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Mirrors Multiplied

Part Six
A Little Fighting

by Jared Ornstead

A Disclaimer left lying casually around with no one to defend it (ah, my
silky darling):

All applicable disclaimers are in force. Some have forced their way
in, others are learning the Force, while some are officers on the force.

Just to help out my little farce.

************************************************
Ranma vaulted with a double turn over a churning line of light
cannon fire, sliding between two high velocity missiles.
Whoever was in that helicopter wasn't caring about civilian
casualties. Half the shops on the street had been destroyed in its first
volley, then it had started to unleash the heavy stuff.
"Haven't you got a reliable lock *yet!*" The pilot screamed at her
sensor tech, wrestling with her controls.
"Sorry, Arisa." The tech apologized. "He moves around too swiftly.
Our tracking programs are not set up to follow anything that
unpredictable. The programmers never expected to have to track a human
able to leap buildings!"
The pilot ravished a small shopping mall with autocannon fire, using
the blasts to hide a cluster munition until it was almost to target,
then rippled off an entire rack of antipersonnel rockets for
simultaneous impact.
They missed.
"Where is that support we called for?!" The pilot screamed, dodging
a chi blast.
Six articulated spider tanks pulled off the deserted freeway and
began to skim into the battle zone, downloading tracking and targeting
information from the heavily engaged helicopter.
"Why won't this guy stay *STILL?!*" Arisa screamed, launching a
weighty tub of explosive submunitions.
Ranma waved one arm and summoned a blazing arc of energy. "Flaming
Chi Wave!!!" Using his internal energies to destroy the bomblets before
they could get close to him.
He landed on a building. "Great Lightning Trident, Attack!!!" He
cried.
Arisa nudged the helicopter's controls out of the way of the
oncoming trifold beam of energy. "And just who *is* this guy? Does he
have military grade weapons hid up his sleeves or something?"
The autocannons ran on empty.
Tech addressed pilot. "Arisa! Frame stress has reached critical!
Weapons are down to forty mark elevens and a single multicannon."
The pilot saturated the area around the fleeing martial artist with
the remaining missiles.
"Make that one multicannon." The tech corrected.
Three of the tanks pulled up in bombardment positions, while the
rest went around for flanking. The area around Ranma was soon a hail of
high velocity impact craters chewing apart stone as if it were cheese.
"Where is he? I've lost him!" Arisa screamed.
"I don't KNOW!" The tech pounded her controls. "I've never had a
good lock on him and now he's just up and disappeared!"
A scythe-like chi blast destroyed two of the spider tanks. The
remaining one fell back before a ghostly dragon form that crackled and
destroyed buildings in its wake. The cover it found was insufficient and
the third tank exploded.
"Is this guy a soldier or a special effects department?!" The pilot
bounced higher, trying to get a good angle for the last of her
ammunition. She caught a flash of red racing from one end of the trench,
and volleyed half a hundred rounds at it.
Ranma dodged into bushes and beneath a torn canopy racing in the
prop wash. It hid him from sight, and that was all that stone could do
right now.
Man, the effort it took to get to school in the morning!
Pity. He'd been looking forward to his second day. He liked his
classes.
One of the tank crewers caught a blip on the infrared where nothing
was burning. "Volley fire on my target!" The commander roared.
The last three tanks opened up with all they had, turning a shop
into flying particles and causing massive secondary explosions of gas
and water mains.
Water?
Ranma dunked himself and grabbed a strip of cloth for a kimono.
Please let them believe its just another fleeing pedestrian. She prayed.
Please let this work.
Ranko began to run.
The helicopter swooped down upon her, loudspeakers on. "That trick
hasn't worked since you were seven years old Saotome-san! You think we
Kunos don't know about your curse?"
As multicannon bursts came close enough to tear cloth from her body
Ranko reminded herself once again about that rule not to take anything
for granted this time. A fragment of exploding stone whizzed into her
chest and punctured a lung.
Oops.

The Sailor Scouts stood atop a building, trying to see more than
smoke, haze and explosions. A spider tank crawled through a nearby bank,
bringing the building down on itself with complete disregard.
Even Jupiter was nonplused.
"We're supposed to fight *that*?" She asked in wonder.
A four story armored behemoth comprising several hundred tons of
weapons and armor disengaged its jump jets and came to land through the
roof of the ruined shopping mall.
"Combat units!" It blared at ninety decibels. "Keep Saotome-san
contained until the satellite beam weapons can be brought into play!"
Sailor Moon ran screaming from the fray, the other Sailors racing
after. They would grab her and return, but even Mars wasn't eager for
this.

Ranko could think of only one way to heal that injury. She found
cover.
"Earth Power Make-Up!"
Sailor Earth emerged from the manhole cover that had given her
refuge. With skirt and hair whipping in the gale she faced the onrushing
tanks.
"For destroying the lives of innocent civilians, for the damage you
have caused to Tokyo." She was amazed herself that she could be heard
through this. "The vengeance you have sought will now be visited upon
you!
"Earth Cataclysm, Erupt!!!" She drove a fist into the ground.
The ground bucked and swayed under her blow, jumping and then
settling in a radius of miles. A spreading ring of shock washed out from
her, turning buildings and rubble into airborne particles capable of
driving through armor. The onrushing tanks, as well as new
reinforcements, had exterior armor plates melt away like soap bubbles in
a gale as the sandstorm of stone washed their substance away. The
helicopter rode the initial waves and was flung far distant instead of
being reduced to fragments.
The only thing standing around Sailor Earth was the great armored
behemoth. Its surface pitted and scarred, many of its weapons washed
away, it still brought heavy beam cannons to bear.
Earth dodged an attack that would have leveled a city block, had
there still been one there to level. The explosion backlit her and
scorched her backside.
She landed on bare earth. "For allowing yourself in injure
bystanders in your petty feud, prepare to receive your punishment!"
"Stone Spears, Rise!!" She threw a punch into the air.
Shards of stone measuring dozens of yards long sprang from the
ground under the behemoth, piercing its meter-thick defensive plating
and running the thing through as if the entire dreadnought were no more
than packing foam. One spear struck the primary energy plant and the
machine exploded in a withering blast.

A huge drop of sweat formed on Beryl's head as she watched this all
occur through her crystal ball.
"Uh, Nephrite. Are you *sure* none of you know who this new Sailor
Scout is?"
Nephrite bowed. "My queen. Even our loremasters have been able to
find nothing. There were no records of this Sailor Earth in our battles
with the Moon Kingdom."
The queen looked at him askance. "First Jadeite lost without a word,
now this new Sailor Scout appears. They're obviously related. I want you
to find out what you can. But remember to bring me energy, Nephrite."
He bowed. "Of course, my queen."

Amazingly, a reporter had survived the explosions intact. He emerged
from beneath the doorstep of what had once been a bath, still filming
with his remote-feed camera. The other Sailors landed in formation
around Sailor Earth.
"Yea! You did it!"
There were congratulations all around. Mars would have glomped Earth
but the latter pointed out the reporter.
The Scouts all disappeared.

Arisa fought her combat helicopter back into some semblance of
control. Smoke poured from one engine and a few armor plates were just
plain gone.
They were miles from the source of that blast.
"Arisa, the frame is vibrating. Can you get us back home?"
The pilot gritted her teeth. "Yes. But where did that Sailor Scout
come from!!"
The tech put a finger to her lip. "Well, we were destroying major
portions of the city."
The pilot blinked in total surprise. "Oh. I guess you're right. They
*do* respond to that sort of disturbance, don't they?" She eyed her
readouts. "Weapons gone, frame stressed, an engine lost and major fuel
leaks. I guess we can't go back to the fight now, can we?"
The tech grimaced in fear. "Go *back*? What would you want to do
that for?"
Arisa stuck her nose in the air. "We failed to eliminate the target.
Lady Kuno will not be pleased with us."
"But how were we to know that he could evade missiles like that?
It's not our fault that the tracking software couldn't follow him!" The
tech blinked and began to grin. "Hey! We got that whole fight on record!
We'll be able to modify the targeting system to adjust to his
movements!"
A major portion of her board shorted out, lights going dark and
instruments smoking.
"What was that?" Arisa asked, controlling the copter through sheer
force of will.
The tech hung her head. "The combat recorder. All information is
lost." She pivoted in her seat and activated a different instrument. A
woman's face appeared on the radar screen.
"Lady Akiko," the tech addressed the matron of the Kuno family. "We
have lost Saotome-san. Our helicopter is heavily damaged and we can no
longer continue the chase. We are very, very sorry. Do you have better
news from the rest of the assault group?" She asked hopefully.
The mother of Tatewaki Kuno remained calm. "Our tanks last report
was of the appearance of a Sailor Scout. Satellites caught our vehicles
being destroyed. You may come back to base. There will be other
opportunities."

Ranma and the group of girls who were oft times Scouts were walking
through the park together.
"Pity about them canceling school today."
"Well, next time try to avoid causing a national emergency, Ranma."
Mina said it with a smile.
"Hey, you take on a military assault team with your arms full of
school books and see how *you* do. Look, I got a cannon hole through my
history text."
Serena laughed.
"You're lucky it's not your head." Lita advised. "I've never seen
anyone go through what half you have and live."
He shrugged. "Someday maybe you'll have to. Man, I wish they hadn't
gotten my *history* text. The math doesn't change much, and I speak
better English than our teacher, but the history is different every
time."
Amy couldn't help but heft her own books in approval. "Maybe we
should have a study session then. I can tutor you on our history if
you'll help me with the math."
"Hey!" Lita agreed. "Can you help me with gymnastics, too? I have
some moves I've got to learn and I can't *imagine* you not knowing
them."
Serena tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and fell face first in
some bushes, her legs kicking feebly in the air.
They hauled her out, bawling.
"Serena, your such a klutz!" Rae reproved the girl.
"She's just having a late growth spurt." Ranma addressed her kindly.
"Anybody can be clumsy when their arms and their legs are a slightly
different length each day. Heck, *I* trip over my feet when I'm growing
like that. Although, I admit, I don't think I'm *that* bad."
He shrugged. "She's starving and clumsy and tired. All indications
of someone who's growing too fast. She'll get over it."
Serena stopped crying, amazed to find an explanation for once. The
others grew quiet as well, thinking how simple an answer they'd been
given.
"Could that really be what's wrong with her?" Rae asked.
"Sure, some of the most graceful people I know fell over their own
feet as kids. They learned hard to compensate, and when they stopped
growing so much they'd earned that little extra poise. Nature is full of
little quirks like that."
They digested this in silence.
"But you're graceful." The way Mina said it made it a question.
He nodded. "Yes. And there's nothing stopping you from being, too.
You just have to train for it."
"Will you train us?" All the girls asked simultaneously, pleading in
their eyes.

Half a dozen Amazons dropped down to the path before them. Ranma
already had a defensive move completed before he'd read enough of their
stance to know that they weren't there to threaten him.
He returned to ready position.
"I take it we are going to talk before killing each other this
time?" He addressed the familiar withered woman at their head.
"Yes, mighty one. I would have a word with you, if I may?"
"If I might invoke the peace-law. No feuds at public gatherings, no
fighting save for challenges."
He held himself conspicuously relaxed as he said it, yet as ready
for action as ever. His stance was a pose, but a polite one and the
Amazons read it as such. They seated themselves a safe distance away
when their matron accepted the terms.
"We heard tales of a man possessing knowledge of secret Amazon
techniques. We came to investigate, and found the culprit. But you
obviously know more of our ways than just a few moves." The crone
observed.
A mystery solved.
Ranma's face brightened. "Oh. Yes, I see. You can't have a
grandmaster of Wushuu Amazonian Kung Fu running around unidentified, can
you?" His features darkened. "Hey, wait a moment. You're supposed to be
trying to kill me. The only reason you *wouldn't* be is if..."
His voice trailed off.
He held up a finger. "Let me get this straight. You, bearer of the
matriarch's staff, are leading a group of Amazon women, tournament
winners by the looks of them, in a distant land. Since there has been no
time for this group to have assembled and come after me from China, this
has to be a husband hunting expedition. You were traveling in search of
martial artists able to defeat these girls and marry into the tribe."
"Certainly, but as you no doubt know we are leery of outsiders using
our special techniques. While we were challenging dojos in the area we
came to hear of your use of the Chestnut Fist and the Splitting Cat
Hairs, two of our most secret moves. We were understandably upset by a
non-Amazon having them. And our law requires that those who do be dealt
with."
"Yes, great grandmother. I remember you teaching me that law."
Her eyes bulged.
He blushed. "Did I say that? Well, I guess there's no retracting it.
Yes, great grandmother, there is no need for you to worry. I will not
pass on our techniques to those who are not of the tribe."
Cologne's face grew calculating. "I have seen you in battle, and
address you with respect accordingly. You are indeed a mighty warrior.
But who are you to claim kinship with me?"
All eyes were on Ranma. He suddenly wished he were on more friendly
ground. "History has been altered, honored elder, but let it suffice
that there was a time when I entered your village not as an outsider."
Her eyes narrowed. "I would have an explanation of that."
He looked around, no strangers in sight. The Amazons were relaxed,
and they would likely sense any others who came close. He pulled out the
bracelet.
"I think you recognize this, great grandmother. For you are the one
who taught me what I know of it." He replaced it in his pocket. "Through
its use I have entered your village many times as friend, ally, or
member." He smiled at the memory. "A fact which annoyed many of the
girls no end as, from their perspective, this know-nothing male suddenly
acquired the ability to best all of them."
He'd found amusement in that over and over again. Fortunately a
tribe member could fight another without invoking either kiss of death
or marriage. They'd never get any practice otherwise.
He went on. "But even without the ring, in my very first life, I
defeated Shampoo. And from that time you called me son in law."
Cologne's smile showed warmth. "Well, that *does* make our task
easier. You see, after witnessing your last battle none of us were very
eager to fight you. In my eyes you could likely slay half our tribe
before we eventually killed you. Yet our law requires that no outsider
know our secrets and live. But now we have a solution. We'll have the
challenge fight this very moment. And should you defeat Shampoo again
you will marry her and rejoin our tribe."
Ranma dropped his face into his hands.
Mina could swear she heard him ask. "What *is* it with me?"
He raised his face to her. "Great grandmother, there are..." He did
a quick count. "At present five, no six, women that I am engaged to."
"Why the uncertain count, son in law?"
"It varies depending on whom you ask. My mother counts one as
engaged that neither the girl, nor myself, consented to. And two of the
others have only a temporary claim." He rolled his eyes. "So far."
The girls were all seated on the grass, eating snacks and watching
them avidly. Ranma cocked his eyebrow at them.
Mina laughed. "Don't mind us. We're just watching our favorite soap
opera."
There was a forest of giggling.
"Just try not to get yourself engaged *too* much, husband dear." Rae
teased, crossing her legs seductively. "We can't have you getting all
worn out."
This encouraged some very frank and wicked speculation among the
girls. Ranma found himself getting as red as his shirt.
Shampoo came forward, her bonbori held at the ready.
Ranma considered a thousand different ways of defeating her, and all
four ways of trying to weasel out of this. There really *was* that law
about killing the outsider who knows Amazon secrets, and there were only
two ways of not being an outsider. Marry in, or be born a member.
And Cologne had just shown how she felt the matter should end.
But that wasn't even the main point. Shampoo was a warrior, and
there was an almost unique blend of circumstance and unresponsiveness
required to win her love and admiration. Merely beating her would win
the body, but the heart gave itself or it was never to be had. He'd have
never believed, just from his first life, just how *hard* it was to win
Shampoo's affection.
With Ukyo, he'd had dozens of lives meeting her, falling in love,
becoming friends, down to the point where he'd "met" her so many times
that he could see her for the first time and be best friends in an hour.
He knew *all* her buttons and genuinely liked her.
Then there'd been that life where he'd been married to her and blown
that. He was still working off penance.
With Rae, well, Rae was Rae. She was charming, sociable, witty and
fun. And she was one of the few people he'd met who'd seen, ever so
slightly, into the memories hidden behind his eyes. Plus there was the
fact that, down in her soul, she was alot like Ukyo. That made him love
them both all the more.
Shampoo. He'd lived in her village, followed her ways, but he'd
never really learned how she worked. On the surface she seemed totally
simple, underneath that she was horribly complex. The underlying reason
why Mousse had never won her out of lifetimes of trying.
And Ranma had never figured her out.
He had no wish to be married to someone who would not love him.
She thrust a bonbori toward his face, he dove under it and behind
her shouting. "Saotome School of Martial Arts Final Technique... Run
Away!!!"
He vanished over the horizon.
Shampoo blinked a couple of times at her arm frozen in mid thrust.
Then she got *really* mad.

The aftermath of the giant armored battle faded from the enormous
viewscreen hung in a revoltingly ugly throne chamber. On a throne
bearing a good resemblance to petrified intestines a creature lounged.
The creature's left half was one hundred percent artificial. A
complete cyborg replacement for battle damage suffered eons ago. The
creature's right half was a mix of tissue, battle armor, and cyborg
enhancements.
He laughed.
"Amazing, dear sister. The humans of this world are quite
aggressive." He laughed again. "They should make good hunting."
Cross stood next to her brother. Like Chaos, one side of her body
was entirely machine. But, blending with the battle armor she wore on
her left, she retained a more human appearance. Unlike her brother, a
creature of spikes and protrusions. He reveled in the alienness of his
body. She would have killed anyone to dare to suggest that there was
enough still human left in her to care about vanity. But then, she would
probably kill you anyway, seeing as how that's what she got her kicks
off of. So it made little enough of a difference.
"They should be amusing, don't you think?" Chaos asked his sister.
She tossed her hair, grinning wickedly. "I have chosen my first
target."
"Oh? Don't kill it too soon. Make it scream a bit. We should enjoy
ourselves before blowing this planet back into so much dust."
On the screen now stood revealed three women working happily in a
kitchen while wild deer and songbirds played around them.

Ranma stopped well outside of danger's range and, amazingly, in
front of a restaurant run by someone who didn't want to marry him.
It was Akie's, a small family restaurant owned by Kuno's mother.
That fact didn't alter his appetite one bit, the Saotome stomach being
one of the few things that even a wish couldn't change. Besides, having
people attempt to kill him at meals was both entertaining and fun.
He went inside.
The restaurant was packed, with a line waiting for seats
unacceptably long. So Ranma grabbed a menu from the server's kiosk and
dropped himself into a booth occupied by two ladies who were merely
nursing a cup of coffee between them.
"'Hey, sorry to drop in on you like this..."
Both women were shivering in their seats with grimaces of fear. In
fact they looked so disconcerted that he wondered for a minute if he'd
somehow regained that purple face and horns he'd worked so hard to get
rid of a dozen realities back.
"Saotome-san!" One of them babbled.
Ranma recognized the voice. "Well, I'll be. From the copter, right?
Well, don't worry. You're just after me `cause you're *paid* to do it
and I never kill people like that off-duty. Hey, why just the cup of
coffee? Aren't you two hungry?"
They really did have iron nerves and it showed in how swiftly they
lost their cowering.
"Lady Akiko canceled our bonuses and seized most of our savings in
retribution for... for this morning." The tech answered.
Ranma shrugged, sliding into the booth. "Okay, that explains that.
Well I'm starved, and I hate to eat alone. Here." He called the waitress
over to them, holding open his menu.
"We'll have everything from here," he traced a long line. "To here.
Triple helpings." He handed her a wad of bills and the menu.
The waitress wandered away like a wooden automaton, recovering her
senses somewhat near the kitchen.
Arisa, the pilot, slapped her hands on the table and made as if to
stand up. "How DARE you attempt to bribe us? And how dare you face us in
Lady Akiko's own restaurant?"
Ranma waved her down lazily. "Because I'm hungry, and so are you. If
you attempt to kill me during the fish sticks, that's fine. I just want
to get a little rice and cheese under my belt."
The pilot sank back down into her seat, disbelieving.
Ranma went on. "Anyway, it doesn't matter to me. I'm *not* trying to
bribe you. I just got out of another fight and I'm honestly feeling
hungry. Try to slip a knife in my ribs during dessert if you like, but
I'm starved. Besides, it's a bit refreshing to eat with someone who
doesn't want to marry me. I get to forget worrying about having a hammer
stuck in my skull if I say something wrong."
"Gotcha!" A little goddess squealed, slamming her mallet into his
head. Ranma disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Skuld wiped her brow. "Wow! I haven't had a *recurring* bug like
that in a long time." Her face screwed up a bit. "Hmm, maybe Belldandy
knows something about it. I really should have responded to her last
call."
The goddess walked off, leaving two terrified ladies behind.

*****

Lightning split the air and with a falling scream a man dropped into
the Tendo yard.
Ranma looked out of the bushes around himself. Nice house, well
maintained, Kasumi out hanging wash. Kasumi saw him.
"Why hello, Ranma. Did you enjoy your trip with your friend?"
Ranma hedged, uncertain where he was. "I forgot something and had to
come back for it. Can you remember what we were saying as we left?"
Kasumi frowned, looking slightly unsettled. "No, it was all very
confusing. You said something about coming home. But it was all after
some argument, and you didn't want to live here anymore. It had
something to do with Ukyo, I think. Did you change your mind? Are you
still going to be living with us?"
Kasumi pled with her eyes that he would say something that would
make it all better.
Ranma wished he had some idea of what he'd done wrong. Standard
copout #1, he went to Kasumi and addressed her with genuine caring.
"Kasumi, what would you want me to do?"
Relief flooded her, her brightness doubled. With a smile she said.
"Well, if you're ready, I'm sure everyone would be pleased if you would
go in and talk with them."
Ranma smiled. Standard Kasumi. It made him feel good just being near
her. He nodded and went in, still wondering what blowup it was he was
going to be fixing.

The Tendo living room was packed. Soun and Genma were bawling,
Nabiki was in the act of comforting Akane, and didn't look too good
herself. Shampoo and Ukyo were like twin book ends, watching Cologne
speaking with Belldandy.
Belldandy?
Ranma's eyes bulged at the goddess. He cleared his throat. There was
instant silence as the room turned toward him.
"Uh, did I miss something?"
He was glomped by a handful young girls.
"Ranma NEVER leave Shampoo again!" The buxom Amazon cried. Ukyo
glomped onto his chest.
"How DARE you leave just after proposing to me?"
"Ranma! I'm so *glad* you came back!"
"It's bad policy to go leaving us fiances behind, Ranma."
The room stopped to stare at Nabiki, glomped onto Ranma's left arm.
She grinned unabashedly and held on, tilting her head. "Well, that *was*
part of the deal with the tango thing. I'm one of the brides." She sang
triumphantly.
Ranma was *very* unused to returning to any reality that he had
left, but he was beginning to get a clue.
Belldandy came to his rescue. "Oh, Ranma. Something must have gone
wrong. Didn't your friend just carry you back to your home universe?"
Ranma shrugged those parts of his body without females hanging on
them. "Sure. I spent most of a day there. Look, this has really got me
confused, and I figure you can answer this. Which universe is this?"
Belldandy excused herself and made a telephone call. She came back
with a slightly less puzzled expression.
"This is your universe of origin, Ranma. But it is no longer your
home dimension. That place needs you. I just sent a call to my father,
and he has been speaking to my double on the other world. Things will
get sorted out."
Ranma's eyes rolled. "Okay, whatever. Look, my brain just shorted
out. Can you *please* just explain this so I can't mess up this time?"
Belldandy shook her head. "But I think I know someone who can." She
went and made another telephone call.
"Where are you calling?" Akane asked, losing her grip on Ranma.
"Heaven." Came Belldandy's simple reply.
Nabiki's eyes danced with the possibilities of what the redial
button could do for her.
"Can you come at once?" Belldandy asked into the phone. She hung up,
and moments later the dead TV sprang to life, allowing a shapely pair of
bronze legs to exit the set, followed later by the rest of the goddess.
Urd stepped into their midst.
She leaned into Ranma over his fiances. "Well, if this isn't the
one. As a goddess of love I'm *very* disappointed in you, Ranma. Take
*advantage* of your situation." She grabbed his hand and stuck it down
the front of Shampoo's shirt. "Like this."
"Urd!" Belldandy called, reprovingly. Her hands on her hips.
The elder goddess flinched, releasing her grip. Ranma's hand darted
out of the silky confines as fast as it was able without leaving
friction burns.
"Oh, alright." Urd backed off a bit, not failing to notice the
amusing reaction to her ploy. "Well, in plain and simple terms, Saotome.
And remember this is history from *your* viewpoint, a timeline that
exists only for you. You started in *this* world, born of Nodoka and
Genma Saotome. You grew to sixteen years of age with all the trials and
things you remember from your very first life, because this *was* your
very first life. Then, a few days ago our time, ages for you, you got
ahold of a broken magic mirror that was once used to travel through
time. Your father thought that it would be a cheap way of traveling to
China, where you could reverse your curse. Unfortunately, you forgot
that it was a *broken* mirror."
She tossed a lock of white hair out of her eyes. "Instead of a free
trip to China you got flung into another dimension. There you robbed
Happosai of... a certain item, and lived a little over three hundred
lives. In fact, you worked yourself so deeply into that universe,
rewriting its history so many times, that not having you there is
*bound* to cause problems."
Genma was stunned. "I remember stealing the mirror. The rest of it?
I'd thought the mirror itself was just a bad dream."
Urd looked patronizingly at him over her shoulder. "You weren't
*supposed* to remember it, except as a dream. The... item, Ranma
acquired was for him alone." Her voice lowered. "Things like that
usually are."
"Anyway," she got back to the main topic of conversation. "After
having several hundred lives there you eventually ran afoul of our
youngest sister's double in that world. It was easy enough for her to
tell you weren't from that world, so she `debugged' you, sending you
back here, to your world of origin. One of your friends came and rescued
you not half an hour ago, and now you're back. Probably because Skuld
has *still* not figured out that debugging you doesn't do her universe a
bit of good."
Ranma shook himself, dislodging females. "So I'm actually from this
place?" He shook his head and sat down. "Sorry. Believe me when I say
that it's easier to deal with aliens or Kasumi having a machinegun than
to finally come home."
Belldandy shook her head sorrowfully. "Not home, Ranma. This place
is not home to you anymore. You are needed there now."
Urd came up behind Ranma, slipping his hand onto Ukyo's round
bottom. "Yeah, lover boy. You have *two* universes now. This is the one
you came from, and the one you spent so long enjoying is your home. Come
back and visit us anytime."
Ranma jerked his hand back, but Nabiki was already assisting Urd in
placing his other on one of her own feminine areas.
Ranma stuck himself to the ceiling and began crawling to the nearest
adjacent exit, shivering.
Akane blazed at her sister. "You don't have to SEDUCE him, Nabiki!"
The elder Tendo daughter was unperturbed. "Why? Because *you* never
do? My *dear* Akane, there are ways to gain a husband without killing
him."
Kasumi was wandering in the door that Ranma was exiting through, a
basket of wash in her arms. "Nabiki, you *know* it's wrong to do that
before marriage! Wait until he proposes. It's not right to just go ahead
with those things."
Urd smirked. "A *very* pretty speech, my dear. But perhaps you
should know. In his other universe Ranma has just as many fiances, but
the woman he's about to marry is *you*."
Kasumi dropped her basket in surprise.
Ranma lost his hold and fell on top of her, arms and legs straddling
her like an oil rig. They flashed to sitting positions, their backs to
each other.
"Oh." Kasumi whispered, blushing a delicate tinge of strawberry.
Ranma lowered his eyes to the floor. "We got to the Tendo house with
Nabiki, my mom and I. We were going to talk over some things. Stuff like
my blood feud with Kuno. Anyway, the usual kind of stuff happened. You
didn't know my family, and so you thought that me and my mother showing
up with Nabiki meant I was her boyfriend, and figured that you'd set out
the formal tea things just in case. I don't know *what* happened with
Akane, but she started to faint on the stairs. I thought she was sick.
So I went into the kitchen to tell you and we slipped in some oil. Then
your dad walked in on us to see the formal tea things set out and you
and I in a pile on the floor.
"He went to call all his friends to tell them about us getting
engaged."
"Oh." Kasumi repeated, fidgeting shyly.
Ukyo was giggling, shaking her head. "Wherever you go, whatever you
do, you're still Ranma." She sobered. "Hey, what was that the other me
said about you proposing to *her*?"
Ranma raised his face to her. "The way my mother explained it to me
was that I had direct descent through one of the major samurai lines.
And because of that I could marry as many women as I wanted, or as I had
to. She even arranged with Mr. Tendo to engage me to all three of the
Tendo girls. Then I ran into Kasumi in the market, and people tried to
kill me, and I ended up saving her, and taking her home, and well... The
wedding day hasn't arrived yet but she have already moved her things out
of her father's house and has come to live with my family."
Kasumi found her hands *very* interesting. She studied them.
Nabiki wondered what kind of hell her double must be living in.
Without Kasumi the Tendo home must be a wreck.
Ranma eyed Ukyo and Shampoo with longing in his eyes. "That's one
reason why I want to go home so badly. Because in this world I couldn't
marry *anyone* without breaking a dozen hearts."
He sighed.
"Though it isn't *that* easy. That Cologne let me challenge the
other Shampoo. But she doesn't love me there." He choked up, looking at
the Amazon. "I've lived so many lives in your village, Shampoo, but I've
never figured out *why* it is you love me."
Shampoo glomped onto him in an instant. "Is alright, husband. Wife
love you now!"
Ranma laughed with relief. "Yes, Shampoo. You do." He kissed her.
And was promptly punted into low orbit by Akane.

Ranma had a few minutes to ponder the scenery as he watched the
miles pass beneath him. Falling a dozen stories he came to land with a
crash in a park. The force of his impact broke a small grove of trees
apart and tossed weighty logs about.
Then it began to rain.
Bruised, battered, and a bit dazed Ranko pulled herself out from the
mess. Then the rest of the grove crashed apart around her in a titanic
turmoil of destruction.

"Flame Sniper!" Mars released a arrow of fire toward her enemy.
Her opponent, just finishing up with a devastating blast of her own,
nearly took the attack fully. A Daimon guarding her leader as she coaxed
the heart from the chest of a helpless Lita. Sailor Mercury moved up to
make her attack but was tripped up at the last moment.
The Daimon chose that moment to relaunch her attack at the cluster
of them. A wave of destruction crashed through, nearly finishing three
scouts with that one blast, the attack washing over the untended grove
her first strike had blown to ruins.

Ranko saw it coming. Trapped under a log as she was there was no way
to evade it, so she called out her power phrase, hoping like anything
that her own transformation energies would dim the blast.
Sailor Earth spun in a vortex of energies, the onrushing wall of
energy parting, then crashing against her transformation sequence. The
additional power nearly killed her, but her pen altered and soaked up
the extra energy, using it to change itself in synch with the other
transformation pens it could sense around it.
Lightning washed over Earth's chest as flashes of blue flame blazed
on her limbs. She spun as a tidal wave swirled around her feet,
culminating in a waterspout that consumed her, leaving her standing on
the lawn in full Sailor costume.
Then the backlash of the modified transformation created an
explosion that leveled the area.
Blackened, fried, and with crispy red hair Sailor Earth stood in a
crater around the edge of which stood the stunned combatants.

Ranko could fight wounded, a skill that lapped over to her identity
as Sailor Earth. She quickly identified those fighting. Four Sailors and
one meanie nasty plus minion. Chi signatures on the Scouts indicated
that they were good guys.
Lita was on the ground, unconcious. Also, Sailors Uranus and Neptune
were watching from the bushes, helping neither side. But the primary bad
woman had dodged back from the helpless Lita.
Before the others could react Sailor Earth summoned forth her staff
and raised it toward the heavens.
"Crystal Spears, Explosion!"
Underneath the opposing team the ground erupted in a thousand shards
of razor sharp crystal, each springing hundreds of feet out of the
ground in a lethal bouquet of colorful splinters.
The results of what this did to those caught in it were too gory to
describe. The fight was over, the enemy dead. Earth leaned against her
staff, her burned skin cracking and blood pouring out in rivulets.
"Medic." Earth cried out, and then collapsed.
Uranus jumped out of the bushes, toward the crystal heart that had
been torn from Lita's bosom. "Hold it!" Sailor Moon cried, raising the
imperium crystal.
"Moon Crystal Healing!"
A short animation sequence later Sailor Earth was back on her feet,
showing few if any marks of damage. She started to check her limbs, but
noticed that Uranus was striking down Venus, who had been guarding
Lita's crystal heart.
Neptune attacked Mars to provide a distraction.
Earth got mad.
A blazing arc of chi energy separated the Outer and Inner Scouts,
Earth then appearing in the middle, facing the two Outer ones.
"Explain yourselves or face annihilation. Without her heart Lita
will die, why do you seek to take it by force?"
Uranus glowered. "If she dies, she dies. That doesn't concern us."
Neptune made a dash for the heart.
"Tornado Kick!!!" Earth struck Neptune in the side with enough force
to send her flying across the park, then pivoted to intercept the racing
Uranus, catching her ankle in a hold and flinging her against a boulder
face.
Earth addressed the Inner Scouts without facing them. "Mars,
covering fire. Venus, get Lita's heart back to her. Mercury, scan for
Neptune, she'll be coming back. Sailor Moon, get the others out of here.
My attacks aren't exactly pleasant and I wouldn't like to hurt any of
you if I have to use them. Now Uranus, for the last time, explain your
actions or face the second most powerful Scout."
Uranus rose, wiping blood from her lips. "Second?"
Earth smiled grimly. "Only the second. But because I don't destroy
the whole world when I get mad I have *much* more freedom."
"Deep Submerge!" Neptune cried out from behind. Earth leaped above
it, turning to offer her own brand of attack.
"Crystal Spears...Ooof!!!"
Uranus had hit her with a powerful knee strike, then pulled out her
sword to put down the offending Scout. Earth deflected the blow with the
back of her hand and jammed a fist into her attacker's belly.
Venus had finished restoring Lita's heart to her, and the Inner
Scouts formed up.
"Why do you fight against us?" Mercury questioned, obviously
concerned.
"Please don't hurt them!" Moon cried.
Earth and Uranus landed facing each other, with Neptune hanging
back, unsure now that the crystal heart was unavailable.
"I don't relish killing potential allies, Uranus. But I don't like
seeing my friends endangered either. Tell me what's up so we can work
together, if we can."
Uranus was furious. "I *don't* have to explain myself to you, Earth.
And nothing can be allowed to stand in our way."
"Don't make me kill you, Uranus. I'd grieve for whole minutes."
"Uranus, I think we should go. The heart isn't here anymore. And it
might not have been a talisman."
Uranus was in a rage. "And now we'll never *know* will we? Don't you
see! She'll stop us at every turn. She can't be allowed to keep on
interfering like this!"
Reluctantly, Neptune nodded and joined Uranus, hefting her staff.
There was honest regret in Earth's eyes. "You aren't leaving me any
way out of this. I can't let you kill the Inner Sailors."
Twin attack phrases were called out and a blue and yellow ball of
energy hurtled toward Earth. She dodged it effortlessly.
"Crystal Spears, Explosion!"
"World Shaking!"
The spears sprang from the ground, only to be shattered apart into
harmless dust as they rose to intercept the two Outer Scouts.
"Deep Submerge!"
"Flame Sniper!"
Mars' arrow of fire failed to completely dissipate the onrushing
attack of water, but it cut it down to negligible power.
The five Inner Scouts formed up behind the embattled Earth.
"Hold it, you three." Sailor Moon demanded. "We aren't here to fight
each other. We've got... Eeek!" She dodged out of the way of a world
shaking.
A rose stuck itself in the ground at Uranus' feet. "There are two
things that the pure heart will always deny itself." Tuxedo Mask
announced from the top of a stone monument. "One is callousness toward
the pain of others, and the second is to betray your friends. Beware,
Outer Scouts, for I see in your actions that which would make you
enemies of Justice."
Uranus ground her teeth. Neptune looked to her for guidance.
"The others don't matter. It's Earth who could stop us." Uranus
hissed. Neptune nodded, stepping aside as if to speak to Tuxedo Mask.
Uranus used the movement to mask a swift attack against Earth, diving
for her throat with her sword.
Earth thrust both her own fists forward like the arms of a giant
tuning fork.
"Earth Cataclysm, Wave!!!"
Huge energy built up around her arms, then blasted forward with
shocking force, burning effortlessly through hills, skyscrapers, even
mountainsides that were in its way, turning a huge wedge of the
countryside into a blackened ruin.
Uranus lay gulping under the path of the energy beam, having barely
escaped with her life. She'd called upon every ounce and gram of her
super abilities not to be hit by that attack.
Earth lowered her arms.
"Next time Uranus, I won't aim to miss. Don't think I didn't know
you could get under that. Now, you will *not* endanger any of the Inner
Scouts, their allies or their friends, or I will *find* you. This is
*my* planet, you insolent wench, and if you think you can hide from me
on it you can think again."
She held a fist blazing with energy inches from the other Scout's
face. "The Inner Scouts are under *my* protection. And if *any* harm
comes upon them at all, from you or from their enemies, there will be a
reckoning between us. Now am I making myself absolutely clear?"
Uranus nodded.
Earth dropped the energy fist and turned to face Neptune. "You're
not a bad sort, Neptune. Try working together with the Inner Scouts
sometime, you might like it. Remember that I didn't seek this fight, and
gave you every opportunity to explain. My only cause against you came
from the danger you exposed my friends to. Don't harm them and I'll
never have conflict with you again."
Earth started to walk away.
"Wait!" Tuxedo Mask called. "Who are you?"
Blue Iczelion appeared, grabbed Sailor Earth, and vanished just as
fast.

*****
Universe B, Home Universe

Ranma was returned to his home in the Saotome estate. Rae and Ucchan
began to discuss how to better defend him in the future, while Belldandy
took him aside for some more instruction.

Nephrite warped in, concealing himself in bushes. So! The stars had
been right, here *was* one who was heavily tainted with destiny. Then he
caught a look at the woman at his side and froze solid, using every
scrap of his energy to hide himself.
A goddess! Who would have known? How he would *love* to steal her
energy for the negaverse. But it was not something to be gone about
casually, first there was the matter of that capable-looking warrior she
was speaking to, the one who had originally originally attracted
Nephrite's attention.
The boy's energy would be nothing compared to that of a goddess, but
destiny does not taint men without reason. It was more than likely the
young man could put up quite a fight, even against a negaverse general.
Therefore, the boy would have to be disposed of quickly. Fighting a
goddess would be possible, but Nephrite did not need outside
distractions.
Nephrite extended his own senses ever so subtly. Ha! The boy had a
flaw a mile wide. Reality rippled around him, it would be the simplest
thing to toss him into another universe. Once tossed he would cease to
be a concern to anyone.
Nephrite paused, reconsidering. Jadeite had continually come up with
one good plan after another, but had continually been foiled. Nephrite
had no idea of the boy's abilities, and it would be uncomfortable if he
was able to return from whatever universe he threw him.
Then he sensed another object. The lad was carrying a Destiny Ring!
Nephrite smiled. The ring was at low power, but he could feed it just a
trickle of energy and have it activate right after the universe jump.
That way the boy would be too busy dealing with whatever the effects of
the random wish were to return immediately.

Nephrite sprang from concealment, leveling his crystal at the
couple.
"Ranma, I want to apologize. And I need to warn you about..."
Belldandy cried out in astonishment.
"Goodbye boy!" Nephrite shouted, and a beam of black energy swiped
through where Ranma had been, wiping him from the face of existence.
Rae and Ukyo came running up. "Ran-chan!" They chorused.
Kasumi stopped where she stood, a plate of cookies in her arms. "Oh,
my."
Nephrite laughed, hanging in the air. "Your energy is MINE!
Aaarrggghhh!"
His chest disappeared in a fountain of blood, his organs reduced to
an instant hash. Nodoka dropped her military-grade, over the shoulder
gauss rifle and ran over to where the girls were congregating.
"You *must* get him back!" Belldandy was shouting, her body
shuddering with fright and tears.
Ukyo clenched her fists helplessly. "I can't! The portal has already
closed!" The tremor in her voice expressing greater pain than if she'd
screamed the words.

*****
Random Universe

Ranma came to looking down the length of an enormous table, he'd
estimate about thirty feet long and twenty wide. The whole room was
gigantic in proportion, but he had no time to digest it, as a twenty
foot woman entered bearing a cake.
On the cake were two candles.
Ranma swiftly checked himself. He was tied in a chair, elevated on
long legs to reach the level of the table, on his chest was a bib.
"Gluklich geburtstag, Ranma!" The giant Nodoka beamed at him.
Ranma sniffled. Another one of *those* realities. But he was nothing
if not able to adapt. Clapping his diminutive hands together he
responded. "Bitte, bitte, meine Mutti. Wieviel yahren habe ich?"
Nodoka dropped her cake in surprise.

Nodoka was STUNNED. Her son had replied! She had only been taking
the German class for two weeks. It had seemed charming and harmless to
greet him `happy birthday' in her faltering Deutsch.
He had replied.
Ranma's first words had been in German.
And he'd spoken them tolerably well. Two years old and not a word of
his native Japanese, and his first words were a complete sentence...
...in German.
Two complete sentences.
Nodoka turned to her husband. "Keiichi, have *you* ever spoken
German with Ranma before?"
Keiichi shook his head. "I don't speak a word of it honey."
Both turned back to view their son, who wasn't even squirming in his
high chair.
Ranma looked back at them.
He finished his birthday meal deftly and adroitly, wielding his
spoon with dexterity and skill. He didn't even spill or leave a
noticeable mess. He failed to pull the cap off his safety cup, drop food
over the side, splash things, or even get a spot on his bib.
Nodoka became frantic with worry.
Ranma looked up from where he had finished. Switching to Japanese he
asked. "Mommy, may I be excused? I'm done now."

Ranma found himself in a doctor's office before he could blink.
He squirmed around in his mother's lap until he could grab a
magazine. Then he pulled it open in front of him and began to read.
Nodoka noticed. Squirming was normal, squirming was natural,
comfortable, it soothed her. Then she noticed him looking at a medical
journal.
Nodoka laughed, and tried to substitute a children's book. "Here,
Ranma. You'll like the pictures in this one better."
Ranma shook his little head. "No mommy, I've already read that one."

Her eyelids twitched, but she brushed it off. "Silly Ranma, don't
you want to read to mommy?" It was a harmless game. Allow a child to
pretend to read by looking at the pictures and making up a story. It was
something her mother had done with her.
Ranma looked up at his mother, then squirmed into a more comfortable
sitting position. Taking the book he read.
"Fox in Socks, by Dr. Seuss."
Nodoka passed out somewhere in the third tongue twister, perfectly
executed by her son who had never spoken until that day.

Bemused and befuddled, Ranma's mother departed the next day, leaving
with her medical group for a European tour and instructional trip.
Keiichi, his dad, was also going out of town on the racing circuit.
They left him in the care of his godfather, Genma.
At the train station where Ranma said goodbye to his father, Keiichi
pressed an envelope full on bills on Genma, and made him promise to take
good care of Ranma until he got back.
Genma vanished with the cash before the train was even fully pulled
out of the station.
Ranma sighed, and the two year old began his journey home. Right now
Genma would be so ecstatic at having so much money that he would
immediately go out and get drunk, not even noticing he'd forgotten the
little child he was supposed to be taking care of.
Ranma got home and let himself in by a window. He sat down with a
pen and notepad and began to calculate.
First he looked over the paid bills, neatly filed by his father.
Projecting that over the months they'd both be gone, and estimating from
that how much cash he'd given Genma.
Then he did a quick cost calculation, judging how much sake and
gambling that would buy Genma, at a slightly better brand than he
usually bought (to celebrate) and subtracting 40% for incidentals. Like
fines, overtipping, getting mugged when he was too drunk to defend
himself, and general recklessness.
Ranma looked at the final figure. It was time. This number was how
long it would take Genma to spend himself broke, realize that he had
wasted everything, and come back to the house. At first he would tell
himself it was to take care of the boy, but then he would ask himself
how he would do that without money, then he would see the TV set. Genma
would then strip the house of everything he could sell, pawn or trade,
all the while telling himself how the boy's parents would excuse him,
once he had come to his senses and done his responsibility.
But once sold that would look like an *awful* lot of money. Surely
the boy wouldn't be *that* hard to take care of. Genma would be sure he
could spare a *little* of that, and besides he needed to plan what to
do, and he always planned best when he'd had a little something.
And that would be the end of that fortune.
Ranma did the figures, estimating a fairly bad price for all the
items Genma would think to steal, and did the math again.
Because at the end of that time Genma would come back again and the
next thing to be sold would be either Ranma, or the house.
Or both.
Ranma looked at his figures. It didn't take long to spend alot of
money, the only peace it gave him was the time it would take Genma to
recover from all that booze.
It still wasn't much time.
Two year old Ranma neatly put away the bills. Then he calmly and
methodically went through the house. He searched in and around all the
furniture, went through the vacuum cleaner bag, looked through all the
drawers and cupboards. In the end he had everything tidy and neat, but
more importantly he had acquired a decent pile of loose change.
It wasn't nearly enough.
Ranma sat on a pile of cushions and pondered. His parents had left
phone numbers, addresses, contact points and emergency numbers. But
they'd left it all with Genma.
So what could Ranma do?
He was too young to get a job, not even 5 yen coins from pulling
weeds in people's lawns. People would ask where his parents were, and
when he couldn't produce any they would turn him over to some government
officer, who would contact the boy's local guardian, who happened to be
Genma. Genma would be *just* sober enough (or able to fake it) to
retrieve him, think about how much trouble the boy could be, and in a
fit of drunken logic Ranma would be parceled off to the nearest and most
convenient buyer.
A job was too risky a scheme to even contemplate.
Ranma thought seriously. Whom could he contact? Ukyo and her father
could run a restaurant. They could support him and her dad could defend
him. But could he even find them? And would they even listen? He didn't
even know them here. They wasn't supposed to meet for another four
years.
Could Kodachi or Kuno help him? No, their family had money, but
their father was almost as bad as Genma. They'd let him in, but Ranma
would just be added to the abuse list. Abuse that would eventually
shatter the childrens' minds.
Whom did that leave? Nabiki? She was good at math, but it was all
she could do to support a home at seventeen. At three he wouldn't' even
ask. She was smart but not *that* smart.
Soun and Kimiko, Nabiki's parents? No, Soun was Genma's best friend.
His wife might say something, but at best it would turn out that Ranma
would be saved, not his parent's house.
Little boy Ranma had climbed up on the bathroom counter and put both
tiny hands against the mirror. "Belldandy, are you in there?" He'd asked
seriously.
There had been no answer, and he'd waited for hours.
Ranma slid down off the pile of cushions. That left only one person.
He took out a fresh sheet of paper and began carefully forming his
words. Two year old hands are clumsy, without enough bone to really hold
the pen right, so he took extra care.
Little boy Ranma composed a letter to the only person he knew who
could handle this, and might believe him.
He wrote in fluent Chinese, Amazon dialect.

"Cologne,
My name is Ranma Saotome. I am two years old. I have been training
in the martial arts all my life, and am the strongest of my generation.
If you have a great granddaughter, and that great granddaughter is also
two years old (she might be named Shampoo) I would challenge her
according to Amazon law.
If I win you have to *promise* to help me save my mother's home."

He included his home address as the place of meeting, then sought
out where his mother kept her stamps. He also wrote other letters, this
time to local companies, asking them to turn off the electricity, gas
and phone.
He wouldn't be needing them, and he had to save what he could to
meet the next mortgage payment. He had to survive until Cologne got
there, if she did.
Then young Ranma got to work.

Ranma poured himself another okanomiyaki, using the last of the
batter. Power was going to be turned off today and he'd wanted to get
the last use out of the griddle.
He'd rekeyed all the locks, secured every window and door, and
bolted closed the shutters. He'd even removed Genma's name from the
people who could access his family's bank account.
There had been four withdrawals in the last day, none of them by his
parents.
So that was set. He'd reduced all he could the damage Genma was
doing to them. Ranma left a basement window unlocked, one that he could
move through easily but that Genma could never navigate, left a note
explaining everything that he had done in case his parent's returned,
and slipped out.
On the front door was a wooden plaque, written in Chinese. It told
Cologne (and anyone else who could read it) that "If I am not here,
please seek me at the Tendo dojo" and gave directions. It was signed
Ranma Saotome.

He hope this worked.
Kimiko hadn't aged a day. Which was understandable seeing as how
he'd lost fourteen of them somewhere. She *should* be looking young.
Ranma approached the mother and three daughters playing in the park.
Akane was pouring dirt from a spoon, then scooping it up and pouring it
out again, Nabiki was watching bugs, and Kasumi was playing on the
swings, with her mother to help her.
Ranma made double sure that he looked sufficiently bedraggled.
He went up to the happy young mother and tugged on her skirt.
"Excuse me," he asked, with just the right catch in his voice. Kimiko
stopped pushing her daughter and looked down. Concern instantly mapped
her features.
She knelt down beside him, Kasumi got of the swing and came as well.
"Little boy! What's happened? You look all lost. Where are your
parents?"
Ranma sniffled, but kept his chin up bravely.
"Are you Mrs. Tendo?"
She nodded, stunned by the question.
"I'm Ranma Saotome. My parents left. A man named Genma was supposed
to take care of me. I haven't seen him in days. Do you know where to
find him?"
Endangering children does not earn a woman's good graces.
In fact, there are few things that can earn a woman's outrage like
finding a child in such a state. That the child, hardly a toddler,
seemed to be dealing with it so well could only made it worse for the
man to inflict it.
Kimiko Tendo lifted the young boy and ushered in her own little
flock. "Come girls, we're going home. You're father has some explaining
to do about that friend of his."

Soun had the misfortune not to have asked his friend where he'd
gotten that money they'd been drinking on.
Kimiko could do a dragon head that made Soun's demon head weep tears
of shame. Even Happosai fled in mortal terror of it.
Kimiko put Ranma in a low sink, shucking off her own robe. "The
*NERVE* of that man! The brazen, selfish... and Soun was at it with him!
Why..."
She cooled off some of her own steam, calming herself as she washed
the boy. "And you've borne up under it so bravely, too. Tell me, how old
are you?"
Ranma lifted his arms so Kimiko could wash his sides. "I just had my
second birthday the day before my parents left."
Kimiko froze into immobility, her eyelid twitching. Shaking herself
she resumed the first bath he'd had in nearly a week. "You seem *very*
advanced for your age. Have you been talking long?"
Ranma shook his head. He'd freak her out if she knew the real truth.

Kimiko finished washing and rinsing him. "Now would you like to play
in the tub?"
He nodded.
"Do you need to go potty first?"
He shook his head.
She put him in and, while she was at it, started washing Akane and
Nabiki as well. Kasumi was there to serve as crowd control.
Ranma discovered that he *did* need to go. Seeing how much a handful
the Tendo sisters were, he crawled out of the tub, made use of the
toilet, cleaned himself, and got back in.
Kimiko had this huge bead of sweat on the back of her head, but her
wiggling children prevented any more reaction than this.
"Potty trained already? You must have a *wonderful* mother."
Ranma turned on the cute factor. "She's alot like you."
Kimiko tried not to be *too* pleased with the praise. Children said
such darling things. She put Akane in the tub with him.
Akane hit him with a tiny toy mallet.
Ranma was doing this for purely practical reasons. Two year olds are
just not physically capable of caring for themselves. It took him
enormous time to do simple tasks he could perform in the middle of a
flying leap before. Even opening a door was a major effort.
He needed someone to take care of him, and the only someone
available was Mrs. Tendo.
But there was daily care, and there was the mortgage. Kimiko was not
rich, nor was her family, and Genma had spent the mortgage money. Or at
least he had gotten away with it when he ran. If Happosai was with them
there was no chance of it being returned.
Nabiki joined them in the bath. Her favorite toy seemed to be a
large sponge. She would wring it out, float it on the water so she could
watch it sink, then wring it out again. Or she would wave her arms and
splash with it.
There are reasons why kids do these things. They are learning how
the world works. Their play is just one big endless science experiment,
at least until they get on with important stuff.
But Ranma had already learned all that stuff. In fact, many, many
times. So he got out and helped Kasumi wash her hair.
Kasumi seemed surprised by this assistance, but allowed the little
cherub to brush and comb while she scrubbed.
"Are you *sure* you're not older, Ranma dear?" Kimiko asked,
slipping into the bath with her daughters.
He nodded firmly.
"Oh." Kimiko said, wondering what kind of mother could produce such
a well behaved, brave little boy as this one. She got the impression
that Nodoka was either some kind of super mom, or very, very lucky.

To be continued...

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************************************************

Author's Notes:
Heh. Well, I'm still doing it. I really *do* intend for this to have
a definite end somewhere, but I just *had* to explore this little side
note of Ranma's character. And besides, the more material I have to work
with, the more you'll be able to read before I wind this up.
So tolerate my universe hopping, okay?

Just so everyone is clear:
We have Universe A, the true origin of Ranma. It is as close to
correct as I feel like making it. I actually *do* make an effort, I just
don't agonize over it.
We have Universe B, Ranma's true home, and where he spends most of
his time. It is as wildly inaccurate as amuses me.
We leave this part with Ranma stuck in Random Universe 1. None of
the Random universes will ever be revisited. The only places our Ranma
will go more than once are Universes A and B.

Bear with me. Dealing with new situations and problems is what this
Ranma does best. I found my muse leaving me when I left him in place for
too long. So he will hop around as seemeth me good, always returning to
home, where we will gradually get to all those things you have been
pestering me about.

Brief explanation of Random Universe 1, just to control our confusion.
The negaverse general flung Ranma *out* of universe B, and triggered
the Destiny Ring to activate at landing. So Ranma got flung at random,
and then the ring wished him small, also at random.
Ranma still has alot of learning to do before I get to the happy
ending.

How did Mercury know about Saturn when `officially' she hadn't
activated yet? Well, all that studying can't *just* be about school, you
know.
Scout Power Assemble can pull Pluto a short distance through time,
or even call a Scout near her activation time. So Ranko, as Sailor
Earth, got both Saturn and Pluto in part five even though neither had
officially activated yet.
Makes things easier on me, the writer.

Anyone attempting to correct my mis-usage of Japanese endings (like
-san, just as an example) will have French mispronounced at them.
Mercy Buckets.