Max fixed her gaze on a distant streetlight shaking her head. Unbelievable.
She extracted her legs from around the can and gave it a pat, *Touche'*
Alec was walking toward her; his approach darkened by the light over the door behind him, silhouetting his broad chest and shoulders that tapered down to a trim waist where she visualized his perfect abs right through his shirt, every hard rippling --
Now would be a good time to peel herself off the ground.
What is he doing out here anyway? Shouldn't he be with Asha? Max casually rose from her graceless position, wiped off her pants and leaned against the building, successfully appearing the exact opposite of embarrassed, unsure and unexpectedly hopeful.
*Wipe that smirk off your face *, she bitched in her head.
Alec advanced cautiously. With the anxiety and nervous energy he'd built up in recent minutes, the effort it took not to release it all in a fit of laughter was nearly painful. Though he couldn't help smiling at her nonchalance - standing there drumming her fingers on her crossed arms as if she hadn't just clumsily flipped into heap of garbage.
He sat with his back to her on the curb not trusting himself to look her in the eye without making a smart-ass remark about her agile performance.
"What do you want?" she said, harshly releasing some of her own energy.
His head dropped at her tone as she sucked the humor from him. Max closed her eyes.
"Sorry," she said, the word hardly rolling off her tongue, "I mean, shouldn't you be in there with blondie?"
"Huh?" Alec turned slightly toward her and lifted his head as it hit him, "Oh, that. You've got it all wrong," he said looking her knowingly in the eye as he stood, "We're not like that."
"Hey, I could care less what you and the bleach queen of Seattle are --"
"I was," he interrupted leaning his shoulder inches from hers to face her properly, "thanking her. Nothing more."
Max pushed her back to the wall and executed a long bored blink with a shrug for a twist, "Thanking her. Pleasing her. Whatever."
Alec laughed quietly.
"Something funny?"
"Yeah. You see, apparently, I was thanking her for something that you did."
"Oh?"
Alec nodded.
"Hm," she added with a hint of finality.
He watched her carefully, waiting for an admission. A sign. Anything. But when it became evident she was perfectly satisfied to leave it at that, he pushed on.
"You brought me home last night."
Her quick shocked glance confirmed what he already knew. Her fingers drummed faster. Denying it now would be pointless.
"Yeah, well, you were a mess."
"Yes, I was," he agreed readily.
"So, what gave me away?"
"Purple socks."
She mentally hissed, *I knew I wasn't fast enough*
"So you saw Asha's --"
"Yeah."
"That were actually --"
"Yours."
"And you thought --"
He nodded, "But then she --"
"Told you it was me."
They nodded together.
He pressed his back against the wall as well. Max looked down the street in the opposite direction then at the ground. Her fingers resumed their drum roll.
Now what?
"So. I've been wondering, you know, since then."
Max stiffened.
"Why purple?"
She let out her breath, a modicum of comfort returning.
"It's my favorite color."
"I've never seen you wear it."
She frowned and shook her head, "I couldn't wear it on the outside. It's . I don't know, personal. Intimate. There's just something about the color purple that's . I mean it's like ." she continued to shake her head, at a loss.
"Anger," he said quietly.
Huh?
"And sadness," he added, "so mixed up . that you can't tell one from the other."
An understanding smile crept onto her face as she studied his pensive profile, marveling at his simply profound statement, "Yes! That's exactly it."
He tilted his head toward her, "Try not to sound so surprised. I may well be a proclaimed self-serving screw up, but if there's one thing I understand," he scratched the back of his head and sighed, "It's purple."
"I know," she said seriously, "And you're not."
He looked to the ground, processing what she just said.
"Do you mean that?"
"I do."
Alec bit back the smile that threatened to take over his face. The silence that followed was less torturous this time around.
Finally Alec raised an eyebrow, "So, uh," he feigned a peek down her shirt, "Anything else purple under there?"
"Under where?" she joked innocently, twisting her upper body away from him.
"Cute."
He playfully grabbed for her, seizing nothing but air as she blurred away from him letting out a Julia Roberts squeal.
"Come on," he said, pouncing in front of her, laughing, "My interest is purely psychological."
"Sure it is," she said sarcastically, even as the sound of his laughter warmed her heart.
"That's alright. I don't need you to show me anyway," he remarked matter-of- factly, crouching before her, staring with mock intent at her beltline, "I bet you didn't know I have X-ray vision, did you Max. Hm. Never would've pegged you for a 'thong' girl."
She giggled, placing a hand on top of his head and when he stilled beneath the gesture, she tested the waters, tangling her fingers through his hair, lightly massaging his scalp.
His mind instantly began to swim, floating unfocused on a flood of bittersweet sensations from the night before. Knees dropped heavy to the ground and he drifted closer and closer, jerking back in surprise when his cheek brushed against her stomach, unaware of his advance.
"I'm.," he whispered, closing his eyes, vainly trying to gain control of his voice.
Max slipped her arm around his shoulders and pulled him to her, accepting the now familiar urge to protect the cocky X5. Even from himself.
Especially from himself.
"Sh."
Her small waist disappeared within his strong embrace, as she silently rocked him softly from side to side.
"Why did you run?"
Max felt her heart sink. All that night she debated whether or not to be there when he woke up, but by dawn she had herself convinced he wouldn't want her there. Even then she found it difficult to leave his side and almost changed her mind, but when he began to awaken, she panicked.
Flew wildly out the door, stopping only to grab her shoes from the living room on the way out. Actually went so far as to push her bike for several blocks before starting it, knowing he would recognize her baby's purr.
"Max?" he muffled into her shirt.
"I didn't think I'd be welcome."
Alec loosened his hold.
"You've made it pretty clear in the past that you don't want my help and I guess I just figured dragging you out of Crash, driving you home, carrying you to bed and playing Nurse Betty all night kind of violated your wishes."
He slowly stood listening to her validly use his 'stay away from me' spiel to excuse her hasty retreat.
"I was scared," she admitted looking at his shoulder, "of my feelings, of how you'd react to them. I know how hard it is for you to trust, Alec and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin what little you had in me."
She thought he didn't trust her? Guess he hadn't given her much cause to believe otherwise, but truth be told, he trusted her more than anyone - to do the right thing, to make the right choices, to keep him in line. When it came right down to it, he trusted her more than he trusted himself.
Alec let go of her hips and turned his palms up staring at them while he waited for the words, then took a half breath and faced her.
"I've killed people," he began quietly, soul pouring from his eyes, "so many people," Alec tilted his head away. "They were missions. Orders. That's all they were to me. Orders. They're dead and I'm here . living. Where is the justice in that, Max?" his jumbled thoughts spilled as if overflowed.
Max froze. He was opening up to her, trusting her with his innermost torments and she was frozen.
Solid.
"And I keep thinking, maybe he'd be alive. Mr. Berrisford. If he'd been given that justice, Max, if you hadn't stopped him, if you would've just let him ."
His voice trailed off to nothing. Her eyes went wide.
"No," she stressed, finally kick started into action, "You think that would've have been justice? You think that would have guaranteed Berrisford's life? Probably would have made him do it sooner," she waited for the words to sink in before she continued, "When you did those things, your mind wasn't your own. It belonged to Manticore. They conditioned you from infancy to do their bidding, not yours. One could no more blame you than a gun or a knife. But you see what they didn't count on, what neither they nor you even knew existed, was your heart. And when you found it, from wherever it had been hiding, you became whole. That's when they lost you, Alec. You're not a killer. You never were. You just didn't know yourself."
The sound of trickling water that had gone largely unnoticed now provided a soothing interlude. Max watched his expression shift back and forth from hope to disbelief, finally settling on something that resembled tentative acceptance.
Max tugged on his jacket sleeve, "You're going to be okay," echoing her sentiment from the night before.
Alec nodded slowly, a small smile forming, "We both are," he added, believing the promise held in her eyes.
Max allowed herself a tiny smirk, "So," she said with an eyebrow wiggle, "Asha got hers. When are you gonna thank me?"
"Oh, my dear Max," Alec started playfully. Then his voice deepened, becoming sensuously serious, "I think I'd rather please you."
She froze again. Or was it a shiver?
His eyes roamed her slowly from bottom to top finally settling on her lips, concentrating on them fully. He cradled her face and her mouth opened instinctively, awaiting its reward, but when he was a breath away he stopped, savoring the anticipation, merely brushing the fullness of his lower lip lightly against hers.
Pulling back slightly, he bit the flavor she left behind. The low rumbling moan that followed sent a charge through every nerve in her body, converging in her chest. Her answering sigh brought his mouth back to hers, which he now took completely, his tongue leaving tingling trails along the inside.
As their tongues danced, he inhaled deeply, breathing through her. Filling him with a feeling of life he'd only tasted before.
Heady in its depths of passion and joy, Max lost herself in his touch.
His hands
Fanning slowly up her sides and over her back.
His hands
Clutching her softly as though she might disappear.
His hands
Brushing hair from her face with such reverence it brought a tear to her eye.
They shared an intense gaze that could only be described as love and then came together again, making up for lost time with each passionate kiss and tender embrace.
**********
Asha watched quietly from the cracked door. She put a hand over her heart and sighed.
*Beautiful*
The tell-tale whir that approached from behind and left twice as fast put a smile on her face.
*Guess he believes it now*
Max got her man.
And unless she missed her mark, Sketchy got his.
Asha afforded herself one last appreciative glance at the sensuous display, before bouncing to the bar.
Now it was her turn.
the end
Alec was walking toward her; his approach darkened by the light over the door behind him, silhouetting his broad chest and shoulders that tapered down to a trim waist where she visualized his perfect abs right through his shirt, every hard rippling --
Now would be a good time to peel herself off the ground.
What is he doing out here anyway? Shouldn't he be with Asha? Max casually rose from her graceless position, wiped off her pants and leaned against the building, successfully appearing the exact opposite of embarrassed, unsure and unexpectedly hopeful.
*Wipe that smirk off your face *, she bitched in her head.
Alec advanced cautiously. With the anxiety and nervous energy he'd built up in recent minutes, the effort it took not to release it all in a fit of laughter was nearly painful. Though he couldn't help smiling at her nonchalance - standing there drumming her fingers on her crossed arms as if she hadn't just clumsily flipped into heap of garbage.
He sat with his back to her on the curb not trusting himself to look her in the eye without making a smart-ass remark about her agile performance.
"What do you want?" she said, harshly releasing some of her own energy.
His head dropped at her tone as she sucked the humor from him. Max closed her eyes.
"Sorry," she said, the word hardly rolling off her tongue, "I mean, shouldn't you be in there with blondie?"
"Huh?" Alec turned slightly toward her and lifted his head as it hit him, "Oh, that. You've got it all wrong," he said looking her knowingly in the eye as he stood, "We're not like that."
"Hey, I could care less what you and the bleach queen of Seattle are --"
"I was," he interrupted leaning his shoulder inches from hers to face her properly, "thanking her. Nothing more."
Max pushed her back to the wall and executed a long bored blink with a shrug for a twist, "Thanking her. Pleasing her. Whatever."
Alec laughed quietly.
"Something funny?"
"Yeah. You see, apparently, I was thanking her for something that you did."
"Oh?"
Alec nodded.
"Hm," she added with a hint of finality.
He watched her carefully, waiting for an admission. A sign. Anything. But when it became evident she was perfectly satisfied to leave it at that, he pushed on.
"You brought me home last night."
Her quick shocked glance confirmed what he already knew. Her fingers drummed faster. Denying it now would be pointless.
"Yeah, well, you were a mess."
"Yes, I was," he agreed readily.
"So, what gave me away?"
"Purple socks."
She mentally hissed, *I knew I wasn't fast enough*
"So you saw Asha's --"
"Yeah."
"That were actually --"
"Yours."
"And you thought --"
He nodded, "But then she --"
"Told you it was me."
They nodded together.
He pressed his back against the wall as well. Max looked down the street in the opposite direction then at the ground. Her fingers resumed their drum roll.
Now what?
"So. I've been wondering, you know, since then."
Max stiffened.
"Why purple?"
She let out her breath, a modicum of comfort returning.
"It's my favorite color."
"I've never seen you wear it."
She frowned and shook her head, "I couldn't wear it on the outside. It's . I don't know, personal. Intimate. There's just something about the color purple that's . I mean it's like ." she continued to shake her head, at a loss.
"Anger," he said quietly.
Huh?
"And sadness," he added, "so mixed up . that you can't tell one from the other."
An understanding smile crept onto her face as she studied his pensive profile, marveling at his simply profound statement, "Yes! That's exactly it."
He tilted his head toward her, "Try not to sound so surprised. I may well be a proclaimed self-serving screw up, but if there's one thing I understand," he scratched the back of his head and sighed, "It's purple."
"I know," she said seriously, "And you're not."
He looked to the ground, processing what she just said.
"Do you mean that?"
"I do."
Alec bit back the smile that threatened to take over his face. The silence that followed was less torturous this time around.
Finally Alec raised an eyebrow, "So, uh," he feigned a peek down her shirt, "Anything else purple under there?"
"Under where?" she joked innocently, twisting her upper body away from him.
"Cute."
He playfully grabbed for her, seizing nothing but air as she blurred away from him letting out a Julia Roberts squeal.
"Come on," he said, pouncing in front of her, laughing, "My interest is purely psychological."
"Sure it is," she said sarcastically, even as the sound of his laughter warmed her heart.
"That's alright. I don't need you to show me anyway," he remarked matter-of- factly, crouching before her, staring with mock intent at her beltline, "I bet you didn't know I have X-ray vision, did you Max. Hm. Never would've pegged you for a 'thong' girl."
She giggled, placing a hand on top of his head and when he stilled beneath the gesture, she tested the waters, tangling her fingers through his hair, lightly massaging his scalp.
His mind instantly began to swim, floating unfocused on a flood of bittersweet sensations from the night before. Knees dropped heavy to the ground and he drifted closer and closer, jerking back in surprise when his cheek brushed against her stomach, unaware of his advance.
"I'm.," he whispered, closing his eyes, vainly trying to gain control of his voice.
Max slipped her arm around his shoulders and pulled him to her, accepting the now familiar urge to protect the cocky X5. Even from himself.
Especially from himself.
"Sh."
Her small waist disappeared within his strong embrace, as she silently rocked him softly from side to side.
"Why did you run?"
Max felt her heart sink. All that night she debated whether or not to be there when he woke up, but by dawn she had herself convinced he wouldn't want her there. Even then she found it difficult to leave his side and almost changed her mind, but when he began to awaken, she panicked.
Flew wildly out the door, stopping only to grab her shoes from the living room on the way out. Actually went so far as to push her bike for several blocks before starting it, knowing he would recognize her baby's purr.
"Max?" he muffled into her shirt.
"I didn't think I'd be welcome."
Alec loosened his hold.
"You've made it pretty clear in the past that you don't want my help and I guess I just figured dragging you out of Crash, driving you home, carrying you to bed and playing Nurse Betty all night kind of violated your wishes."
He slowly stood listening to her validly use his 'stay away from me' spiel to excuse her hasty retreat.
"I was scared," she admitted looking at his shoulder, "of my feelings, of how you'd react to them. I know how hard it is for you to trust, Alec and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin what little you had in me."
She thought he didn't trust her? Guess he hadn't given her much cause to believe otherwise, but truth be told, he trusted her more than anyone - to do the right thing, to make the right choices, to keep him in line. When it came right down to it, he trusted her more than he trusted himself.
Alec let go of her hips and turned his palms up staring at them while he waited for the words, then took a half breath and faced her.
"I've killed people," he began quietly, soul pouring from his eyes, "so many people," Alec tilted his head away. "They were missions. Orders. That's all they were to me. Orders. They're dead and I'm here . living. Where is the justice in that, Max?" his jumbled thoughts spilled as if overflowed.
Max froze. He was opening up to her, trusting her with his innermost torments and she was frozen.
Solid.
"And I keep thinking, maybe he'd be alive. Mr. Berrisford. If he'd been given that justice, Max, if you hadn't stopped him, if you would've just let him ."
His voice trailed off to nothing. Her eyes went wide.
"No," she stressed, finally kick started into action, "You think that would've have been justice? You think that would have guaranteed Berrisford's life? Probably would have made him do it sooner," she waited for the words to sink in before she continued, "When you did those things, your mind wasn't your own. It belonged to Manticore. They conditioned you from infancy to do their bidding, not yours. One could no more blame you than a gun or a knife. But you see what they didn't count on, what neither they nor you even knew existed, was your heart. And when you found it, from wherever it had been hiding, you became whole. That's when they lost you, Alec. You're not a killer. You never were. You just didn't know yourself."
The sound of trickling water that had gone largely unnoticed now provided a soothing interlude. Max watched his expression shift back and forth from hope to disbelief, finally settling on something that resembled tentative acceptance.
Max tugged on his jacket sleeve, "You're going to be okay," echoing her sentiment from the night before.
Alec nodded slowly, a small smile forming, "We both are," he added, believing the promise held in her eyes.
Max allowed herself a tiny smirk, "So," she said with an eyebrow wiggle, "Asha got hers. When are you gonna thank me?"
"Oh, my dear Max," Alec started playfully. Then his voice deepened, becoming sensuously serious, "I think I'd rather please you."
She froze again. Or was it a shiver?
His eyes roamed her slowly from bottom to top finally settling on her lips, concentrating on them fully. He cradled her face and her mouth opened instinctively, awaiting its reward, but when he was a breath away he stopped, savoring the anticipation, merely brushing the fullness of his lower lip lightly against hers.
Pulling back slightly, he bit the flavor she left behind. The low rumbling moan that followed sent a charge through every nerve in her body, converging in her chest. Her answering sigh brought his mouth back to hers, which he now took completely, his tongue leaving tingling trails along the inside.
As their tongues danced, he inhaled deeply, breathing through her. Filling him with a feeling of life he'd only tasted before.
Heady in its depths of passion and joy, Max lost herself in his touch.
His hands
Fanning slowly up her sides and over her back.
His hands
Clutching her softly as though she might disappear.
His hands
Brushing hair from her face with such reverence it brought a tear to her eye.
They shared an intense gaze that could only be described as love and then came together again, making up for lost time with each passionate kiss and tender embrace.
**********
Asha watched quietly from the cracked door. She put a hand over her heart and sighed.
*Beautiful*
The tell-tale whir that approached from behind and left twice as fast put a smile on her face.
*Guess he believes it now*
Max got her man.
And unless she missed her mark, Sketchy got his.
Asha afforded herself one last appreciative glance at the sensuous display, before bouncing to the bar.
Now it was her turn.
the end