Part 15: Tell
The plan is simple. We'll head towards the Great Ring and disable the 'Sumbat', punch in the Earth coordinates on the Ring's Panel - or the DHD as Jack put it - and then say goodbye to Cayan. Ba'ek said that Hunsa had put more Guards on the Tamen's generator. He is convinced that we will escape using the ship, not the Ring. But I can't help but feel cautious. And Jack feels the same too.
Jack has communicated with my Dad again. Dad said that he would hang around in the Cayan's orbit for a while to draw the attention from the Ring. Daniel and Teal'c are already back on Earth, they found another Ring on the planet they were hiding on and decided to use that to get back home. To wait for us there and inform Hammond - the General from Texas - about our situation.
It is simple.
We snuck out from Ba'ek's house very late at night, hoping that the city was asleep and no one would notice me. The Ring is located in an open space, a little bit outside the city. Four buildings - all of them are ruins, but still in good condition - surround it. There was speculation that the Goa'uld used the buildings as their post and for naquada storage during the mining period.
There are six men guarding the Ring, they are laughing and joking in an attempt to stay awake. Several oil lamps are situated near them, providing illuminating light. Jack is checking the area, scanning for unexpected trouble, making sure that there are no more nasty surprises. So, Ba'ek and I are left alone, inside one of the buildings, sitting right under one of the windows, peeking now and again at the Ring.
I can't wait to go home.
There are butterflies in my stomach, nervousness like I never felt before. The glance of the Ring mixes my expectations and fear perfectly, hopes and desperation are fighting against each other inside me.
"Major Carter." Ba'ek whispers.
Carefully, I tear myself from the window, lowering my head slowly and turned around to face him, "Yes."
The sight of him is somehow calming, he was - maybe still is - Kisa's best friend. He looks determined, "I'll get you home. Don't worry."
I reach for his hand and squeeze it, and with all honesty I tell him, "Thank you."
He squeezes back slightly and then he sighs, "I just wish that you didn't have to experience all this in the first place."
He's feeling guilty, for what has happened to me and to Kisa. I pull my hand from him and put it on his shoulder, "I forgive you ... and so does she."
He's smiling sadly, "I don't deserve it."
I sit still for a while, thinking on how I can convince him that he is wrong, "Guilt is one strong feeling, Ba'ek. It is more persistent than hate and more dangerous than terminal disease. It can bring a great man his downfall." I look straight into his blue eyes, praying that he took my words seriously and would think about it. I take his silence as a 'yes' and then continue, "Don't let it win. You're stronger than that."
He is stagnant for a moment and then smiles sincerely, "Thank you."
I draw my hand away from him, "You're welcome. And don't you ever say that you don't deserve it again. Everyone deserves forgiveness, no matter what."
He doesn't say anything, but I know that some of his burden had been lifted from the way he relaxes, "What about Jack?"
This is not how I imagined the conversation to turn out, I turn around and start to peek through the window again. Trying to sound uninterested, I ask him, "What about him?"
"You blame him for something and push him away." I can hear Ba'ek's voice from behind.
"I don't blame him," I tell him the truth.
"But you're pushing him away. That is what Kisa does when she blames someone."
I can't think of anything to say.
Ba'ek continues, "I don't know Major Carter, but please, don't let Kisa's feelings get between you two. Jack does not understand Kisa like I do. He might have said or did something to upset her. Jack is ..." he pauses for a while, "He does not deserve Kisa's anger ... Major Carter and Jack are suffering because of it."
He is right.
'Major Carter and Jack' are suffering. Thanks to me and my self pity and my egotistic nature. I wanted so bad to be part of 'Major Carter and Jack' and when I was refused my desire, I was angered, and Jack was unfortunate enough to be there and received the butt-end of my fury.
What have I done? I was being irrational, childish and cruel.
"Kisa ..." the use of that name made me cringe mentally, "have faith in him."
No matter how much I want to believe that I'm not 'Kisa', the truth still stands, I am her. Just with an additional blur of memories and a different body. Unconsciously my hand clenches tightly and suddenly the ground is more interesting than anything else, "What's wrong with me, Ba'ek? Why wouldn't anyone love me?"
I receive no answer.
Not because he didn't have one, but because several guards are barging inside the building. We can hear the footsteps closing in, they are checking and searching the building. Instinctively, I stand up and hunt for a hiding place with my eyes. There is none. The room we are currently in is pretty bland, unfurnished yet spacious. Ba'ek has already stood up too, and he peers through the door.
"You better go now." he says in an urgent tone.
I look up at the only escape from the room, the window. Not the window facing the Ring, but the other one, the one on the left side of it. There is no other way.
"WE better go now." I caught the back of his collar and drag him slightly away from the door. Before we reach the destination, he shakes himself free.
"No, you go. I will try slowing them down." He insists.
Confused and bewildered, I stare at him, "What?"
He takes both of my hands and says, "I'll try to distract them, you better go and look for Jack ... I wish that the two of you will make it." And with that he spins around and runs out of the room before I can say a thing. I hesitate for a while, I can not just leave him like that, but eventually I approach the window and climb out. Luckily, the room is on the ground floor.
Trying to be as quiet as possible, I creep away from the building. It's a dark and silent night, and the air is warm and humid. I think it's going to rain soon, the thick clouds hide the moon and the stars perfectly. Slowly, I head for the line of trees just between the building and the adjacent one. Spotting the biggest tree around, I make a move to take a cover behind it.
With my back against it, I try to catch my breath. Glancing at the building where I was just a moment ago, I can see that Ba'ek and the guards are coming out from there now. I hope that he could give a believable reason on why he was in there. A clatter from afar draws my attention away from him. I turn and press my front as closely to the tree now as I can, try my best to blend with the environment.
It's Hunsa.
He is standing right in front of the Ring. The Guards are crowded next to him, they are trying to subdue something ... or someone. My heart skips a bit, it can't be. Please, don't let it be him. Don't let it be Jack. My eyes are fixed to the sight before me. The other group of guards approach them, with Ba'ek lagging slightly behind them. Run, I mutter quietly to him. Not that he can hear me, but I still do it. Please Ba'ek, run before Hunsa can see you. If it is really Jack, then Hunsa knows about your willingness to help us.
"Kisa."
Who is that? I was startled; but the voice was soft and gentle, there was no malice in the tone. I spin around to see a familiar figure behind me. It is dark, but the silhouette is enough to let me recognise the person standing right in front of me.
"What do you want?" not wanting to attract unnecessary attention towards our direction, I whisper. I'm in trouble now. Big trouble.
"Let me help you." A hand is offered to me, asking me -- presenting me with a chance. I'm not sure if I want to take it, but I have no choice. However, I need to ask, "Why do you want to help me?"
The hand is still waiting for my acceptance, "Because Ba'ek has let me see the truth." I can't think of a better answer. Casting one last glance at the Ring and the people around it, I find out that my fear has come true. It is Jack. Hunsa has managed to capture him. Damn. Slowly, I turn around and close my eyes.
Calm down! Don't go panicking now! I can do this. Jack and Ba'ek need my help.
When I open my eyes, the sight of the outstretched hand gives me strength. I'm not alone.
I take a step forward and nod briefly, "Lead the way."
The hand is lowered, "Come."
***
"Well, this just ... sucks."
Ba'ek's head rose towards the man that had just spoken. His lips twitched, over the last few days that he had known Jack, he became more and more 'in tune' with Jack's sense of humor. And in some strange way, he was amused by Jack's ability to make him feel better despite their circumstances.
They were in a holding cell. A room with only one door, no windows, no air vents, no nothing. The cemented floor was cold, but they sat on it anyway. Jack in the right corner of the door, no doubt preparing himself for a break out if an opportunity presented itself. Meanwhile, Ba'ek was in the opposite corner. Their backs were against the wall.
Jack sighed dramatically, "I'm hungry. Do you know when they're going to bring our breakfast?" he rubbed his stomach.
Ba'ek was not only amused now, he was curious as well, "How come you are so calm about this?"
Jack just shrugged, "Well B, let's just say that prison and me go way waaaaay back. At least here, they're not going to put a bullet or even a snake in my head. No real reason to be anxious ... yet."
"You are very optimistic."
"I have a good reason for that."
Ba'ek was relieved, "You do?"
"Yeah." Jack answered casually.
"What is it?"
Jack smiled knowingly, "Carter's still out there. She'll figure something out and bust our butts out of here in the speed of light, you won't even feel it."
The Cayan's Grand smiled too. Jack was right. Major Carter was a very resourceful individual, she would be able to get them out of the holding cell.
Ba'ek couldn't help but wonder, what had made Jack and Major Carter so special, so trusting, and so full of faith with each other. Why couldn't he and Kisa be like them? Why couldn't he make Kisa see that there *is* someone who loves her? Someone who would do anything for her in a hearbeat, who would protect her and care for her, who wouldn't take her for granted. Why?
"Jack?"
Jack's head tilted up, "Yeah?"
"How do you make someone know that you love her?"
There was a hint of teasing in Jack's tone, "You could always tell her. That's the simplest one."
Ba'ek chuckled softly in irony, "If only it was that simple."
"Why not?"
Silence encased the room. Ba'ek broke their eye contact and found something to focus on the ceiling, "She belongs to someone else."
Jack didn't buy it for a second, "Well, what about telling her *before* she belongs to someone else."
"She ..." the twinge in his voice was not hard to miss, "she belonged to him long before they were joined. Before I even knew her."
"I don't get that."
"She had always loved him for as long as I could remember. Long before I became aware of my feelings for her."
"So?"
Ba'ek gazed at the other man questioningly. Jack took the hint and explained his remark, "B, whatever the circumstances, you can always tell someone that you love her."
"If I told her, I would trouble her."
"Yes, she would be troubled, but you would be there for her to see her through. I mean, look at me, I'm not allowed to act on my feelings towards Carter, but I still told her ... no matter what the consequences, because she deserved to know. We worked things out. I don't want to have any regrets between us, not when we both could lose each other easily. Travelling the universe on a daily basis doesn't exactly fall into a non-life threatening occupation."
A small smile played on Ba'ek's lips, "You are indeed a wise man."
"Just don't tell anyone, it'll ruin my reputation."
***
The door opened, and Jack was getting ready to take his chance when he heard someone say, "Please go to the end of the room, Colonel." He sighed and then started to walk towards where Ba'ek was seated. The younger man stood up, he knew who was coming. "It's Hunsa," he informed Jack. And then a figure entered the room, followed by several guards.
Hunsa couldn't hide his disgust, and he spat, "Ba'ek, your behaviour was very inappropriate for a Grand."
Jack took a moment to observe the man, this was their first close encounter. He had a presence, a charismatic persona, the 'must have' quality of a great leader. Too bad he had the tendency to look down on other people, that much Jack could gather from him.
"I am only doing what is right." Ba'ek answered icily.
"Right? You are endangering our society." Hunsa snapped.
"Endangering our society? By doing what? I'm only helping these people to go back home." Ba'ek sent a killer glare towards the other Grand. Jack's respect went up several notches, he had never seen Ba'ek so ... *cool*. He wasn't afraid of that Hun-guy.
"You know as well as I do that he can go home, but not Kisa." Hunsa said through gritted teeth.
"She's not Kisa, she's Major Carter. And we don't have the right to keep her here. She belongs with her people." Ba'ek said through gritted teeth, his self-restraint was admirable to say the least.
"Not anymore she doesn't. She's Kisa now, and she is mine."
Jack decided that enough was enough, and he stepped between the two Grands, "Okay Hun-boy, BACK OFF. She doesn't belong to anyone, and she -- believe it or not is not Kisa. Get over it." He made an advancing gesture towards him, ready to connect his right hook to the leader's face when Ba'ek's hand held him back. The guard's reaction was slow, Jack could've beat the crap out of him if Ba'ek hadn't interfered.
"Jack ... let me deal with this." His friend's voice had a cold water effect on Jack's emotions. Jack could see Hunsa's fear in his eyes, he might be a great leader, but violence was not his virtue.
"If you say one more word about her being yours, you're history, do you understand me!" he waved his index finger to the man in front of him. Jack didn't wait for the reply, he stepped back and let Ba'ek do his 'stuff'.
Ba'ek cast his fellow Cayan a glance, "Guards, I ask you to be a witness. I, Ba'ek, the Grand of Cayan, request a Musya."
There were a lot of gasps inside the room.
"A what?" Jack found himself asking Ba'ek for an explanation.
"You can not do that." Hunsa cut Ba'ek off from replying to Jack's question.
Ba'ek ignored him and looked at the guards instead, "You hear me, I am still a Grand after all. Announce it throughout the city, a Musya will be held in the town house by the request of Ba'ek. We will hold it tomorrow, when the sun is rising."
"You CAN NOT do that." Hunsa repeated.
Jack was grinning, whatever the Mushy thingy was, it must be good, "Apparently, he can."
The guards hesitated for a while, but then one of them stepped forwards and bowed, "I will make the announcement." Before Hunsa could say anything, the guard was already hot on his heels.
Hunsa snarled at them, "The Cayans will vote in my favour."
Ba'ek stood his ground, "Then you don't have anything to be worried about. Now, leave us alone. We want to prepare for the Musya."
"Fine. But I want to talk to the Colonel in private." The angry man ordered his guards, "Bring him to my private chamber. Put a restraint on him."
Jack didn't like where this was going. Four brawny guards approached him, ready to use physical force if necessary to get their order done. "Jack, it's alright." Ba'ek assured his friend, "He just wants to talk. Go with him."
Jack rolled his eyes, "See, that's the problem. I DON'T want to talk with him."
Ba'ek laughed at his conduct, "Then don't. Just let him do the talking."
"Easy for you to say," Jack muttered. He took one last big breath and then eyed the guards, "Okay ... let's go girls."
***
Jack was feeling uneasy. Hunsa had stood in front of him for an hour with a penetrating gaze; the man was trying to read his mind. Any attempt to make conversation had ended in vain, in other words, ignored. Well, you couldn't really say that 'Nice view you got here' or 'Yo, what's that?' were good initiation lines, but it was the effort that counted.
"You're blocking your thoughts." Hunsa finally spoke.
Dryly, Jack replied, "Oh, and it took you what? An hour to figure it out?"
"Strong mind, strong spirit. I can see why Major Carter chose you."
"Hey, don't get me wrong. Flattery goes along with me. But cut the bull, what do you want?" He was getting irritated. It might of had something to do with having to stand up for a full one hour.
Hunsa was deep in thought, "Yes, yes, it can work," he nodded his head. And then he turned his attention to Jack, "I can give you something that you cannot have."
"I want to go home, with Carter," came the obvious demand.
Hunsa raised his hand and put it right in front of him, "Look at the stone!" he ordered.
"Or what? You're going to force me?" Jack challenged him.
"Guards." At that command, the two guards behind him forced him to look at the stone. One hand roughly pulled his hair so that his head was tilted back, one was pining on his shoulder. The others forced his eyelids to open. He resisted, naturally, but his hands and ankles were already chained, so there were not much that he could do. And then he saw the blue stone.
"Colonel," he recognised it straight away as his Major's voice.
"Carter?" he asked, rather unsure of what to make of this. She was standing on his left side, their arms were barely touching.
She looked up to see him, "Hi, Sir."
Totally lost on what to say and think, he echoed her, "Hi."
She took his left arm and encircled it with both of hers, one of her hands entwined with his, "I want this," she whispered as she rested her forehead on his shoulder.
"Me too," he was telling the truth. His free hand had travelled to caress her blond hair.
She sighed, "But we can't."
"Yes, we can. We'll just have to wait for the time to come." He assured her.
She tilted up her head to meet his eyes, "I don't want to wait."
Jack leaned down a bit, his forehead was touching hers, "We don't have a choice."
"Yes, we have," there was hope that radiated from her.
"No, we don't." he said softly.
"Yes, if we stay here we won't have to wait," she reasoned.
"What do you mean?"
"If we stay in Cayan, there are no regulations, no Goa'uld, no restrictions. Here ... we don't have to wait."
He stared at the woman before him, "I should've known."
"Sir?"
He kissed the top of her head, "You're not her."
to be continue
AN: I write this chapter because I need a break from studying ... I have exam to do this month. So pleaseee, make this poor soul happy and send feedbacks and reviews g. Thanks.