A/n- I got to warn everyone, this is some serious Harry angst. It's also from Harry's point of view, and it his thoughts. As if you brilliant people couldn't figure that one out by yourself. :-) Well, go on! Read, please!

Why? Why me? Why my parents? Why Cedric? I'm fifteen years old, but I feel more like five hundred. A fifteen year old boy shouldn't be worrying about the fact that he's putting everyone he cares about in danger just by associating with they. A fifteen year old boy shouldn't be worried about the things that have been thrust upon me.

What do I do to ignore them behind me?

Do I follow my instincts blindly?

Do I hide my pride/ From these bad dreams

And give into thought that are maddening?

Dreams. There's another "why". Why am I plagued by these dreams, every night? The images of Cedric and my parents are haunting me. Every night, I relive that awful experience. It's all HIS fault. What did I do to deserve this? And more importantly, what can I do about it?

Do I/ Sit here and try to stand it?

Or do I/ Try to catch them - ed?

Dumbeldore tells me I'm safe here. Yeah, right. I'm really safe, with people who'd gladly hand me over to Voldermort or the Death Eaters if they showed up on the front step. I'm hopeless. I can't do anything about a problem that I caused. I just have to sit here, because I'm Harry Potter. Why do I need to be protected? I've never done anything, I just got lucky. My parents died for me. What did I do to deserve that? It's all my fault. I can't do this anymore.

Because I can't hold on/ When I'm stretched so thin

I make the right moves but I'm lost within

Fact. People are dead or are going to die. Fact. It's my fault. Fact. I can't do a damn thing about it. Fact. I can't do this anymore.

I put on my daily facade but then

I just end up getting hurt again

By myself [Myself]

Why does everyone expect me to be able to do anything about this? I'm just a short, skinny, fifteen year old boy. Who just happens to be expected to stop the most evil wizard who ever lived from taking over the world. Even Ron and Hermione, my best friends, have me up on this pedastal. Well, take me off it.

I ask why, but in my mind

I find I can't rely on myself

What if I fail? Then what happens? I don't stand a chance of living through this. For whatever reason, I'm number one of Voldermorts Most Wanted List.

I can't hold on

[To what I want when I'm stretched so thin}

It's all too much to take in

Every night, I relive the third task. He took blood from me. Wormtail, that , that traitor. He was my parents best friend. I should blame him. But I can't. I blame myself. It's my fault, no matter what anyone else thinks. I'm the reason that the Diggorys' are mourning the death of their only son. Who else will feel that pain, because of me?

I can't hold on

[To anything watching everything spin]

With thoughts of failure sinking in

What if I can't live up to everyone's expectations? I want to be doing something, not just sitting here on my behind.

If I/ turn my back I'm defenseless

And to go blindly seems senseless

How can I deal with this? Simple answer: I can't. But I have to. The Death Eaters all know who I am, and I know who many of them are. But, of course, they won't go to jail. No one who has that power believes what I say. All right, so everyone expects me to save them, but they don't believe what I say.

If I hide my pride and let it all go on/ Then they'll

Take from me 'till everything is gone

If I let them go I'll be outdone

But If I try to catch them I'll be outrun

But I don't care about all of that. What I care about is Why. Why did Voldermort want my parents so much? Why did he try to get my mom to stand aside? Why did the curse deflect, destroying Voldermort, leaving me orphaned and with a scar on my head? Why did Peter go to the Dark Side? If he hadn't, maybe the inevitable would have just been delayed. But what if someone else defeated Voldermort? They I'd still have my family.

If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer

They I'll be buried in the silence of the answer

[By myself]

He killed my parents. He killed my dad, James Potter, whom everyone says I look just like; who was friends with Sirius Black and Remus Lupin; who was co author of the Marauders Map; who was an animagi; and who loved and died for me. He killed my mom, Lily Potter, who I get my eyes from; who was good at charms; who had red hair; and who loved and died for me. And that just about sums up what I know about my parents.

How do you think/ I've lost so much

I'm so afraid/ I'm out of touch

Every year, a bit more of the puzzle is put together. What will I learn this year? Will I finally learn why Voldermort was only after my dad and I, and not my mom?

How do you expect/ I will know what to do

When all I know/ Is what you tell me to

I'm not normal. I'm Harry Potter, hero of the Wizarding world. I'm Harry Potter, orphaned by Dark Magic. I'm Harry Potter, directly or indirectly, it doesn't really matter, the cause of Cedric Diggory's death. I'm the direct cause of the Dark Lord's return.

Don't you know

I can't tell you how to make it go

No matter what I do, How hard I try

I can't seem to convince myself why

I'm stuck on the outside.

Just let me live a normal life. That's all I want. I want my mom and dad back, I want brothers and sisters. Ron has no idea how lucky he is. I want to go to Hogwarts with my two best friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. I want to play on the Quiddich team and win the Cup. I want to pass the days not worrying waking up to wonder if this sunrise is my last, and I don't want to go to bed wondering if this sunset is my last. I want to go into the Leaky Cauldron and Diagon Alley and not have everyone gawking at my scar and whispering about me when I pass by.

I can't hold on

[To what I want when I'm stretched so thin}

It's all too much to take in

I want everyone to take me off of that pedestal they have me on.

I can't hold on

[To anything watching everything spin]

With thoughts of failure sinking in

A/n- Okay, now it's time for you to do your duty as reviewers! Review! My songfics don't get nearly as many reviews as my chaptered stories. (But you can go read them (well, it, really) If you want to! *hinthint*)

Luv ya loads!

-Jeanne