~A Once and Again Series~
Life is what you make of it
Chapter 26//Half of your heart
"So, after school?" Grace asked.
"Yes." Eli kissed her softly.
Grace smiled up at him and they got into the car. Jessie stared at them from the backseat.
"What were you two talking about?" Jessie asked curiously.
Eli looked back at his sister and shrugged, "Grace and I are going to take a lesson from you and Katie. We're going to tell Dad and Lily after school today."
"That's great," Jessie said cheerfully, but Grace felt like Jessie's eyes hid a bit of coldness in them. Jessie hadn't treated Grace the same since she found out about Mr. Dimitri and her. Grace knew Jessie didn't trust her, but she didn't know how to change that.
"I just hope they take it okay," Grace said quietly. She looked out the window as the car drove on.
"Me too," Eli said and he squeezed her hand. Their eyes met for a brief second.
In the back Jessie looked away.
* * *
Eli watched as Grace walked towards the school, before putting the car into drive. He didn't know what he was going to do to pass the time today. He had no work today, and sitting around the house worrying over what they were going to do in a few hours didn't sound fun.
Eli pulled into the driveway and shut off the engine. He began to head to the garage, but changed his mind. He had never got to listen to the CD Grace had made him. Eli entered the empty house and went up the stairs.
At first he couldn't see the CD anywhere, but then saw the edge of it poking out from under a pile of clothes on Grace's desk. Eli pulled the CD out and turned to leave the room, but then he saw the leather-covered book on Grace's bed. Eli looked around, feeling guilty for no reason and moved towards it.
He picked it up, and noticed there was no title on the cover. He opened it, only planning on finding the title page to see what it was. But even after he saw the title: Love is Never Lost: a collection by William Timor Timonen, he found his fingers still turning the page. Grace wouldn't care if he read it. Poetry had never been his thing, but he could give it a try for Grace.
But he never got past the third page. Tucked inside the third page was a small square of paper that said: Merry Christmas from Santa. The book must be a Christmas gift from someone, Eli thought and then he noticed the inscription.
Grace,
This book is one of my favorites
It means everything
Love always Augustus
Eli shook his head at the words as the anger built up inside him. He closed the book with a thud and tossed it back on the bed. Leaving the CD behind too, Eli made his way downstairs and out of the house. He needed to think.
* * *
Grace looked for Augustus that first day back after vacation. There was no pretending she didn't. Her neck craned the hallways for his familiar red hair. She didn't see him. She could have easily gone to his classroom, where she would have definitely saw him, but that would involve admitting to herself that she wanted to see him. She couldn't do that, not just yet. But if she happened to run into him in the hall, that wouldn't be so bad. And then she could thank him for the beautiful book he gave her. But she never saw him.
* * *
Grace and Jessie headed towards Eli's car after school. Grace was walking slowly, carefully glancing at the teacher's parking lot. Jessie was walking faster and got to the car before her. Grace watched as Jessie opened the car to the front passenger seat. Jessie turned and looked at Grace as she slid into the seat. Grace felt a chill go down her at Jessie's coldness. But, Grace didn't mind, not really. Jessie would eventually get over this and see that Grace wasn't going to hurt Eli. And anyways, today was the day when she and Eli were going to tell their parents the news.
Grace got into the back seat and she caught Eli's eyes in the rearview mirror. Grace smiled at him, but he looked away. Grace began to get nervous. Had Eli changed his mind? Was he not ready to tell everyone? Grace sent the ride home, waiting to catch Eli's eyes with hers again, but she never did. She listened to Eli and Jessie talk about her math class in growing dread. Something wasn't right.
Finally they pulled into the driveway. Eli got out first, and headed straight to his garage. Jessie turned and gave Grace a questioning look, as if to say what did you do this time? And then Jessie got out and went into the house. Grace hurried after Eli, catching him right as he was about to close his door.
For a moment Grace thought he was going to slam it in her face, but Eli just sighed and let her in.
"What is it, Eli? What's wrong?" Grace asked.
Eli shook his head, and his brown eyes glared at her, "I found your book."
"My book?" Grace asked with a slight tremble in her voice as she thought: 'No, no.. please don't let him have seen it!'
"The one that is signed, Love always Augustus!" Eli turned away from her, "I knew you weren't over him."
"But I.. I am, Eli! He sent me the book, I didn't have anything to do with it!"
"You accepted it, didn't you? You kept it, and you read it, didn't you?"
"Well, yeah, but.." Grace grasped for an explanation, but found none.
"No buts, Grace. You still love him!" Eli turned back to her and Grace saw the pain on his face. "I knew what we had was too good to be true. But I thought I could trust you. But now I know I can't."
"Don't say that! I made a stupid mistake, but you're the one that I love, Eli!" Grace moved closer to him, but he backed away.
"No, Grace, I'm sick of having only half of your heart! He has the other half, and until you take that back, you won't be able to love me, only me."
"What do you want me to do?" Grace asked.
"I can't tell you that, Grace. You have to solve this yourself." Eli sighed. "Why don't you just go to him? Be with him?"
"Eli!" Grace shook her head, "No, I want to be with you!"
"Do you? Do you really?" Eli looked at her, and she found she couldn't answer. "That's what I thought." Eli gestured to the door, "Just go."
"Eli!" Grace pleaded one last time.
"Go!"
Grace left.
* * *
Judy came over later that day. She poured herself a glass of orange juice from the fridge and noticed Grace sitting at the table. Judy went over to her niece, "Hi Grace."
Grace looked up and Judy saw the sadness in her eyes. "Hi."
Judy looked around, no one else was nearby. "Grace, what's wrong?"
"You don't have to worry about keeping Eli and me a secret from my mom anymore," Grace said unhappily.
"Why? Did you tell them?" Judy asked, and then frowned, "Did they take it bad? Is that why you're upset?"
Grace shook her head, "No, it's not that."
"What is it?"
"Eli and I broke up," Grace blurted out.
"Oh, honey!" Judy drew Grace up in a hug. Grace took comfort in the hug and found the tears that she had refused to let fall earlier slide down her face.
* * *
Grace went up to her after an uncomfortable dinner, where Eli had refused to make eye contact with her and Jessie had stared accusingly at Grace. Finally she couldn't take it anymore and had excused herself. She just kept thinking that she and Eli were supposed to have been telling their parents about the two of them then, but instead Eli was giving her the cold shoulder, and Jessie was burning holes into the side of her head.
Grace turned on the light in her room and saw the book still lying where she had carelessly had left it. Next to it was the CD she had so carefully made Eli, picking only the songs that she knew he would like. Looking at the CD reminded her of the other half of his present, which she had never gotten to give to him.
Grace went to her closet and pulled out the cologne. With a sign, she opened it and sniffed the sweet musky scent. It smelled so nice. Grace smelt it again, spritzing the air with the bottle. As the scent washed over her, she sat up straight with a jolt. Now Grace realized why she had been so drawn to the cologne. It was Augustus' cologne, the one she had always loved. The one that she caught the scent of sometimes in class and more often when they were at his house.
Grace closed the cologne and put it back in the bag with guilt. She had bought Augustus' cologne to give to Eli. What kind of girlfriend was she? Everything Eli had said was true. He only had half of her heart. The other half belonged to Augustus. That wasn't fair to either of them. She had to change something. She couldn't let herself be split between them anymore. She had to make a choice.
* * *
Life is what you make of it
Chapter 26//Half of your heart
"So, after school?" Grace asked.
"Yes." Eli kissed her softly.
Grace smiled up at him and they got into the car. Jessie stared at them from the backseat.
"What were you two talking about?" Jessie asked curiously.
Eli looked back at his sister and shrugged, "Grace and I are going to take a lesson from you and Katie. We're going to tell Dad and Lily after school today."
"That's great," Jessie said cheerfully, but Grace felt like Jessie's eyes hid a bit of coldness in them. Jessie hadn't treated Grace the same since she found out about Mr. Dimitri and her. Grace knew Jessie didn't trust her, but she didn't know how to change that.
"I just hope they take it okay," Grace said quietly. She looked out the window as the car drove on.
"Me too," Eli said and he squeezed her hand. Their eyes met for a brief second.
In the back Jessie looked away.
* * *
Eli watched as Grace walked towards the school, before putting the car into drive. He didn't know what he was going to do to pass the time today. He had no work today, and sitting around the house worrying over what they were going to do in a few hours didn't sound fun.
Eli pulled into the driveway and shut off the engine. He began to head to the garage, but changed his mind. He had never got to listen to the CD Grace had made him. Eli entered the empty house and went up the stairs.
At first he couldn't see the CD anywhere, but then saw the edge of it poking out from under a pile of clothes on Grace's desk. Eli pulled the CD out and turned to leave the room, but then he saw the leather-covered book on Grace's bed. Eli looked around, feeling guilty for no reason and moved towards it.
He picked it up, and noticed there was no title on the cover. He opened it, only planning on finding the title page to see what it was. But even after he saw the title: Love is Never Lost: a collection by William Timor Timonen, he found his fingers still turning the page. Grace wouldn't care if he read it. Poetry had never been his thing, but he could give it a try for Grace.
But he never got past the third page. Tucked inside the third page was a small square of paper that said: Merry Christmas from Santa. The book must be a Christmas gift from someone, Eli thought and then he noticed the inscription.
Grace,
This book is one of my favorites
It means everything
Love always Augustus
Eli shook his head at the words as the anger built up inside him. He closed the book with a thud and tossed it back on the bed. Leaving the CD behind too, Eli made his way downstairs and out of the house. He needed to think.
* * *
Grace looked for Augustus that first day back after vacation. There was no pretending she didn't. Her neck craned the hallways for his familiar red hair. She didn't see him. She could have easily gone to his classroom, where she would have definitely saw him, but that would involve admitting to herself that she wanted to see him. She couldn't do that, not just yet. But if she happened to run into him in the hall, that wouldn't be so bad. And then she could thank him for the beautiful book he gave her. But she never saw him.
* * *
Grace and Jessie headed towards Eli's car after school. Grace was walking slowly, carefully glancing at the teacher's parking lot. Jessie was walking faster and got to the car before her. Grace watched as Jessie opened the car to the front passenger seat. Jessie turned and looked at Grace as she slid into the seat. Grace felt a chill go down her at Jessie's coldness. But, Grace didn't mind, not really. Jessie would eventually get over this and see that Grace wasn't going to hurt Eli. And anyways, today was the day when she and Eli were going to tell their parents the news.
Grace got into the back seat and she caught Eli's eyes in the rearview mirror. Grace smiled at him, but he looked away. Grace began to get nervous. Had Eli changed his mind? Was he not ready to tell everyone? Grace sent the ride home, waiting to catch Eli's eyes with hers again, but she never did. She listened to Eli and Jessie talk about her math class in growing dread. Something wasn't right.
Finally they pulled into the driveway. Eli got out first, and headed straight to his garage. Jessie turned and gave Grace a questioning look, as if to say what did you do this time? And then Jessie got out and went into the house. Grace hurried after Eli, catching him right as he was about to close his door.
For a moment Grace thought he was going to slam it in her face, but Eli just sighed and let her in.
"What is it, Eli? What's wrong?" Grace asked.
Eli shook his head, and his brown eyes glared at her, "I found your book."
"My book?" Grace asked with a slight tremble in her voice as she thought: 'No, no.. please don't let him have seen it!'
"The one that is signed, Love always Augustus!" Eli turned away from her, "I knew you weren't over him."
"But I.. I am, Eli! He sent me the book, I didn't have anything to do with it!"
"You accepted it, didn't you? You kept it, and you read it, didn't you?"
"Well, yeah, but.." Grace grasped for an explanation, but found none.
"No buts, Grace. You still love him!" Eli turned back to her and Grace saw the pain on his face. "I knew what we had was too good to be true. But I thought I could trust you. But now I know I can't."
"Don't say that! I made a stupid mistake, but you're the one that I love, Eli!" Grace moved closer to him, but he backed away.
"No, Grace, I'm sick of having only half of your heart! He has the other half, and until you take that back, you won't be able to love me, only me."
"What do you want me to do?" Grace asked.
"I can't tell you that, Grace. You have to solve this yourself." Eli sighed. "Why don't you just go to him? Be with him?"
"Eli!" Grace shook her head, "No, I want to be with you!"
"Do you? Do you really?" Eli looked at her, and she found she couldn't answer. "That's what I thought." Eli gestured to the door, "Just go."
"Eli!" Grace pleaded one last time.
"Go!"
Grace left.
* * *
Judy came over later that day. She poured herself a glass of orange juice from the fridge and noticed Grace sitting at the table. Judy went over to her niece, "Hi Grace."
Grace looked up and Judy saw the sadness in her eyes. "Hi."
Judy looked around, no one else was nearby. "Grace, what's wrong?"
"You don't have to worry about keeping Eli and me a secret from my mom anymore," Grace said unhappily.
"Why? Did you tell them?" Judy asked, and then frowned, "Did they take it bad? Is that why you're upset?"
Grace shook her head, "No, it's not that."
"What is it?"
"Eli and I broke up," Grace blurted out.
"Oh, honey!" Judy drew Grace up in a hug. Grace took comfort in the hug and found the tears that she had refused to let fall earlier slide down her face.
* * *
Grace went up to her after an uncomfortable dinner, where Eli had refused to make eye contact with her and Jessie had stared accusingly at Grace. Finally she couldn't take it anymore and had excused herself. She just kept thinking that she and Eli were supposed to have been telling their parents about the two of them then, but instead Eli was giving her the cold shoulder, and Jessie was burning holes into the side of her head.
Grace turned on the light in her room and saw the book still lying where she had carelessly had left it. Next to it was the CD she had so carefully made Eli, picking only the songs that she knew he would like. Looking at the CD reminded her of the other half of his present, which she had never gotten to give to him.
Grace went to her closet and pulled out the cologne. With a sign, she opened it and sniffed the sweet musky scent. It smelled so nice. Grace smelt it again, spritzing the air with the bottle. As the scent washed over her, she sat up straight with a jolt. Now Grace realized why she had been so drawn to the cologne. It was Augustus' cologne, the one she had always loved. The one that she caught the scent of sometimes in class and more often when they were at his house.
Grace closed the cologne and put it back in the bag with guilt. She had bought Augustus' cologne to give to Eli. What kind of girlfriend was she? Everything Eli had said was true. He only had half of her heart. The other half belonged to Augustus. That wasn't fair to either of them. She had to change something. She couldn't let herself be split between them anymore. She had to make a choice.
* * *