Disclaimer- I wish.
A/n- O_____O minna-san… I'm actually continuing PgP desu! I dunno if anyone will read or review this, but plz, plz do ;_; or I'll cry desu~ ! I want at least five this time D Uhm, if any of you nicesh ppl out dere are concerned over my welfare, dun worry, it wasn't because Saitou and Usui finally got to me that I discontinued this. It was cuz I onlee got a few reviews last chapter ;o; so I got discouraged and yeah… I feel lyke I'm pushing it lots though ;-; so, make meh happi and give meh reviews~~~! D
Uhm, after much consideration, Saitou and Usui have decided to continue hunting meh… more at the end of the ficcie!
Pillow Grand Pree: Round Nine"How is this possible…"
"Just one little brat defeated Hennya…"
Yahiko, though greatly battered and bleeding heavily, stood up and yelled, "Alright! There's only two of 'em left!"
Kaoru and Misao looked on with ecstatic expressions, but it quickly turned to those of horror when Yahiko staggered violently.
"Let's…get them all…at once…" with that he fell heavily to the ground.
"Yahiko!" Kaoru cried out in alarm.
"What did I tell you?" Kamatari chuckled, "You'll all die in the end no matter what." He exchanged eye contact with Kaoru.
"Kaoru!" Misao said, indicating Yahiko.
"Don't worry." Kaoru replied, she hoped she sounded confident, "Yahiko doesn't die that easily. But we have to be careful—because it's our turn now!"
"Hm!" Kamatari advanced slowly, turned his pillow-scythe from one hand to another, "Looks like you're a bit different from that little girl."
"Little gi—" Misao started, become angry-SD again.
Kaoru shoved her hand onto Misao's face, "You're wrong. We're just about the same."
Misao stifled a "Meep!".
"It's just that I tell myself, when I tie the black belt, and put on the gi, I'm a warrior." Kaoru continued, "And if I'm a warrior, there's no difference of sex. On this meaning, I suppose you're just the same."
"Perhaps." Kamatari replied. "But, if we're talking about skill, there's a big difference."
Kaoru turned back to Misao (who was rubbing her nose), "Misao-chan, look at that person's weapon."
"You mean the pillow scythe, whattabout it?" Misao flicked her nose, making sure it wasn't broken.
"I'd say its weight is probably around forty pounds. One of those mega-heavy pillows." Kaoru continued.
Misao made a face, "How could pillows be that heavy?"
"Stuffed with metal feathers." Kaoru replied matter-of-factly.
"Ah." Misao nodded.
"Anyhoo," Kaoru went on, "although those mega-heavy pillows cover a lot of ground, it leaves also leaves a lot of space for us to attack. I'll elicit him to attack, forcing him to swing that big pillow. And now you take this chance to attack his most essential part."
Misao murmured, "…his most essential part…ah~gross-out!!!" It's time fer revenge, e-ha-ha-ha!
Kamatari grinned," Alright! Enough chitchatting! Bring it on, you two!"
Kaoru attacked first, lunging at Kamatari with her pillow, "It goes without saying, doesn't it?!"
Kamatari only smiled. "HEEYA!" he swung his pillow down.
"Gotcha!" Kaoru stuck her pillow in the ground and jumped up, "NOW! Misao-chan!"
"Got it!!!" Misao jumped forward, You're dead!
But then… a ball-shaped pillow stuffed with lead hit Misao right on the ribs.
"MISAO-CHAN!" Kaoru shouted, screeching to a stop.
Misao was hurled to the lower roof of the Aoiya, barely conscious. "Ahn…"
Kamatari smirked. "Understanding the weakness of mega-heavy pillow are a plus, and I congratulate you for that. Unfortunately that doesn't work against me. Even though my nickname is Kamatari of the Big Scythe, the ball pillow is actually my real weapon. Its secret is in the way I swing the pillow scythe. Also," Kamatari began to swing the pillow-scythe in rapid, differing strokes.
"There it is!" a soldier exclaimed!
"Kamatari-san's secret attack—Chaos of the Heavens*!" another delcared.
Kamatari looked menacingly at Kaoru, "Everything that this pillow touches will be pounded to death. I'm warning you right here and now, nothing can penetrate this attack.
*Chaos of the Heavens – again, one of CySer's infamous literal translations XD; sorry to all yew Japanese nuts (cuz I'm one too D, whenever I watch anime on DVD, I force everyone who watches with me to watch it in Japanese wif subs, and never, never dubbed D dub ish eville) desu… plz don't throw any more stones at me… XD;
~*meanwhile, w/Misao-chan*~
Misao……who is it?
Misao!
Who's voice is it??Battousai stayed true to his promise. A visage of Hannya appeared before Misao's eyes. Aoshi-sama…is coming home.
Misao blinked…and the image disappeared. Right… the person that was always taking care of bumbling, follow-Aoshi-sama me, it's Hannya-san… Hannya-san… even at the last of the last* he took care of me, came to see me…
KRRRRACK!Kamatari was swinging at Kaoru with large, side-sweeping strokes.
"Kaoru-san!" Misao cried, then cringed. "Dammit…my ribs…" I can't fight anymore… but! To tell me this, to tell me to just sit here and watch the Aoiya get destroyed—is impossible! Misao stood up, her firt full of her pillow-kunai** But that stance he has… it's really hard to shoot at him from there. So the only place to get him would be—! "KAORU-SAN!" Misao yelled, "Aim!!" and with that Misao shot her kunai.
"It's useless." Kamatari smirked. He flung the kunai off with the pole of the pillow-scythe.
Kaoru swung back her pillow—
"I've told you time and time again it's useless!" Kamatari grinned and swung upwards, towards Kaoru. But as a result, since Misao's pillow kunai was stuck between the pillow and pillow-scythe, and—
The kunai went right thru the pillow-scythe and did absolutely no damage at all except to pierce a hole in the pillow-scythe.
"Great plan, Misao." Kaoru said sarcastically to Misao up on roof.
Misao stuck her tongue out, "Let's see you try coming up with something better."
Kamatari sweatdropped, "This…wasn't exactly in the script, was it, guys?"
Misao shook her head. "Nyope."
Kaoru sighed. "So. Waddya we do?"
Kamatari grabs manga #15 outta hammerspace. "Well, according to this, my pillow-scythe should break, so…" he ripped his pillow scythe in half, splintering metal feathers here and there. "Oh, that wasn't so smart."
Kaoru started laughing hysterically, "Y-you've got a flat pillow now!!"
Kamatari made a face, "Shit."
Misao grabbed her own manga#15 outta hammerspace, "Uhm, I think it's my turn to say, 'Aoshi-sama's finally coming back, I shouldn't cause more trouble for Hannya-san!' Yeah."
"What the hey?" Kaoru squinted.
"Bad translations by CySer is all." Misao shrugged.
CySer bursted in, "What the HEY are you guys doing?!?! Go according to the bloody script!" She shook her own manga #15.
Kaoru gasped, "Is this…what they call the fabled SELF-INSERT?! I expected you to be above that, Cy-chan!"
CySer shrugged, "Self-insert's only bad if you made yourself beautiful and glamourous in the fic, but in this case I'm only trying to get these stinking actors to work with me again."
Kamatari, vein popping, "Are you calling me a stinking actor?"
CySer turned on Kamatari and glomped him, "Of course not, honey-poo~!!!"
"You disgust me." Misao "bleaugh"ed.
Kaoru sighed. "Why are we wasting valuable time here?"
CySer murmured while still coddling a reluctant Kamatari, "Trying to make fic seem longer be all…"
*last of the last – saying lyke, after you die or sumshing similar.
**pillow kunai – I was stumped fer a while, then decided them to be kunai-shaped pillows D yesh I'm lazy.
~* after a while and some skippings… *~
Kamatari: No matter how hard I try, I'll never be as good as Yumi, who spends her nights with men. On the other hand, no matter how hard I train, I'll never beat Soujiro, the best of the Juppon-Gattana. I can't fulfill the best role of either man or woman for Shishio-sama! "And so to fill my endless longing for Shishio-sama, I must at least perform the task he gave me! I, Kamatari, will sacrifice everything to help Shishio-sama! Don't think you girls can talk me out of this!!!"
Misao and Kaoru were shocked. "…"
Kamatari stuck his broken (and quite flat) pillow-scythe onto his chains. "Honjou ryu, Happiness Below the Heavens*!" he leapt up, spinning the chain around the scythe.
Kaoru ducked under the spinning pillow and dove for Kamatari's knee. Kamiya Ryu, Agoknee**! The pillow connected with Kamatari's kneecap and…did absolutely nothing once more.
"GAWDS!" Kaoru screamed. "Whoever made this stupid fic up, you oughta think thru yer manga before writing it up!!!"
(a/n- but I do… sniffle sniffle Kaoru-chan sho mean…)
Kamatari sighed, "Uhm, let's just say you suffocated my kneecap with your pillow."
"Yeah! Great thinking!" Kaoru clapped, and did just so. "Uhm, lessee, my line was…" grabs manga #15 outta hammerspace again "Oh yeah!" she cleared her throat, "Gomen nasai. I promised Kenshin…I promised Kenshin that everyone would go back to Kyoto, safe and sound. Please take all your soldiers back to your HQ! We'll wrap up those unable to walk, including you."
"Hn! Who are you kidding?" Kamatari snorted, "Telling me to go see Shishio-sama in this state…" he flipped out a mini-pillow. "I'd rather die." And stuffed the pillow to his face.
Misao wrenched the pillow away from him and smacked him over the head with it.
"You little…" Kamatari glowered, and toppled onto Kaoru, unconscious.
"Even though I don't really understand the feelings of a crossdresser nor do I really like him, but wanting to help someone you love… that I can get." Misao smiled.
Kaoru looked at Kamatari with soft eyes, "Same here…"
Little Unimportant Soldier #1: …how is this possible…?
Little Unimportant Soldier #2: after Hennya-sama…even Kamatari-sama… how can two of the Juppon-Gattana be defeated in the hands of mere womenfolk and children?
Little Unimportant Soldier #3: D-don't worry everybody! We still have Iwanbou-sama! Iwanbou-sama's still working hard!
Little Unimportant Soldier #4: Iwanbou-sama!
Little Unimportant Soldier #5: Iwanbou-sama!
Iwanbou turned his head, grinng with snot coming outta his nose (o_O;), "Ahuh?"
Little Unimportant SoldierS: O____O; We're dead! We all gotta run! Retreat! everyone runs off
Iwanbou scratched his butt (o_o;), "Oopoo***~" he turned to Omasu and Okon, "Oopoo~" to Shiro and Kuro, "Oopoo~" then turned his head 180 degrees to Kaoru and Misa (who were behind him), "Oopoo~"
Misao and Kaoru: O_O!!!
Misao, freaked out, pointed at Iwanbou, "D-did he just do what I thought he did?"
Kaoru, sweatdropping, "I'm sure it was just a figment of your imagination…"
"Oopoo~" Iwanbou scratched his head, then spazzed out, "OOPOO!!!" and with that he literally "bounced" off.
Omasu and Okon shouted, "Ah! He ran away~!"
Okina smiled, "Don't chase him. We've reached our goal. Minna-san, good work. We've won fair and square."
"Yeah! Victory!" Misao make a V sign.
Just then a giant shadow came over the Aoiya and mousy voice cackled, "I see… so Hennya and Kamatari both failed… Good!" a sword cut thru the Aoiya, and Fuji and a mousy-dude**** appeared before them.
*Happiness Below the Heavens - sigh again, another literal translation. Stone me all you want. I deserve it x_x
**Agoknee – another literal translation and a bad pun at that. XD;
***oopoo – don't ask… that's how they had it in mai manga o_O;
****mousy-dude – I need his name XD; anyone knoes it?
A/n- haaaaaa. Ish 11:30 pm aite now and ish a school nite. Not good XD; some of yew ppl are asking… is CySer coming back to ff.net? Well, maybe. If ppl are still interested in mai fics, course I'll go on. If no one be interested, CySer be gone again this time for indefinitely ;-;
So if yew want me to stay, review desu!!
Saitou-Usui issue: since I have moved, I dun dink they can find meh anymore D and plus, I got mai special attack! Mai T-Rex, Spot, will hold them off! and I also have some Chii (Chobits…awesome manga ! CLAMP fans must-read-read!!) figurines I can throw at them if they come any closer… or mai EVA unit 01 figurine, or mai various sets of manga XD; [ooch, the Evangelion artbook has GOTTA hurt XDDD;]
Well… :F boredies. Should I go to sleep? Prolly… hey who's knocking at mai window…? AUGHHHH! SPOOOOTTTTT!!!
Saitou and Usui jump in window and starts hacking everything up
"and THAT's for mai wimpy death!"
"AKU-SOKU-ZAN!"
NoOOO! NOT MAI FRUITS BASKET DVD!! gasp DROP MAI EXCEL SAGA POSTER NOW, USUI! EEEEKS, NOT KURAPICA! AUGH!! OMIIIII!!! STOPPIT! LEAVE KAMUI ALONE! NO! NOT KURONEKOSAMA~!!! THAT'S EIGHT BUCKS AND A TRIP TO ANIME EXPO, BUDDY!
Oh yea. Later dayz!!!
CyberSerpent .~