~A Once and Again Series~
Life is what you make of it
Hey, thanks everyone for the encouraging comments! I don't know where the story will head exactly. I just hope you all will like it! Thanks so much! Lots of love ~ Taintedlove.
Chapter 21//But that's over
Grace happily ascended the stairs. She was about to enter into her room her Jessie's voice called out to her.
"Grace!"
Grace continued down the hall, and saw Jessie sitting on the stairs that led up to the attic. She smiled at her stepsister. "Oh, hi, Jessie. What is it?"
Jessie didn't smile at back at her, just stood up and asked, "Can we talk in my room?"
"Sure," Grace said, shrugging. She followed Jessie up the stairs, wondering what she had done to make Jessie angry at her this time. Grace didn't really care if Jessie was mad at her though, she was still reeling from her time with Eli alone in his garage.
Jessie sat on the edge of her bed and waited for Grace to sit. Grace pulled out the desk chair and sat down. They looked at each other. Finally Jessie said, "I know."
Grace raised her eyebrows in confusion, "About what?"
"About you and.." Jessie began.
"Oh! About me and Eli. Yeah, we're together now," Grace said with a smile. She waited for Jessie to smile and be excited, since she was always telling Grace that she and Eli should be together. But Jessie just sat there, stoned face.
"No.. I mean I know about that, but I also know about you and Mr. Dmitri," Jessie explained.
"Oh," Grace muttered. She paused and waited for Jessie to say exactly what she knew.
"I know you were dating him before you got with Eli-Katie told me," Jessie shook her head, "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Jessie, I'm sorry. It's not exactly the kind of information you go around telling people. Katie only found out because she was there when Mr. Dimitri called me." Grace sighed, her happy bubble deflating. She didn't want to talk about this. She just wanted to think about Eli and reminisce. But no matter how hard she tried to avoid thinking or talking about Augustus, it always happened.
"Katie said he told you he loved you!" Jessie said.
"Yeah, so?" Grace tried to back out of this conversation. She looked towards the door. Maybe she should just run for it.
"So he loved you and you loved him?" Jessie asked. She looked intently at Grace and waited for an answer.
"Yeah, I loved him. But that's over." Grace insisted.
"How can you go from loving Mr. Dimitri one day to sleeping with Eli the next?!"
Grace gasped. She didn't realize Jessie knew about that. Grace didn't even want to know how Jessie had found that out. "Jessie, it's not like that!"
"Isn't it? You loved Mr. Dimitri.. you carried on this secret relationship with him and now suddenly you've changed your mind and you think you love Eli?" Jessie's eyes sparked with anger.
"Jessie, I do love Eli, I do. You don't know everything. You don't understand. I'm with Eli now and he's the one I love!" Grace realized she was shouting and lowered her voice, "Can't you understand that?"
Jessie shook her head, "No, Grace, I can't. But I do know Eli is happy with you. So, just don't hurt him, ok? As long as you're with Eli you have to forget completely about Mr. Dimitri. Otherwise, you'll just end up hurting Eli. And I'm not going to let you do that to my brother!"
"I won't hurt him, Jessie! I promise I won't." Grace forced the words out. She knew it was what Jessie wanted to hear. But for her it was just another promise she didn't know if she'd be able to keep. She wanted to keep it. She didn't want to hurt Eli, but in the end she just might in spite of all her promises and good intentions. "I'm going to go." Grace stood up, took one last look at Jessie who was deep in thought, and left the attic. Grace knew if she did end up hurting Eli, she'd also be hurting Jessie. Jessie wanted the best for her brother, and Grace just hoped she could be that.
* * *
Grace entered Mr. Dimitri's classroom that last day before winter break with dread. This would be her last class with him. The course would be over and she'd start on her new schedule when she came back after break. It hurt. Grace knew it shouldn't hurt, but it still did. Grace knew she should be happy that she wasn't going to be seeing Augustus every day from now on. She should take it as a chance to finally rid her thoughts of Augustus all together. But Grace didn't know if she could do that. She knew there would always be some part of her that still belonged to her first real love. But now she was with Eli and she should be glad to be free of having to see Augustus every weekday. But she just wasn't glad. She felt a mix of dread, terror and sadness.
Grace felt like this might mean the end of her and Augustus forever. Oh, she knew she'd probably see him in the halls every once and a while, but would it be the same? Augustus had been more than her boyfriend, he had been a teacher, a mentor and most of all a friend. Grace didn't want to lose that forever. She wished she and Augustus could at least still be friends, but Grace knew that could never happen. Eli wouldn't like it for one, and Grace knew it would be too tempting for her. That she could too easily fall back on the other side of the fence. So, they couldn't be friends. And now after this semester ended, Grace knew he wouldn't even be her teacher anymore. And he had been such a great teacher. She was losing him as all these other things, and it hurt.
"Thank you all for being such a great class this semester. Hopefully most of you got good grades, and more important hopefully, you'll all take something from this course that can be used again. Hopefully, you all learned something," Augustus said at the end of the class. Grace forced back tears: it was truly the end.
"Remember, I teach Great Poets in the twenty century course along with my other English courses," Augustus added, "I would really love to see you all in it next year. And.." The bell rung, "Class is dismissed! Have a wonderful break everyone and keep up the good work in your classes!"
The students stayed sitting. Grace looked around in surprise. Only Tad had risen. He went to Mr. Dimitri's desk and handed him a wrapped present. "Mr. Dimitri, on behalf of the entire class, we would like to give you this as a gesture of our thanks to you. Everyone chipped in."
Grace's face flushed and she dropped her head. She hadn't chipped in! She would have, but she didn't know about it! Grace looked up again and saw Mr. Dimitri holding a leather-bound journal. "We figured that since you've always made us write in our journals for you, it's about time you had your own journal to read," Tad explained and Mr. Dimitri looked happily at the present.
"It's wonderful. Thanks to everyone!" Mr. Dimitri said and that seemed to be the key words as everyone rose from their seats and began to leave. Some stopped to talk with Mr. Dimitri. Grace took one glance at the crowd around him and left. She saw Katie walking ahead of her in the hall.
"Katie!"
Katie turned and smiled, "Hi Grace."
"How come nobody told me about the present? I would have chipped in." Grace told her.
"Oh," Katie shrugged, "That was my fault. I know that.." Katie lowered her voice, "That you and him broke up. And that you're with Eli now. I just figured that you wouldn't want to be a part of it. But, don't worry, everyone thinks you chipped in-I gave them the money for your share."
"Oh, thanks," Grace said dully. She looked back in the direction she just came from, "I think I forgot something.."
Grace looked at Katie, but saw she wasn't buying it. "Is it really a good idea you talk to him, Grace?"
"No, I don't think it is, but I have to! I just have to. Just don't tell Jessie, ok?" Grace pleaded, knowing it was a lot to ask.
Katie just smiled, "Tell her what? That you forgot something?"
"Thanks!" Grace turned and headed back to Mr. Dimitri's classroom. She knew she shouldn't go talk to him, but she had to. She felt drawn to him, like a magnet. Besides, just talking to him couldn't hurt anything, could it?
* * *
Life is what you make of it
Hey, thanks everyone for the encouraging comments! I don't know where the story will head exactly. I just hope you all will like it! Thanks so much! Lots of love ~ Taintedlove.
Chapter 21//But that's over
Grace happily ascended the stairs. She was about to enter into her room her Jessie's voice called out to her.
"Grace!"
Grace continued down the hall, and saw Jessie sitting on the stairs that led up to the attic. She smiled at her stepsister. "Oh, hi, Jessie. What is it?"
Jessie didn't smile at back at her, just stood up and asked, "Can we talk in my room?"
"Sure," Grace said, shrugging. She followed Jessie up the stairs, wondering what she had done to make Jessie angry at her this time. Grace didn't really care if Jessie was mad at her though, she was still reeling from her time with Eli alone in his garage.
Jessie sat on the edge of her bed and waited for Grace to sit. Grace pulled out the desk chair and sat down. They looked at each other. Finally Jessie said, "I know."
Grace raised her eyebrows in confusion, "About what?"
"About you and.." Jessie began.
"Oh! About me and Eli. Yeah, we're together now," Grace said with a smile. She waited for Jessie to smile and be excited, since she was always telling Grace that she and Eli should be together. But Jessie just sat there, stoned face.
"No.. I mean I know about that, but I also know about you and Mr. Dmitri," Jessie explained.
"Oh," Grace muttered. She paused and waited for Jessie to say exactly what she knew.
"I know you were dating him before you got with Eli-Katie told me," Jessie shook her head, "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Jessie, I'm sorry. It's not exactly the kind of information you go around telling people. Katie only found out because she was there when Mr. Dimitri called me." Grace sighed, her happy bubble deflating. She didn't want to talk about this. She just wanted to think about Eli and reminisce. But no matter how hard she tried to avoid thinking or talking about Augustus, it always happened.
"Katie said he told you he loved you!" Jessie said.
"Yeah, so?" Grace tried to back out of this conversation. She looked towards the door. Maybe she should just run for it.
"So he loved you and you loved him?" Jessie asked. She looked intently at Grace and waited for an answer.
"Yeah, I loved him. But that's over." Grace insisted.
"How can you go from loving Mr. Dimitri one day to sleeping with Eli the next?!"
Grace gasped. She didn't realize Jessie knew about that. Grace didn't even want to know how Jessie had found that out. "Jessie, it's not like that!"
"Isn't it? You loved Mr. Dimitri.. you carried on this secret relationship with him and now suddenly you've changed your mind and you think you love Eli?" Jessie's eyes sparked with anger.
"Jessie, I do love Eli, I do. You don't know everything. You don't understand. I'm with Eli now and he's the one I love!" Grace realized she was shouting and lowered her voice, "Can't you understand that?"
Jessie shook her head, "No, Grace, I can't. But I do know Eli is happy with you. So, just don't hurt him, ok? As long as you're with Eli you have to forget completely about Mr. Dimitri. Otherwise, you'll just end up hurting Eli. And I'm not going to let you do that to my brother!"
"I won't hurt him, Jessie! I promise I won't." Grace forced the words out. She knew it was what Jessie wanted to hear. But for her it was just another promise she didn't know if she'd be able to keep. She wanted to keep it. She didn't want to hurt Eli, but in the end she just might in spite of all her promises and good intentions. "I'm going to go." Grace stood up, took one last look at Jessie who was deep in thought, and left the attic. Grace knew if she did end up hurting Eli, she'd also be hurting Jessie. Jessie wanted the best for her brother, and Grace just hoped she could be that.
* * *
Grace entered Mr. Dimitri's classroom that last day before winter break with dread. This would be her last class with him. The course would be over and she'd start on her new schedule when she came back after break. It hurt. Grace knew it shouldn't hurt, but it still did. Grace knew she should be happy that she wasn't going to be seeing Augustus every day from now on. She should take it as a chance to finally rid her thoughts of Augustus all together. But Grace didn't know if she could do that. She knew there would always be some part of her that still belonged to her first real love. But now she was with Eli and she should be glad to be free of having to see Augustus every weekday. But she just wasn't glad. She felt a mix of dread, terror and sadness.
Grace felt like this might mean the end of her and Augustus forever. Oh, she knew she'd probably see him in the halls every once and a while, but would it be the same? Augustus had been more than her boyfriend, he had been a teacher, a mentor and most of all a friend. Grace didn't want to lose that forever. She wished she and Augustus could at least still be friends, but Grace knew that could never happen. Eli wouldn't like it for one, and Grace knew it would be too tempting for her. That she could too easily fall back on the other side of the fence. So, they couldn't be friends. And now after this semester ended, Grace knew he wouldn't even be her teacher anymore. And he had been such a great teacher. She was losing him as all these other things, and it hurt.
"Thank you all for being such a great class this semester. Hopefully most of you got good grades, and more important hopefully, you'll all take something from this course that can be used again. Hopefully, you all learned something," Augustus said at the end of the class. Grace forced back tears: it was truly the end.
"Remember, I teach Great Poets in the twenty century course along with my other English courses," Augustus added, "I would really love to see you all in it next year. And.." The bell rung, "Class is dismissed! Have a wonderful break everyone and keep up the good work in your classes!"
The students stayed sitting. Grace looked around in surprise. Only Tad had risen. He went to Mr. Dimitri's desk and handed him a wrapped present. "Mr. Dimitri, on behalf of the entire class, we would like to give you this as a gesture of our thanks to you. Everyone chipped in."
Grace's face flushed and she dropped her head. She hadn't chipped in! She would have, but she didn't know about it! Grace looked up again and saw Mr. Dimitri holding a leather-bound journal. "We figured that since you've always made us write in our journals for you, it's about time you had your own journal to read," Tad explained and Mr. Dimitri looked happily at the present.
"It's wonderful. Thanks to everyone!" Mr. Dimitri said and that seemed to be the key words as everyone rose from their seats and began to leave. Some stopped to talk with Mr. Dimitri. Grace took one glance at the crowd around him and left. She saw Katie walking ahead of her in the hall.
"Katie!"
Katie turned and smiled, "Hi Grace."
"How come nobody told me about the present? I would have chipped in." Grace told her.
"Oh," Katie shrugged, "That was my fault. I know that.." Katie lowered her voice, "That you and him broke up. And that you're with Eli now. I just figured that you wouldn't want to be a part of it. But, don't worry, everyone thinks you chipped in-I gave them the money for your share."
"Oh, thanks," Grace said dully. She looked back in the direction she just came from, "I think I forgot something.."
Grace looked at Katie, but saw she wasn't buying it. "Is it really a good idea you talk to him, Grace?"
"No, I don't think it is, but I have to! I just have to. Just don't tell Jessie, ok?" Grace pleaded, knowing it was a lot to ask.
Katie just smiled, "Tell her what? That you forgot something?"
"Thanks!" Grace turned and headed back to Mr. Dimitri's classroom. She knew she shouldn't go talk to him, but she had to. She felt drawn to him, like a magnet. Besides, just talking to him couldn't hurt anything, could it?
* * *