Scene 678
NAT: After his escape, Dorian runs into Basil Spice, the Spice Boy, at Dorian's house.
Dorian: "Oregano! I haven't seen you in years!"
Basil: "I've been abroad. Lately, people have been saying horrible things about you! Your reputation is being ruined! And my name's Basil, not Oregano."
Dorian: "Do you believe them, Garlic?"
Basil: "Of course not. If you were doing horrible things, I'd know. And my name is Basil!"
Dorian: "How would you know, Mint?"
Basil: "I'd see it in your vase. And that's Basil!!!"
Dorian: "What if I told you vases can lie, Parsley?"
Basil: "What are you saying? Because my name is BASIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Dorian: "Maybe I'm evil. If my vase is a truth, how would you ever know the real lies about me?"
Basil: "I would have to see your soup, I suppose. That's possible. NOT!!!"
Dorian: "But it is, thanks to you. You can see my soup now. Come. Finish my sentence for me."
NAT: As the clock strikes down a mouse, Dorian leads Basil to the kitchen, still hidden behind a curtain.
Dorian: "You're the one person who deserves to know the truth. Open that curtain and see my soup!"
NAT: The Spice Boy cries out with horror as he sees the hideous food on the canvas.
Basil: "What have you done to my painting?!"
Dorian: "Twenty years ago I spilled soup on it and never cleaned it up! Cool, huh?"
Basil: "If that's true, then you're worse than people say you are! You freak-a-zoid!"
Dorian: "That's right. And this never would have happened if it weren't for you. It's all your fault! You, uh, freakier-a-zoid!"
NAT: Raging, Dorian crushes Basil's skull with a candleabra-kadabra. Basil collapses and dies. The painting gets uglier on the spot. Spooky. Dorian talks to it. Dorian has lost it at this point.
Dorian: "You made me a monster! I'll destroy you, just like I should have 20 years ago!"
NAT: Out on the street, a cop hears a terrible crash and a crash. He bursts into the house.
Cop: "Mr. Gary? Are you all right?"
Dorian: "That's 'Gray.' And I'm dead."
NAT: In the next room, the cop sees a beautiful portrait of Dorian Gary.
Dorian: "That's 'Gray.'"
NAT: Under the painting, on the floor is a rug. On the rug is a dead thing with a knife in its heart. Its face is ugly, ugly, ugly, but still somehow ugly....
Cop: "It can't be! But it is! It's Dorian Gary! True, I've never met the man before, but still I mysteriously know what he looks like and that this is his house!"
Dorian's Corpse: "That's 'Gray'!"
NAT: Outside, a distant rumble of hunger disturbs the calm, clear night. Spooky.
(Proceed to final page)
NAT: After his escape, Dorian runs into Basil Spice, the Spice Boy, at Dorian's house.
Dorian: "Oregano! I haven't seen you in years!"
Basil: "I've been abroad. Lately, people have been saying horrible things about you! Your reputation is being ruined! And my name's Basil, not Oregano."
Dorian: "Do you believe them, Garlic?"
Basil: "Of course not. If you were doing horrible things, I'd know. And my name is Basil!"
Dorian: "How would you know, Mint?"
Basil: "I'd see it in your vase. And that's Basil!!!"
Dorian: "What if I told you vases can lie, Parsley?"
Basil: "What are you saying? Because my name is BASIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Dorian: "Maybe I'm evil. If my vase is a truth, how would you ever know the real lies about me?"
Basil: "I would have to see your soup, I suppose. That's possible. NOT!!!"
Dorian: "But it is, thanks to you. You can see my soup now. Come. Finish my sentence for me."
NAT: As the clock strikes down a mouse, Dorian leads Basil to the kitchen, still hidden behind a curtain.
Dorian: "You're the one person who deserves to know the truth. Open that curtain and see my soup!"
NAT: The Spice Boy cries out with horror as he sees the hideous food on the canvas.
Basil: "What have you done to my painting?!"
Dorian: "Twenty years ago I spilled soup on it and never cleaned it up! Cool, huh?"
Basil: "If that's true, then you're worse than people say you are! You freak-a-zoid!"
Dorian: "That's right. And this never would have happened if it weren't for you. It's all your fault! You, uh, freakier-a-zoid!"
NAT: Raging, Dorian crushes Basil's skull with a candleabra-kadabra. Basil collapses and dies. The painting gets uglier on the spot. Spooky. Dorian talks to it. Dorian has lost it at this point.
Dorian: "You made me a monster! I'll destroy you, just like I should have 20 years ago!"
NAT: Out on the street, a cop hears a terrible crash and a crash. He bursts into the house.
Cop: "Mr. Gary? Are you all right?"
Dorian: "That's 'Gray.' And I'm dead."
NAT: In the next room, the cop sees a beautiful portrait of Dorian Gary.
Dorian: "That's 'Gray.'"
NAT: Under the painting, on the floor is a rug. On the rug is a dead thing with a knife in its heart. Its face is ugly, ugly, ugly, but still somehow ugly....
Cop: "It can't be! But it is! It's Dorian Gary! True, I've never met the man before, but still I mysteriously know what he looks like and that this is his house!"
Dorian's Corpse: "That's 'Gray'!"
NAT: Outside, a distant rumble of hunger disturbs the calm, clear night. Spooky.
(Proceed to final page)