(Real) Chapter 2
Circumstances
I believe in love at first sight. And if that doesn't work, stalk 'em til it does.
-- Affirmation No. 118 of the Mellon Hoth
"No! Bad penguin! Leggo my bookbag!"
I kicked the offending bird out of the way and managed to slam the door behind me. I took a deep breath of the crisp January air. Free at last.
And right on time. I scrambled down the sidewalk to meet the school bus rumbling towards me. I hopped on as quickly as I could – the driver never pauses very long at my house.
As I walked down the aisle towards my customary seat at the back of the bus, a strange feeling came over me. You know how your spine tingles when you start thinking about the volcanic planet scene in Star Wars III, well at least it'd better be in there because if not about a zillion angry fans will be mobbing George Lucas? Well, this was like that, only in reverse.
You know, animals can actually tell if someone is looking at them. Well, humans can too to some extent, but not like prey animals especially. I once overheard a chipmunk telling a squirrel—
Hmm. You know, I'm so used to someone cutting me off at that point in the story that I'm not sure I know how it ends anymore.
Where was I?
Oh yes, the strange feeling. Right about then I figured out what it was. No one was looking at me.
Now, granted, it was a big bus, packed with teens, most of whom I didn't know. But normally when I get on the bus every day, I am greeted by at least two or three stares. Or twenty or thirty as the case may be.
This wouldn't do. I stopped in the middle of the bus and drew in a huge breath.
"I AM CURLY THE MAGNIFICIANT! ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO ME!" I added one of my trademark lunatic laughs for effect.
Much better.
I marched back to my seat triumphantly. Someone near the front yelled "Freak!" in what I assumed was my direction. I smiled and flopped down by my two minions.
Eugene was looking out the window. Brainy was playing a game on his graphing calculator. Neither acknowledged me so I socked them both.
"Hello Curly." Brainy didn't look up.
"Was that a penguin you were trying to keep in your house?" asked Eugene without turning.
I bet Voldemort never has this kind of trouble from his minions.
"Yes, it was a penguin. No, I didn't steal it, Dad did and he's going to put them back. And yes, I've been cursed by an inebriated gypsy, thanks for asking."
Of course, Voldemort would also never let himself get cursed by an amateur.
Eugene ignored me, but Brainy finally looked up. His double-take satisfied me immensely.
"Where's your glasses? What are you wearing? Who are you and what have you done with Curly?" he asked in rapid succession. Eugene turned around and jumped back so fast that he wacked his head against the window. I ignored Brainy and looked hard at Eugene.
"Say it." I demanded. Eugene rolled his eyes.
"Do I have to?" he whined.
"Yes." One must enforce strict rules with ones minions.
"Fine. I'm ok. Happy?"
"Yes."
Brainy shook his head at me. "Dude, that hasn't been his phrase since like fifth grade. I swear no one on Earth lives in the past as much as you do Curly."
"Hey look, Helga's taking the bus today."
"What? She never takes the bus, she always—" Brainy cut himself off with his own breathing as he scanned the bus. His asthma's gotten better lately, but it still kicks in when he gets excited.
Eugene and I laughed. Brainy slumped in his seat and scowled at us.
"Should have known. Like you could have seen her anyway without your glasses."
"Actually—"
"Check it out, Gerald finally got that car he's been wanting!" Eugene pointed and I crawled over Brainy to get to the window. Sure enough, Gerald was cruising down the road beside us, one hand on the wheel and the other arm around a smiling Phoebe.
"Oooo."
"Cool."
"What kind is it?" asked Brainy, getting out his calculator again.
"Umm."
"It's a, uh…"
"It's black." I decided.
"Yep, definitely black." Eugene agreed.
Before we could elaborate more, however (I was about to say that it was black inside the car also), Gerald sped up and the car passed the bus. This allowed us a glimpse into the back seat, where Arnold and—
"Helga!" Eugene blinked and rubbed his eyes.
"Second time isn't funny Eugene."
"No! I mean, Helga! And Arnold! In the back seat!"
"That's new." I observed.
"No it's not." said Brainy, still looking at his calculator.
"Since when?" Eugene wanted to know.
"Friday. In the park by the fountain. At 8:27pm."
I didn't argue. If there's one thing you don't doubt Brainy on, it's facts about Helga.
"This calls for an emergency meeting." I decided, and Eugene nodded.
"No. I'm fine. Really." Brainy put away the calculator again (he can never get past level 1 on Space Invaders anyway), sat back and stared at the front of the bus.
I ignored him. "I hereby bring this meeting of the Mellon Hoth to order. As president, I move we skip ceremonials and old business until next time and proceed directly to new business."
"I second the motion." added Eugene with a worried glance at Brainy.
"All for the motion?" Eugene and I said "Aye." Brainy said nothing. "All opposed?" Brainy continued staring towards the front. "The ayes have it. Now—" I turned to Brainy.
"Wait, what was that about a curse Curly?" Trust Eugene to finally make the connection now.
"The president reminds the treasurer that the meeting is still in session." I snapped.
"Who's that?" Brainy sat up. Am I the only one who takes proper procedure seriously? I glanced at the front.
It was Lila. Guess she dyed her hair. And wore something other than that stupid-looking green prep-dress. That's still no reason for Eugene and Brainy to go all goggle-eyed like that, especially when we're trying to hold an emergency meeting here.
Lila stood uncertainly at the front of the bus, by her normal seat right behind the driver. One of her harem-boys was sitting there already, waiting for her. Why wasn't she sitting?
"Is…is she looking at…us?" gasped Eugene.
She was. So what? I took off my shoe and was about to clock Eugene with it when I saw something out of the corner of my eye that made my blood run cold.
Lila, popularity personified, had just taken a step towards the back of the bus. Towards the geeks. Towards us. I felt my eyes narrow in her direction.
She wouldn't dare.
A/N: Sorry for the super-long wait from me guys, my laptop totally died (the system board was defective) right after I posted the prologue for Ice Water and I'm just now getting it back to normal. Expect many updates on all my stories soon!
By the way, in order to make this story a bit faster for me to write, I'm not going to answer reviewers unless it's something really really important that I want to get across. That way I'll have more time for this and Ice Water (I'll still answer them in Ice Water, don't worry). But I really appreciate all reviews, even if I don't answer. Thanks ya'll! ~PJ