Part 12: Three Men, Three Loves

I really have to break this habit of forgetting that I'm a joined woman. Honestly, being around him makes me forget about everything, and even a fool knows that this is not healthy. But if he's not my real husband, there's no real reason why I should stay here, is there?

It's funny how things turn out. Only a few hours ago, I would have done absolutely anything Hunsa wanted, but now? I can't wait to get away from him. He lied to me, he deceived me, how dare he? Making me believe that I was his wife, an unloved wife to add to the matter.

"He lied to me. As far as I'm concerned, he's a jerk."

The man smiles sadly, "Of course there's the people of Cayan. I don't think you'll leave them now, especially when the Goa'uld attack is only six days from now."

Yup, it's official, hanging around him definitely is not healthy. I sigh a heavy sigh, he was right. How can he know me so well, even better than I know myself? And he ... wait, what was his name? I can't believe it, I'm having a conversation with this man for hours and I don't even know his name.

"What's your name?" I shyly ask.

He's startled at first but then he grins, "Jack, call me Jack."

I can't help but be infected by his grin, "Okay Jack, if you really want me to go home with you, why did you bring these things up?"

Jack reaches my hand and holds it tightly, staring straight into my eyes, "Because I don't want you to regret this, I know you. You want to help these people, that's why I'm willing to wait until the Goa'uld attack is over before taking you home."

"Why do we have to wait for the Goa'uld attack?"

"I have someone who can help us, but he asked for some conditions. One of them is that we're not leaving Cayan before the attack. They might need you if they have trouble with the shield."

That's right, the Tamen might have some fault after I fixed it. No one has the knowledge on how to make these things work but me. A very logical request.

"Six days," I whisper.

He nods, "Six days and then we'll say goodbye to this planet."

Six days and all the lies are over. Six days and I'm home. Six days and I'll get what was taken away from me back.

"It's going to be a very long six days." I mutter.

His hand is still grasped around mine, he drags me, "Come."

"Where?" I follow behind him. He takes us out of the glass house, the rain has stopped and the dusk has approached.

"There's no way I'm going to let you go back to him. You'll spend the next six days with me."

I let out a smile, somehow the six days don't seem so dreadful now.

***

Ba'ek was surprised when Jack came back to his place with Major Carter. He had expected that the Major would not be so easily persuaded, but Jack had proven him wrong.

"B, look who I got with me." Jack cheerfully greeted him, closing the door as soon as the two of them entered the simple but comfortable place. There was a sofa in the corner of the place, a wooden table placed right in front of it and a shelf full of books. The room was showed by a soft yellowish light produced by the light bulb.

"Ba'ek," Major Carter was shocked when she saw him, he could tell from her reaction. He and Kisa were best friends after all, she would not expect him to do the things that he did to her.

"Major Carter," Ba'ek tried to remain calm, although the thought that he took part in the 'Havus' did not make him comfortable around her.

"He's one of the Grands," the Major gritted her teeth, clearly angered by his presence.

Jack put a hand on her shoulder, "I know. He made a mistake Carter and now he wants to make up for it by helping us get out of here. It's okay, we can trust him."

She looked at him and Ba'ek could see an understanding was passed though the silence. He could see how she trusted him although no further words were exchanged.

"Major Carter, I am sorry for what I have done to you. But it is done and regretfully I don't have the power to change the past. All I can do now is help you come back home."

She didn't say anything. How Ba'ek wished he could read her mind right now, but the 'Havus' had somehow changed her brain chemistry and made her immune to the Grands' mind-reading ability. Finally, she opened her mouth, "Why do you want to help us?"

"Because I believe it is the right thing to do."

She frowned, "I know you, or at least my memory knows you. There's something you're not telling me."

"Carter?" Jack asked as if he needed assurance.

She turned to face him, "I can't explain it, but he's hiding something. I'm quite sure."

Ba'ek stood and watched them intently, he owed them, "Major Carter is right. There is something more."

Jack shot an angry glare towards him, "And what would that be?"

Ba'ek realised that Jack hated secrets, he needed to know every detail. So, he would tell them everything.

"I will show you."

He walked towards the room, where she was.

***

The room was not too big and was not too small either; it had a bed in the middle of it and was occupied by a woman, and several tubes linked her to a machine next to her bed. Jack couldn't help but notice how pale she looked. She had silky long black hair, and her eyes were closed. Jack was no doctor, but he could see that she had no physical injuries. Before he could say anything, he could feel Sam put her arms around his right arm and hold it close. She was shaking.

"Carter, you alright?" he gently touched her.

She was still shaking, and whispered, "Oh my God. That's me, that's me ..." her eyes were moist as the tears threatened to fall.

"Major Carter is correct, this is Kisa." Ba'ek said carefully, fully aware that Sam had that woman's memory inside her brain.

Jack moved his arms from her grip so that he could hold her, "Shhh ... Carter. It's alright, it's not you." He chanted to her ears and caressed the back of her head, trying to calm her down, her face buried in his chest. Jack could feel her anger rising, Hell, he could feel his anger increasing as well.

"Who the Hell do they think they are?" she cried out, "Who just the Hell do they think they are?"

"Carter ... shhh ... it's alright. I'm here ... I'm here." Jack tried to soothe her anguish.

She lifted her head and faced him, "What did I do to deserve this? Tell me, what did I do?" tears were streaming down her cheeks.

He put his hands on her face and ran his thumbs to shed the tears, "It's not your fault. Jesus, it's not your fault. Do not think for even a second that it was your fault." Once again he pulled her into his embrace, offering her comfort in the only way that he could. Jack lead her out of the room, knowing that the sight of the woman on the bed was upsetting her a lot.

She cried herself to sleep. Jack slowly lay her down on the sofa and let her rest. He watched her sleeping face and wondered, was it her Major that was so upset or was it the Cayan's woman? Carter was stronger than that, he expected the anger, but he didn't anticipate the outburst. The memory stamp did change her to certain extent. He was afraid of that, what if the change is permanent? She wouldn't be the Carter that he once knew. Could he still have feelings towards her? Could she still feel the same way about him?

He let his hand run though her hair and played with it. He noticed that it had grown a little, making her more feminine, more vulnerable, more fragile, more ... different. He got lost in his thoughts. She didn't deserve this. She's been though a lot, she deserved his faith now, more than ever. He would not let her go through this alone, not while he's still breathing.

Jack could hear the door opening, and he turned around to see Ba'ek come out from the room. Ba'ek looked at the man, "I apologize. I should have informed you about what was inside the room."

Jack wanted to shout, he wanted to hit him for making Sam so upset, but the look on Ba'ek's face stopped him dead in his tracks. There was pain and regret so deep that it reminded him of himself when he found his son was killed by his own gun.

"You love her." it was not an accusation, but Ba'ek lowered his head in shame.

"She was the most incredible person I have ever known." Ba'ek confessed.

"You love her." Jack pressed.

Ba'ek shakes his head, "What do you want me to say?"

"The real reason why you wanted to help us."

Ba'ek turned to face the door of the room, "Because I did something dreadful and now I am living with the consequences."

"What consequences? Watching the one you love slip away because of some politic game?"

"No."

"Then what?"

"I could of prevented this from happening, but I let my fears blind me." Jack could only see his back as Ba'ek's eyes were still fixed on the door.

Jack returned his gaze to the woman sleeping next to him, he knew what Ba'ek was talking about, "And the guilt is eating you alive day by day."

"Yes, watching Major Carter everyday reminds me of my failure. She is Kisa, but she's not."

Jack touched her face. She is Carter, but she's not.

The two men had their backs facing each other, but they understood each other more than anyone could imagine.

"What's going to happen to her?" Jack asked.

"To Kisa?"

"Yeah."

"I do not know. The 'Havus' was highly forbidden, we have not practiced it in decades."

"Why are you the one who gets to keep her body? Isn't Hunsa her husband?"

Ba'ek lets out a cynical chuckle, their backs still facing each other, "Hunsa is a man of honour. He chose his partner based on how she could contribute to our people."

"You mean he doesn't care about her?"

"He cares about her, only when she can perform her duty."

"What about her?"

Ba'ek swallowed a nervous gulp, "She ... she loves him."

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Do you love her?"

"I care a great deal about her. But love her? I do not know. I honestly do not know."

"To me, you sound like you do."

Ba'ek didn't answer straight away, "Yes, I might."

"Good for you."

"Are you trying to mock me, Jack?"

"No, I really think it's good for you."

"How can you say that? She doesn't love me back." Ba'ek's voice was harsh.

"It doesn't matter."

"It doesn't?"

"Yeah."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because when you love someone, she brings the best out in you. Isn't that the real reason why you helped us? Because you love her?"

Jack adverted his eyes to Ba'ek's back, he was still staring at the door, no doubt thinking about the woman inside it. Jack waited patiently for the other man's answer.

"Yes, she does." Jack could've sworn that he could see the smile on Ba'ek's face.

***

Hunsa was worried, Kisa did not come home last night. He searched the glass house – where he had seen her last-- but he only found the book about stars, no sign of her. He asked some other residences of the 'Utama' complex, but no one had seen her as well. She just simply disappeared.

Did it have anything to do with the ship that was in their orbit? Was it her people trying to get her back? Major Carter did believe that her people would do anything to get to her. But he ignored the warning, the Great Ring was blocked and Earth didn't have the technology to reach Cayan. He clenched his fist, he was sure that Kisa's feelings for him would mean that she would never leave Cayan. So her people might have to use some force to subdue her. He could not allow it. She was important for Cayan, she was the only one who could fix the Tamen. She was an invaluable asset to Cayan.

"Guard," he called one of the men standing outside his office. The man left his post and approached him.

"Find Kisa! She might have been taken by force. Search the complex and alert the others." He gave the order. The guard didn't need to be told twice, everyone inside the complex knew how important she was to their survival. He bowed his head and complied to Hunsa's order.

***

to be continue

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