Disclaimer: I hold no responsibility to any of the Harry Potter characters.
JK Rowling is the rightful copyrighted owner of all Harry Potter
characters and all things mentioned in her book, this is simply a ff
created in my imagination.
Warning: May be a bit inappropriate.
Harry arrived at his house and found the door unlocked. He shoved the cans of beer on the doorway aside and finally got through all his obstacles of junks. He got to his bedroom to find Ron on his sofa watching TV.
"Hey, Harry, glad you're back. I just came in since your door was unfastened. Thought I explore a bit, you don't mind, right?"
"Err."
"Of course you don't. Is this what you call a tel-lee-vive-sion. I sat on this complicated muggle device with so much buttons and then this tel-lee- vive-sion just turned on. It's interesting how muggles could make sounds and pictures come out of this thing without using magic, must took years for them to build this thing. What do they call this sport? It's interesting of how they kick the ball back and forth into that big fishing net, is that what you call it? It's actually pretty exciting! SCORE!!! Oh, and I found this funny small package thing under your sofa. It's quite interesting, "Trojan", "extra large to better fit your size", what they're selling extra large fries in these things now? And what in the world is good lubrication? And why did you mark "first experience" on this thing? I guess this is what muggles call candy, eh? Could I have it?"
"Ron! NO!" Harry shouted and grabbed the little package he kept so dearly.
Ron smiled slyly. "Don't you think I know what this is? My dad brought one of these home before from the Muggle's Department. He handed it to Percy and said it would useful for Penelope and him on their wedding night. So Fred, George, and I did an experiment on it. We poked tons of holes on it! You should of seen Penelope's face when she found out she was bearing a little Weasley in her stomach. She swear she'll never use this sort of muggle stuff again." With this, Ron rolled on the floor, laughing. He wiped his tears away and saw that Harry had no reaction.
"What's wrong, mate? Not happy that I found out you've never done it before? That you're a Vir-gin" Ron pronounced "Virgin" carefully.
"Shut up! Ron!"
"What are you waiting for? Or rather who?" Ron said, catching his eyes on on eof the photos framed nicely by Harry's bedside. It was a picture of CHo taken by Colin Creevy on her graduation. In the picture, Cho turned around in astonishment and smiled a nervous, but cute smile. Her hair was kind of flying from being blown by the summer wind.
Harry blushed when he saw what Ron was looking at, "need I explain more?"
"Clear as the sky." Ron laughed. He held on his stomach from the pain of laughing too hard. "Does she know you like, excuse me, loveeeee, her?"
"No, but."
"But what? You think she doesn't like you and blah blah blah. Time is ticking and it is not going to wait for anyone, I tell you. She's pretty, intelligent, and not to mention she's got this magnificent body! People are probably chasing her with their tongues dragging on the ground."
"I know."
"It's time I go home, Hermione and the kids are waiting for me." With that, Ron put on his shoes and was beginning to walk out of the door when Harry spoke, "Ron, thanks."
"For what?"
"For being there. You wouldn't come here just to make some jokes and tell me all these things and leave, would you?"
Ron was silent.
"Thanks for reminding me of what's important." Harry continued.
"I told you what I needed to. Carpe diem, Harry." He walked out of the door and came back in, "I suggest you to use that condom of yours soon, it expires next month."
Harry blushed and answered, "Right." He sat down quietly to fantasize about Cho. Ron closed the door and stared at the thundering sky, "I'm afraid, something unpleasant is going to happen."
Warning: May be a bit inappropriate.
Harry arrived at his house and found the door unlocked. He shoved the cans of beer on the doorway aside and finally got through all his obstacles of junks. He got to his bedroom to find Ron on his sofa watching TV.
"Hey, Harry, glad you're back. I just came in since your door was unfastened. Thought I explore a bit, you don't mind, right?"
"Err."
"Of course you don't. Is this what you call a tel-lee-vive-sion. I sat on this complicated muggle device with so much buttons and then this tel-lee- vive-sion just turned on. It's interesting how muggles could make sounds and pictures come out of this thing without using magic, must took years for them to build this thing. What do they call this sport? It's interesting of how they kick the ball back and forth into that big fishing net, is that what you call it? It's actually pretty exciting! SCORE!!! Oh, and I found this funny small package thing under your sofa. It's quite interesting, "Trojan", "extra large to better fit your size", what they're selling extra large fries in these things now? And what in the world is good lubrication? And why did you mark "first experience" on this thing? I guess this is what muggles call candy, eh? Could I have it?"
"Ron! NO!" Harry shouted and grabbed the little package he kept so dearly.
Ron smiled slyly. "Don't you think I know what this is? My dad brought one of these home before from the Muggle's Department. He handed it to Percy and said it would useful for Penelope and him on their wedding night. So Fred, George, and I did an experiment on it. We poked tons of holes on it! You should of seen Penelope's face when she found out she was bearing a little Weasley in her stomach. She swear she'll never use this sort of muggle stuff again." With this, Ron rolled on the floor, laughing. He wiped his tears away and saw that Harry had no reaction.
"What's wrong, mate? Not happy that I found out you've never done it before? That you're a Vir-gin" Ron pronounced "Virgin" carefully.
"Shut up! Ron!"
"What are you waiting for? Or rather who?" Ron said, catching his eyes on on eof the photos framed nicely by Harry's bedside. It was a picture of CHo taken by Colin Creevy on her graduation. In the picture, Cho turned around in astonishment and smiled a nervous, but cute smile. Her hair was kind of flying from being blown by the summer wind.
Harry blushed when he saw what Ron was looking at, "need I explain more?"
"Clear as the sky." Ron laughed. He held on his stomach from the pain of laughing too hard. "Does she know you like, excuse me, loveeeee, her?"
"No, but."
"But what? You think she doesn't like you and blah blah blah. Time is ticking and it is not going to wait for anyone, I tell you. She's pretty, intelligent, and not to mention she's got this magnificent body! People are probably chasing her with their tongues dragging on the ground."
"I know."
"It's time I go home, Hermione and the kids are waiting for me." With that, Ron put on his shoes and was beginning to walk out of the door when Harry spoke, "Ron, thanks."
"For what?"
"For being there. You wouldn't come here just to make some jokes and tell me all these things and leave, would you?"
Ron was silent.
"Thanks for reminding me of what's important." Harry continued.
"I told you what I needed to. Carpe diem, Harry." He walked out of the door and came back in, "I suggest you to use that condom of yours soon, it expires next month."
Harry blushed and answered, "Right." He sat down quietly to fantasize about Cho. Ron closed the door and stared at the thundering sky, "I'm afraid, something unpleasant is going to happen."