Sermons from the Church of Orochi- part two.
The end a fifteen minute interval, where Goenitz and Shermie went down to the crypt for a quick shag. The Holy Rollin' Goenitz returns to his flock, caught up in a righteous fever. Shermie wishes he'd let her be more involved in the show.
Goenitz- Welcome back brethren! I hope the short break was as pleasant for you as it was for me. Now, I have some bad news. Two weeks ago, two of our more respected brethren were "arrested", so the authorities say. Vice and Yamazaki were captured by the Devil in human form. A man who has made no secret of his mission to destroy our weird cult, uh I mean loving church. And the Devil's work is aided by an Orochi bitch traitor. Chris, get the video ready.
Chris- Why me?
Goenitz hits him.
Goenitz- Because you're small and I'm big. Therefore, it is my Orochi given right to order you around you little shit.
Chris drags a TV/VCR set across the pulpit. Switching it on, we see who Goenitz is referring to as "the Devil in human form" It's Heidern, and the Orochi traitor is his adopted daughter Leona. They have caught Vice and Yamazaki trying to assasinate the Mayor of Southtown, and are interrogating them.
Heidern- You will tell us everything about your group's plans!
Vice- Go fuck yourself, cyclops.
Leona- We have ways of making you talk.
Yamazaki- Ooh, scary! (sarcasm)
Leona- Shall we, daddy?
Heidern- Yeah, in 10 minutes, they'll be screaming to tell us everything.
Vice- Wanna bet? You have to turn us to the Southtown police soon.
Yamazaki- You can't touch us, and know it. Southtown police are wussies.
In response, Leona pulls out their instrument of torture. It is a "Daphne and Celeste" CD.
Leona- Right, we lock you in a dark, soundproof room. With this on inside!
Both Orochis (in tears)- NOOO! NOT THAT! WE'LL TALK! WE'LL DO ANYTHING!
Back to the sermon. The Holy Rollin' Goenitz is furious.
Goenitz- See how they torture innocent Orochi brethren! Men and women who's only "crime" is to follow the true path to salvation! I demand that Heidern be tried as a war criminal...
Shermie interrupts mid rant.
Shermie- Uh, Goenitz.
Goenitz- Not now. You're insatiable.
Shermie- I'm not here about sex. But Vice and Yamazaki escaped from Southtown prison. Mature told me they led a mass breakout, and are laying low in Brazil for a while.
Goenitz- It's obviously a lie. She's been brainwashed by the authorities. By the Devil Heidern!
Shermie- No, it's true. She gave me this photo.
The photo shows Vice and Yamazaki leading a horde of criminals busting out of prison. They carry stolen police weapons.
Goenitz- Uh, pictues can be faked you know. Where is Mature anyway?
Shermie- She stayed at home. Something about a "Party of Five" afternoon.
Goenitz- Remind me to have her destroyed by the fury of our lord Orochi. Gimme a Hallelujah!
Another interruption. This time, it's the sound of machinegun fire. Goenitz turns and sees three of the congregation dead. He looks up to Yashiro, operating the M60.
Goenitz- Yashiro! What have I told you about killing the flock whilst we're on air?!
Yashiro- I can explain. The guy in the back's wearing an Iori Yagami T shirt...
Goenitz- Fair enough. Carry on.
Yashiro- The woman on the edge put Lithuanian coins into the collection box, and the other one said something about you being a money grabbing lunatic.
Goenitz turns to the rest of his congregation, and addresses them once again.
Goenitz- And so you see brethren! The fate of those who would defy our lord and saviour Orochi! Brother Yashiro, you are forgiven. Gimme a Hail Goenitz!
Yashiro- Yeah, whatever. How much longer's this shit gonna take?
Shermie- Yeah, this is getting boring.
Goenitz- Shut up! I will take as long as it takes to spread the message of Orochi to the unwashed masses! Besides, the networks have to fill up the sunday mornings with something.
End of part two. How will the sermon of the Holy Rollin' Goenitz go next? Do CYS even give a flying fuck? Find out in part three.
The end a fifteen minute interval, where Goenitz and Shermie went down to the crypt for a quick shag. The Holy Rollin' Goenitz returns to his flock, caught up in a righteous fever. Shermie wishes he'd let her be more involved in the show.
Goenitz- Welcome back brethren! I hope the short break was as pleasant for you as it was for me. Now, I have some bad news. Two weeks ago, two of our more respected brethren were "arrested", so the authorities say. Vice and Yamazaki were captured by the Devil in human form. A man who has made no secret of his mission to destroy our weird cult, uh I mean loving church. And the Devil's work is aided by an Orochi bitch traitor. Chris, get the video ready.
Chris- Why me?
Goenitz hits him.
Goenitz- Because you're small and I'm big. Therefore, it is my Orochi given right to order you around you little shit.
Chris drags a TV/VCR set across the pulpit. Switching it on, we see who Goenitz is referring to as "the Devil in human form" It's Heidern, and the Orochi traitor is his adopted daughter Leona. They have caught Vice and Yamazaki trying to assasinate the Mayor of Southtown, and are interrogating them.
Heidern- You will tell us everything about your group's plans!
Vice- Go fuck yourself, cyclops.
Leona- We have ways of making you talk.
Yamazaki- Ooh, scary! (sarcasm)
Leona- Shall we, daddy?
Heidern- Yeah, in 10 minutes, they'll be screaming to tell us everything.
Vice- Wanna bet? You have to turn us to the Southtown police soon.
Yamazaki- You can't touch us, and know it. Southtown police are wussies.
In response, Leona pulls out their instrument of torture. It is a "Daphne and Celeste" CD.
Leona- Right, we lock you in a dark, soundproof room. With this on inside!
Both Orochis (in tears)- NOOO! NOT THAT! WE'LL TALK! WE'LL DO ANYTHING!
Back to the sermon. The Holy Rollin' Goenitz is furious.
Goenitz- See how they torture innocent Orochi brethren! Men and women who's only "crime" is to follow the true path to salvation! I demand that Heidern be tried as a war criminal...
Shermie interrupts mid rant.
Shermie- Uh, Goenitz.
Goenitz- Not now. You're insatiable.
Shermie- I'm not here about sex. But Vice and Yamazaki escaped from Southtown prison. Mature told me they led a mass breakout, and are laying low in Brazil for a while.
Goenitz- It's obviously a lie. She's been brainwashed by the authorities. By the Devil Heidern!
Shermie- No, it's true. She gave me this photo.
The photo shows Vice and Yamazaki leading a horde of criminals busting out of prison. They carry stolen police weapons.
Goenitz- Uh, pictues can be faked you know. Where is Mature anyway?
Shermie- She stayed at home. Something about a "Party of Five" afternoon.
Goenitz- Remind me to have her destroyed by the fury of our lord Orochi. Gimme a Hallelujah!
Another interruption. This time, it's the sound of machinegun fire. Goenitz turns and sees three of the congregation dead. He looks up to Yashiro, operating the M60.
Goenitz- Yashiro! What have I told you about killing the flock whilst we're on air?!
Yashiro- I can explain. The guy in the back's wearing an Iori Yagami T shirt...
Goenitz- Fair enough. Carry on.
Yashiro- The woman on the edge put Lithuanian coins into the collection box, and the other one said something about you being a money grabbing lunatic.
Goenitz turns to the rest of his congregation, and addresses them once again.
Goenitz- And so you see brethren! The fate of those who would defy our lord and saviour Orochi! Brother Yashiro, you are forgiven. Gimme a Hail Goenitz!
Yashiro- Yeah, whatever. How much longer's this shit gonna take?
Shermie- Yeah, this is getting boring.
Goenitz- Shut up! I will take as long as it takes to spread the message of Orochi to the unwashed masses! Besides, the networks have to fill up the sunday mornings with something.
End of part two. How will the sermon of the Holy Rollin' Goenitz go next? Do CYS even give a flying fuck? Find out in part three.