**Take me under
I'm giving in to you
I'm dying tonight
Tragic it seems, to be alone again
I'm giving in to you**

Giving In

It was cold. Jou was cold, and he didn't know where to go. Walking to the nearest building, he sat down and leaned against it. He shuddered. Why didn't he think about bringing a sweater? Or anything warm?

He sighed heavily and shook his head, then brought his pack closer to him, and searched it. Nothing! There was nothing in it to keep him warm. Jou sighed again, and grabbed for the alcohol. This could keep him warm. He screwed off the top and took two long swigs. He felt his eyes bug for a second. Jou smiled faintly. One step closer to dark oblivion.

Suddenly spotting a sheet of paper in his bag, he pulled it out and read. It was a house party. When had he gotten this? He thanked whatever gods were listening and headed for the address stated on the sheet. He arrived about 10 minutes later to a music-blaring house. People standing and drinking all around him. He smirked. This is where he needed to be.

He started towards the front door. As he reached for the handle, his hand was suddenly caught by a female's.

"Jou--ey?" A blonde-hair, blue-eyed girl stopped him.

He looked to her. It was the American girl that was on foreign exchange. What was her name again? She was always calling him Joey for some reason.

"... Allison?" Jou questioned.

The blonde giggled, "No silly, it's me, Rebecca!"

Jou feigned delight. "Oh! 'Becca! How've you been?"

She pouted, trying to look sexy, "... Lonely."

Jou stared at her. Beautiful girl ... that is, beautiful drunk girl, telling him she was ... Wait. Didn't this go against his morals?

Jou grinned. 'Of course not.' "Is that so?"

Rebecca grinned stupidly before faltering in her step, giggling, "Wanna make the lonliness go away, Jou--ey?"

Jou just grabbed her hand and pulled her into the house, immediately looking for the closest secluded spot; it seemed to be the bathroom. 'That'll do ...' he thought, and pulled her in.

Rebecca suddenly started groping and kissing Jou, pressing him against the wall. She made her way slowly down him, un-zipping his pants before pressing a kiss into his navel and continuing downward. Jou could feel himself get harder, waiting to be realeased.

Suddenly, Rebecca paused and fell forward on him, sliding slowly down until her head rested at his knees. Jou looked down in surprise, before looking disgusted. She had passed out. He leaned down and zipped himself back up before pushing her against the other wall. He stared at her for a second, contemplating whether to be nice and drag her to a couch, or be cruel and leave her there.

Jou didn't look back as he shut the door to the bathroom with the girl still in there.

He was angered. He was just about to get a blow-job and the girl had to go and pass out on him. In a desparate move, he kicked the nearest wall before storming to get his bag. He needed his liquor. He was caught on the hand once more, and spun quickly to see who is was.

He didn't recognize this person. But he was male, and obviously went to his school with the clothes he was wearing. The guy grinned and brought a bag up to Jou's face; it appeared to have some white powder in it. Jou stared, knowing exactly what it was. But the question was whether he wanted to do it. The only thing he could think of was, 'Why not?'

Jou nodded and was dragged upstairs, but not before he grabbed his bag.

He was roughly pushed against the wall by the other guy, and forced to sit down. The guy brought a plate over and made a two lines with the powder he had just poured on it. Jou stared at the plate, not sure what exactly the outcome of doing this would be.

The guy grinned. "I'll give you this, only if you let me take care of that," he said and pointed at Jou's crotch.

Jou looked shocked. He had never been propositioned to by a guy before. Sure he'd had numerous amounts of blow-jobs from girls; hell, he'd even had sex plenty with them, but never with guys. The same voice he had been hearing since earlier spoke up once more. 'Why not?'

Jou shrugged, and the guy smirked. Jou reached to his bag and brought out a new bottle of liquor. The guy reached in his pocket and produced a dollar bill, rolling it into a small tube. He handed it to Jou and brought the plate up to him.

Jou stared at the plate, then glanced at the rolled-up dollar. He had never done hard drugs before. He blinked slowly. 'Course he had also never gotten a blow-job from a guy before. 'You've never killed anyone before, either. What's keeping you from doing this?'

Jou nodded to himself, confusing the boy in front of him. He placed the tube to one of his nostrils, holding a finger to the open one, and leaned in. He breathed in the line and leaned back. His nose was burning. Jou could hear the other guy snort his line, and lean towards Jou. Jou felt his pants being un-buttoned and his boxers pulled down. His member was free, and suddenly covered by the boy's mouth.

Jou yelped in surprise. He closed his eyes, concentrating on the feeling, but felt his pupils start to dialate. His head was warming up and could feel sweat starting to come to the surface. The guy in front of him working hard at him, scraping his teeth along him. Jou cried out.

'What's going on?' he asked himself, squeezing his eyes tighter. What happened when you took cocaine? If he could remember correctly, one's senses are heightened, energy is increased. Along with this blow-job it was mind-numbing. He felt everything, could see everything. Suddenly his world flashed white, and he cried out.

The boy in front of him sat up, wiping his mouth. Jou lay in front of him; hands gripping the floor, legs bent, eyes closed. The boy smiled; obviously this was a first-time user. He had taken it pretty well, too. He leaned close to Jou, taking his chin in his fingers. Jou looked to him, pupils dialated.

The guy leaned in and kissed Jou briefly, before pulling back and walking to Jou's bag. He placed the bag of cocaine in his bag, with about an ounce left in it. It was a lot to give away, he knew, but he thought this kid deserved it.

One last glance at Jou, and the kid was gone. Jou sighed. He didn't feel tired at all. Although he did feel slightly dirty, he was aware of the fact that he had allowed it, and he liked it. It was, in fact, probably the best blow-job he had ever recieved. He reached for his liquor and took a long swig, then closed his eyes, enjoying the way it burned his throat.

He looked down and noticed that "everthing" was still hanging out. He reached and tucked himself back in before scooching up on the wall and taking another drink. Maybe the alcohol would calm him down, for he felt like he could be awake forever. He took another drink. And another. Until he realized he was practically sucking on the thing like a bottle. He finished it off and reached for the other bottle in his bag. Suddenly his hand started shaking and he turned on his side, his eyes bugging out. At one moment, it felt as if his heart was racing a mile a minute, but a second later it was slow and steady.

Jou's heart kept fluxuating, and it scared him.

'What's going on?' Jou's eyes widened again. It felt as if his body wasn't sure whether to slow down or speed up, so it finally just said ... fuck you.

-_-_-

JI: Review! ^_^ Thanks to Jokid, Dark Nation (love ya babe), Blue Lagoon Loon, Blondchick14 and Firedea You guys are awesome! ^__^

Betty: *blush* Goodness…