I never really wanted to destroy Tokyo. Really. I woke up that morning and said to myself, self, you are not going to stereotype your life, you are going to get up, eat some fish, and maybe take a nap. It didn't happen that way, and I'm sorry that it didn't, but I simply can't be blamed.
It was a normal day to start off with, maybe a smidgen to cold for my liking, being a reptile and all. I was calm and collected, nothing was going to ruin my day. Nothing that was, until that dang Sea Monster. He always shows up, strutting his stuff, throwing his weight around like he's some sort of big shot. He doesn't even have atomic breath or eye-beams, and he is certainly no match for me, but I just couldn't take his shenanigans that morning. Maybe I lashed out a little, but it was his fault for being so childish.
Now I was not so calm, you might even say that I was filled with rage, a murderous rage. He had just made me so angry! Well, I stomped around the sea floor for a bit, breaking things, throwing rocks at whales(they wouldn't sit still), this generally this calms me down. Not that day. I kicked up such a fuss that I must have sunk a ship, and hit me right on the head. I thought it was a fishing trawler, so I just ate it in one big gulp. Maybe if I had been in a more sensible state I would have noted t the big "Sapporo" on the side more carefully, but I didn't.
Well, the next two or three days were a haze, Mothra says she found me passed out near Osaka, 100 miles or so out to sea. Then they made that terrible movie about me and the whole incident. No resemblance at ALL I must say. I'm far less rubbery in real life.
So as you can see, it was a combination of factors completely outside my control that lead to the unfortunate incident in question, and believe me when I say that my testimony stands out as the only true account of the whole story.
It was a normal day to start off with, maybe a smidgen to cold for my liking, being a reptile and all. I was calm and collected, nothing was going to ruin my day. Nothing that was, until that dang Sea Monster. He always shows up, strutting his stuff, throwing his weight around like he's some sort of big shot. He doesn't even have atomic breath or eye-beams, and he is certainly no match for me, but I just couldn't take his shenanigans that morning. Maybe I lashed out a little, but it was his fault for being so childish.
Now I was not so calm, you might even say that I was filled with rage, a murderous rage. He had just made me so angry! Well, I stomped around the sea floor for a bit, breaking things, throwing rocks at whales(they wouldn't sit still), this generally this calms me down. Not that day. I kicked up such a fuss that I must have sunk a ship, and hit me right on the head. I thought it was a fishing trawler, so I just ate it in one big gulp. Maybe if I had been in a more sensible state I would have noted t the big "Sapporo" on the side more carefully, but I didn't.
Well, the next two or three days were a haze, Mothra says she found me passed out near Osaka, 100 miles or so out to sea. Then they made that terrible movie about me and the whole incident. No resemblance at ALL I must say. I'm far less rubbery in real life.
So as you can see, it was a combination of factors completely outside my control that lead to the unfortunate incident in question, and believe me when I say that my testimony stands out as the only true account of the whole story.