Betrayal

Part 1~If She Only Knew

I was going to have this be based on something that really happened to someone I know, but my conscience wouldn't allow me to write something about someone who's no longer alive. So I don't think it will be. But please don't kill me over the plot…you have no idea how hard it is for me to write this plot line, lol. The parts in italics are flashbacks. And same as always, I don't own the characters, never have. But I will. Someday, I will…

Chandler rolled over, trying to catch his breath, a rush of guilt flooding over him. Just like it always did. Every time. And he had no idea why he kept doing it. He had everything to lose if everyone found out. He had a wife, two kids.

She had nothing to lose. She also was married, had a baby. But she also had a reputation for this. His marriage was falling apart, she became his confidant, one thing led to another, and human nature took over.

Her intent, his mistake.

Yet another affair for her, his only regret.

"You okay? You're awful quiet today…"

"Yeah, I-just thinking," Chandler mumbled, moving to get up. "I should get going."

"Stay?" she pleaded, but he ignored her, grabbing his clothes that were strewn across the floor, pulling them on in a hurry.

"It's almost five, Jess, I gotta get home," he grabbed his tie, which had been thrown over a chair. "And Mark will be home soon," he looked up at her, the awkward silence that always seemed to take over right before Chandler left following. He always almost kissed her, almost automatically, but his conscience would suddenly take over and he couldn't. "See you tomorrow," he said quietly, giving her one last glance as she started to get dressed.

"Bye," Jessi replied, watching as he walked out the door, his head hung in shame, and she knew that if he turned around, there'd be no mistaking the look of guilt on his face.

Chandler unlocked his car, pausing for a moment after he got in, shivering from the chill in the late-autumn wind.

Or maybe the shiver wasn't from the cold.

Chandler just sighed, starting the car as he glanced at the clock, trying to decide which excuse he'd give to Monica when he got home. But just at the thought of Monica, he started to crumble. Sure, it hadn't been going all that great-hell, it'd been horrible between them lately-but he still didn't see that as a reason, as an excuse, to cheat.

And yet he was.

Looking up at the red traffic light, he once again sighed, turning the radio up louder in hopes that it would drown out his thoughts.

"So you just took it. Just like that," Monica crossed her arms.

"Mon-"

"No! You just…took it. What about my job?"

"They have restaurants in Detroit, too…"

"And what about the kids? You want to just uproot them, take them away from their school, their friends?"

"There's schools in Detroit... They'll make new friends."

"Damnit, Chandler, that's not event the point! You didn't even talk to me about it!"

" Well that's only because I thought there'd be no way you could have any objections to it! I-"

"I, I, I."

"Yes, I, I, I," Chandler looked her in the eye, "For once in my life I was being the selfish one!"

Monica let out a huffy breath. "Don't even-"

"Don't even what, Monica?" he asked rhetorically. "Am I not right? Does everything not always have to be Monica's way? Well, for once in my life I wanted it to be my way!"

"You know you sound about 16?"

Chandler sighed, sitting down on the couch. "What do you want me to do? I already said yes."

"I know," Monica lowered her eyes. "Can you get out of it?"

"I don't know," Chandler stood back up, turning to face her. "And I don't know if I want-"

"I didn't ask what you want, Chandler, I asked if you could."

"I could try," he finally said. "But do you realize that I've never really liked what I've done? I could do this and I could be good at this."

"Well, I'm not going," Monica crossed her arms.

"What?"

"Do what you have to do, but I'm not going."

"Mon…"

"Don't 'Mon' me, I'm mad at you," she snapped, turning her back to him. Closing her eyes, she tried to think of what to say. "We've done this before…take the job, live in Michigan, come home on the weekends…"

Chandler sighed, taking a step toward her. "But it was good then," he almost whispered, not wanting to admit out loud what everyone already knew. "I-I don't think we'd make it."

Monica turned to face him, knowing very well that he was right. "Then there you go. Make your decision. You job or your family."

"Mon, that's not fair."

"Well, life's a bitch, Chandler," Monica turned to leave the room. "And the man I married wouldn't have had to give that decision a second thought."

Chandler closed his eyes, sinking back into the couch. She was right. 15 years before, he wouldn't have given it a second thought. But right now, he couldn't even remember a time when he was happy, when everything was still good.

"Dad."

Chandler's eyes popped open, turning around to see his nine-year-old daughter standing at the top of the stairs. "Go back to bed, Megs," he said softly, but she ignored it, coming down the stairs. She walked over to where he was, sitting on the couch next to him and wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug.

"Don't leave," she whispered, holding back tears. "Please don't leave."

Chandler held her. His mind had already been made up the second that he saw her standing there.

"Never, baby," he kissed her hair, "Never."

Chandler turned into their driveway, swallowing his guilt as he took the keys out of the ignition before opening his door.

Here it goes. Another set of lies. Another night of pretending.

"Hey," he was greeted by Monica, who was standing in the kitchen when he walked in.

"Hey," he replied, giving her a quick kiss on the lips.

"How was your day?" she asked, turning back to what she was cooking on the stove.

Chandler just looked at her back. It was much easier to lie to her when she wasn't face to face with him. And she could always tell…She said his eyes gave him away. But lately, he'd gotten better. Or maybe she'd stopped caring. You only hear what you want to hear, see what you want to see.

"Fine," he replied at last, only one thought going through his mind when he said it.

If she only knew.

To

Be

Continued…

Please review…I really wanna know what you people think of this one. And you have no idea how hard it is for me to make my Chandler the bad guy…LOL…so please let me know what you think…