Beginning of the End
Authors: Starchild and Saavik Chapter Nineteen: There Are No Perfect Men In The World, Only Perfect Intentions.
***Disclaimer*** See Chapter Seven.
When you see // ..// it means the person is thinking and not talking.
****************** Severus turned back into his classroom. He had just 'escorted' Potter out of his dungeons. Now he only need wait for Dumbledore's summons. //Albus is going to be very upset.// He had no sooner thought this than a blast of blue light in bird form streaked into his chamber and hit him over the head. "Coming Albus." The 'bird' promptly flew off into nothingness.
Pondering how to explain his reasoning, Snape quickly made his way toward Albus' office. //Delay would not be wise.// Severus trained his face to be utterly blank and opened the door.
"WHAT where you THINKING!"
"Albus, calm yourself. I never touched Potter."
"You never...Merlin Severus, you goaded him into hitting you! I've been gone for a few weeks and you start boxing with Harry. If you think I'm going to expel him for this you've been hit one to many times with the Cruciatus."
"The first time was once to many, Albus. The next three dozen were sufficient to kill any remaining grip on reality I held. I lost count after that. I think I am doing a wonderful job of holding it together, compared to some. Of course, the Longbottoms never were my favorite people."
"Severus." Albus' tone held a distinct warning note.
Snape sighed. "No, Albus, I don't expect you to expel him. I did this so Harry could get some composure. Allow the boy to vent in what I thought would be a pain free manner. I did not expect Black of having taught him to hit quite so well." Snape rubbed his jaw.
"It wasn't Black. I believe Arthur Weasley can be thanked for that." Snape raised an eyebrow. "And Severus," Albus' eyes regained their twinkle much to Severus's relief, "Harry?"
"Oh sod off Albus."
"hehehehehehehehehe"
"You have a sick mind headmaster." "Minerva doesn't mind."
"I don't even want to think about it. You both were my teachers, the thought is ..disturbing."
"That is why we are discrete."
"Not with the staff."
"You need to get out more Severus. How long has it been since."
Snape cut him off. "THAT is none of your business, HEADMASTER!" Now it was Severus's turn for his eyes to lose there twinkle, what twinkle they normally contained.
"Oh come now, PROFESOR, surely you could go out every once in awhile. Meet someone, dance, play a game of hopscotch?"
Snape glared, than sighed. "Can't. Don't have time, especially now. Have to keep Potter from going dark. He would not be able to handle the side-effects."
"You think he could go dark? I don't see him as the type."
"The nobler the man, the harder it is for him to suspect inferiority in others." Snape muttered under his breath.
"What, Severus, I didn't catch that?"
"Nothing." Albus shook his head. He had heard, but teasing Severus was always worth the effort. Albus watched as Snape squirmed slightly in his seat. //I love reducing grown men to eleven year olds, especially Severus. He does need to lighten up.//
Snape eyed the old wizard. //Bastard heard me, I know he did. Just wants to make me squirm. Damn, I squirmed. How does he DO that!// Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, and cover another squirm, he continued. "He Will Albus if we don't pay attention. And I'm not talking about the Dark Arts really, they might come in handy for him. I don't see Voldemort falling dead from the tickling curse. I'm talking about his very personality, his soul. He could lose himself to his anger and fear, not to mention his hatred. The child carries so much guilt and hates so many: Draco, the Dark Lord, Lucius, myself." At that Dumbledore's eyes went into twinkle overload. "The boy we know could disappear. I do not believe him capable of joining Voldermort, but he could destroy him only to become him."
"Did you ever watch that muggle movie Star Wars I tried to get you to go see a while back?"
"No."
"You sound like Obi Wan. That would make me Yoda and Harry, Luke."
"I am suddenly frightened."
"Hehehehehehe."
"You need a new laugh."
"Lemon drop?"
"Gods, now you're trying to kill me!"
"One bad experience.."
"Is that all Albus, I AM busy."
"Actually no. I need your help with Cat."
"Cats? That's more Hagrid's domain isn't it?"
"Catilyna Jackson, our new muggle studies professor, Cat for short, has a problem."
Snape scowled, "What? Did you hire a vampire now? Need some blood serum, after all I have a bloody werewolf to brew for! What is a little more extremely difficult and time consuming brewing on an already overloaded schedule." Albus smiled. From anyone else such a statement would have seemed like a whine, but Severus made it sound like an everyday statement just like somebody asking for directions.
"No. She is a muggle."
"You mean a muggle-born? Is that wise?"
"No, Severus, she IS a muggle, as in no magic. Perfect for muggle studies. I have always thought we should get a real muggle to teach that." Snape gazed at the headmaster. Albus' tone had been quite and sincere. No hint of mockery or even amusement.
There is a slight pause than a half smile graces the somber potion master. "...Nice joke, almost believed you for a second. You're starting to pick up on my delivery methods and humor. Minerva will be quite upset with me she discovers this."
"Not a joke. We have to hide that fact however. I hate to imagine Lucius' uproar if he found out."
"Not to mention the school boards'. Albus this could endanger the children. I can't believe you would even think about it!" Snape had gone pale and now was almost shaking with the effort of not yelling at Dumbledore and than packing him off the St. Mungos.
"That is why I need your help." Albus paused long enough to take in the fact that Severus was backing very quickly towards the door. Just as he turned to make a run for it, Albus waved his hand and the door disappeared and a solid wall took its place. Snape sat back down and glared his worst at the aged headmaster. Albus just smirked.
Albus continued, "If she is doing a dangerous lesson, I would like you to back her up." Snape's glare intensified to a here unknown level. "And I need to link your abilities to her." Albus waited. The vein on the younger man's head had started to not only throb but to raise itself a full three centimeters and stay there. Albus was actually worried he may have pushed his friend into having a stroke.
Suddenly Snape regained enough thought to croak out his response, "NO." His voice was not raised but Albus suspected Minerva heard him in the kitchens. His tone was as cold as ice and held no illusion to the fact that if Albus was not the only reason for his continued existence the old man would now be dead.
Albus sat up straighter and steepled his fingers, "Now Severus."
"Voldermort will wear your pink bunny slippers first."
"I'll send him a pair. Do you have his current address? I seem to have misplaced it."
"Albus!"
"Do this and I won't put it in your record that you provoked a student to violence."
"But.."
Albus let his shoulders slope and his true age show itself. "Severus, I need you. I would do this myself, but my strength is stretched to thin as it is. The school wards are taking more than I can afford to give as it stands. You are simply the only other choice. The other professors do not have enough power to be able to lend any more out. They 're doing do more by pooling their strength for the wards. Together they can give more than individually. Your power is, well, on a different wavelength than ours. We have discussed this before. You can't combine with us on the wards, so I ask you to do this. It will be no more of a drain than the others are giving, I promise. And it is only temporary till I can figure something else out." //If the need arises.//
Snape looked at the headmaster sideways. //The bastard is willing to black mail me into this. And he brings up my 'wave length'. Why doesn't he just say it. My power base is dark, well darker. It doesn't like to mix with the giggle filled staff power. It tends to upset their balance. Just my luck. He is serious about this. He is not taking no for an answer. I could move back home. For the thirty-five seconds I would live after stepping outside. Shit.//
"I assume it will be limited to a FEW basic spells and bound to a SINGLE wand spelled to ONLY work for her?"
"Yes, of course. I would not risk a link to your power falling into the wrong hands. Not only could it drain you, but you are quite powerful Severus. Equal to me in strength if not in direction. Olivander is aware of the situation and is awaiting you. The only people in England that know what she is are in this room and Olivander himself. I am not even informing Minerva."
"Oh joy. You know she will find out. Than blame you for lying to her and you well get all grumpy from lack of 'quality' time."
"That is Minerva's favorite way to punish me. Although Poppy is always willing to help."
"ALBUS!"
"Sorry. To much information?" At Snape's exasperated nod, Dumbledore turned serious.
"She needs our protection Severus. For more than the children's sakes." The headmaster than filled Severus in on the attack and his suspicions concerning Stephan's involvement. But not on his possible Malfoy connection. Snape had once been close to Lucius, like brothers. Albus did not want to put Severus in any more of an awkward position than he already was in. Albus knew Severus kept some of his and Lucius' actions as Deatheaters private, for the other man's protection. Albus only wished that Lucius had that kind of loyalty. If he did Severus would have a far less extensive understanding of the Cruciatus Curse, to start with.
Reluctantly, and only after extensive blackmailing, Snape agreed to help with the scam. Albus waved Snape goodbye and replaced the door. Severus stormed out and went to look for his new 'partner'.
Albus leaned heavily on his desk as Severus left the room. He had not been lying about the drain to his power. All the travel he had done over the summer added to the constant stain of maintaining the Hogwarts security measures was making him weak. Albus sat down quickly and let a small moan escape him. //If the others knew how much it hurt to just move sometimes, well, they would lock me up in my bedroom. Alone. That would not be good for me. Or the war.// A shadow passed over the headmaster's face. //I hope Severus is wrong about Harry. He would be the first to see the signs, however. I hope he knows what he is doing. And he is right. Harry would never be able to handle the knowledge that comes with the Dark Arts. Nor the responsibility. It eats away at you, tempts you. The power can be hard to resist. The control it seems to offer, the stability. Things Harry craves even if he will not admit it to himself. Some can handle that power, like Severus. Others loss touch with themselves. The guilt kills a part of them, like it killed Lucius. Oh, Severus, guide him. Teach him what I can not, what I can never touch again, not after.. Enough to keep him from becoming intrigued, but not enough to give him a taste.// With that thought, Dumbledore staggered off to bed hoping Minerva would come along in an hour or so to help with his tension. Thoughts of the past and all the regrets he harbored haunted the wizard long into the night.
A/N: Don't understand the Dark Arts stuff? Email questions to saavik13@yahoo.com or leave it in a review. I will answer them all in the next posting. I am shaping this off of a Star Warzian kinda line of thought. Here the difference between light and dark is not necessarily the spell, but the intention behind it. What Snape is saying is that Harry might not use dark magic, but his intentions could turn dark. And the thing with power, lets just say that in my version of the HP universe each witch or wizard has his or her own power signature. Some are good at one thing, some another. Severus' power is out of alignment with the other teachers. Like AC and DC current, they both can't power the same appliance without a lot of adapters. So Albus gives him a different task.
And the whole side-effects thing, is well complex. We know that DA potions contain questionable ingredients. Like unicorn blood, bone of your father, blood of your enemy. Harry would have a problem getting virgin's blood unwillingly taken. He would not be sneaky enough to cast a sleeping spell and siphon off some. He would assume the worst. So in my world DA's can be done without actually causing harm if you think about it and want to bad enough. Harry would not be able to do that. And he would still feel guilty even if he could. It is the way he is. You know Snape would get over it. Harry wouldn't. Plus any spell can be used for good, even the killing curse, and any spell can be used for evil, even the jelly legs curse. It is all arbitrary.
Sorry for the long note. Felt like it needed an explanation. And I like to rant.
LL&P Saavik
Authors: Starchild and Saavik Chapter Nineteen: There Are No Perfect Men In The World, Only Perfect Intentions.
***Disclaimer*** See Chapter Seven.
When you see // ..// it means the person is thinking and not talking.
****************** Severus turned back into his classroom. He had just 'escorted' Potter out of his dungeons. Now he only need wait for Dumbledore's summons. //Albus is going to be very upset.// He had no sooner thought this than a blast of blue light in bird form streaked into his chamber and hit him over the head. "Coming Albus." The 'bird' promptly flew off into nothingness.
Pondering how to explain his reasoning, Snape quickly made his way toward Albus' office. //Delay would not be wise.// Severus trained his face to be utterly blank and opened the door.
"WHAT where you THINKING!"
"Albus, calm yourself. I never touched Potter."
"You never...Merlin Severus, you goaded him into hitting you! I've been gone for a few weeks and you start boxing with Harry. If you think I'm going to expel him for this you've been hit one to many times with the Cruciatus."
"The first time was once to many, Albus. The next three dozen were sufficient to kill any remaining grip on reality I held. I lost count after that. I think I am doing a wonderful job of holding it together, compared to some. Of course, the Longbottoms never were my favorite people."
"Severus." Albus' tone held a distinct warning note.
Snape sighed. "No, Albus, I don't expect you to expel him. I did this so Harry could get some composure. Allow the boy to vent in what I thought would be a pain free manner. I did not expect Black of having taught him to hit quite so well." Snape rubbed his jaw.
"It wasn't Black. I believe Arthur Weasley can be thanked for that." Snape raised an eyebrow. "And Severus," Albus' eyes regained their twinkle much to Severus's relief, "Harry?"
"Oh sod off Albus."
"hehehehehehehehehe"
"You have a sick mind headmaster." "Minerva doesn't mind."
"I don't even want to think about it. You both were my teachers, the thought is ..disturbing."
"That is why we are discrete."
"Not with the staff."
"You need to get out more Severus. How long has it been since."
Snape cut him off. "THAT is none of your business, HEADMASTER!" Now it was Severus's turn for his eyes to lose there twinkle, what twinkle they normally contained.
"Oh come now, PROFESOR, surely you could go out every once in awhile. Meet someone, dance, play a game of hopscotch?"
Snape glared, than sighed. "Can't. Don't have time, especially now. Have to keep Potter from going dark. He would not be able to handle the side-effects."
"You think he could go dark? I don't see him as the type."
"The nobler the man, the harder it is for him to suspect inferiority in others." Snape muttered under his breath.
"What, Severus, I didn't catch that?"
"Nothing." Albus shook his head. He had heard, but teasing Severus was always worth the effort. Albus watched as Snape squirmed slightly in his seat. //I love reducing grown men to eleven year olds, especially Severus. He does need to lighten up.//
Snape eyed the old wizard. //Bastard heard me, I know he did. Just wants to make me squirm. Damn, I squirmed. How does he DO that!// Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, and cover another squirm, he continued. "He Will Albus if we don't pay attention. And I'm not talking about the Dark Arts really, they might come in handy for him. I don't see Voldemort falling dead from the tickling curse. I'm talking about his very personality, his soul. He could lose himself to his anger and fear, not to mention his hatred. The child carries so much guilt and hates so many: Draco, the Dark Lord, Lucius, myself." At that Dumbledore's eyes went into twinkle overload. "The boy we know could disappear. I do not believe him capable of joining Voldermort, but he could destroy him only to become him."
"Did you ever watch that muggle movie Star Wars I tried to get you to go see a while back?"
"No."
"You sound like Obi Wan. That would make me Yoda and Harry, Luke."
"I am suddenly frightened."
"Hehehehehehe."
"You need a new laugh."
"Lemon drop?"
"Gods, now you're trying to kill me!"
"One bad experience.."
"Is that all Albus, I AM busy."
"Actually no. I need your help with Cat."
"Cats? That's more Hagrid's domain isn't it?"
"Catilyna Jackson, our new muggle studies professor, Cat for short, has a problem."
Snape scowled, "What? Did you hire a vampire now? Need some blood serum, after all I have a bloody werewolf to brew for! What is a little more extremely difficult and time consuming brewing on an already overloaded schedule." Albus smiled. From anyone else such a statement would have seemed like a whine, but Severus made it sound like an everyday statement just like somebody asking for directions.
"No. She is a muggle."
"You mean a muggle-born? Is that wise?"
"No, Severus, she IS a muggle, as in no magic. Perfect for muggle studies. I have always thought we should get a real muggle to teach that." Snape gazed at the headmaster. Albus' tone had been quite and sincere. No hint of mockery or even amusement.
There is a slight pause than a half smile graces the somber potion master. "...Nice joke, almost believed you for a second. You're starting to pick up on my delivery methods and humor. Minerva will be quite upset with me she discovers this."
"Not a joke. We have to hide that fact however. I hate to imagine Lucius' uproar if he found out."
"Not to mention the school boards'. Albus this could endanger the children. I can't believe you would even think about it!" Snape had gone pale and now was almost shaking with the effort of not yelling at Dumbledore and than packing him off the St. Mungos.
"That is why I need your help." Albus paused long enough to take in the fact that Severus was backing very quickly towards the door. Just as he turned to make a run for it, Albus waved his hand and the door disappeared and a solid wall took its place. Snape sat back down and glared his worst at the aged headmaster. Albus just smirked.
Albus continued, "If she is doing a dangerous lesson, I would like you to back her up." Snape's glare intensified to a here unknown level. "And I need to link your abilities to her." Albus waited. The vein on the younger man's head had started to not only throb but to raise itself a full three centimeters and stay there. Albus was actually worried he may have pushed his friend into having a stroke.
Suddenly Snape regained enough thought to croak out his response, "NO." His voice was not raised but Albus suspected Minerva heard him in the kitchens. His tone was as cold as ice and held no illusion to the fact that if Albus was not the only reason for his continued existence the old man would now be dead.
Albus sat up straighter and steepled his fingers, "Now Severus."
"Voldermort will wear your pink bunny slippers first."
"I'll send him a pair. Do you have his current address? I seem to have misplaced it."
"Albus!"
"Do this and I won't put it in your record that you provoked a student to violence."
"But.."
Albus let his shoulders slope and his true age show itself. "Severus, I need you. I would do this myself, but my strength is stretched to thin as it is. The school wards are taking more than I can afford to give as it stands. You are simply the only other choice. The other professors do not have enough power to be able to lend any more out. They 're doing do more by pooling their strength for the wards. Together they can give more than individually. Your power is, well, on a different wavelength than ours. We have discussed this before. You can't combine with us on the wards, so I ask you to do this. It will be no more of a drain than the others are giving, I promise. And it is only temporary till I can figure something else out." //If the need arises.//
Snape looked at the headmaster sideways. //The bastard is willing to black mail me into this. And he brings up my 'wave length'. Why doesn't he just say it. My power base is dark, well darker. It doesn't like to mix with the giggle filled staff power. It tends to upset their balance. Just my luck. He is serious about this. He is not taking no for an answer. I could move back home. For the thirty-five seconds I would live after stepping outside. Shit.//
"I assume it will be limited to a FEW basic spells and bound to a SINGLE wand spelled to ONLY work for her?"
"Yes, of course. I would not risk a link to your power falling into the wrong hands. Not only could it drain you, but you are quite powerful Severus. Equal to me in strength if not in direction. Olivander is aware of the situation and is awaiting you. The only people in England that know what she is are in this room and Olivander himself. I am not even informing Minerva."
"Oh joy. You know she will find out. Than blame you for lying to her and you well get all grumpy from lack of 'quality' time."
"That is Minerva's favorite way to punish me. Although Poppy is always willing to help."
"ALBUS!"
"Sorry. To much information?" At Snape's exasperated nod, Dumbledore turned serious.
"She needs our protection Severus. For more than the children's sakes." The headmaster than filled Severus in on the attack and his suspicions concerning Stephan's involvement. But not on his possible Malfoy connection. Snape had once been close to Lucius, like brothers. Albus did not want to put Severus in any more of an awkward position than he already was in. Albus knew Severus kept some of his and Lucius' actions as Deatheaters private, for the other man's protection. Albus only wished that Lucius had that kind of loyalty. If he did Severus would have a far less extensive understanding of the Cruciatus Curse, to start with.
Reluctantly, and only after extensive blackmailing, Snape agreed to help with the scam. Albus waved Snape goodbye and replaced the door. Severus stormed out and went to look for his new 'partner'.
Albus leaned heavily on his desk as Severus left the room. He had not been lying about the drain to his power. All the travel he had done over the summer added to the constant stain of maintaining the Hogwarts security measures was making him weak. Albus sat down quickly and let a small moan escape him. //If the others knew how much it hurt to just move sometimes, well, they would lock me up in my bedroom. Alone. That would not be good for me. Or the war.// A shadow passed over the headmaster's face. //I hope Severus is wrong about Harry. He would be the first to see the signs, however. I hope he knows what he is doing. And he is right. Harry would never be able to handle the knowledge that comes with the Dark Arts. Nor the responsibility. It eats away at you, tempts you. The power can be hard to resist. The control it seems to offer, the stability. Things Harry craves even if he will not admit it to himself. Some can handle that power, like Severus. Others loss touch with themselves. The guilt kills a part of them, like it killed Lucius. Oh, Severus, guide him. Teach him what I can not, what I can never touch again, not after.. Enough to keep him from becoming intrigued, but not enough to give him a taste.// With that thought, Dumbledore staggered off to bed hoping Minerva would come along in an hour or so to help with his tension. Thoughts of the past and all the regrets he harbored haunted the wizard long into the night.
A/N: Don't understand the Dark Arts stuff? Email questions to saavik13@yahoo.com or leave it in a review. I will answer them all in the next posting. I am shaping this off of a Star Warzian kinda line of thought. Here the difference between light and dark is not necessarily the spell, but the intention behind it. What Snape is saying is that Harry might not use dark magic, but his intentions could turn dark. And the thing with power, lets just say that in my version of the HP universe each witch or wizard has his or her own power signature. Some are good at one thing, some another. Severus' power is out of alignment with the other teachers. Like AC and DC current, they both can't power the same appliance without a lot of adapters. So Albus gives him a different task.
And the whole side-effects thing, is well complex. We know that DA potions contain questionable ingredients. Like unicorn blood, bone of your father, blood of your enemy. Harry would have a problem getting virgin's blood unwillingly taken. He would not be sneaky enough to cast a sleeping spell and siphon off some. He would assume the worst. So in my world DA's can be done without actually causing harm if you think about it and want to bad enough. Harry would not be able to do that. And he would still feel guilty even if he could. It is the way he is. You know Snape would get over it. Harry wouldn't. Plus any spell can be used for good, even the killing curse, and any spell can be used for evil, even the jelly legs curse. It is all arbitrary.
Sorry for the long note. Felt like it needed an explanation. And I like to rant.
LL&P Saavik