Author's note: Wow, I had no idea that u guys really liked this story
so much! When I read back what I had wrote, I was all 'Oh man, stop it.
This is abysmal.' Hehe, I still think that despite what u guys think. And
plz keep on reviewing, coz if I start to suck even more (which is literally
impossible, coz I already suck so much) I want to know.
And. do people wake from comas? Well, I think they do and I don't care. I'm gonna wake Abby up this chapter! I have to give her a chapter!!!
Disclaimer: If I'm gonna say this once more, I'll go insane. I really would. Once again, I don't own anyone in this fic(ER)!!!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 4. Don't cry my baby, don't cry
Abby's POV
The world is a total blackness to me. I seemed to be traveling a long, dark tunnel, a tunnel that will never end. Kind of like those tunnels you see on TV, when the main character travels through time, only this tunnel is darker, sadder, and endless.
Picture, snapshots of my life were whizzing past me. The moment I got hit by the car, the day Carter and I finally got married, our first real date, and our first kiss back in the quarantine ward, the first sip of alcohol I took after rehab, the days when Luka and I dated, and so on. Then suddenly, a bright light appeared in front of me. This is it. I thought. This is the light people see right before they die. The holy light that led to the gates of heaven.
The light got brighter and brighter, until it got totally unbearable. I couldn't stand it any more and closed my eyes. When I open them again, I totally expected to see an angel in front of me, quizzing me to see if I go to hell or heaven, though all I see was a blurry shadow in front of me. It didn't take me long to figure out who it was.
I opened my dry, parched lips to call out to him, only to find a tube running down my throat, a cruel obstruction.
I blinked a few times and the fuzz began to clear. He was sleeping, his face of an innocent child's. I lifted my heavy arm to stoke his hair, to pat him affectionately. I was careful not to wake him up, though I so wanted to.
In my whole life, I had never shared much of my feelings to anyone. I kept everything to myself. You may think I am a loner, I am. I don't want anyone to pity me, to fell sad and sorry for me. After Richard, I was afraid. Afraid to fall in love and end up in a divorce.. until I met Carter. He is the pillar of my life. The first time I met him, I knew he was the one I could pour out my feelings to. But I didn't, I couldn't and wouldn't.
He stirred and woke, and saw that I was conscious. He scrambled up like and eager child. "Abby" he called out to me. I love the way he calls my name, full of love and tenderness, and yet this time, it was full of pain. I'm sorry that I woke him up, making him face the harsh reality.
"How are you feeling? Are you okay?" That's him, so serious yet so sweet. I'm not feeling good Carter, it hurts, it hurts so much. The morphine and painkillers aren't working. They can never relieve the aching in my heart. I'm dying Carter, I wouldn't live much longer.
"What? Abby, what are you trying to say? Damn these tubes. I don't know what to do, Abby, god help me." He groaned, as if he's the one that had been hit. "Would somebody get these fucking tubes out of you?" He's screaming now, and getting all emotional. I watched sadly as he slammed his fists into everything. Don't hurt yourself, don't do this to me. I plead silently. With all the strength I could muster, I reached out for him arm.
He looked into my eyes, and I gazed back. I opened his palm and with the little strength I had left, I wrote three little words in the middle of his palm.
"I love you." So little yet so much. It said all I wanted to say. It meant everything to me. I love you, Carter. I love you from the bottom of my heart. Even if I died, my love for you would never die.
"God Abby, I love you too. Stay with me. Please, please Abby, don't leave me behind. I'll never live without you." Tears, clear as crystal, were forming in his eyes.
'Sticks and stones will hurt my bones but words will never hurt me.' But Carter's words did. It pierced into my heart, slicing it into two. My heart is broken. Those four words, "Don't leave me behind." will hurt me forever. I'm abandoning him, leaving him behind in this cold, cruel world.
I could stand it no more. I pulled open his palm again and told him I'm sorry. In the past, I had done so many things that I regret now. The least I can do now is to apologize to Carter, I had to let him know that I'm sorry.
He sobbed, truly sobbed. It was the first time and probably the last time I see Carter cry. A single tear ran down my cheek. I squeezed him on the arm, trying to reassure him that I'd be okay. I could be brave for you Carter.
Something is forcing my eyelids to close. My breathing became short and rough, though oddly, I felt nothing. I know I'm dying, I can literally feel my soul slipping away from my body. Don't watch me die Carter, don't. Tears are flowing down my cheeks now, just like the energy that is draining out of my body. Slowly, my eyelids closed, and once again, there was nothing but darkness. Though this time, I felt even lonelier than before.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Oh. I tried my very best to make this sound sad. Am I cruel or what? Please guys, please, please review. I had put a lot of time in this! Seriously, I did. Well okay, not THAT much time. Practices are taking up most of my spare time. 3 hours of practice today, can you believe it?
Thank you for these ppo who were kind enough to review.
Karen Faye ( *Widen eyes in amazement* Chapter 2 was good? Wow, I wouldn't say that! Hehe. I admit that Chapter 3 is better than Chapter 2, but still, I isn't that great. Thanks for reading.
CARBYfan & c ( Are you two the same person? Well it doesn't matter. Thanks. I would like to make this clear to everyone, Abby may not be dead yet, so don't be sad and stop reading!
MeganStar ( Haha. I know people like to kill Abby, coz we're all merciless murderers! Lol. j/k But then, as I said, Abby may not be dead. Read on and you'll see. Thanks. CARBYluva313( Yeah, I liked Lucy when she was on the show, but I'm not a carcy fan. Still, I thought it would be sweet to include her in Carter's pain, if that makes any sense. Thanks and here's your chapter!
SpookyAnne ( Thanks and as a reward, I'm presenting you this brand new chapter. Believe me, it was hard to write!
Carbygirl05( Thanks so much for reading this and thanks for all the compliments. I don't know if it's really that great though. Thanks and keep reading to see if Abby died or not.
Yay. 6 reviews (or 7) that's better. Thank you. Have you ever wondered if the actual cast of ER will take the time and come and read our stories? The thought just came to me yesterday! It would be so great if they actually come and read what we write! You probably think I'm crazy or what but hey, that could happen!
Yeah right. Fat chance. Dream on.
~JeSs~
And. do people wake from comas? Well, I think they do and I don't care. I'm gonna wake Abby up this chapter! I have to give her a chapter!!!
Disclaimer: If I'm gonna say this once more, I'll go insane. I really would. Once again, I don't own anyone in this fic(ER)!!!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 4. Don't cry my baby, don't cry
Abby's POV
The world is a total blackness to me. I seemed to be traveling a long, dark tunnel, a tunnel that will never end. Kind of like those tunnels you see on TV, when the main character travels through time, only this tunnel is darker, sadder, and endless.
Picture, snapshots of my life were whizzing past me. The moment I got hit by the car, the day Carter and I finally got married, our first real date, and our first kiss back in the quarantine ward, the first sip of alcohol I took after rehab, the days when Luka and I dated, and so on. Then suddenly, a bright light appeared in front of me. This is it. I thought. This is the light people see right before they die. The holy light that led to the gates of heaven.
The light got brighter and brighter, until it got totally unbearable. I couldn't stand it any more and closed my eyes. When I open them again, I totally expected to see an angel in front of me, quizzing me to see if I go to hell or heaven, though all I see was a blurry shadow in front of me. It didn't take me long to figure out who it was.
I opened my dry, parched lips to call out to him, only to find a tube running down my throat, a cruel obstruction.
I blinked a few times and the fuzz began to clear. He was sleeping, his face of an innocent child's. I lifted my heavy arm to stoke his hair, to pat him affectionately. I was careful not to wake him up, though I so wanted to.
In my whole life, I had never shared much of my feelings to anyone. I kept everything to myself. You may think I am a loner, I am. I don't want anyone to pity me, to fell sad and sorry for me. After Richard, I was afraid. Afraid to fall in love and end up in a divorce.. until I met Carter. He is the pillar of my life. The first time I met him, I knew he was the one I could pour out my feelings to. But I didn't, I couldn't and wouldn't.
He stirred and woke, and saw that I was conscious. He scrambled up like and eager child. "Abby" he called out to me. I love the way he calls my name, full of love and tenderness, and yet this time, it was full of pain. I'm sorry that I woke him up, making him face the harsh reality.
"How are you feeling? Are you okay?" That's him, so serious yet so sweet. I'm not feeling good Carter, it hurts, it hurts so much. The morphine and painkillers aren't working. They can never relieve the aching in my heart. I'm dying Carter, I wouldn't live much longer.
"What? Abby, what are you trying to say? Damn these tubes. I don't know what to do, Abby, god help me." He groaned, as if he's the one that had been hit. "Would somebody get these fucking tubes out of you?" He's screaming now, and getting all emotional. I watched sadly as he slammed his fists into everything. Don't hurt yourself, don't do this to me. I plead silently. With all the strength I could muster, I reached out for him arm.
He looked into my eyes, and I gazed back. I opened his palm and with the little strength I had left, I wrote three little words in the middle of his palm.
"I love you." So little yet so much. It said all I wanted to say. It meant everything to me. I love you, Carter. I love you from the bottom of my heart. Even if I died, my love for you would never die.
"God Abby, I love you too. Stay with me. Please, please Abby, don't leave me behind. I'll never live without you." Tears, clear as crystal, were forming in his eyes.
'Sticks and stones will hurt my bones but words will never hurt me.' But Carter's words did. It pierced into my heart, slicing it into two. My heart is broken. Those four words, "Don't leave me behind." will hurt me forever. I'm abandoning him, leaving him behind in this cold, cruel world.
I could stand it no more. I pulled open his palm again and told him I'm sorry. In the past, I had done so many things that I regret now. The least I can do now is to apologize to Carter, I had to let him know that I'm sorry.
He sobbed, truly sobbed. It was the first time and probably the last time I see Carter cry. A single tear ran down my cheek. I squeezed him on the arm, trying to reassure him that I'd be okay. I could be brave for you Carter.
Something is forcing my eyelids to close. My breathing became short and rough, though oddly, I felt nothing. I know I'm dying, I can literally feel my soul slipping away from my body. Don't watch me die Carter, don't. Tears are flowing down my cheeks now, just like the energy that is draining out of my body. Slowly, my eyelids closed, and once again, there was nothing but darkness. Though this time, I felt even lonelier than before.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Oh. I tried my very best to make this sound sad. Am I cruel or what? Please guys, please, please review. I had put a lot of time in this! Seriously, I did. Well okay, not THAT much time. Practices are taking up most of my spare time. 3 hours of practice today, can you believe it?
Thank you for these ppo who were kind enough to review.
Karen Faye ( *Widen eyes in amazement* Chapter 2 was good? Wow, I wouldn't say that! Hehe. I admit that Chapter 3 is better than Chapter 2, but still, I isn't that great. Thanks for reading.
CARBYfan & c ( Are you two the same person? Well it doesn't matter. Thanks. I would like to make this clear to everyone, Abby may not be dead yet, so don't be sad and stop reading!
MeganStar ( Haha. I know people like to kill Abby, coz we're all merciless murderers! Lol. j/k But then, as I said, Abby may not be dead. Read on and you'll see. Thanks. CARBYluva313( Yeah, I liked Lucy when she was on the show, but I'm not a carcy fan. Still, I thought it would be sweet to include her in Carter's pain, if that makes any sense. Thanks and here's your chapter!
SpookyAnne ( Thanks and as a reward, I'm presenting you this brand new chapter. Believe me, it was hard to write!
Carbygirl05( Thanks so much for reading this and thanks for all the compliments. I don't know if it's really that great though. Thanks and keep reading to see if Abby died or not.
Yay. 6 reviews (or 7) that's better. Thank you. Have you ever wondered if the actual cast of ER will take the time and come and read our stories? The thought just came to me yesterday! It would be so great if they actually come and read what we write! You probably think I'm crazy or what but hey, that could happen!
Yeah right. Fat chance. Dream on.
~JeSs~