The Touched
Part 12
Sam rested her head against him and instantly felt herself relaxing. She was home. Rubbing a hand against her abdomen, she felt the muscles unclenching, the pain having ebbed away so quickly that it had almost shocked her to not be writhing in agony. She had been feeling ill at ease since making her decisions to visit the Tok'Ra, but she had convinced herself that that was the best thing to do. She needed time to think about things, to get it all straight in her own mind. It hadn't helped that her father had been fluttering about her, demanding to know what was wrong.
She still hadn't told him everything. He had finally (through Selmac) told her that he could sense her child, that he knew, so she wasn't hiding everything. What she still hadn't told him was the name of the father…although she suspected that he already knew. And if the look he had been giving Jack since arriving meant anything, then she was positive that he knew. She had explained the basics - that an alien influence had been the cause - but she hadn't made any mention of the requirement for the two to have strong feelings for each other.
Oh for crying out loud, Sam, she chastised herself, you can at least admit to yourself that your in love with him! It wasn't that she hadn't admitted it before, that she didn't know it with every fibre of her being, it was simply that, since being away from him, all it had been was an ache. An ache to see him, to feel him holding her, to look into his eyes…but it was a feeling of need, not love. She knew the love was there, but she was so consumed by the loss of him, that she couldn't feel it.
Jerking her head, she realised that he was talking to her. She could feel the eyes of the entire room on them and she suddenly became very aware of the fact that she was still tightly wrapped in his arms. She risked a look upwards and instantly regretted it, as she became lost in his concerned gaze.
"Sam?" he frowned a little, brushing her hair from her forehead, "Doc wants you in the infirmary, didn't you hear her?"
She shook her head and continued to stare at him, not caring that he was shifting a little uncomfortably - no doubt a reaction to the look. Her ex-boyfriend from High School had dubbed it that. It needed no explanation. Jacob Carter was a scary man to any male in the vicinity of his daughter.
"Come on, lets get you checked out." He said softly and she nodded her head again. He kept his arms on her, banding them around her waist as she stood on shaky legs. After a few moments of trying to stand, Sam grunted in frustration, her legs too weak to co-operate. Not caring what anyone thought of them (and missing the smirks on the faces of most of the personnel), Sam allowed Jack to swing her into his arms and carry her out of the room and to the infirmary, Janet, her father and the General following closely behind with the rest of SG1.
~x~x~x~x~x~
Turning her head, she groggily tried to put her thoughts into place. There was a harsh white light that could only be described as clinical and Sam instantly wished she was somewhere else. Trying to move, Sam was suddenly aware that she wasn't alone, a pair of arms aiding her futile attempt to sit.
"Jack," she said softly. Had her focus been correct she would have seen the look of utter surprise that adorned Jack's face, which was followed closely by a smile.
"Hey there, easy now." He sat up next to her on the bed, forcing himself to refrain from just pulling her into his arms and holding her till he was sure she'd always be safe and with him.
"How…what happened?"
He frowned, "Don't you remember anything?"
"A little." She scrunched up her face in concentration, trying to think of anything to remember. But her memory was shaky, like the remnants of a dream long since cherished. The more she tried to pull it all together, the more it fragmented into little pieces, each one more confusing than the previous. "I remember everything up until we went on the mission to P6X-989…then it all gets a little blurry…"
"You…you don't remember that mission? Or anything after it?"
"Not…not really." She frowned as he closed his eyes. Something had happened, something serious and she had a feeling in her gut that it was something to do with her. A feeling in her gut…oh, God she was going to be…
"Sam?" Jack followed her as she ran to the nearby bathroom, quickly depositing the last thing she had eaten in the toilet. He kneeled down beside her and began to run his hands over her back in soothing circles.
"Shh, it's okay, it'll be all right."
After she was sure there was nothing else to come up Sam relaxed a little, the motion Jack's hand was making across her back, along with his low voice whispering sweet things, was calming her nerves. But his touch was doing something else to her…his touch…
"Hey, what's wrong?"
Trying to turn away from him, she sniffed a little. But he wouldn't let her turn away, instead using his other hand to make her to face him. He ran his thumb across her cheek to wipe her tears, eliciting a small moan from her at the feel of such an intimate caress.
"What's wrong?" he repeated softly.
"I…I remember. I remember P6X-989…I remember about…I…"
"About the baby." he said softly and she nodded.
"What's going to happen, Jack?" she said, no longer caring about ranks and regulations. This was so much more than that, this was a life, a new life created by the love she felt for him…she couldn't let herself think of those things now, because there was something so much scarier than those consequences. She was going to be a mother. A single mother at that. Sure, Jack would never abandon their child and, in that sense, he would never abandon her. But it wasn't the same. She was going to be alone. She was going to have to raise a child. And that terrified her.
Exhaustion and fear took over her and she collapsed into his arms, her entire body wracked with sobs. She felt him clutching at her tightly as if he'd never let go. She never wanted him to. She needed him. She loved him. Holding on for all she could, she cried until her throat ached and her eyes were raw and burning, and still she held on, until she finally drifted into a fitful sleep.
~x~x~x~x~x~
Jack sighed as he wrapped the blanket around her tighter. She looked so small, so fragile, as if anything could break her. He didn't like it. It scared him to think of his Carter so lost and alone. No, she would never be alone, because he never planned on leaving her, whether she liked it or not. He felt like he had come close to losing her so many times; he had come close to losing her. And the last time it had been due to his own stupidity and his enormous mouth that seemed to love the taste of his foot.
He tenderly brushed her hair from her head as he looked at her. She was carrying his child, his child. He was going to be a father again, he was going to have a child. He wasn't sure what to feel; scared, overjoyed, scared, excited, scared. He had already failed at this once before, failed drastically. How could he possibly think of bringing another life into this world? Not that he really had much of a choice. He was in love with his Major, his 2IC, and that was all it needed to happen. She was all he needed.
*Ahem*
Jack turned cautiously, knowing exactly who was there, but somehow hoping that if he turned slowly enough then perhaps that person would leave and another could be there to meet his gaze when he turned. But, no, the same man was still there, still staring at him with that look.
"Jack." He nodded his head in greeting, but his eyes never left Jack's.
"Jacob."
"I think we need to have a little chat, don't you?" he asked, his gaze finally turning to his daughter. Jacob stared at Sam for a few moments, his eyes softening and watering a little at the pale ghost of her lying on the bed.
"Yeah. Yeah, I guess we do." Jack sighed and gave Sam one last look, leaning down to place a kiss to her head, not caring that her father was still standing behind him. "Sleep sweet, Sam." He whispered, before slowly following Jacob out of the door.
~x~x~x~x~x~
END PART 12
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