Complete the Circle
Chapter Thirty-Six: Delusions
He watched in silence as the spell disappeared. He had figured as much, and now he had the evidence to the location of the Shikon no Tama. A few moments later, Aki appeared.
"Why didn't you warn me about the backlash?" she demanded. "If I hadn't been careful, then I might have been caught in Tetsusaiga's shockwave!"
"I take it you managed to destroy the blade?" he asked, a plan forming in his mind.
"Yeah, yeah. The all mighty demon blade won't be bothering you no more," she said, sitting lazily in a nearby chair. "So, you going to kill Hayashi?"
"Don't be foolish. You know how much the other youkai would object if I took power that way," he said. "Besides, all my careful planning will go to waste if I kill him so bluntly."
"At least the other guy did some useful things before he died," she said, putting away the chess pieces. "Now we know for sure where all the Shikon shards are."
He looked out of the window, the afternoon sun glinting off his cold cruel eyes. He smiled slightly as he started to put his plan into action.
Toutousai stared at the remains of Tetsusaiga, trying not to look too dismayed that his masterpiece had been broken so easily. He fingered the hilt of Tetsusaiga lightly, and almost imagined that he could see the rest of the blade in its entire rusty splendor.
"Err… Can you fix it?" Musashino asked hopefully. He tried not to take his anger out on the boy. After all, it was his first time using it against a full youkai.
"A sword in this state can never be fixed, even by the best sword smith," Toutousai said, still staring at the sword's shattered remains.
"So what are we supposed to do?" asked Kagome, an air of despair about her.
"The only thing that I can do is make a new sword," he answered, "but the new blade will never have the power of Tetsusaiga. I can make it to look the same, but the power behind it will be significantly different."
"How different?" asked Miroku, not protesting when Sango moved to sit right next to him.
"Different," answered Toutousai. "Think: no power at all."
"No power? How are we supposed to fight with no power?" demanded Kagome.
"You can't," Toutousai said sharply. "And by the looks of things, more youkai will come to attack you for the Shikon shards that you hold. I suggest you to run away and hide."
"Run away and hide? What kind of advice is that?" asked Souta, not liking the old man one bit.
"Either run or die. Take your pick," Toutousai said bluntly.
"How about fight?" asked Souta. "Why can't we do that?"
"You're not going to fight anyone, Souta," Kagome said firmly.
"Nee-chan!" Souta protested. "Everyone got to fight except me. Even Kohaku and Shippou fought against that youkai!"
"You're not going to fight!" Kagome shouted. "You don't have any power at all. You'll only get yourself hurt!"
"Listen to your Nee-chan, Souta," Inuyasha said. "She's pretty smart when she puts her mind to it."
"Inuyasha!" Kagome protested against his teasing.
"If Inu-nii-chan says so, then fine," Souta said, pouting slightly. Kagome fumed at Souta.
"Why won't you listen to me?" asked Kagome.
"Because you're not 'cool,'" Inuyasha answered cheekily.
"Do you want me to give you bodily harm?" Kagome threatened. He wisely decided to be quiet.
"Ahem," Toutousai interrupted them, "As I was saying, the original Tetsusaiga cannot be fixed. However, a new sword can be made."
"Yeah. One with no power," Miroku said.
"Wrong. One with power equal or surpassing Tetsusaiga's own power," Toutousai said mysteriously. After he was sure that he had all of their attention, he continued. "The power of Tetsusaiga did not come from me. I merely built a vessel to contain the power. The true power of Tetsusaiga came from Inutaisho, and I just sealed the power within the sword. The wave of power that you felt escape Tetsusaiga when it was broken was his power. The reason I cannot repair the sword is because the force behind it is missing. I would just be repairing a shell."
"So let's get some mighty youkai to seal their power within the sword," Inuyasha suggested simply.
"Don't be a fool. The only way that you'll be able to use a sword with the same nature as Tetsusaiga is if the new sword is made with your own power. Otherwise, you'll be unable to harness the blade's power," Toutousai said.
"But Tetsusaiga wasn't made with Inuyasha's power, yet he was still able to use it," Kagome said reasonably.
"You forget that Tetsusaiga's nature is to protect the people the holder cares for," Toutousai said, "Inuyasha was able to use it because he had that emotion in him. However, if a new sword is made, then what triggers the new sword's power will be different from what triggered Tetsusaiga's power. If Musashino does not have that exact same feeling that the owner of the power had, then he will be unable to use the sword. It would take too long to discover what triggers the sword, and time is something that you don't have."
"Then what are we supposed to do?" asked Sango. "How are we supposed to fight Naraku?"
"I still opt for you to run away from all of this and leave youkai politics to youkai," Toutousai said. "If Naraku causes things to get out of hand, then other youkai will take care of it. You needn't worry about anything."
" 'Needn't worry about anything?' I have plenty to worry about!" Sango shouted suddenly. "My brother was almost killed again because of Naraku! Do you think that I'm going to forgive him that easily? I won't stop until he's dead! Do you understand?"
Everyone looked at Sango's sudden outburst in shock. They had never imagined her to be so violent, but then again, things were taking a turn for the worst, and Sango was getting stressed, no doubt just like the rest of them.
"It's strange how Naraku never seems to die," Shippou pondered out loud. The same thoughts were running through everyone else's minds.
"Ane-ue, is it okay if we go home now?" Kohaku asked.
"Sure," Sango said, getting up. She stopped suddenly and looked at her brother in wonder. "Did you just call me…?"
"What?" asked Kohaku as Kagome and Miroku started to look at him funny.
" 'Ane-ue.' You called me 'Ane-ue,'" Sango said in surprise.
"I'm sorry. It just slipped out," Kohaku apologized, feeling nervous.
"Then, you don't remember?" asked Sango, sounding disappointed.
"Remember…?" Kohaku asked, but decided that he didn't want to know.
"Never mind," Sango said, shaking her head. "Let's get you home."
"I'll go with you," Kagome said. "Souta and Shippou need to get home, too. And no 'buts,'" she said, cutting off their protests.
"I shall escort you and Kagome," Miroku said. "It's not safe anywhere now." Sango nodded her consent and they started to exit the house.
"See you tomorrow, Inuyasha," Kagome called.
"See you guys later!" Inuyasha waved good-bye.
All the way back, the group walked in silence. Finally, Sango spoke.
"Before I died, I realized that the reason Kohaku never returned to my side was because he didn't want to remember what he had done. He didn't want to remember what had happened to him," Sango said in a soft voice. Kohaku looked questioningly at his sister but she just rubbed his head affectionately. "I'm talking about my past life, Kohaku. Did you know that in my past life, I had a brother named Kohaku also? He looked and acted exactly like you."
"Are you dreaming?" Kohaku asked, worried for his sister's health. She shook her head, smiling sadly.
"All this that I've been doing for the past few weeks concern my past life. I was chasing after Naraku because of something done in the past. But now, I'm hunting him down for what he did to you," Sango said, her voice turning cold.
"Who's Naraku?" Kohaku asked, but he didn't really want to know.
"He was the demon that destroyed my family in my past life," Sango said, doing her best to keep the anger out of her voice.
"Oh," Kohaku said, wishing that his sister would stop talking about such things. She was making him nervous.
"You don't want me to talk about this, do you?" Sango asked curiously. He hesitantly shook his head. "It's just as I thought… Guys, I think I realize what's wrong with Inuyasha." They all stared at her, wondering if the afternoon's events had made her crazy.
"What's wrong with Inuyasha?" asked Shippou.
"He's probably just like Kohaku," Sango said, getting more confident with her hypothesis with every step. "He doesn't want to remember. That's why no matter what happens, and no matter what we do to try to get him to remember, he can't."
"What do you mean?" asked Kagome, wondering why would Inuyasha not want to remember what happened in the past.
"Inuyasha didn't exactly live an ideal life, you know," Sango said, "If you lived his life, would you like to remember what happened? Would you spent your next life living in the shadow of your past life?"
"But we all have our own sorrows and pain," Miroku said, "Surely Inuyasha is strong enough to live those emotions again."
"We're not talking about a case of strength here," Sango said. "We're talking about emotions. Would you like to feel pain if you didn't have to?"
"I suppose not," Miroku answered, starting to consider Sango's theory.
"Kohaku didn't remember until our lives were in danger because of Naraku," Sango said, her voice amazingly steady and calm. "It is likely that Inuyasha will never remember what happened in the past if he's preventing himself from remembering. Only if our lives are in danger will he have the possible chance of remembering."
"How do you know Inuyasha is preventing himself from remembering?" demanded Shippou. "Maybe he just can't remember."
"Shippou, we've tried to get him to remember, and even when his own life was in danger, and things of the past appeared before him, he still didn't remember," Sango said. "You would think that if he saw something familiar, he would suddenly remember, but it hasn't been like that. The methods that worked on Miroku and I aren't working on Inuyasha."
"That sounds logical," Miroku said. "It does sort of seem like Inuyasha is trying to stop himself from remembering. All that youki that he absorbed might be to place a seal on his own memories. That would explain why every time he absorbed youki, he seemed to have some sort of amnesia."
"But what about the time when he sucked all of his family's youki?" Shippou asked, still unconvinced that Inuyasha would ever want to stop himself from remembering. "Kagome never mentioned that he was having amnesia or anything."
"That's true. Inuyasha didn't forget anything that time," Miroku said, a puzzled expression on his face. "And he absorbed an awful lot that time, too…"
"I don't have the answers to everything," Sango said. "All I have are guesses. I don't know why he didn't forget that time, but…"
"Maybe Inuyasha did not want to forget what had happened at that moment?" asked Kohaku, trying to be helpful.
"It may be logical that Inuyasha decided not to seal his entire memories that time because he may not have wanted to forget what Naraku did to him," Miroku said, trying to solve the puzzle. "If he forgot, then his family would be susceptible to danger. Maybe Inuyasha wanted to forget, but I'm sure Musashino would never allow himself to forget his family's enemies."
"Guys," Kagome interrupted in a small voice. "I think it's the Shikon no Tama."
"What about the Shikon no Tama?" asked Sango, looking at her friend.
"He saw the Shikon no Tama after he woke up. The Shikon no Tama appeared when that scorpion attacked him. He has the Shikon no Tama. So…" Kagome looked unsure about what she had to say, but she said it anyway. "Maybe he's borrowing the power from the Shikon no Tama to bury his own memories?"
"It's probable," Miroku said, frowning. "That would make sense since none of this weird stuff happened before his little visit to the hospital."
"So Inuyasha is using the Shikon no Tama to keep himself from remembering?" asked Sango.
"He's probably using the Shikon no Tama and youkai's youki to block his memories," Miroku said, the picture forming before him.
"I think everything makes sense now," Souta said, trying to follow along with their train of thought.
"But then we still have the problem of getting Inuyasha to remember. That is, if he wants to," Kagome said, trying to hide her own jumbled opinions about the matter from her friends. They approached near her home, and Mrs. Higurashi walked a bit out towards them.
"Kagome!" her mother called. "Souta! Shippou! Hurry up already. It's getting late."
"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Kagome asked as she led Shippou and Souta up the stairs.
"Bye, Kagome," Sango called after her friend.
"See you tomorrow," Miroku said.
The three soon left the shrine and continued on, watching the city light up as night descended upon them. Sango walked next to Miroku, and Kohaku trailed behind them. A moment later, Sango and Miroku's hands found each other and the distance between them shortened. Suddenly Miroku let go of her hand.
"Miroku, what…?"
"I'm sorry, Sango," he apologized, looking away from her. "I don't think that you should join this battle against Naraku."
"Why?" demanded Sango. "I can fight just as well as the rest of you."
"It's not that," Miroku said, continuing to walk. "It's just that…"
"Miroku, is this one of your hare-brained attempts to protect me?" Sango asked, starting to look annoyed.
"Ah…"
"How many times do I have to tell you that I can take care of myself!" said Sango, "It's you that I'm worried about. Always going off by yourself on a suicide mission. Don't you know that there are people who care about you? Don't you have any concerns for others' feelings?"
"It's because I care that I do what I do," said Miroku, getting slightly irritated with how Sango was categorizing him as.
"If you care, then you should let others care about you too," she said, "Caring isn't a one sided thing. That'll only lead to tragedy, and unless you want to head for tragedy, you should stop trying to fix everything by yourself."
"And do what? Allow other people to get in danger because of me?" he asked. "You know I can't do that."
"Why do you always assume the worst, you pessimist?" asked Sango. "Have you ever thought that maybe if you had friends helping you, you would have a greater chance of surviving?"
"Oh, you mean like the last time I joined a group and instead most of the group ended up dead?" asked Miroku sarcastically.
"If we hadn't banded together, then we might have not survived as long as we did," she said, trying to be calm. "At least we got to know each other."
"And I got to see the people I care about die," Miroku said, turning away from her again. "Thanks, but no thanks. I rather do everything by myself."
"So you can do what? Spare others of feeling grief over your death?" demanded Sango angrily. "Do you honestly think that no one will miss you after you die? What are you trying to protect us from?"
"I have spent the majority of my life trying not to get close to anyone because of the fact that I did not want to have to hurt anyone like my father hurt me," Miroku shouted. "It would be against my conscience if I forced anyone to feel such a way for me," he added in a quiet voice.
"Miroku…" Sango said in a softer tone, "No one is being forced to be your friend. No one is being forced to stand by you."
"No one is ever forced to do something," Miroku said in an emotionless voice, "but they are forced to regret their actions later."
"Miroku!" Sango said, exasperated. "Why can't you just get it through your thick head that I love you and I would be willing to be with you till the very end," she said, her face flushing with slight embarrassment at her words. Miroku was blushing furiously also.
"Yeah, um, well… I-I don't want to have to see your end," he stammered, feeling at a loss for words all of a sudden.
"Don't be so selfish!" Sango said, not quite knowing what she was saying.
"Are you forcing me to see your death?" asked Miroku, trying to recover from his embarrassment.
"No one can ever force anyone else to do something," Sango said, throwing his own words back at him.
"All right, all right. I concede," he said, realizing that he could never win a verbal fight when pitted against a woman. "Though I don't know why you are so eager to jump to your death."
"You should know well why," Sango said, finding the pavement very interesting.
"Yeah, for your brother," Miroku teased.
"Miroku!"
"Fine, fine," he said, smiling. "Err, if it's okay with you, that is, I…I feel the same way for you," he added sheepishly.
"Why would you ask if it's okay?" asked Sango, trying to keep herself from turning completely red. "After all, the feeling is mutual."
She wasn't exactly surprised when Miroku took her hands in his again, enveloping it in his warmth. She looked up at him and their eyes locked. She had never realized how handsome he looked when the light from the shop window shone behind him. She could feel their heads leaning closer when…
"Get a room, you guys," Kohaku said, feeling grossed out by his sister's actions. "You're making me sick."
"Kohaku!" Sango shouted as Kohaku ran off to their home. "Uh… Sorry about that, Miroku but… I gotta go," she said, quickly running off into the night.
Miroku only smiled to himself as he headed to his own house. Things didn't exactly turn out the way he wanted, but he figured it was better this way.
Shippou was walking home from school by himself. Souta was having a field trip, so wouldn't be back home until later, and Kagome and Sango had gone off somewhere, giggling like madwomen. He couldn't remember if Inuyasha and Miroku had kendo club today, but the point was that he was walking home alone. He kicked at a nearby pebble, feeling bored. There was no one to talk to, and school had been pretty boring that day.
Just as he sighed, someone tapped him lightly on the shoulder.
"Kagome? What are you doing here?" he asked, wondering where Sango had gone.
"What? I can't walk a friend home anymore?" Kagome said. Shippou expected Kagome to smile and ruffle his hair, or show some other sign of affection, but she didn't. He wondered if he had done something wrong.
"Where's Sango?" he asked, continuing on his journey home.
"She's gone home," Kagome said, her blank face smiling all of a sudden. Shippou thought that she was acting a bit strange. Come to think of it, Kagome was wearing an awful amount of perfume today. Had she gone on a date with someone? Maybe she got into a fight with Inuyasha, which is why she's acting so weird. But there wasn't enough time for her to go on a date anyway, so why the perfume?
"What are you thinking?" she asked, breaking his train of thoughts.
"Nothing," Shippou answered, grinning childishly. "I was just thinking how nice it is that all of us are together again."
"Hmm," Kagome said, not really listening to him. "Listen, can I borrow the Shikon shard in your hand for a while?"
"Huh?" Shippou asked in surprise, wondering where that question had come from. "Why?"
"Oh… You know the Shikon shard grants youkai some temporary power, right?" asked Kagome. Shippou nodded cautiously. Was she saying that he was no longer needed, so the Shikon shard he held could be given to someone else?
"Since Musashino—I mean, Inuyasha's family is weak right now, I thought that maybe I could borrow your shard and give them a little boost," Kagome said reasonably. Was this what had been bothering her?
"Kagome, how come you don't want to use your Shikon shard?" Shippou asked, feeling uneasy around Kagome all of a sudden. It wasn't that he didn't want to give up the Shikon shard, it was just that her request seemed so odd in his ears…
"I… I don't want to haul so much of the Shikon shard around. It's much safer where it is," Kagome answered. "If I just take the little piece that you have, the loss won't be as great if I lose it."
"Okay…" Shippou said reluctantly, opening his palm and starting to get the shard out.
"Thanks, Shippou-kun," Kagome said. Shippou froze. Shippou-kun?
He quickly moved away from Kagome, closing his fist and protecting the shard that he held. This wasn't Kagome. Kagome had never before called him "Shippou-kun." So who was this?
"Shippou-chan, what's the matter?" asked Kagome, looking worried.
"Why did you just call me 'Shippou-kun'?" Shippou asked suspiciously. Could this person before him be Naraku?
"Don't be silly. I just thought that you were old enough and mature enough so that I could call you 'Shippou-kun' instead of 'Shippou-chan' now," Kagome said. That makes sense… "Don't get all paranoid on me," Kagome joked.
Is this really Kagome or am I really being paranoid? thought Shippou. But what if it isn't Kagome? What if I'm giving the Shikon shard to Naraku?
"I don't have all day," Kagome said rather impatiently. The perfume, the strange change of personality… Is this really not Kagome?
"All right," Shippou said, smiling deceivingly. "I'll give it to you," he said, opening his palm. "Don't you think it's funny that in this life Sango's family runs a bakery?" he asked.
"I don't know…" Kagome said, frowning. Shippou frowned along with her. Such a neutral answer didn't really tell him anything.
"And what a coincidence that someone who looks exactly like Kouga is here!" Shippou said boyishly. "Don't you think it's weird that Sango fell in love with Kouga in this lifetime?"
"Uh… Sure," Kagome answered. Shippou quickly moved away from her again, knowing for sure this time that this was definitely not Kagome. What kind of friend would not know the person whom her friend loved?
"Get away now before I blast you!" Shippou said, getting ready to fight to the death if need be.
"I suppose it is no use trying to convince you anymore," the person who looked like Kagome said. "But it really makes no difference to me. I will have that shard, even if it takes your blood to free it."
Shippou shivered in fear, but he would stand firm. This was definitely not Kagome. Kagome had entrusted him with the Shikon shard, and he was going to protect it, even if it cost him his life.
The person attacked him suddenly and without warning. Shippou barely dodged the first strike, and he had only dodged it thanks to the borrowed power from the Shikon shard. The person attacked again in a series of punches, giving Shippou little time to think of a plan.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a crowd start to gather around them, watching in awe as the two had their death match. They probably just thought that an older sister was training her younger brother. How very wrong they were.
Shippou knew that with so many spectators around, it wouldn't be wise of him to use any youkai power. Kagome had once said to him that she didn't want the people of her time to know because they weren't ready for the youkai world, so he couldn't use his youkai power now. All the people here would see, and he would have failed Kagome in his unspoken promise.
Suddenly, Shippou's opponent delivered a kick that he wasn't expecting. The hit connected with him and knocked him down, making him lose his wind.
As he tried to get his breath back, "Kagome" reached down and grabbed his hand. Shippou let out a punch, which didn't seem to faze his enemy at all.
"What's all the commotion about?" a familiar voice shouted out in the crowd. Shippou clenched his fist closed, determined not to let the enemy win. "Kagome? What are you doing?" asked Inuyasha.
"No! That's not—" Shippou shouted, but "Kagome" was faster than him and attacked Inuyasha. Inuyasha dodged the attack easily and grabbed Shippou away from her in the same movement.
"Tsk tsk tsk," Inuyasha grinned haughtily. "One would think that with all your years of experience, such a simple task would easily be accomplished," he said in a loud stage voice. "But alas, I fear that I have been wrong in my judgment of you." Shippou caught on to what he was doing. Inuyasha was trying to make everything seem like a play so the crowd wouldn't get suspicious about them.
"Lord! This knave has tried to lead me astray with promises of riches, but I resisted, Lord," Shippou said, making his expression grave. "I resisted for I would not betray you." Shippou was glad that he had lived long enough in the Sengoku Jidai to be able to pull that kind of language off.
"Be gone, Traitor!" Inuyasha said in a commanding voice. "Leave, lest the Gods of this land wreak their wrath upon you!"
The person who looked like Kagome frowned at them but left. They had won this battle.
"How do you like our play?" Inuyasha grinned at the audience, who applauded loudly. "Be on the lookout for the next one!" Inuyasha said cheerfully as the crowd dispersed.
"Don't tell me a thing," Inuyasha said before Shippou could say anything. "Someone just tried to steal your Shikon shard but you fought with them to keep it."
"How did you ever figure that out?" Shippou joked, starting to walk home again. He felt safe whenever Inuyasha was around. There was no doubt that this was the real one, for he had that distinct smell of nothingness around him, and whenever Shippou was with him, he felt a slight melodious hum come from the Shikon shard embedded in his hand.
"You know, the next time someone tries to kill you for the shard, just give it to them," Inuyasha said, surprising Shippou.
"But Inuyasha!" Shippou protested.
"It's much better that you were alive without the stupid shard than if you're dead," he said. "With that said, give me the shard."
"Huh?" Shippou wondered what was going on.
"Give the shard," Inuyasha said in a spooky voice. "Or I shall have to resort to bodily harm!"
"That's lame," Shippou said, turning away from Inuyasha.
"Oi! Don't ignore me!" Inuyasha said. "Aren't you afraid of what I might do to you?"
"Whatever," Shippou yawned, seemingly bored. He was glad, though. He was glad that Inuyasha cared enough to try to cheer him up.
"You're no fun at all," Inuyasha said, finally giving up his act.
"You should act more mature," Shippou said in a grown-up fashion.
"You're one to talk, kid," Inuyasha said, ruffling Shippou's hair for effect.
"Hey!" Shippou said, squirming away from Inuyasha. Suddenly a thought struck him. "Inuyasha, do you want to use the Shikon shard to help your family heal faster?"
"Nah," Inuyasha said. "They don't need a wimpy shard to help them heal."
"But the shard will help them heal faster than normal," Shippou said.
"Shippou, I can't give them the shards to help them heal because if I do, other youkai will realize that they have the shards, and then we'll be under attack," Inuyasha said. "That's the main reason why I don't want to use Shikon shards to help them."
"Oh," Shippou said, feeling slightly stupid.
"You don't have to worry about a thing," Inuyasha said. "My family's a tough lot. They'll be up and around in no time!"
Shippou knew that it wasn't true, but he didn't try to disagree with Inuyasha. He knew that Inuyasha was just trying to lessen the tension that had built up these last couple of days.
They were about to cross the road when Inuyasha suddenly stopped him.
"Aren't you going to give me your hand?" Inuyasha asked. "It would make me feel more at ease if I crossed the road this way instead of having you run whatever way you want."
Shippou was surprised at Inuyasha's request, but obeyed, feeling as if though he really was Inuyasha's brother. They crossed the road in the afternoon sun, and Shippou felt a certain calm happiness that he hadn't felt in a long time.
Author's Note: At the rate I'm writing this, this story isn't going to end anytime soon (sorry about that!) ^_^
I don't know about you, but I hate it when something ends. Of course if something never ends (like pokemon) that kind of pisses me off too.
For anyone who cares, the reason I didn't update last week was because 1.) I was stuck in traffic for a couple hours because my sister decided that she just had to eat at this one restaurant that's kind of far away, so we ended up driving all the way over there (facing traffic on the entire way) and when we got there, we found out that the restaurant had closed and was probably relocating to another place, so we had to drive all the way back (still facing traffic). 2.) My lovely teachers decided that it was a great time to give lots of wonderful reports for us to do, not to mention study for a whole bunch of different quizzes that were coming up.
Anyway…
Thanks for all the nice reviews you people are giving me. It makes me get all enthusiastic about writing. However, I really need to know if I need improvements. If you feel like it, please leave some criticism or areas of improvement, okay?