My first FFX fic. ^_^ I actually started this like...six months ago when I finished the game, and I finally decided to finish it. It's just a little reflection kinda dealie from Auron's POV. Enjoy and let me know what you think. ^^

Warnings: Um...a little yaoi fluffiness, and that's about it. Oh, and I used the word...*glances around furtively* *whispers* Sex. ^_^v

Disclaimer: His lovely Auron-ness is, so sadly, not mine. Neither is Jecht, Braska, or anything else FFX related. I'm not making any money from this little endeavor, it's just a bit of harmless fun. I promise to put them back when I'm done playing. ^^


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Bare feet.

That was one thing that always completely baffled me about you, lover. Why in the name of Yevon did you always run around barefoot? So impractical. I remember every so often you would step on something sharp, or stub your toe on a rock. I would just shake my head as you limped by me, and say something about shoes. Then you would just flash me a grin and tell me that a little pain was worth it as long as you didn't have to wear those "goddamned things." Impractical. Then again, you were hardly the practical sort. It was one of your more endearing qualities.

In fact, you were impracticality personified. I think you reveled in it. How heads would turn and people would stare, curious, at the brash man in the strange clothes. And of course, bare feet. You were always so different than I, and maybe that's what attracted me. You had...this amazing presence that simply could not be ignored.

Such an attention hound. You caused Braska and I no end of trouble. But, it was always fun trouble. Even the Shoopuff. Especially the Shoopuff. You were the biggest problem of the whole pilgrimage, and at the same time, its saving grace. Because with you, there was always laughter. You always kept our spirits high. I don't know how Braska would have managed without you. I don't know how I ever lived without you.

You always used to poke fun at me, to tease me about being too stiff. Anything to get a rise out of me. Irritated the hell out of me, but somehow, in the end, I always wound up smiling. You were good at that. Making me smile and irritating the hell out of me.

By the time I realized that I was falling in love with you I was too far gone to do anything about it. I never really suspected that what I felt could be love. We were both men, after all, and I never thought I had any interest in them. Not until Braska took me aside one day.

I remember sitting with him, watching you chatter away with one of the inn's other patrons. He looked at me for a moment, a thoughtful expression on his face.

"You should talk to him, Auron."

I glanced at him, "Why? Jecht seems perfectly happy with the company he has."

Braska smiled and shook his head. "That's not what I meant.

"Then what did you mean?"

"Tell him how you feel."

"About what?"

He smiled at me, "I never really thought you were a man who would hide from his own feelings."

"What are you talking about?"

"When you look at Jecht, what do you see?"

Not quite sure what to make of the question, I looked over at Jecht just in time to see him lean back in his chair, clutching his stomach and laughing uproariously at something his companion had said. Unfortunately, in his mirth, he tipped his chair too far and fell backwards, foot catching the small table and upending it on the other man.

I chuckled and looked back at Braska. "Should I really answer that?"

Braska was grinning, and he shrugged. "Perhaps not. I don't think it was the right question anyway. I suppose I should have asked, when you look at Jecht, what do you feel?"

I frowned, not sure what Braska was getting at, and looked back over at Jecht. He was still lying in a heap on the floor, laughing even harder at his mishap. "I'm...not quite sure," I said, for the first time truly noticing the strange tightening in my chest when I looked at him. "Off balance maybe?"

Braska nodded. "What else?"

"What's the point of this, anyway?"

"I'm trying to help a friend who refuses to help himself."

"What?"

Braska sighed, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. "I see subtlety isn't going to work this time. Do you know what I see when you're around him Auron?"

"What?"

"A man in love."

The implications of those words hit hard, but they were true. You were irresponsible, irritating, a drunk and a pest, and I...was madly in love with you. Braska said that if I didn't talk to you, he was going to tie me up and leave me behind. I believed him. So that night, I went to your room. I was scared as hell, not that I'd ever admit it, but it was as if being aware of my feelings intensified them a hundredfold.

I knocked on the door to Jecht's room, half hoping he wouldn't answer. Unfortunately, I heard movement within, and few moments later the door cracked open and Jecht poked his head out, irritated. "What the hell do you want, knocking on my door in the middle of the goddamned...Auron?" He stared at me for a second. "What's wrong?"

"There's nothing wrong Jecht. It's not that important, it can wait. Sorry to wake you." I turned to go, stilling when he touched my shoulder.

"Nah. Don't worry about it." I turned back around as he held the door open. "Come on in."

I stepped inside and he closed the door behind me. He leaned back against the door, regarding me curiously. "What's up?"

Not sure how to broach the subject, I simply returned his scrutiny for a moment, wondering idly why it had taken Braska to make me realize how I felt. "Braska feels that there is something I should tell you.

"Eh? Does he now?" Jecht pushed away from the door and closed the distance between us. "So, what is it?"

"I..." I sighed, staring at the floor and wishing fervently that I was anywhere else. "You're irritating and lazy. You're irrational, and you're a drunk and a pest, and you cause property damage on a regular basis and I..." I trailed off. I was going about things all wrong, and I simply could not seem to say it.

Risking a glance up, I saw Jecht watching me with an eyebrow raised and a smile on his lips. Well, at least one of us was enjoying this sorry scene. I took a deep breath and tried again. "I..."

I never got any further, because he chose that moment to kiss me.

I hated how you could always get me so damned flustered. I don't get flustered, but somehow you always managed. Though, I think it almost made up for it when you told me, some days later, that you had fully expected me to punch you square in the jaw, not kiss you back. I can only imagine your surprise when it went so much further than a simple kiss. It was strange, really, I had never had sex with a man before, and yet being with you seemed like the most natural thing. I don't think I'll ever forget the look on Braska's face when he walked in the next morning and found us in bed together. I don't think he was expecting things to go that far so quickly. Of course, neither was I. I wasn't expecting it to go anywhere at all.

After that, things were wonderful. Aside from of all those times Braska managed to find us in some compromising position or another. But somehow I managed to fall in love with you all over again every time you did something stupid. I questioned the sanity of my feelings on more than one occasion.

Then, suddenly, I lost you. It was over, and you were gone. I don't know how I survived in those years after. I realized then that my soul was so completely entwined with yours that when I lost you, I lost myself. So often I just wanted to give up. But I couldn't. I made a promise to you, and I could not break it.

I kept that promise. It's over Jecht, the tale has come to its close. And now, now I can leave knowing that I have done what I set out to do. We're free from the chains that bound us here, and now, after so long, we can be together again. I love you Jecht.

And you'd damn well better be waiting for me when I get there.