They still didn't know the sex, they wanted it to be a surprise. Susan worked until full-terms, sticking to minor cases on a part-time basis for the last two months, per Kerry Weaver's orders. She was working that late February day. She was looking at Mrs. Malloy's x-rays, on a light- board in Exam Three.
"You radius and ulna all appear, although there's a small fracture on one small bone of your wrist. I'll call someone down from Ortho. They'll take a look at it and then I'll put- Ouch!" she suddenly exclaimed.
"What's wrong, Dr. Lewis? Oh no, I knew it, it's cancer, isn't it? Bone cancer. One of those fatal carcinomas or something.How long do I still have?" she asked, starting to sob and wipe. She had been bugging Susan about cancer all the time of her exam, while she had been admitted only for a possible fracture.
"No, Mrs. Malloy, you do not have cancer!" she exclaimed, frustrated. "Now if you will excuse me, I'll call othropedics."
"I know, there's not need for you to keep lying, you can tell me the truth."
"Mrs. Malloy, all you have is a fracture in a small bone in your wrist. Let me tell you this just one more time: you do not have cancer!"
She leapt up when another, stronger twinge of pain flashed through her body "Ouch!"
"What? I knew you weren't telling me the truth! I do have cancer!"
Susan shook her head in exhaustion as she struggled to get to her feet, clutching her enormous belly. "You're fine, Mrs. Malloy, fine. Do we speak the same language? On the contrary, I have trouble, because my water has apparently just broke. Now if you excuse me." Susan slowly waddled out of the room.
She stepped out into the hallway when a gurney rushed in front of her, making her flatten against the wall, for what it was possible to her.
"Watch out! Coming through!"
"Mark! Mark, I need your help!" she called out.
"Susan, can I help you?" Kerry asked, crutching towards her.
"Yeah, but would you please page Mark?" she said as Kerry help her climb up on a gurney "My water broke."
"The big day is here, huh?" Kerry smiled, rubbing her back sympathetically "Lily! Get me an ultrasound and a fetal monitor and page Dr. Greene, stat!"
"Listen, Susan, I know I'm the last person on earth you would wanna me with you now, but I'll check you out and then I'll ship you up to OB right away, ok?" she said compassionately "Lily page, Coburn, too, will you?"
"Kerry, you and I may not get along that well, but I respect you greatly and I know you're a damn fine doctor. I'm glad it's you, I really am, believe it or not."
"Thanks, Susan. How far along are you exactly?"
"Thirty-two weeks, kind of early don't you think?"
"Yeah, not too much, though. Baby here is a little too eager to meet Mommy and Daddy, huh?"
"Ouch! I noticed that."
Kerry spread the gel on Susan's exposed belly and proceeded with the ultrasound. "Baby here is more than fine. Fetal heartbeat is steady and within normal limits. You still don't wanna know the sex, right? I won't spoil you the surprise, don't worry."
"Ok, how about sending me up, Kerry?"
"Coburn isn't here yet and don't you wanna wait for Mark?"
"You bet I want to."
"Heard someone call my name." Mark jogged up to them and kissed Susan on the top of her head. "Hi, honey, how are you doing here?"
"Fetal heartbeat is ok, so does look the baby from the ultrasound. Mom is ok too, her water broke nearly forty-five minutes ago. I gave her pytocin and paged Coburn, who's on her way in."
"Thanks, Kerry. I can take it from here, now."
"No, you can't. It' way too personal. I'm in charge of your wife-to-be's healthcare."
"Kerry, I-"
"Mark, she's right." Susan said, squeezing his hand. "I trust Kerry."
"So do I."
"Hurgh!"
"What was that, Susan?" Mark asked, massaging her back.
"A contraction, that's called a contraction, I thought you had already gone through one of these, Mark, without counting hundreds of patients so- Huuuurgh! This hurts so much!"
"How far apart are they, Susan?"
"Six minutes, I think. Aren't you a doctor for Christ's sake! Huuuurgh!"
"Kerry, we need you in here!"
Kerry rushed to Susan's side and listened to the baby's heart pressing her stethoscope on Susan's stomach. "What's going on here?" she asked "Would you switch that fetal monitor on, please, Mark?"
She checked the screen of both the monitor and the ultrasound and then said "Things are under control but looks like drugs aren't working. Everything's fine, Susan. Things are just speeding up a bit. Where the hell is Coburn?"
"She's stuck in a traffic jam, Dr. Weaver."
"Okay, let's alert OB that we have an imminent delivery coming up and get an anesthesiologist down."
"Huuuurgh!"
" Blow thorough your nose, Susan, blow through your nose, come on, you're doing a great job!" Mark encouraged her. "Do you want me to put on some music, 'the white album', maybe?" "No! I just want an epidural, now!"
"Kerry just called him, hold on, Susan, hold on!"
Janet Coburn, the chief of OB/Gyn, butted her way into the room and peered under Susan's gown, greeting Mark and Kerry with a brief movement of her head. "How is it going Susan? Ok, she's fully dilated and ninety percent effaced. How about contractions?"
"Three minutes apart. Looks like you got here just in time, Janet." Kerry answered.
"Ok, let's bring her up, follow us Dr. Greene"
"I'm right behind you, Susan."
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One hour and half later Mark Greene was holding his baby daughter in his arms. She was so beautiful, she had big green eyes, just like Susan. She was very quiet, she had barely cried even when she had come out of her mother's womb. Mark looked at her with adoringly eyes, he had already fallen in love with her.
"Look at her, Susan, she so beautiful! She's got her mommy's eyes!"
"Yeah, and her daddy's hair, I'm afraid." Susan replied laughing, referring to the baby's almost bald head.
"Your mom's got such a funny sense of humor, don't you think little one, huh?" he said tweaking her plump, pink cheeks. "Look at her, look at her, she's smiling, she does really find you funny, Susan?"
"Difficult to believe, huh?"
"You've got a such a funny mommy, haven't you? Hi funny mommy, hi!" he said gently twisting his daughter's tiny hand in a hello-like gesture. "So, how are we gonna name this little angel, Susan, huh?"
"Chloe wants me to name after her, but I think two Susan in the family is confusing enough already. How about Nancy, do you like it, Mark?"
"Nancy Greene. Sounds good. What do you think, little angel, huh?" he said swirling the baby in the air. She gurgled with excitement, little bubbles of saliva falling on her dad's glasses.
"She likes it. Nancy it is, then." Mark said, drying the glasses with the sleeve of his shirt.
Susan watched mark play with Nancy until the baby eventually was asleep. She didn't get to see that because fatigue had overwhelmed her and she had fallen asleep herself. When she slowly opened her eyes she saw that Mark had dozed off as well, sitting on a chair by her side, his head hanging on his shoulder, which would cause him a bad neck pain later, his glasses threatening to fall off his nose. She smiled and took off Mark's glasses and put them on her nightstand. Right then Nancy started to cry. Feeling sore all over, Susan got up and walked to the crib which was at the other end of the hospital room.
"Oh, no, no, don't cry, my little baby, don't cry" she said as she picked her up. She wasn't wet and it wasn't time for her feeding yet.
Susan started to rock her, to no avail.
"Come on, Nance, what do you want mommy to do? You don't wanna wake daddy up, don't you? Maybe a little singing would help, huh? Your cousin Susie likes it very much. She falls asleep right away. Maybe that's just a self defense system, 'cause I can't really sing, it's still worth a try, though."
And then she started to sing softly " Blackbirds singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly, all your life you're waiting for this day to arrive."
Fine
A/N: I know this is short and lame, but that's what I was thinking the whole time during 'Take these broken wings'. Why didn't Susan just get herself pregnant, if she wanted a baby so badly? And I missed Mark so much. I know there's a lot of people who don't like him and find him extremely boring but I realized how important he was to the ER only when he was gone. Maybe he wasn't quite 'the moral center of the ER', but he certainly was its main figure. I think Mark and Susan were meant to be as well. Not that I don't like Elizabeth, on the contrary I love her, I just think she and Benton had the best chemistry ever, after Doug and Carol.