What Is This New Devilry?
CHAPTER 1
DISCLAIMER: I own absolutely nothing. But LOTR is on my birthday list, since I didn't get that, Legolas, or the one ring for Christmas.
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"Why do we have do have Science class anyway? Does anyone even pay attention?" Kelsey asked her friend Hailey.
"No." Hailey said, considering that half the class was asleep, and the rest were listening to their discmans.
"We're in Science? I thought it was math." GT asked Hailey.
"Ya, we're in Science." Hailey answered.
"Then what was last period?" GT asked.
"Math. But you wouldn't know, you and Kelsey were making up the nitro glycerin song." Hailey answered, rolling her eyes.
"Oh ya. That was fun." GT recalled.
"Kelsey, will you please come up and demonstrate what I just explained by pouring the chemicals together?" Their teacher asked.
"Okaaay." Kelsey said, walking up and pouring the blue chemical into the white one.
"You poured the wrong one into it!" Their teacher yelled as the mixture began to fiz.
Kelsey didn't answer, as she had dove back under her desk with GT and Hailey.
The chemicals exploded, engulfing the room in blue smoke.
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Kelsey opened her eyes and saw...dirt. Lots of it. She also saw several pairs of feet, wearing weird shoes.
"Damn it, where the hell am I?" She asked. The feet all stopped, and she felt something sharp touch her back.
Kelsey rolled over and saw that she was surrounded by orcs, all of which were pointing swords at her.
"Oh, well isn't this just greeeeeaat?" She asked sarcastically, as the orcs charged at her.
She rolled to the side and grabbed a sword which just happened to be lying there. (A/N So convenient eh?) She swung upwards and slashed the orc through the chest.
"Coooooool..." She said as the orc fell at her feet.
She, of course, in all her great brilliance had stopped paying attention to all the other orcs that were now rushing at her.
One of the orcs swung at her and cut her arm.
"Ow!! What the hell was that for you jackass?!!!" She yelled, killing him and several other orcs in a fit of extreme rage, which could have been induced by PMS. (A/N It's a good excuse most of the time.)
The remaining seven orcs closed in on her. One knocked the sword out of her hand.
"Oh shit." She muttered. "Umm...Okay, time to put the Matrix to good use."
She started kicking and punching the orcs, and all of them fell eventually.
"HA!!! TAKE THAT!!!!!" She yelled to no one in particular. "Hey, where'd Hailey and GT go?"
She heard someone walk up behind her. 'Geez, how many of them are there?' She thought. The footsteps stopped right behind her, and she threw her fist back into whatever was behind her. She wheeled around, fists up, to see what she had punched.
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Hailey landed on the branch of a tree. "Where am I?" She asked aloud, looking down. She fell off the branch, hitting every other branch of the tree, cursing all the way down, before she landed on the ground, with her hair over her face.
"I'll say, I've never heard such foul language!" Said a voice behind her.
"HOLY SWEET JESUS!!!!" Hailey yelled as she wheeled around.
"I repeat my previous statement!" Aragorn said in shock, staring at the short female who had just fallen at his feet.
"Where the hell am I?!" Hailey yelled.
"Outside of Bree." Aragorn answered.
"I'm in Middle Earth?" Hailey screeched.
"Yes." Aragorn said.
"Cool!!!" Hailey yelled. "Where are we going?"
"Who said you were coming with us?" Aragorn asked.
"I did!" Hailey answered cheerfully. "Wait, did you say us?"
"Yes I did." Aragorn answered. "I'm on my way to Rivendell with four hobbits."
"Mr. Strider?" Asked Sam, coming up behind Aragorn.
"DWA!!! Evil short person!!" Hailey yelled, pointing at Sam.
"What is it Sam?" Aragorn asked, ignoring Hailey, who was screaming as loud as she could in terror.
"Who is she?" Sam asked.
"I do not know." Aragorn replied. He raised his voice to yell over Hailey's screams. "Who are you and where are you from?"
"My name is Hailey, and I'm from Canada. Oh wait, you don't know where that is. Umm...Let's just say I'm not from here okay?" Hailey answered.
"I see. Why are you following us?" Aragorn asked.
"I don't know. I was in Science class, paying no attention and talking to my friends when Kelsey messed up on an experiment with chemicals and then she almost blew up our classroom and I ended up here and- Hey! Where are GT and Kelsey anyway?" She asked.
"I do not know who you are talking about." Aragorn told her. "And why are you here?"
"I guess I got sent here when the chemicals exploded." Hailey told him, shrugging.
"What are chemicals?" Aragorn asked.
"Stuff that does bad things when you don't put them together right." Hailey attempted to explain.
"Right. So, be on your way then." Aragorn told her.
"No way! I don;t know where I am. Oh wait, yes I do. The MIDDLE OF NO WHERE!!!!!!!" Hailey yelled.
Aragorn rolled his eyes and walked away. Hailey followed.
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GT landed in a bush. "OW!!!!" She yelled, followed by several profanities I'm not sure if I'm allowed to write down in a PG 13 fic.
"Who are you and what are you doing here?" Asked a voice from outside of the bush.
"I have no *censored* clue you *censored*." GT answered standing up.
"And why do you use such foul language?" Asked Boromir.
"AAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" GT yelled so loudly that birds flew out of the nearby trees.
"What?" Boromir asked.
"Not. Him. Not Him. Not Him." GT repeated over and over again, banging her head against a tree with each word.
"I'm sorry, do I know you?" Boromir asked.
"No. But I know that you're the biggest scumbag ever to walk Middle Earth." GT shot back, still banging her head against the tree trunk.
"What did you call me?" Boromir asked in disbelief.
"A scumbag! And I could come up with a thousand other words too!" GT yelled. She was still smacking her head against the tree trunk.
"Where did you come from?" Boromir asked.
"Living hell." GT muttered. "I came from another world okay?"
"Okay, and why are you following me to Rivendell?"
"I'm not following you, I landed in the bush five minutes ago!" GT yelled back. "Wait, did you say Rivendell?"
"Yes I did."
"Then I'm following you so I can go to Rivendell to see the elves, because if I didn't follow someone, I'd end up hopelessly lost." GT replied.
"Fine then." Boromir said, walking away.
GT followed him. "Elves. Think about the elves." She told herself in an attempt to keep her sanity. Oh wait, that had gone away when she was three.
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Okay, how was it? Reviews good. Flames bad. Get picture? Goooood, I have trained u well. ^_^