A/N: Well, everyone loves Jun, right? ^^ The timid little nice guy that has a hidden violent streak as long as the Nadesico? That violent streak is going to become key this time. I would have to say that this fanfic was inspired by the video "30 Minutes" by Tatu. Yes, Russian lesbians. But, if you've seen the video, I guess you know what's gonna happen, huh? Well, fans of Jun rejoice: no suicidal tendencies here. Anyway, if you're not into violence and such, turn away kiddies. Mucho violence… Thus the rating… or at least compound that with my ever-famous vulgarity and then it's thus the rating… Yeah. Sad too, just so you know. Anyway, let's a-go!

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Thursday. Lots of things usually happened on Thursdays. None of them interesting. On the Nadesico, it was bridge crew laundry day. Funny how I remember that after all this time. Thursday is also garbage day at my apartment complex. But what I really hated about Thursdays is that it's almost the weekend. You can anticipate the freedom, you can practically smell it, but it's still too far away. Thursdays, for that reason, are hectic and hateful.

And it just so happens that a certain wedding took place on the thirteenth of June. A Thursday.

Just about everyone invited to the wedding took the week off in search of wedding gifts, dresses, suits, all sorts of things, and I was no exception. But I did not go off to buy a gift, nor did I go rent a tuxedo. This is merely because of whom the joining would be of. Misumaru Yurika, my one and only true love, and Tenkawa Akito, her childhood friend. Needless to say, I was crushed. I knew they had been living together and taking care of Ruri and such, but last I spoke with Misumaru-san, he hadn't given Tenkawa consent to marry Yurika.

Jesus Christ, why would Misumaru-san let Yurika to get engaged to that cook? I mean, sure, he may be more equipped to be her "knight in shining armor", but what's to say they won't live in near-poverty for the rest of their lives? Misumaru-san thought I was a fine young man when I asked if I could propose to Yurika. While I may not be exactly what Yurika wanted, I was her best friend, and I'm a lot better off that Tenkawa… Well… not so much anymore, with the war over and all.

But goddammit, I loved her a lot more than Tenkawa ever did! He was always talking down to her and calling her stupid, even when she was showing just how much of a genius she is. What kind of person does that to someone they say they love? A kindergartener? Pushing girls in the mud because they like them? Just how fucking childish is Tenkawa? He may be physically capable of kicking my ass, but there are just some things that I don't even understand HOW Yurika can see past.

But back onto the subject at hand. I decided on wearing my black suit to the wedding. I wore the same one to my father's funeral. I know, sounds kind of morbid, but morbid fits my whole standing on this little gathering. My gift, on the other hand, had been in the works all this week, and was to be a surprise. Of course, it wasn't going to be something stupid like curtains or china, as I'm sure everyone else gave them. It was going to be something great. If Yurika was going to willingly leave my life, she had to go out with a bang, you know? Hee hee hee.

Why oh WHY did she ever accept to marrying me if she only thought of me as her friend? Why didn't she ever tell me that I wasn't anything more? Why did she wait until it was too late?

I proposed to her after I had lived at their house for a while, once my mother decided it was time to kick me out. She accepted saying she would rather marry no one else than her best friend, since she was convinced that her true love was dead. Maybe I should have seen it then. Maybe I'm blind. But oh well. I was convinced that she at least liked me enough to spend the rest of her life with me, and that maybe she could eventually love a wallflower like me.

But of course, that letter from Nergal had to come. She had to become captain of the Nadesico. I had to almost hit the damn cook on the bicycle on our way to Hiratsuka. If we just we a little faster, none of this would have happened and I would not of faded into the background. I think that's what hurt the most. Not when she declared that she was madly in love with Tenkawa, though that was a stab in the chest. No, I heard what she said when I was fighting to stop the Nadesico from breaking through the Big Barrier. All the bridge crew KNEW I was involved with Yurika. But I think they just assumed I was the dropped boyfriend or something. Not the dropped fiancée. She said I was just a good friend. That twisted the knife in my heart. I knew then that she wanted to marry me specifically because of what she said: she wanted to marry her best friend if her true love was no longer available.

I'm just a hopeless romantic, I suppose. But I won't be left in the dust unless I get to see it go. Hee hee hee.

But how could she just forget that I exist? I'm her best friend at least, dammit! How could she forget about me like that? When we were riding around in the Bering Strait, Yurika made a mistake and a lot of people were mad at her. She ran off to cry, and Tenkawa comforted her. TENKAWA! I couldn't because, lo and behold, Yurika's gone? I'm in her spot. And what does she say? Oh yeah, I know what she said. Megumi was convinced that I liked her after her crush on Tenkawa ran off, and included me on all her gossiping parades. What does Yurika say in the virtual reality room? "You're the only one I can turn to any more, Akito." What the hell happened to her best friend!?! I wasn't mad at her for her mistake. Sure, a little annoyed because it almost threw the whole mission, but nothing more than that. Through all this time, I'm the only person that seems to remember that Yurika was captain for a reason, and it was NOT her body. She's a tactical genius. There won't ever be another like her that can still be innocent without being naïve, at least not much, and still can have a life with all her brilliance.

Oh man, maybe I'm having second thoughts on this one. No. I did what I had to. Well, I wrapped up my package and carefully set it in the car before I got in and drove off, making sure that all of my affairs were in order before leaving. Can't go and follow your destiny without making sure that if anything happens, you're still good.

The wedding was just so fucking stupidly beautiful. Yukina was a good flower girl, it wasn't right when she dumped the whole damn basket of flowers on my lap, to the amusement of just about everyone else. They had somehow roped Uribatake's son into being ring bearer. And, as expected, Minato, Megumi, and Ruri were all bridesmaids. It was surprising to see Ryoko as the maid of honor, but I suppose those two had become good friends over time. That and everyone knew that Ryoko had become Tenkawa's best friend, so of course she probably was getting fairly close to Yurika.

The bride was beautiful, Tenkawa was deserving of all of my glares, and I had gone through second thoughts. Well, my gift was already given. It was time to follow through. I was sick and tired of being pushed aside. Sick and tired of being ignored. Sick and tired of seeing those Martians locking lips.

Show time. Two minutes to go. Two minutes before everyone will see that I won't be ignored anymore.

They did the ritualistic running out of the church, everyone blowing the ritualistic bubbles, and everyone looking ritualistically happy. Minato even commented that she hadn't seen me so pleased in such a long time. She said she expected me to be in tears. I shrugged her off, saying I was happy that Yurika found her true love. I let myself be swallowed by the crowd then, because god knows I'm a horrible liar.

They squeezed themselves into the backseat of the limo, already full of most of their gifts. I had made quite certain that mine would be in with them, and not in the trunk or anything, as they rode to the reception. Everyone started to watch the car drive down the street, still whooping and cheering in joy. I checked my watch and grinned, trying to contain my own happiness.

Three seconds to release. Three, two, one.

I could almost hear the clock click as the set time had finally come. I could feel the faces around me shift suddenly from happiness and celebration to horror and shock. I watched the fireball that was the limo with a sick sense of satisfaction. Some of the men, namely Misumaru-san and Hory-san ran down the street to where the blown-up limo was burning intensely, burning all the curtains and destroying the china that the others gave them. I felt one side of my mouth turn up as I realized that I gave them the best present. If they wanted eternity together, they got it. And I gave it to them.

A charred hand landed before us on the sidewalk, being blown off in the explosion and just now landing. I checked my watch to find that five seconds had passed. Only five seconds. I stepped forward to examine the dismembered hand. By the size and the diamond ring on it, I realized that it was Yurika's hand. It was sick, I know, but I needed a trophy for my ultimate accomplishment. I picked it up and headed to my car. I could hear them behind me, some saying I was sick, some saying I had cracked, and others feeling deep sympathy for me.

Sympathy? For me? Hah! They're a little late, aren't they? If they wanted to pity me, they should have done so when Tenkawa still hated Yurika while we were on the Nadesico. Not now, not after my greatest feat. Not after their great end. Everyone won, you know. Yurika and Tenkawa got their precious eternity together. No one has to worry about them suddenly divorcing or something over something stupid. I finally no longer am ignored, not after that stunt. And to top it all off, no one had to pay the driver of the limo.

I came right home and started writing this. Once they realize that it was my doing, they'll want me. They know where I live. And I'm ready to fess up. Why shouldn't I take responsibility? It's my amazing feat. I made everyone happy in one swoop. Sometimes even I can be a little arrogant, ne?

Well, maybe some Thursdays aren't so bad.

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OWARI

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A/N: Heeeheheheeheheeee… I've wanted to do this for a while. Jun is awesome, but he doesn't get enough in the anime, and I know a lot of people love Jun. I love Jun, at least. It's nice to give him a little revenge for once. So, I know you probably saw this a mile away, but how was it? I tried to foreshadow without giving it away, but I couldn't help it with some of the little statements that came out. ^^ Anyway, not bad for a one-shot. Well, you guys all know the drill. Reviews make writers happy and such! Bye~!