"Dawn, we have to go now." Xander took his keys out waiting for Dawn to come to the car.
"I'm sorry Xand, its just Melanie saw Shirley and Jim Quinn making out in the mall which is really gonna piss off her friend Stacy-"
"Dawn, I was in high school once with almost all girl friends. I have heard my fair share of Jenny kissing Ryan stories. Giles said tonight is a big night for the first, we need to get home."
"Hey Xander... I kinda feel weird asking this..."
"Is it about the birds and the bees?"
"No."
"Ok, ask away." He got out of the shopping mall parking lot going left, the longer way. So Dawn could talk to him and not worry about running out of time.
"Well, I was thinking after we talked when I became a not-so-potential again. You told me about how much harder it was on the rest of us. It has to be hard on me because the slayer is my sister and you can't choose family. But you chose this. And a part of me just can't believe that it's all because you like fighting evil."
"When did you become so insightful?"
"When I saw you. You aren't Xander."
"Ok, do we have to go over the whole I am driving a car therefore touching it so I cant be the first-"
"Not the first. You're you, but then you aren't."
"Dawn, I am going to tell you something important. Something that you can't repeat. What I am trusting you with is a big responsibility, I wouldn't trust willow with this, that is how important. Can you handle it?"
Dawn thought for a second and took a deep breath. "You can trust me."
"When the first goes... That is if we win, I'm leaving. Don't try to talk me out of it... It has to be done."
Dawn felt the tears build up and flow freely down her face.
"Why?"
"Short version: Its killing me being here. Slow and painful. Its no one's fault, not even my own. There is a job over on the east coast... they want me to be one of the big bosses, wear a tie and everything."
"When are you gonna tell them?"
"I'm not. I am leaving and not telling them where I am going. Dawn... I know this sucks for you the most. Having another male figure leave you and Buff. I am going to leave you a number and an address to write to me any time. None of them can know about it. I want you to always know that I'll be there for you. And when it gets really hard and you think no one understands, I do. I've been there, got the t-shirt. That is unless it's about a boy... If it's about a boy I know this guy Larry who you can talk to-"
"Its because she could never love you the way you need her to isn't it?"
"Its not Buffy's fault. She would just rather bonk an undead guy she hates than come and just talk to me. And the way things are going I think history is going to repeat its self and I... I can't go through that again... I can't feel like that and not be able to do anything about it."
"You can talk to me."
"Yeah, I can. You should get a Kleenex, we are almost there."
She opened the glove compartment and dried her eyes, which were now big and puffy.
"I'll tell Buffy I saw the guy I had a crush on kissing another girl in the food court."
"She has never given you any credit, has she?"
"Look who's talking."
*************
He watched as the Scooby meeting unfolded in front of him. He waited for his line to come up. That's all it was now, a line. He would come in with something that any cheerleader could do, or give Buff a place to fight the first freely. That was his legacy to Dawn... to be someone who just does something when absolutely needed. He saved the world sometimes, and sometimes he didn't tell anyone. The times he did they just treated it like another day at the office. They didn't know what it felt like to be Joe Normal and actually save the world.
The Scooby meeting was then finished and they went their respective ways. Xander of course made his way to the kitchen. He sat down with the paper in front of him, reading the obits for some weird blood draining victims. It might be a long shot but it was worth looking at. That's when Buffy came in, thirsty from talking so much during the meeting.
"You're quiet."
"Yeah... I'm thinking of killing you all in your sleep... You would have never seen it coming, but now that you've caught me you've spoiled my evil scheme."
"Its just... is there anything bothering you?"
"Naw, I'm good Buff. I guess it's just hit me. The first evil... Of all the big bads this is the biggest... I'm worried about the SITs, Willow, Dawn, Giles, and of course you. What if you have to make some big sacrifice again? Serious thoughts make Xander a dull boy." (Liar.) He though.
"Xand... I don't care if you make stupid jokes or not."
"Stupid jokes?"
"Is there any other way to describe them?"
"Well I think the effort of cracking jokes in the face of danger would count for something."
"That still doesn't make up for all the other times you crack stupid jokes."
"You slay me slayer. I am not the only one who puns... you have some nice puns..."
She hit Xander playfully on the arm. For the first time in a while Xander smiled a genuine smile while he was trying to give Buffy his best innocent look.
"What? I see you pun all the time... Can't a guy just say he likes your puns?"
"I think you pun good when you fight." Dawn came in the room deciding to make the SITs her guinea pigs for a new recipe she was thinking of making. "Of course yours aren't as good as Xander's, but you have that whole slayer thing."
Xander grinned and Buffy rolled her eyes. (I pun better than Xand all the time... lets see him try to do a roundhouse and think of a pun at the same time.)
**********
"You don't see it do you?" Xander walked through the sand to the rock Buffy was sitting on. It was sunrise, or sunset in reverse. She didn't know which.
"What? I don't have x-ray vision."
"This only takes the 20/20 kind Buff. You don't see me do you?"
"I see you, you're right in front of me."
Xander looked over at the sunrise and exhaled deeply.
"Everybody loves a clown."
"I thought clowns scared you?"
Xander looked over to her and smiled. "Not that kind. It's going to be too late soon. Will you be able to handle it?"
"The first evil?"
He looked down at his pants and brushed off non-existent sand.
"Sometimes the fights, the ones that really matter, have nothing to do with a battlefield. You're not ready for this fight."
"Why?"
"Because you're going to loose something you never thought you wanted to have."
She looked down at her hand and wasn't surprised when she saw it bloodied. She was holding a heart. She looked over at Xander's shirt where the blood flowed. She held out the heart.
"You're gonna need this."
"Keep it, its yours anyway."
He got up and walked up towards the sun. She looked back down at her hand to find the heart fall apart in her hands.
Buffy woke up startled and confused.
"I'm sorry Xand, its just Melanie saw Shirley and Jim Quinn making out in the mall which is really gonna piss off her friend Stacy-"
"Dawn, I was in high school once with almost all girl friends. I have heard my fair share of Jenny kissing Ryan stories. Giles said tonight is a big night for the first, we need to get home."
"Hey Xander... I kinda feel weird asking this..."
"Is it about the birds and the bees?"
"No."
"Ok, ask away." He got out of the shopping mall parking lot going left, the longer way. So Dawn could talk to him and not worry about running out of time.
"Well, I was thinking after we talked when I became a not-so-potential again. You told me about how much harder it was on the rest of us. It has to be hard on me because the slayer is my sister and you can't choose family. But you chose this. And a part of me just can't believe that it's all because you like fighting evil."
"When did you become so insightful?"
"When I saw you. You aren't Xander."
"Ok, do we have to go over the whole I am driving a car therefore touching it so I cant be the first-"
"Not the first. You're you, but then you aren't."
"Dawn, I am going to tell you something important. Something that you can't repeat. What I am trusting you with is a big responsibility, I wouldn't trust willow with this, that is how important. Can you handle it?"
Dawn thought for a second and took a deep breath. "You can trust me."
"When the first goes... That is if we win, I'm leaving. Don't try to talk me out of it... It has to be done."
Dawn felt the tears build up and flow freely down her face.
"Why?"
"Short version: Its killing me being here. Slow and painful. Its no one's fault, not even my own. There is a job over on the east coast... they want me to be one of the big bosses, wear a tie and everything."
"When are you gonna tell them?"
"I'm not. I am leaving and not telling them where I am going. Dawn... I know this sucks for you the most. Having another male figure leave you and Buff. I am going to leave you a number and an address to write to me any time. None of them can know about it. I want you to always know that I'll be there for you. And when it gets really hard and you think no one understands, I do. I've been there, got the t-shirt. That is unless it's about a boy... If it's about a boy I know this guy Larry who you can talk to-"
"Its because she could never love you the way you need her to isn't it?"
"Its not Buffy's fault. She would just rather bonk an undead guy she hates than come and just talk to me. And the way things are going I think history is going to repeat its self and I... I can't go through that again... I can't feel like that and not be able to do anything about it."
"You can talk to me."
"Yeah, I can. You should get a Kleenex, we are almost there."
She opened the glove compartment and dried her eyes, which were now big and puffy.
"I'll tell Buffy I saw the guy I had a crush on kissing another girl in the food court."
"She has never given you any credit, has she?"
"Look who's talking."
*************
He watched as the Scooby meeting unfolded in front of him. He waited for his line to come up. That's all it was now, a line. He would come in with something that any cheerleader could do, or give Buff a place to fight the first freely. That was his legacy to Dawn... to be someone who just does something when absolutely needed. He saved the world sometimes, and sometimes he didn't tell anyone. The times he did they just treated it like another day at the office. They didn't know what it felt like to be Joe Normal and actually save the world.
The Scooby meeting was then finished and they went their respective ways. Xander of course made his way to the kitchen. He sat down with the paper in front of him, reading the obits for some weird blood draining victims. It might be a long shot but it was worth looking at. That's when Buffy came in, thirsty from talking so much during the meeting.
"You're quiet."
"Yeah... I'm thinking of killing you all in your sleep... You would have never seen it coming, but now that you've caught me you've spoiled my evil scheme."
"Its just... is there anything bothering you?"
"Naw, I'm good Buff. I guess it's just hit me. The first evil... Of all the big bads this is the biggest... I'm worried about the SITs, Willow, Dawn, Giles, and of course you. What if you have to make some big sacrifice again? Serious thoughts make Xander a dull boy." (Liar.) He though.
"Xand... I don't care if you make stupid jokes or not."
"Stupid jokes?"
"Is there any other way to describe them?"
"Well I think the effort of cracking jokes in the face of danger would count for something."
"That still doesn't make up for all the other times you crack stupid jokes."
"You slay me slayer. I am not the only one who puns... you have some nice puns..."
She hit Xander playfully on the arm. For the first time in a while Xander smiled a genuine smile while he was trying to give Buffy his best innocent look.
"What? I see you pun all the time... Can't a guy just say he likes your puns?"
"I think you pun good when you fight." Dawn came in the room deciding to make the SITs her guinea pigs for a new recipe she was thinking of making. "Of course yours aren't as good as Xander's, but you have that whole slayer thing."
Xander grinned and Buffy rolled her eyes. (I pun better than Xand all the time... lets see him try to do a roundhouse and think of a pun at the same time.)
**********
"You don't see it do you?" Xander walked through the sand to the rock Buffy was sitting on. It was sunrise, or sunset in reverse. She didn't know which.
"What? I don't have x-ray vision."
"This only takes the 20/20 kind Buff. You don't see me do you?"
"I see you, you're right in front of me."
Xander looked over at the sunrise and exhaled deeply.
"Everybody loves a clown."
"I thought clowns scared you?"
Xander looked over to her and smiled. "Not that kind. It's going to be too late soon. Will you be able to handle it?"
"The first evil?"
He looked down at his pants and brushed off non-existent sand.
"Sometimes the fights, the ones that really matter, have nothing to do with a battlefield. You're not ready for this fight."
"Why?"
"Because you're going to loose something you never thought you wanted to have."
She looked down at her hand and wasn't surprised when she saw it bloodied. She was holding a heart. She looked over at Xander's shirt where the blood flowed. She held out the heart.
"You're gonna need this."
"Keep it, its yours anyway."
He got up and walked up towards the sun. She looked back down at her hand to find the heart fall apart in her hands.
Buffy woke up startled and confused.