* Author: blue
* Email: blueweber@hotmail.com
* Genre: Drama/Angst/Romance
* Summary: Born in a war torn era in Japan, a young girl witness the death of her family and
clan to the hands of hatred, greed and power. Taken in by a mountain shrine, she becomes a
miko of healing. That is, until a wondering and disillusioned assassin breaks through her
peaceful world. Wounded and seeking revenge, he unwittingly finds himself depending on the
aid of the priestess to help heal him from his wounds. There an adventure begins and a
story that echoes through time with magick and mystery. (Sesshoumaru/Kagome)
* Rated: PG-13 (for violence and other contents)
The Kimono She Wore
******************
.blue.
The mountain streams flows,
Breaking through the ice.
The strength of fluid steel
Carries the scent of winter
through the lands.
.Part VI.
(The Journey Apart, Dance of the Shadows)
aoi aoi sora no iro mo kidzukanai mama
sugite yuku mainichi ga kawatte yuku
(The days pass by and change,
without us even realizing how blue the sky really is.)
-- Fukai Mori/Deep Forest
(Inuyasha)
The tent itself was plain, with very little decorations of comfort within where it
was mostly bare. There was an old, worn-down futon in one corner, a straw mat laid out on
the bottom of the tent floor and baskets of herbs and flowers for the patients strewn in
another corner. It was bare of all else except the neatly folded clothing next to the futon
and a few supply bags at the foot of the beddings.
But the atmosphere inside was overwhelming. The ki of the Chiisai Kawa within made
the tent so much more than ordinary. That power that radiated with gentle softness as the
expressive eyes of the Chiisai Kawa lifted from the bow on her lap to meet his questioning
gaze, it was that same power that made the plainness of the tent become nothing more than a
facade.
"You wanted to see me," Sesshoumaru's tone made the question far more a statement
than he had intended as he stepped fully into the tent.
She smiled, setting the bow that she had been polishing aside, carefully, next to
the arrows before bowing politely. "Yes," she rose and walked over to one of the brown bags
at the foot of her futon. He raised a brow of inquiry at this action, was she giving him a
parting gift? "I had a feeling you would not be returning with us to the Mountain Stream,"
she said as she knelt and lifted the package in her arms. He caught the sad smile on her
lips as she bowed her head and rose again to stand before him. "I thought that you would
want these back."
He blinked and saw that in her hand was his katana as well as the brown package. So
intent on studying her, he had missed seeing his weapon in her possession. He reached out
and grasped the bag, looking at her with a question in his eyes before reaching for the
newly polished black sheath that held his sword. "What is it?" He asked, indicating the
bag with a hint of curiosity in his voice.
Shyly she smiled and avoided his gaze, "Your armor and clothing," he blinked at this
surprised as she looked up and amusement sparkled in her eyes. "Did you truly think we had
burned it?"
Almost sheepish, he shrugged, feeling younger in her presence as the somber mood
lifted at her smile. "The thought had crossed my mind once or twice."
Blue eyes were laughing into his at the reply he gave, "I mended it instead of
burning it," she answered lightly. "My apprentices got curious and I let them patch up your
arm-guards." At the slight, suspicious look he shot her, she shook her head her smile still
lingering on her lips. "No, don't worry, they know what they were doing."
"Strange that priests and priestesses should know how to repair and handle weapons,"
he said dryly.
At this, the Chiisai Kawa laughed, "We aren't the best but those of the Mountain
Stream have all come from many diverse backgrounds," she answered, her voice filled with
mirth. "Some had been brought up in families of farmers, samurais, and even, vagabond
princes."
Sesshoumaru glanced at her sharply then and she raised a brow at the sudden change
of his mood. "You knew," he said.
"I knew what Inuyasha was, would it be a wonder that I figured out that his
half-brother is the same?" Sesshoumaru silently cursed his own stupidity then. The Chiisai
Kawa was obviously not a fool and even a fool would have figured that one out. Family ties,
the very words annoyed him. "Sesshoumaru," her voice was soft once more, soothing his anger
as he glanced over to her. "I won't tell anyone."
"It would bring profit to you for I am sure there are always powerful men out in the
world who wishes to hunt me down and take what is mine." He answered acidly, she had
probably just sewn him his funeral clothes.
There was hurt in her eyes at his words but she smiled at him nonetheless, as if she
understood his mistrust and his pain. "I have no need for any of the profit they have to
offer, one life is more than anything they can give me."
Sentimental idealism, Sesshoumaru frowned, "I have already taken many of what you
consider priceless lives."
There was real pain in those eyes now and Sesshoumaru was getting tired of the
guilty feeling he had whenever he realized that he was the cause of her many sorrows. "I
know," she sighed tiredly. It was in that sigh that allowed Sesshoumaru to realized that
though the Chiisai Kawa was younger than him by years, the burdens that she had carried may
not have been any less than the ones he had to bare.
Sesshoumaru gripped the bokken still tied to his sash as he set aside her gifts,
reaching to take out the bokken he had been using and handing it to her. "Here," he said
gruffly, changing the subject and directing her attention to the bone-white sword. "I have
no need for this now."
She shook her head and refused to his surprise. "It is yours, as your father had
intended."
Sesshoumaru felt his arm tremble slightly and anger burned in his eyes, "What do you
know of my father?" He snarled.
The Chiisai Kawa did not seem to be intimidated by his sudden show of anger,
"Inuyasha's late mother came to our shrine years ago seeking shelter for both the wounds on
her body and in her heart. With her, she carried a bundle of two swords, one for each
brother from what she told me before her death. Inuyasha took the first sword, the second
was waiting and it was waiting for you." So, the old woman at the shrine who had given him
the bokken instead of his katana had indeed only been acting like a fool, but her reasons
had far exceeded his own expectations.
"It is a bokken and useless to me," the Chiisai Kawa raised a brow before reaching
over and touching her hand on his for a moment, startling him enough that he nearly dropped
the weapon. But those delicate fingers of her other hand ran itself against the smooth
white bone and he heard a distinctive click at her touch and her gentle, guiding hands
pushed against his and out came a katana made of gleaming steel, sharp and ready.
"How did you know?" Sesshoumaru looked to her with both concealed awe and
suspicion.
That same kind smile graced her lips as she pushed the bokken closed. Sesshoumaru
frowned at this and frowned even more when he couldn't pull the sword out again. "The lady
who gave me this said," blue eyes met his own, "Only those who knows the truth of protection
can unsheathe this sword and use it to its full potential. What looks useless may be worth
more than gold, what looks deadly may be broken with a single blow, as life, as love, as
trust and as loyalty."
Sesshoumaru looked at the clumsy weapon in his hands, the thick shaft was actually
no more than a sheath, now he understood why the weapon had weighed as much as his katana
and he could not deny that he did not feel the power it imitated when the Chiisai Kawa had
slid the sword from its bone case. It had a ki, as if it had a life of its own. "I do not
know whether to thank you or to curse you," he said at last.
"You do not need to do either but if you want, you are entitled to both," she
answered with a real smile this time, amusement making her eyes sparkle under the
candle-light that brightened her room.
"I will be leaving before sunrise, and I do not think we will see each other again."
He finally said gruffly, changing the subject and looking away from her ever-changing eyes.
Murky grey tints began to surface in those depths of azure, looking up to meet his
amber gaze, "We should say our goodbyes now, you mean." She was not asking, that much he
knew. Her silence throughout dinner and her somber moodiness had told him earlier that she
would not pretend that he was not leaving sometime soon.
"Yes," it was the truth after all. Her earlier mood returned, dampening the joy
that had but momentarily lingered in her eyes.
"I wanted to thank you," she finally said after a long pause of awkward silence.
"For what?" He asked, not remembering having done anything of merit to have earned
her gratitude these last few days. Funny how the woman who saved his life was thanking him
and giving him gifts of parting and not the other way around. He almost felt like he was
being ungrateful or somewhat rude by only taking and never giving. But Sesshoumaru did not
like to admit himself wrong though he liked it less to be indebt to this woman. He could
not lie to himself though, he was gravely in debt to this woman.
"For carrying me to bed when I had dozed off by the fire that first night," she was
looking at him straight in the eyes, not hiding the modest blush on her cheeks or that same
unnamed emotion flashing across her eyes. Somehow, this was her way of saying goodbye, her
way of revealing her true nature in the silence of her words and the spaces between her
breaths.
Suddenly, her confession became very uncomfortable for him as if in a moment he was
about to stumble onto some unwanted revelations that he did not wish to admit to himself
yet. "Anyone would have done that, Chiisai Kawa." Especially since he owed her so much, it
was, indeed, the least he could do.
"You're doing it again," her whispered breath and that unnamed emotion came forth in
her eyes, swirling and blocking out his senses and his earlier thoughts. Those painful
words throbbed in his ears as he felt the need to get out and escape, but Sesshoumaru was no
coward and he refused to turn away from the challenge that was set before him.
"What am I doing?"
He didn't want to know as she opened her mouth and those words came, and he almost
missed their meaning as he watch her lips move almost soundlessly. But still, they
penetrated through, hitting their marks. His heart thudded painfully at the things she said
in that moment through those words. His face though showed none of his internal conflicts,
instead it was a mask of calmness. "Are you afraid of me, Sesshoumaru?" She asked in that
breathless voice and her powerful ki overwhelmed him with its unavoidable presence,
penetrating through his own shields. "Why do you always distance yourself from me by
calling me by my title?"
"I am not afraid of you," he answered harshly, mechanically.
A wistful smile, "You cannot possibly be afraid of saying my name, Sesshoumaru,"
those blue eyes filled his vision. "You have already done so several times."
"You don't know anything, Chiisai Kawa," he growled out low in his throat.
"You're doing it again," and they stared at each other, both rooted to their spots
as her hand reached out for him to touch, to reassure, like she had done so that afternoon
when he had so harshly rejected her, like she had done just moments before when she had
revealed to him the treasure that she had bestowed upon him. Her voice had almost been
teasing, as if she was comfortable in his presence enough to act so familiar, but he did not
wish to dwell on these thoughts and the sureness of her own voice broke through him once
more with that unwelcoming question. "Whenever I get too close, you push me away. Why?"
Innocent and trusting, aren't we? The voice within his head sneered as he glared at
her hand now resting gently on his arm and fought back the urge to shake it off, fought even
harder at the urge to cover her hand with his own as he turned his glare to her. "Why would
I be scared of a little girl like you?"
Blue, blue eyes...
She didn't answer for a while, just looked at him for a long, long time. "Maybe
we'll never find out," she smiled and her words did more damage to him with that smile.
"Oyasumi, Sesshoumaru," she said as she extracted her hand from his stiff arm. "Sayonara
and have a safe journey." She bowed and turned away.
She was dismissing him after having left that mystery in his heart, as her eyes
continued to whisper those same nameless emotion to him from the depth of her heart, a look
that he caught before she had turned away from him. In that moment, Sesshoumaru was very
angry at her for pushing him away so easily, "Goodbye, Kagome." He said with forceful
finality, spiting out her name as if it were a curse.
He turned sharply, sliding the bokken into his sash once more before bending and
picking up his old attire and weapon. Straightening, he left the room with his hand
clutched around his katana's sheath as the brown bag bumped against his thigh when he exited
her tent. Sesshoumaru never turned back to see the sad murky eyes watching his retreating
back before the tent flap closed while he exited into the night. At the edge of the camp,
two apprentices stood waiting, one held out a bag of medicine and another gave him a horse
already carrying food supplies.
Sesshoumaru stormed out of there, furious, realizing exactly how well Kagome had
judged his character. The little girl had practiced that ending, he was sure. Only he
never knew that Kagome had hoped to walk him to his horse, nor that she had wished that
somehow she could have followed him to wherever in hell in was sure to go. But fate made
sure their parting was abrupt and swift, as if it were one that had not yet ended and would
one day demand to be revisited so a real goodbye could be said.
In the shadows of the pine the next day, Sesshoumaru puzzled over the strange words
they had shared the night before, still unwilling to give name to that strange emotion in
her eyes. But the sapphire orbs haunted his memories while he fought to suppress them
grimly, unwilling to find the source of his own anger and confusion that had overwhelmed him
the night before. And when he paused for a drink by a bubbling stream, he caught sight of
his reflection before it was distorted. There, within the rippling waters, he found himself
facing that same emotion reflecting back at him at the thought of her.
Stubbornly, he traveled on. He had a mission after all, and in no way would he let
a little girl get in the way of his mission, especially not just by the simple glance that
she had bestowed upon him with those wide, blue-grey eyes. Even if they were forever burned
into his mind's eyes in the darkness behind his closed lids.
* * *
Kagome groaned as she woke in a tent that was not her own. Momentarily disoriented,
she tried flexing her fingers and checking to see if all of her limbs were still attached to
her body before trying to rise. "Itai," she murmured as she gingerly touched the sore spot
at the base of her skull, wincing slightly at the contact.
"Oh, good, you're awake!" A pleasant voice cut in as she blinked and looked up.
She blinked to see the firelight dance gold against the side of the tent. Strange,
when we travel, we never sleep in tents. "Where--?"
"You're safe," her eyes traveled from the hands that held her down to the warm brown
of another's eyes just as he pulled away.
"Kouga-san?" She uttered in bewilderment. "What--?"
He smiled grimly from his place just a few steps away from where she lay. "What am
I doing here? Or what are you doing here?"
"Both," she said bewilderedly. Desperately Kagome tried to remember what had caused
her presence to be in a tent with a man she barely knew.
"You don't remember?" He asked though not really surprised to see her shaking her
head slowly as she looked deep in thought. "You were ambushed on your way back into the
mountains. There were bandits who traveled through, around here, and they heard of a
gathering of people near the village we were at. They thought that the people would pay you
with both food and money. We heard the commotion they were making and came," Kouga shrugged
at this, perhaps expressing everything else that he did not say and hiding whatever it was
that he chose not to mention.
The Chiisai Kawa before him turned her head slowly away in thought. "I remember the
men," she whispered after a period of silence. Sadness seeping into her voice as she raised
her gaze to the flap of the tent, watching the shadows of Kouga's ronin tether before the
fire outside. "I remembered their hunger, their greed, their desperation, and their pain.
They came, like starved wolves preying on the weak and with their swords, cut down those
that I had watched grow and love since youth. Some fled, others were not so lucky. But I
was not strong enough to help either side."
Kouga was grim at this as he watched the woman before her, silently listening to her
words. "I had thought that the peace I could provide for the few would be enough," great
eyes turned to him then, "but that is just the naive belief of a child and a coward."
"You subdued them well enough by the time my men had arrived," Kouga sighed at that
look. "You are no coward, your arrows struck many and struck true."
Tears fell from eyes sad and endlessly deep, "I aimed for evil and it found the
hearts of living men, not monsters or disease." Kouga's eyes met hers before looking away,
unable to stare into eyes that seemed to bare his soul. Eyes that belonged to someone still
untouched by the ravages of war, starvation and fear. She had spoke true, the world was
falling apart piece-by-piece into a madness that was becoming more and more like a hell on
earth.
"Sometimes it happens during a time like this, Kagome-sama." He could not lie to
eyes that seem to see all truth.
"I am the Chiisai Kawa of the Mountain Stream, healer of healers." Her voice was
like the power of a wave, caressing the sands, its strength felt but not seen. "It is time
the healers come out of the shadows, trying to do nothing more than lessen the symptoms of a
disease of the heart. It is time I venture out into the world to help the warriors and
simple people fight the battles that cannot be over simply by having me watch and wait for a
favorable end."
Kouga looked to her sharply, "Kagome-same, it is best that you return to the
Mountain Stream and stay there with those that did escape."
"I am a miko trained and the Chiisai Kawa, my duties lie with the people. And the
people have come to me in a cry for help that I can no longer ignore, for the darkness that
fester in their hearts is something that they can no longer fight alone." She retorted with
angry determination, eyes burning with stubborn refusal to his commands. "My arrows found
true because the men in the woods were consumed by the demons within and I will fulfill my
duties to the people as I was trained to do."
Kouga growled low in his throat, "Woman, do you know what you speak of here? War!
One girl-child who has never seen this darkness cannot change where many men had died and
could not change. Go to sleep girl, you still have not yet recovered enough to make so
drastic a decision as this and your loss of blood has obviously made you delusional."
"I may not know of what you speak of," she told him in the small tent they now
shared. "But I know that a single touch may heal a dying man if one knows where to touch,
and a small herb may cure an illness that destroys in unimaginable ways. The cure always
starts small, for how can men change this darkness if he has not the hope to believe that it
is possible and that it is true?"
"Hope," Kouga looked to her from the shadows, his eyes deep and dark. "I had not
heard such a word spoken for a long time. Perhaps only foolish dreamers can think and speak
so innocently nowadays, when in such dark nights."
She smiled at him gently, kindly, and Kouga returned it with his weary one, having
forgotten such smiles existed as well, surprised that she was not insulted by his disbelief
in her abilities and in her hope. "What have you been fighting for if not for hope?" She
asked him with her eyes of black-sapphire.
"Survival," he answered simply. And a great weight seemed to suddenly descend upon
him. His earlier jovialness that she had first witnessed when she had met him, melted away
like snow to reveal barren grounds. With it, she saw a hard and embittered man, who, having
seen too much and lost too much, numbed his heart to the world.
He was so much like Sesshoumaru in this aspect, she thought with a great sadness
that weighed her down as well. Kagome bowed her head to him then, "Then let this foolish
dreamer thank you for letting her dream one more day and survive with you." Setting her
hand over his, he met her gave, speechless. "Your men look up to you and your smiles and
your jokes," she told him, remembering her patients that had spoken so fondly of their boss.
Kouga was too shocked to pull away from her gaze, too breathless to stop her from stripping
away the mask that he always wore. "They believe because you do, they survive because you
survived..." her blue gaze was dark and filled with something that was innocent but not
ignorant. It was the color of the sky just before waking to the dawn, and in those eyes he
found what he had thought he had lost forever when he had lost everything dear to him. "And
they will come to believe again, live again, when you do."
Those words fell from her lips as easily as rain, as easily as those men corrupted
by anger and hatred and greed had fallen at her arrows and his sword, as easily as her
earlier tears of grief and remembrance. And it was these words that had cleansed him just
as easily and just as simple as the warmth she so freely bestowed when she reached out
across that small space to cover his calloused hands, hands that had been washed in blood
too many times for wrongs that could not be divided by simple beliefs of good or evil only
life and survival. But she had touched him, her hands not so stained for she only fought to
protect and to help those in need, never for power as he had fought to gain, never for greed
or hatred or anger or vengeance that he had come to believe was the only way.
"Thank you," he smiled at her in a smile he had not shown in a long time as well.
"For still believing in those dreams."
That night he watched her sleep and when he had followed her, crouched close to
where she lay dreaming, he was no longer haunted by his demons of the night or the accusing
eyes of the people he had slain. This time he dreamt of peace and the fields of a home he
had not seen since his youth, and in the morning he rose to greet his men with that same
jovial smile. Only this time, his eyes reflected the newly discovered inner peace that
visited Kouga in the darkness of his dreams, changing his stance to that old relaxed and
confident way he had stood long ago on a battlefield when he was still a naive and arrogant
youth, only this time the confidence was no longer marred by blind ignorance.
And hope... hope once again visited the ronins in the woods, who rested at the foot
of the great mountain, for the first time, in a long time.
* * *
In the dark days of war, the warlords fought for control of Japan, forcing the
emperor and those close to him to flee and hide. The country churned in the chaos of the
civil unrest, burning under the sun and the moon. Many perished, towns were destroyed,
innocence lost forever. In those days monks and mikos walked the earth, searching for
survivors, warning others with dire news, and bringing orphans to shrines and secret
monasteries hidden deep in mountains and forests, untouched by unholy hands of men seeking
nothing but powers to claim themselves gods.
It just so happened that a little girl of great powers was brought to the very steps
of an equally mysterious mountain for she was the only survivor of her village of an obscure
clan. There a shrine rested in slumber waiting for the day that destiny calls for its
awakening.
As the wars continued, a seeming victor other than the Emperor began to emerge.
They called him the Ruthless-Prince, one who earned his reputation for his extreme
strategies. Tatsu Naraku was indeed cold. He was a beautiful and shrewd ruler, who gained
his loyalties through fear and greed. Others found his title especially fitting after he
had dealt a most horrendous deathblow to his fiancée, whom he discovered to be consorting
with his worst enemies.
Still time went, and destiny's plans began to converge more swiftly upon a point of
inevitable collision.
********************************************************************************************
Itai - "Ouch" or "That hurts!"
* I bet you thought this chapter would never come out... but it did! Ooohohohohohohohohoho!
*pops up her neko ears* ^_^;; Yeah, it's not TOO long but I'm working on the second part
of this chapter. Yeah, I'm splitting chapters all the time, ne? Nooooo it won't happen
again... I hope ^_^;; I'm not so sure. I finally got this story figured out and I'm back
in the GROOVE! But I'm also back in school... so I'm working on it ^_^;; Just be assured
that it's NOT dead ^_^;; Thank you for all you reviewers out there for supporting me and
nagging me and asking me when it was going to come out and kicking me when it didn't ^_^;;
I really appreciate it! ^_^v
* I bet a lot of you are going "NO! Where are you taking Sessh-chan?!" Well, he's still
a main character, he'll show up eventually ^_~ You'll see!
I'll thank everyone in the next chapter, since I've been so harried to get this one out
^_^;;
If you actually believe that I own Inuyasha.... -_-;; *patpatpat*
. blue .
. blueweber@hotmail.com .
. http://www.megspace.com/arts/colorblue/aoi.html/ .
* Email: blueweber@hotmail.com
* Genre: Drama/Angst/Romance
* Summary: Born in a war torn era in Japan, a young girl witness the death of her family and
clan to the hands of hatred, greed and power. Taken in by a mountain shrine, she becomes a
miko of healing. That is, until a wondering and disillusioned assassin breaks through her
peaceful world. Wounded and seeking revenge, he unwittingly finds himself depending on the
aid of the priestess to help heal him from his wounds. There an adventure begins and a
story that echoes through time with magick and mystery. (Sesshoumaru/Kagome)
* Rated: PG-13 (for violence and other contents)
The Kimono She Wore
******************
.blue.
The mountain streams flows,
Breaking through the ice.
The strength of fluid steel
Carries the scent of winter
through the lands.
.Part VI.
(The Journey Apart, Dance of the Shadows)
aoi aoi sora no iro mo kidzukanai mama
sugite yuku mainichi ga kawatte yuku
(The days pass by and change,
without us even realizing how blue the sky really is.)
-- Fukai Mori/Deep Forest
(Inuyasha)
The tent itself was plain, with very little decorations of comfort within where it
was mostly bare. There was an old, worn-down futon in one corner, a straw mat laid out on
the bottom of the tent floor and baskets of herbs and flowers for the patients strewn in
another corner. It was bare of all else except the neatly folded clothing next to the futon
and a few supply bags at the foot of the beddings.
But the atmosphere inside was overwhelming. The ki of the Chiisai Kawa within made
the tent so much more than ordinary. That power that radiated with gentle softness as the
expressive eyes of the Chiisai Kawa lifted from the bow on her lap to meet his questioning
gaze, it was that same power that made the plainness of the tent become nothing more than a
facade.
"You wanted to see me," Sesshoumaru's tone made the question far more a statement
than he had intended as he stepped fully into the tent.
She smiled, setting the bow that she had been polishing aside, carefully, next to
the arrows before bowing politely. "Yes," she rose and walked over to one of the brown bags
at the foot of her futon. He raised a brow of inquiry at this action, was she giving him a
parting gift? "I had a feeling you would not be returning with us to the Mountain Stream,"
she said as she knelt and lifted the package in her arms. He caught the sad smile on her
lips as she bowed her head and rose again to stand before him. "I thought that you would
want these back."
He blinked and saw that in her hand was his katana as well as the brown package. So
intent on studying her, he had missed seeing his weapon in her possession. He reached out
and grasped the bag, looking at her with a question in his eyes before reaching for the
newly polished black sheath that held his sword. "What is it?" He asked, indicating the
bag with a hint of curiosity in his voice.
Shyly she smiled and avoided his gaze, "Your armor and clothing," he blinked at this
surprised as she looked up and amusement sparkled in her eyes. "Did you truly think we had
burned it?"
Almost sheepish, he shrugged, feeling younger in her presence as the somber mood
lifted at her smile. "The thought had crossed my mind once or twice."
Blue eyes were laughing into his at the reply he gave, "I mended it instead of
burning it," she answered lightly. "My apprentices got curious and I let them patch up your
arm-guards." At the slight, suspicious look he shot her, she shook her head her smile still
lingering on her lips. "No, don't worry, they know what they were doing."
"Strange that priests and priestesses should know how to repair and handle weapons,"
he said dryly.
At this, the Chiisai Kawa laughed, "We aren't the best but those of the Mountain
Stream have all come from many diverse backgrounds," she answered, her voice filled with
mirth. "Some had been brought up in families of farmers, samurais, and even, vagabond
princes."
Sesshoumaru glanced at her sharply then and she raised a brow at the sudden change
of his mood. "You knew," he said.
"I knew what Inuyasha was, would it be a wonder that I figured out that his
half-brother is the same?" Sesshoumaru silently cursed his own stupidity then. The Chiisai
Kawa was obviously not a fool and even a fool would have figured that one out. Family ties,
the very words annoyed him. "Sesshoumaru," her voice was soft once more, soothing his anger
as he glanced over to her. "I won't tell anyone."
"It would bring profit to you for I am sure there are always powerful men out in the
world who wishes to hunt me down and take what is mine." He answered acidly, she had
probably just sewn him his funeral clothes.
There was hurt in her eyes at his words but she smiled at him nonetheless, as if she
understood his mistrust and his pain. "I have no need for any of the profit they have to
offer, one life is more than anything they can give me."
Sentimental idealism, Sesshoumaru frowned, "I have already taken many of what you
consider priceless lives."
There was real pain in those eyes now and Sesshoumaru was getting tired of the
guilty feeling he had whenever he realized that he was the cause of her many sorrows. "I
know," she sighed tiredly. It was in that sigh that allowed Sesshoumaru to realized that
though the Chiisai Kawa was younger than him by years, the burdens that she had carried may
not have been any less than the ones he had to bare.
Sesshoumaru gripped the bokken still tied to his sash as he set aside her gifts,
reaching to take out the bokken he had been using and handing it to her. "Here," he said
gruffly, changing the subject and directing her attention to the bone-white sword. "I have
no need for this now."
She shook her head and refused to his surprise. "It is yours, as your father had
intended."
Sesshoumaru felt his arm tremble slightly and anger burned in his eyes, "What do you
know of my father?" He snarled.
The Chiisai Kawa did not seem to be intimidated by his sudden show of anger,
"Inuyasha's late mother came to our shrine years ago seeking shelter for both the wounds on
her body and in her heart. With her, she carried a bundle of two swords, one for each
brother from what she told me before her death. Inuyasha took the first sword, the second
was waiting and it was waiting for you." So, the old woman at the shrine who had given him
the bokken instead of his katana had indeed only been acting like a fool, but her reasons
had far exceeded his own expectations.
"It is a bokken and useless to me," the Chiisai Kawa raised a brow before reaching
over and touching her hand on his for a moment, startling him enough that he nearly dropped
the weapon. But those delicate fingers of her other hand ran itself against the smooth
white bone and he heard a distinctive click at her touch and her gentle, guiding hands
pushed against his and out came a katana made of gleaming steel, sharp and ready.
"How did you know?" Sesshoumaru looked to her with both concealed awe and
suspicion.
That same kind smile graced her lips as she pushed the bokken closed. Sesshoumaru
frowned at this and frowned even more when he couldn't pull the sword out again. "The lady
who gave me this said," blue eyes met his own, "Only those who knows the truth of protection
can unsheathe this sword and use it to its full potential. What looks useless may be worth
more than gold, what looks deadly may be broken with a single blow, as life, as love, as
trust and as loyalty."
Sesshoumaru looked at the clumsy weapon in his hands, the thick shaft was actually
no more than a sheath, now he understood why the weapon had weighed as much as his katana
and he could not deny that he did not feel the power it imitated when the Chiisai Kawa had
slid the sword from its bone case. It had a ki, as if it had a life of its own. "I do not
know whether to thank you or to curse you," he said at last.
"You do not need to do either but if you want, you are entitled to both," she
answered with a real smile this time, amusement making her eyes sparkle under the
candle-light that brightened her room.
"I will be leaving before sunrise, and I do not think we will see each other again."
He finally said gruffly, changing the subject and looking away from her ever-changing eyes.
Murky grey tints began to surface in those depths of azure, looking up to meet his
amber gaze, "We should say our goodbyes now, you mean." She was not asking, that much he
knew. Her silence throughout dinner and her somber moodiness had told him earlier that she
would not pretend that he was not leaving sometime soon.
"Yes," it was the truth after all. Her earlier mood returned, dampening the joy
that had but momentarily lingered in her eyes.
"I wanted to thank you," she finally said after a long pause of awkward silence.
"For what?" He asked, not remembering having done anything of merit to have earned
her gratitude these last few days. Funny how the woman who saved his life was thanking him
and giving him gifts of parting and not the other way around. He almost felt like he was
being ungrateful or somewhat rude by only taking and never giving. But Sesshoumaru did not
like to admit himself wrong though he liked it less to be indebt to this woman. He could
not lie to himself though, he was gravely in debt to this woman.
"For carrying me to bed when I had dozed off by the fire that first night," she was
looking at him straight in the eyes, not hiding the modest blush on her cheeks or that same
unnamed emotion flashing across her eyes. Somehow, this was her way of saying goodbye, her
way of revealing her true nature in the silence of her words and the spaces between her
breaths.
Suddenly, her confession became very uncomfortable for him as if in a moment he was
about to stumble onto some unwanted revelations that he did not wish to admit to himself
yet. "Anyone would have done that, Chiisai Kawa." Especially since he owed her so much, it
was, indeed, the least he could do.
"You're doing it again," her whispered breath and that unnamed emotion came forth in
her eyes, swirling and blocking out his senses and his earlier thoughts. Those painful
words throbbed in his ears as he felt the need to get out and escape, but Sesshoumaru was no
coward and he refused to turn away from the challenge that was set before him.
"What am I doing?"
He didn't want to know as she opened her mouth and those words came, and he almost
missed their meaning as he watch her lips move almost soundlessly. But still, they
penetrated through, hitting their marks. His heart thudded painfully at the things she said
in that moment through those words. His face though showed none of his internal conflicts,
instead it was a mask of calmness. "Are you afraid of me, Sesshoumaru?" She asked in that
breathless voice and her powerful ki overwhelmed him with its unavoidable presence,
penetrating through his own shields. "Why do you always distance yourself from me by
calling me by my title?"
"I am not afraid of you," he answered harshly, mechanically.
A wistful smile, "You cannot possibly be afraid of saying my name, Sesshoumaru,"
those blue eyes filled his vision. "You have already done so several times."
"You don't know anything, Chiisai Kawa," he growled out low in his throat.
"You're doing it again," and they stared at each other, both rooted to their spots
as her hand reached out for him to touch, to reassure, like she had done so that afternoon
when he had so harshly rejected her, like she had done just moments before when she had
revealed to him the treasure that she had bestowed upon him. Her voice had almost been
teasing, as if she was comfortable in his presence enough to act so familiar, but he did not
wish to dwell on these thoughts and the sureness of her own voice broke through him once
more with that unwelcoming question. "Whenever I get too close, you push me away. Why?"
Innocent and trusting, aren't we? The voice within his head sneered as he glared at
her hand now resting gently on his arm and fought back the urge to shake it off, fought even
harder at the urge to cover her hand with his own as he turned his glare to her. "Why would
I be scared of a little girl like you?"
Blue, blue eyes...
She didn't answer for a while, just looked at him for a long, long time. "Maybe
we'll never find out," she smiled and her words did more damage to him with that smile.
"Oyasumi, Sesshoumaru," she said as she extracted her hand from his stiff arm. "Sayonara
and have a safe journey." She bowed and turned away.
She was dismissing him after having left that mystery in his heart, as her eyes
continued to whisper those same nameless emotion to him from the depth of her heart, a look
that he caught before she had turned away from him. In that moment, Sesshoumaru was very
angry at her for pushing him away so easily, "Goodbye, Kagome." He said with forceful
finality, spiting out her name as if it were a curse.
He turned sharply, sliding the bokken into his sash once more before bending and
picking up his old attire and weapon. Straightening, he left the room with his hand
clutched around his katana's sheath as the brown bag bumped against his thigh when he exited
her tent. Sesshoumaru never turned back to see the sad murky eyes watching his retreating
back before the tent flap closed while he exited into the night. At the edge of the camp,
two apprentices stood waiting, one held out a bag of medicine and another gave him a horse
already carrying food supplies.
Sesshoumaru stormed out of there, furious, realizing exactly how well Kagome had
judged his character. The little girl had practiced that ending, he was sure. Only he
never knew that Kagome had hoped to walk him to his horse, nor that she had wished that
somehow she could have followed him to wherever in hell in was sure to go. But fate made
sure their parting was abrupt and swift, as if it were one that had not yet ended and would
one day demand to be revisited so a real goodbye could be said.
In the shadows of the pine the next day, Sesshoumaru puzzled over the strange words
they had shared the night before, still unwilling to give name to that strange emotion in
her eyes. But the sapphire orbs haunted his memories while he fought to suppress them
grimly, unwilling to find the source of his own anger and confusion that had overwhelmed him
the night before. And when he paused for a drink by a bubbling stream, he caught sight of
his reflection before it was distorted. There, within the rippling waters, he found himself
facing that same emotion reflecting back at him at the thought of her.
Stubbornly, he traveled on. He had a mission after all, and in no way would he let
a little girl get in the way of his mission, especially not just by the simple glance that
she had bestowed upon him with those wide, blue-grey eyes. Even if they were forever burned
into his mind's eyes in the darkness behind his closed lids.
* * *
Kagome groaned as she woke in a tent that was not her own. Momentarily disoriented,
she tried flexing her fingers and checking to see if all of her limbs were still attached to
her body before trying to rise. "Itai," she murmured as she gingerly touched the sore spot
at the base of her skull, wincing slightly at the contact.
"Oh, good, you're awake!" A pleasant voice cut in as she blinked and looked up.
She blinked to see the firelight dance gold against the side of the tent. Strange,
when we travel, we never sleep in tents. "Where--?"
"You're safe," her eyes traveled from the hands that held her down to the warm brown
of another's eyes just as he pulled away.
"Kouga-san?" She uttered in bewilderment. "What--?"
He smiled grimly from his place just a few steps away from where she lay. "What am
I doing here? Or what are you doing here?"
"Both," she said bewilderedly. Desperately Kagome tried to remember what had caused
her presence to be in a tent with a man she barely knew.
"You don't remember?" He asked though not really surprised to see her shaking her
head slowly as she looked deep in thought. "You were ambushed on your way back into the
mountains. There were bandits who traveled through, around here, and they heard of a
gathering of people near the village we were at. They thought that the people would pay you
with both food and money. We heard the commotion they were making and came," Kouga shrugged
at this, perhaps expressing everything else that he did not say and hiding whatever it was
that he chose not to mention.
The Chiisai Kawa before him turned her head slowly away in thought. "I remember the
men," she whispered after a period of silence. Sadness seeping into her voice as she raised
her gaze to the flap of the tent, watching the shadows of Kouga's ronin tether before the
fire outside. "I remembered their hunger, their greed, their desperation, and their pain.
They came, like starved wolves preying on the weak and with their swords, cut down those
that I had watched grow and love since youth. Some fled, others were not so lucky. But I
was not strong enough to help either side."
Kouga was grim at this as he watched the woman before her, silently listening to her
words. "I had thought that the peace I could provide for the few would be enough," great
eyes turned to him then, "but that is just the naive belief of a child and a coward."
"You subdued them well enough by the time my men had arrived," Kouga sighed at that
look. "You are no coward, your arrows struck many and struck true."
Tears fell from eyes sad and endlessly deep, "I aimed for evil and it found the
hearts of living men, not monsters or disease." Kouga's eyes met hers before looking away,
unable to stare into eyes that seemed to bare his soul. Eyes that belonged to someone still
untouched by the ravages of war, starvation and fear. She had spoke true, the world was
falling apart piece-by-piece into a madness that was becoming more and more like a hell on
earth.
"Sometimes it happens during a time like this, Kagome-sama." He could not lie to
eyes that seem to see all truth.
"I am the Chiisai Kawa of the Mountain Stream, healer of healers." Her voice was
like the power of a wave, caressing the sands, its strength felt but not seen. "It is time
the healers come out of the shadows, trying to do nothing more than lessen the symptoms of a
disease of the heart. It is time I venture out into the world to help the warriors and
simple people fight the battles that cannot be over simply by having me watch and wait for a
favorable end."
Kouga looked to her sharply, "Kagome-same, it is best that you return to the
Mountain Stream and stay there with those that did escape."
"I am a miko trained and the Chiisai Kawa, my duties lie with the people. And the
people have come to me in a cry for help that I can no longer ignore, for the darkness that
fester in their hearts is something that they can no longer fight alone." She retorted with
angry determination, eyes burning with stubborn refusal to his commands. "My arrows found
true because the men in the woods were consumed by the demons within and I will fulfill my
duties to the people as I was trained to do."
Kouga growled low in his throat, "Woman, do you know what you speak of here? War!
One girl-child who has never seen this darkness cannot change where many men had died and
could not change. Go to sleep girl, you still have not yet recovered enough to make so
drastic a decision as this and your loss of blood has obviously made you delusional."
"I may not know of what you speak of," she told him in the small tent they now
shared. "But I know that a single touch may heal a dying man if one knows where to touch,
and a small herb may cure an illness that destroys in unimaginable ways. The cure always
starts small, for how can men change this darkness if he has not the hope to believe that it
is possible and that it is true?"
"Hope," Kouga looked to her from the shadows, his eyes deep and dark. "I had not
heard such a word spoken for a long time. Perhaps only foolish dreamers can think and speak
so innocently nowadays, when in such dark nights."
She smiled at him gently, kindly, and Kouga returned it with his weary one, having
forgotten such smiles existed as well, surprised that she was not insulted by his disbelief
in her abilities and in her hope. "What have you been fighting for if not for hope?" She
asked him with her eyes of black-sapphire.
"Survival," he answered simply. And a great weight seemed to suddenly descend upon
him. His earlier jovialness that she had first witnessed when she had met him, melted away
like snow to reveal barren grounds. With it, she saw a hard and embittered man, who, having
seen too much and lost too much, numbed his heart to the world.
He was so much like Sesshoumaru in this aspect, she thought with a great sadness
that weighed her down as well. Kagome bowed her head to him then, "Then let this foolish
dreamer thank you for letting her dream one more day and survive with you." Setting her
hand over his, he met her gave, speechless. "Your men look up to you and your smiles and
your jokes," she told him, remembering her patients that had spoken so fondly of their boss.
Kouga was too shocked to pull away from her gaze, too breathless to stop her from stripping
away the mask that he always wore. "They believe because you do, they survive because you
survived..." her blue gaze was dark and filled with something that was innocent but not
ignorant. It was the color of the sky just before waking to the dawn, and in those eyes he
found what he had thought he had lost forever when he had lost everything dear to him. "And
they will come to believe again, live again, when you do."
Those words fell from her lips as easily as rain, as easily as those men corrupted
by anger and hatred and greed had fallen at her arrows and his sword, as easily as her
earlier tears of grief and remembrance. And it was these words that had cleansed him just
as easily and just as simple as the warmth she so freely bestowed when she reached out
across that small space to cover his calloused hands, hands that had been washed in blood
too many times for wrongs that could not be divided by simple beliefs of good or evil only
life and survival. But she had touched him, her hands not so stained for she only fought to
protect and to help those in need, never for power as he had fought to gain, never for greed
or hatred or anger or vengeance that he had come to believe was the only way.
"Thank you," he smiled at her in a smile he had not shown in a long time as well.
"For still believing in those dreams."
That night he watched her sleep and when he had followed her, crouched close to
where she lay dreaming, he was no longer haunted by his demons of the night or the accusing
eyes of the people he had slain. This time he dreamt of peace and the fields of a home he
had not seen since his youth, and in the morning he rose to greet his men with that same
jovial smile. Only this time, his eyes reflected the newly discovered inner peace that
visited Kouga in the darkness of his dreams, changing his stance to that old relaxed and
confident way he had stood long ago on a battlefield when he was still a naive and arrogant
youth, only this time the confidence was no longer marred by blind ignorance.
And hope... hope once again visited the ronins in the woods, who rested at the foot
of the great mountain, for the first time, in a long time.
* * *
In the dark days of war, the warlords fought for control of Japan, forcing the
emperor and those close to him to flee and hide. The country churned in the chaos of the
civil unrest, burning under the sun and the moon. Many perished, towns were destroyed,
innocence lost forever. In those days monks and mikos walked the earth, searching for
survivors, warning others with dire news, and bringing orphans to shrines and secret
monasteries hidden deep in mountains and forests, untouched by unholy hands of men seeking
nothing but powers to claim themselves gods.
It just so happened that a little girl of great powers was brought to the very steps
of an equally mysterious mountain for she was the only survivor of her village of an obscure
clan. There a shrine rested in slumber waiting for the day that destiny calls for its
awakening.
As the wars continued, a seeming victor other than the Emperor began to emerge.
They called him the Ruthless-Prince, one who earned his reputation for his extreme
strategies. Tatsu Naraku was indeed cold. He was a beautiful and shrewd ruler, who gained
his loyalties through fear and greed. Others found his title especially fitting after he
had dealt a most horrendous deathblow to his fiancée, whom he discovered to be consorting
with his worst enemies.
Still time went, and destiny's plans began to converge more swiftly upon a point of
inevitable collision.
********************************************************************************************
Itai - "Ouch" or "That hurts!"
* I bet you thought this chapter would never come out... but it did! Ooohohohohohohohohoho!
*pops up her neko ears* ^_^;; Yeah, it's not TOO long but I'm working on the second part
of this chapter. Yeah, I'm splitting chapters all the time, ne? Nooooo it won't happen
again... I hope ^_^;; I'm not so sure. I finally got this story figured out and I'm back
in the GROOVE! But I'm also back in school... so I'm working on it ^_^;; Just be assured
that it's NOT dead ^_^;; Thank you for all you reviewers out there for supporting me and
nagging me and asking me when it was going to come out and kicking me when it didn't ^_^;;
I really appreciate it! ^_^v
* I bet a lot of you are going "NO! Where are you taking Sessh-chan?!" Well, he's still
a main character, he'll show up eventually ^_~ You'll see!
I'll thank everyone in the next chapter, since I've been so harried to get this one out
^_^;;
If you actually believe that I own Inuyasha.... -_-;; *patpatpat*
. blue .
. blueweber@hotmail.com .
. http://www.megspace.com/arts/colorblue/aoi.html/ .