Disclaimer: I don't own the Gilmore Girls. I forgot to say that in
Chapter 1. I bet you thought I owned the Gilmore Girls, didn't you?
A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed!! Special shout outs to Someone and Angel Monroe! You both so completely rock and inspire me with your talent!
I'll be using dialog again from the "They Shoot Gilmores, Don't They?" episode. This is my version where Rory has a backbone. I thought about working Dean's alien abduction into the story (heh heh) but I'll save that plot line for another time. I'm also upping the rating to PG-13 as there's some cussing and errr . . . . .sexual innuendos in this chapter.
One more thing. . . . . let me just say that I am a complete dork and after trying to turn off the filter that denies anonymous reviews, it's still freaking on. Either ff.net is buggy (not completely implausible) or I am doing something wrong (also not completely implausible.) I'd love to get any reviews, even anonymous ones.we'll see if it's fixed for this installment.
There wasn't a lot of bullshit in my heaven. - Alice Sebold, The Lovely Bones
Rory emerged from the bathroom determined to find Dean. As she was searching the gymnasium for him, Jackson rushed past Rory, slightly bumping into her shoulder.
"So, I'm sure you have an opinion about this too. If not four in four, would three in three work better for you? Just let me know at the next town meeting because I'm sure it will be an agenda item open to discussion to everyone in Stars Hollow. Maybe we'll even hold a special referendum so we people can actually vote on it." Jackson angrily said to a very confused Rory.
Huffing, Jackson made his exit as Sookie caught up with Rory. "Are you OK honey?" Sookie asked her. "It looked like he clipped you."
"Am I supposed to understand what he was talking about?" Rory asked her knitting her eyebrows together and starting at Jackson's departing back.
"Nope. It's Jackson." Sookie replied kissing Rory's forehead before rushing after Jackson.
"Good point." Rory murmured.
"Rory!" Lorelei cried upon spotting her daughter. "Kirk is organizing a bunny hop. C'mon, we need to form a conga line before he gets everyone on his side."
"Mom, I need to. . . . ."
"I think Gloria Estefan may have been right, I actually feel the rhythm getting stronga." Lorelei continued.
"There's something important I have to. . . . ."
"I don't think I can control myself any longa." Lorelei rambled.
At that moment, Taylor resumed bullhorn duties. His voice boomed across the gymnasium "Dancers back to the dance floor in 10, 9, 8, 9, 8. . . . ."
"It's a countdown Taylor," Miss Patty informed him. "The numbers are supposed to go backwards from 10. You know, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6. . . . ."
"Are you trying to steal announcer duties from me?" a drunk Taylor drawled at Miss Patty. "I'm onto your scheme. I bet you're not even licensed to operate a megaphone."
As Taylor and Miss Patty continued to fight, Lorelei grabbed Rory's hand "C'mon, I want to get a spot where I can keep an eye on Kirk," Lorelei said. "I bet he's taking some sort of dance steroid drug that causes his feet to keep moving while the rest of him is actually asleep."
"But. . . . ." Rory started to protest before realizing that it was futile. She gave into her mother and allowed herself to be dragged back onto the dance floor.
"Lorelei," Kirk greeted her stiffly.
"Kirk," Lorelei replied in kind. "Still sleepwalking?"
"Sleepwalking?" Kirk asked slightly taken aback by her random question. "Not since the time that I sleepwalked into the kitchen and thought it was the bathroom. It was a little embarrassing since Reverend Keating was having tea with mother that evening."
"Please make him stop talking," a panicked Rory begged her mother.
"But since mother installed the baby guard rails on my bunk beds and started making me wear a cowbell to sleep, it really hasn't been a problem." Kirk continued.
"I'll never be able to shut my eyes again," Lorelei told Rory.
"Well, you asked him." Rory reminded to her mother, raising her eyebrows mischievously.
". . . . .and why did I do that?" Lorelei queried.
"Because you have an unnatural obsession with winning this marathon," Rory explained.
"Oh right," Lorelei smiled remembering her original agenda. "Thank you, offspring."
. . . . .Several dance marathon hours later. . . . .
Jess was still in the stands, reading one of his ever present books. Shane slept next to him as Dean reclined several rows behind them in the bleachers. Rory's eyes were shut and she leaned against Lorelei. Although equally tired, Lorelei essentially tried to hold Rory up, making sure that the two continued swaying to the music, if not actually dancing. Perking up slightly as Kirk waltzed by, Lorelei took a sudden, reckless step and snapped the heel off of her shoe. Jolted more awake from the sudden choppy movement, Rory stirred.
"My heel just broke off," Lorelei cried panicking. "Damn, these are brand new shoes."
"They were made in 1943," Rory reminded her.
"Well, I just bought them Tuesday." Lorelei whined.
"I told you not to wear vintage shoes," Rory reminded her again.
"but the lady at the store said they hadn't been worn a lot."
"Not a lot in 60 years is still probably a lot."
"I gotta fix them," Lorelei said. "Oh, I'll use my emergency card to leave the dance floor. I'll be right back"
"No!" cried Rory. "If you leave, there's no way I'll be able to keep standing up."
"10 minutes?"
"Nighty-night."
"Oh no! Wait. . . . ." Lorelei turned and searched the stands. "Dean! C'mere! I need you!"
Rory began to come more awake as she realized what her mother was doing. "Mom, no! I'm fine now. Really, look, dancing." Rory told her mother as she demonstrated her own version of the cabbage patch.
"You're going to hurt yourself, honey," Lorelei said to Rory. ". . . . .and don't do that in public when we're together."
Rory sighed and rolled her eyes as she looked over at Dean who had already walked onto the dance floor. Rory felt her lungs begin to constrict again.
"What?" Dean asked Lorelei.
"Here," Lorelei said taking Rory's arms and wrapping them around Dean's shoulders. "Hold her up. I'll be right back."
"Mom, it's OK," Rory assured her. "Look Dean, I'm standing. Dancing even. You can go back and sit down."
"Well, actually," Dean said realizing that Rory was in his arms, "This is kind of nice."
Rory stole a quick glance at the stands and saw that Jess was no longer reading his book but instead looking at her intently, angrily. Rory's pulse quickened as she returned her gaze to Dean. Without thinking, she backed several inches away from him and moved her hands from his shoulders to his arms. Trying to pull her close, Dean stepped towards her. Rory immediately backed up again, loosening her grip on his arms.
Dean instinctively tightened his grip on her waist and looked at her quizzically. "Rory, what's wrong?" he asked her.
"Nothing," Rory mumbled automatically, stealing another glance at Jess from the corner of her eye.
"Then why are you acting like I'm Pee Wee Herman?" Dean questioned.
Rory sighed looking up at him. "I don't really want to get into this with you right now."
"Get into what with me?" Dean pushed.
"Please let it drop. This is not the time or the place to discuss it." Rory attempted to reason with him.
"Not the time or place to discuss what? Why you're acting like I have leprosy?" Dean continued, not letting the issue drop.
"Yes. I mean, no," Rory stumbled as she tried to organize her thoughts.
"What is it you want to talk to me about Rory?" Dean demanded, squeezing his hands tighter on her waist.
Feeling irritated by the increased pressure from his embrace, and exasperated from his questions, Rory relented. "This. . . . Us. . . . Everything. . . . ."
Dean took a step back from her but didn't let go. "Oh my God, are you breaking up with me?" Dean looked at Rory with eyes that contained a frightening mixture of shock, pain, and anger.
Rory's eyes skimmed the still crowded gym. It was too public, too exposed. "C'mon, Dean. It doesn't have to be like this. Let's go outside where we can talk without an audience," Rory tried to reason with him.
"Fuck that," Dean exhaled, shaking his head. "I'm not going anywhere with you. Say what you have to say and say it quickly. I have a feeling that I'm not going to like it."
Eyes wide, Rory inhaled sharply at his use of the swear word. "Did you just say 'fuck'?" she asked him, her mind unable to process what she had just heard.
"Yeah, Rory, I did, " Dean answered sarcastically. "You have heard the word before, haven't you?"
Realizing that he was trying to intimidate and bully her, Rory exhaled a long breath and met his gaze. Holding burning eye contact with Dean and tilting her head to the side, she stated flatly "Once or twice."
"I'm waiting Rory," Dean continued abruptly. "What is it you want to say to me?
Resigning herself to having the conversation with him right there on the dance floor, Rory began. "Things between us have been bad for awhile, Dean."
"Right," Dean interrupted. "Ever since Jess came to town."
"No," Rory shot back at him. "Things were bad between us long before Jess ever stepped foot off that bus."
Laughing ruefully and raising his voice, Dean responded, "Cut the bullshit, Rory. Do you think I'm blind? You're into him and he's into you. I spent months trying to convince myself that it wasn't true but I must be an idiot."
"Stop it," Rory commanded. "I'm not going to let you twist this. This is not about Jess and me. It's about you and me. . . . .and what's not working and hasn't been working for a long, long time."
Dean opened his mouth to say something but Rory silenced him. "I'm not finished. See, I'm trying to tell you something and you're not listening to me, which is really not a surprise because this is what you do. You make assumptions about what I think, how I feel, and what I'm doing. Even though you constantly get it wrong, you completely tune me out when I try to explain to you what the truth is."
"Wait a minute. Are you trying to tell me that Jess has nothing to do with what's happened between us?" Dean asked, his voice low and frightening.
"No," Rory admitted. "I'm trying to tell you that our issues are bigger than Jess. Take him out of the equation and you and I are still too different to have survived."
"Bullshit," Dean cried again. He leaned in closer to her ear and in a menacing manner stated quietly, "Don't you think for once, you should actually be honest with me? Jess flirts with you. He excites you. . . . . sexually. . . . . .and you like it. That's what this is about."
Shocked into momentary silence, Rory squared her shoulders for the second time in one night. Straightening her spine, she stared at him before she continued. "What this is about," Rory hissed at Dean, "is you not wanting to lose. You've turned this into a contest between you and Jess with me as the prize. Guess what Dean. I'm not a 'thing' that you can win. In fact, I'm not a 'thing' at all. I'm a person with likes, dislikes, and dreams that I've come to understand mean nothing to you. I'm exhausted from trying to be what you want me to be. I can't do it anymore. I don't want to do it anymore."
"I'm such an idiot." Dean spat at her, shaking his head. "You said you loved me and I actually believed you."
"I did love you, Dean. I still do. I'm just not in love with you. I finally understand the difference."
"So you're going to be with him now, right?"
Rory scoffed at Dean, "Have you not been paying attention the past couple months? Jess has a girlfriend," she gestured at Jess and Shane in the bleachers and for the first time since the argument began, noticed Jess. He was staring at her with a shell-shocked expression on his face. A momentary thought about the volume of her argument with Dean flit across her mind before she continued in a low voice, "besides, he hates me now."
Dean smiled bitterly leaning closer to Rory. "Hell Rory, that's not hate," he explained. "That's passion. I thought you'd be able to tell the difference."
Rory looked momentarily stricken before Dean continued. He leaned close enough to her for his lips to brush her ear. She cringed as he whispered so only she could hear, "he wants your virginity. From what I can see, he's going to get it. Guys like him, that's all they want. You're going to wind up a pregnant 16-year old whore, just like your mom. Who will want you then, Rory?"
Her hand moved on it's own. Before she was even aware of what she was doing, she had slapped him across the face. Hard. Slightly stunned by her violent reaction, but too enraged to care, Rory looked up at Dean. "Don't you ever speak to me like that again," she said slowly and evenly ". . . . .and don't you EVER say anything bad about my mother."
Dean moved his hand to his face, touching the stinging skin where Rory had hit him. "Oh God, Rory," he said, his face falling. "I didn't mean that. I'm sorry."
Rory stepped back and looked at Dean. The look on her face was a mixture of pity and contempt. It was certainly not the look of a frightened child that Dean had expected to see.
Rory turned on her heel and calmly walked from the gymnasium.
Once she was outside and the cool air hit her lungs, she was carried forward by her adrenalin, moving faster and faster until she was running, breathing, crying.
'Well, that was a scene,' her head said.
"Shut up," Rory said.
'How do you feel?' her heart said.
"Shitty," Rory said.
'Yeah, yeah,' her heart said. 'We went through this routine in the bathroom. How do you really feel?'
"Pretty darn good." Rory admitted, smiling through her tears.
'That's my girl,' Her heart said.
A/N: Next up, Rory and Jess sitting on a bridge. Stay tuned!
A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed!! Special shout outs to Someone and Angel Monroe! You both so completely rock and inspire me with your talent!
I'll be using dialog again from the "They Shoot Gilmores, Don't They?" episode. This is my version where Rory has a backbone. I thought about working Dean's alien abduction into the story (heh heh) but I'll save that plot line for another time. I'm also upping the rating to PG-13 as there's some cussing and errr . . . . .sexual innuendos in this chapter.
One more thing. . . . . let me just say that I am a complete dork and after trying to turn off the filter that denies anonymous reviews, it's still freaking on. Either ff.net is buggy (not completely implausible) or I am doing something wrong (also not completely implausible.) I'd love to get any reviews, even anonymous ones.we'll see if it's fixed for this installment.
There wasn't a lot of bullshit in my heaven. - Alice Sebold, The Lovely Bones
Rory emerged from the bathroom determined to find Dean. As she was searching the gymnasium for him, Jackson rushed past Rory, slightly bumping into her shoulder.
"So, I'm sure you have an opinion about this too. If not four in four, would three in three work better for you? Just let me know at the next town meeting because I'm sure it will be an agenda item open to discussion to everyone in Stars Hollow. Maybe we'll even hold a special referendum so we people can actually vote on it." Jackson angrily said to a very confused Rory.
Huffing, Jackson made his exit as Sookie caught up with Rory. "Are you OK honey?" Sookie asked her. "It looked like he clipped you."
"Am I supposed to understand what he was talking about?" Rory asked her knitting her eyebrows together and starting at Jackson's departing back.
"Nope. It's Jackson." Sookie replied kissing Rory's forehead before rushing after Jackson.
"Good point." Rory murmured.
"Rory!" Lorelei cried upon spotting her daughter. "Kirk is organizing a bunny hop. C'mon, we need to form a conga line before he gets everyone on his side."
"Mom, I need to. . . . ."
"I think Gloria Estefan may have been right, I actually feel the rhythm getting stronga." Lorelei continued.
"There's something important I have to. . . . ."
"I don't think I can control myself any longa." Lorelei rambled.
At that moment, Taylor resumed bullhorn duties. His voice boomed across the gymnasium "Dancers back to the dance floor in 10, 9, 8, 9, 8. . . . ."
"It's a countdown Taylor," Miss Patty informed him. "The numbers are supposed to go backwards from 10. You know, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6. . . . ."
"Are you trying to steal announcer duties from me?" a drunk Taylor drawled at Miss Patty. "I'm onto your scheme. I bet you're not even licensed to operate a megaphone."
As Taylor and Miss Patty continued to fight, Lorelei grabbed Rory's hand "C'mon, I want to get a spot where I can keep an eye on Kirk," Lorelei said. "I bet he's taking some sort of dance steroid drug that causes his feet to keep moving while the rest of him is actually asleep."
"But. . . . ." Rory started to protest before realizing that it was futile. She gave into her mother and allowed herself to be dragged back onto the dance floor.
"Lorelei," Kirk greeted her stiffly.
"Kirk," Lorelei replied in kind. "Still sleepwalking?"
"Sleepwalking?" Kirk asked slightly taken aback by her random question. "Not since the time that I sleepwalked into the kitchen and thought it was the bathroom. It was a little embarrassing since Reverend Keating was having tea with mother that evening."
"Please make him stop talking," a panicked Rory begged her mother.
"But since mother installed the baby guard rails on my bunk beds and started making me wear a cowbell to sleep, it really hasn't been a problem." Kirk continued.
"I'll never be able to shut my eyes again," Lorelei told Rory.
"Well, you asked him." Rory reminded to her mother, raising her eyebrows mischievously.
". . . . .and why did I do that?" Lorelei queried.
"Because you have an unnatural obsession with winning this marathon," Rory explained.
"Oh right," Lorelei smiled remembering her original agenda. "Thank you, offspring."
. . . . .Several dance marathon hours later. . . . .
Jess was still in the stands, reading one of his ever present books. Shane slept next to him as Dean reclined several rows behind them in the bleachers. Rory's eyes were shut and she leaned against Lorelei. Although equally tired, Lorelei essentially tried to hold Rory up, making sure that the two continued swaying to the music, if not actually dancing. Perking up slightly as Kirk waltzed by, Lorelei took a sudden, reckless step and snapped the heel off of her shoe. Jolted more awake from the sudden choppy movement, Rory stirred.
"My heel just broke off," Lorelei cried panicking. "Damn, these are brand new shoes."
"They were made in 1943," Rory reminded her.
"Well, I just bought them Tuesday." Lorelei whined.
"I told you not to wear vintage shoes," Rory reminded her again.
"but the lady at the store said they hadn't been worn a lot."
"Not a lot in 60 years is still probably a lot."
"I gotta fix them," Lorelei said. "Oh, I'll use my emergency card to leave the dance floor. I'll be right back"
"No!" cried Rory. "If you leave, there's no way I'll be able to keep standing up."
"10 minutes?"
"Nighty-night."
"Oh no! Wait. . . . ." Lorelei turned and searched the stands. "Dean! C'mere! I need you!"
Rory began to come more awake as she realized what her mother was doing. "Mom, no! I'm fine now. Really, look, dancing." Rory told her mother as she demonstrated her own version of the cabbage patch.
"You're going to hurt yourself, honey," Lorelei said to Rory. ". . . . .and don't do that in public when we're together."
Rory sighed and rolled her eyes as she looked over at Dean who had already walked onto the dance floor. Rory felt her lungs begin to constrict again.
"What?" Dean asked Lorelei.
"Here," Lorelei said taking Rory's arms and wrapping them around Dean's shoulders. "Hold her up. I'll be right back."
"Mom, it's OK," Rory assured her. "Look Dean, I'm standing. Dancing even. You can go back and sit down."
"Well, actually," Dean said realizing that Rory was in his arms, "This is kind of nice."
Rory stole a quick glance at the stands and saw that Jess was no longer reading his book but instead looking at her intently, angrily. Rory's pulse quickened as she returned her gaze to Dean. Without thinking, she backed several inches away from him and moved her hands from his shoulders to his arms. Trying to pull her close, Dean stepped towards her. Rory immediately backed up again, loosening her grip on his arms.
Dean instinctively tightened his grip on her waist and looked at her quizzically. "Rory, what's wrong?" he asked her.
"Nothing," Rory mumbled automatically, stealing another glance at Jess from the corner of her eye.
"Then why are you acting like I'm Pee Wee Herman?" Dean questioned.
Rory sighed looking up at him. "I don't really want to get into this with you right now."
"Get into what with me?" Dean pushed.
"Please let it drop. This is not the time or the place to discuss it." Rory attempted to reason with him.
"Not the time or place to discuss what? Why you're acting like I have leprosy?" Dean continued, not letting the issue drop.
"Yes. I mean, no," Rory stumbled as she tried to organize her thoughts.
"What is it you want to talk to me about Rory?" Dean demanded, squeezing his hands tighter on her waist.
Feeling irritated by the increased pressure from his embrace, and exasperated from his questions, Rory relented. "This. . . . Us. . . . Everything. . . . ."
Dean took a step back from her but didn't let go. "Oh my God, are you breaking up with me?" Dean looked at Rory with eyes that contained a frightening mixture of shock, pain, and anger.
Rory's eyes skimmed the still crowded gym. It was too public, too exposed. "C'mon, Dean. It doesn't have to be like this. Let's go outside where we can talk without an audience," Rory tried to reason with him.
"Fuck that," Dean exhaled, shaking his head. "I'm not going anywhere with you. Say what you have to say and say it quickly. I have a feeling that I'm not going to like it."
Eyes wide, Rory inhaled sharply at his use of the swear word. "Did you just say 'fuck'?" she asked him, her mind unable to process what she had just heard.
"Yeah, Rory, I did, " Dean answered sarcastically. "You have heard the word before, haven't you?"
Realizing that he was trying to intimidate and bully her, Rory exhaled a long breath and met his gaze. Holding burning eye contact with Dean and tilting her head to the side, she stated flatly "Once or twice."
"I'm waiting Rory," Dean continued abruptly. "What is it you want to say to me?
Resigning herself to having the conversation with him right there on the dance floor, Rory began. "Things between us have been bad for awhile, Dean."
"Right," Dean interrupted. "Ever since Jess came to town."
"No," Rory shot back at him. "Things were bad between us long before Jess ever stepped foot off that bus."
Laughing ruefully and raising his voice, Dean responded, "Cut the bullshit, Rory. Do you think I'm blind? You're into him and he's into you. I spent months trying to convince myself that it wasn't true but I must be an idiot."
"Stop it," Rory commanded. "I'm not going to let you twist this. This is not about Jess and me. It's about you and me. . . . .and what's not working and hasn't been working for a long, long time."
Dean opened his mouth to say something but Rory silenced him. "I'm not finished. See, I'm trying to tell you something and you're not listening to me, which is really not a surprise because this is what you do. You make assumptions about what I think, how I feel, and what I'm doing. Even though you constantly get it wrong, you completely tune me out when I try to explain to you what the truth is."
"Wait a minute. Are you trying to tell me that Jess has nothing to do with what's happened between us?" Dean asked, his voice low and frightening.
"No," Rory admitted. "I'm trying to tell you that our issues are bigger than Jess. Take him out of the equation and you and I are still too different to have survived."
"Bullshit," Dean cried again. He leaned in closer to her ear and in a menacing manner stated quietly, "Don't you think for once, you should actually be honest with me? Jess flirts with you. He excites you. . . . . sexually. . . . . .and you like it. That's what this is about."
Shocked into momentary silence, Rory squared her shoulders for the second time in one night. Straightening her spine, she stared at him before she continued. "What this is about," Rory hissed at Dean, "is you not wanting to lose. You've turned this into a contest between you and Jess with me as the prize. Guess what Dean. I'm not a 'thing' that you can win. In fact, I'm not a 'thing' at all. I'm a person with likes, dislikes, and dreams that I've come to understand mean nothing to you. I'm exhausted from trying to be what you want me to be. I can't do it anymore. I don't want to do it anymore."
"I'm such an idiot." Dean spat at her, shaking his head. "You said you loved me and I actually believed you."
"I did love you, Dean. I still do. I'm just not in love with you. I finally understand the difference."
"So you're going to be with him now, right?"
Rory scoffed at Dean, "Have you not been paying attention the past couple months? Jess has a girlfriend," she gestured at Jess and Shane in the bleachers and for the first time since the argument began, noticed Jess. He was staring at her with a shell-shocked expression on his face. A momentary thought about the volume of her argument with Dean flit across her mind before she continued in a low voice, "besides, he hates me now."
Dean smiled bitterly leaning closer to Rory. "Hell Rory, that's not hate," he explained. "That's passion. I thought you'd be able to tell the difference."
Rory looked momentarily stricken before Dean continued. He leaned close enough to her for his lips to brush her ear. She cringed as he whispered so only she could hear, "he wants your virginity. From what I can see, he's going to get it. Guys like him, that's all they want. You're going to wind up a pregnant 16-year old whore, just like your mom. Who will want you then, Rory?"
Her hand moved on it's own. Before she was even aware of what she was doing, she had slapped him across the face. Hard. Slightly stunned by her violent reaction, but too enraged to care, Rory looked up at Dean. "Don't you ever speak to me like that again," she said slowly and evenly ". . . . .and don't you EVER say anything bad about my mother."
Dean moved his hand to his face, touching the stinging skin where Rory had hit him. "Oh God, Rory," he said, his face falling. "I didn't mean that. I'm sorry."
Rory stepped back and looked at Dean. The look on her face was a mixture of pity and contempt. It was certainly not the look of a frightened child that Dean had expected to see.
Rory turned on her heel and calmly walked from the gymnasium.
Once she was outside and the cool air hit her lungs, she was carried forward by her adrenalin, moving faster and faster until she was running, breathing, crying.
'Well, that was a scene,' her head said.
"Shut up," Rory said.
'How do you feel?' her heart said.
"Shitty," Rory said.
'Yeah, yeah,' her heart said. 'We went through this routine in the bathroom. How do you really feel?'
"Pretty darn good." Rory admitted, smiling through her tears.
'That's my girl,' Her heart said.
A/N: Next up, Rory and Jess sitting on a bridge. Stay tuned!