Author's Note: Ah, the irritating idiosyncrasies of the internet. I was going to upload this chapter this morning, much earlier, but the stupid thing isn't working, so now I'm just sort of waiting to upload this. Grrr. Hey, but guess what, people? I was going to tell you how I'm going to have to draw everything out slower because I've been having writer's block on the end, and I also said that the end is near. But guess what? I had a flash of inspiration which broke my writer's block, and now the final chapter is going to be two chapters farther away. Admittedly, one is a supershort, cheap chapter, but it counts nonetheless. Aren't you happy for me? After months of not being able to figure out how to make the end work, I've finally figured it out, and now it's going to be done soon!
It would be done sooner, except I can't remember what I did with my copy of Alanna, and I need it to do something. Isn't that just the most awful luck? But fear not, because if worse comes to worse, I'll just go to the library and borrow a copy. Or maybe my friend will lend me her copy… But I might find my own before it comes to that.
Umm, yeah, I know I kinda cheated and got a lot of this chapter from the book, but it was kind of inevitable, if you know what I mean. It had to be the way it is.
Oh, I forgot. I wrote the replies to reviews before I had my inspiration, so I keep saying that it'll be a while before you get to the end, and that the chapters will be coming slower, and all that. Well, just ignore that, because although the chapters will be a little slower, they won't be really slow, which is what I thought before. Anyway, read the chapter!
Chapter 10: Persopolis
Alanna looked up towards the high granite walls of Persopolis. The soldiers on the walls held weapons that Alanna knew were well cared for and much used. The city was built even stronger than what Trebond. Or at least, stronger than what Alanna remembered Trebond as being. She hadn't been back in four years.
The closer she came to Persopolis, the more Bazhir she met. They passed her with a nod and a curious look for her violet eyes. Alanna was used to it. Most Bazhir she saw had curious glances for her violet eyes and northern cast of features. Many didn't notice the difference between her and other Bazhir girls, but the perceptive did, and many of them stared inquisitively at her. Alanna ignored them.
She passed through the gates of the city and showed her pass to the guard at the gates. He waved her on to the heart of the city.
After a few minutes, she came to the castle. She gave Silvermoon to the man waiting for her horse and asked to see the governor. The girl knew that the Northerners would not recognize Ali Mukhtab's other title. She walked quickly toward the Sunset Room, following the directions she had been given. She noticed some sort of banquet going on, but paid no attention to it. It wasn't her business.
~
Thom sighed wearily. This formal banquet was getting tiring. Although he didn't mind social events very much, after a long day of travel, the dinner wasn't his idea of a good time. He was tolerating it; Alanna would have been miserable. Alanna. He let out a sad sigh. It had been almost four years, and he still missed her. In fact, he still barely believed she was dead.
His reverie was interrupted as a dark, well-dressed man appeared in front of him. The stranger was Bazhir, with walnut skin and glossy black hair.
"Can I help you?" the boy asked. The stranger shook his head.
"No, but I believe I can help you. My name is Ali Mukhtab; I am the governor of this castle. Sir Myles told me that you were asking about the Bazhir. I believe I can answer your questions."
Thom considered this. He had been asking Myles about the Bazhir. They discomfited him somehow—maybe it was their curious stares.
"Why do you, a young man from a northern fief, wish to know about the Bazhir?"
"A person can never tell where he'll end up," Thom said bluntly. "I understand northerners. I don't understand the Bazhir."
"What is it you want to know?"
"Well, for one thing, why does Persopolis exist? Why one city, out of the entire desert? And why here?"
Ali Mukhtab smiled. "If you and your friends can leave discreetly, I will show you the reason for this city."
~
Alanna rose as the door opened. She had been told to wait in the Sunset Room for the Voice. It seemed he had finally arrived.
Ali Mukhtab and five boys entered the room. Alanna stifled a gasp as she recognized one as her twin brother, Thom. She quickly regained her composure as the Voice addressed her.
"Umar Komm's apprentice, I presume?"
Alanna nodded. "Yes, sir. Here is the package he sent you."
The man smiled his thanks and put the package aside on a shelf. He indicated the boys, who were watching curiously. "These are Squires Thom, Gareth, Raoul, and Alex, and Prince Jonathan, son of the Northern King."
Alanna nodded, acknowledging them. "I am Kalan, apprentice to Umar Komm, shaman of Sunset Dragon," she said, giving her Bazhir name. The boys nodded in return, and Ali Mukhtab's eyes twinkled. He knew who she really was, but didn't mention anything about it.
"I brought these young men here to see the Sunset Room to show them the reason Persopolis exists," the Voice told her.
The boys wandered around the room. Thom looked at the mosaics on the walls, while the one Alanna assumed was Prince Jonathan looked out at the view of the desert. Suddenly he pointed.
"That small black spot—just where the sun is. That's the Black City?"
Ali Mukhtab nodded. "That is the Black City, the doom of my people for centuries. Ever since we can remember—and our memories reach beyond the days when your palace, Highness, was a palace for the Old Ones—our young people have been called to the Black City. Our masters lived there, the Nameless Ones. They stole our souls and gave us farms and cattle. We swore never to farm again. Legends say we stopped there when we came north, over the Inland Sea. The Nameless Ones welcomed us and asked us to share their land and farm their crops. All this, the legends say, was green and fertile." Ali's hand swept over the leagues of empty sand. "When we saw that they were stealing our spirits, we rebelled. We burned them and their city, and all the land turned to dust. After we left, never to return, we built Persopolis, so that we might watch the City, always."
"How could you burn them out, if they were so powerful?" Gary wanted to know.
"They feared fire above all things," the man replied. "Their spirits linger in the City, but they cannot pass the circle of fire we placed around their walls."
"You said they call your young people," Alex said. "What do you mean?"
The man sighed. "Sometimes a youth or a maiden will awaken in the night and try to ride to the City. If they are stopped, they rave and scream and refuse their food, talking only of the city and of the gods who wish them to come there. If we do not let them go, they starve themselves to death."
"And if they go, they don't come back," Jonathan said quietly. Alanna looked at him. He seemed to be paying unusual attention to Ali Mukhtab. Most Northerners dismissed Bazhir legends as nothing more than the silly fantasies of a backwards people. This boy, however… He was genuinely interested. Alanna stored that knowledge away for future reference.
"Isn't it better to let them go?" Raoul asked. "Maybe it isn't the City at all. Your life—well, it's harsh. Maybe they really go on to other cities, to live somewhere else."
"We would like to think so," the governor of the castle replied. "But we have trained our young to be honest." His eyes were on Alanna as he said this, and she squirmed. "Those who leave us for the cities go with their families' blessings—or curses—but they always tell us that is where they go. Those who want the Black City speak only of it, as if they could not lie about it if they tried."
"It seems cruel to me to tie them up and keep them," Raoul said, yawning sleepily. It was getting late.
"To the Bazhir, even death by starvation is better than the fate we think awaits them there," Ali Mukhtab told him. "We have another legend—the Bazhir have many legends—that says one day we will be free of the call of the City. It says two gods, the Night One and the Burning-Brightly One, will go into the City to battle with the immortals there. I do not know how true that may be." The Bazhir smiled. "Some, like Lord Martin, say we have many legends because we possess little else. He is probably right."
"Your people seem to be old and wise," Jonathan remarked. He was standing by the window, watching the last pool of sun disappear into the desert. Alanna congratulated herself on being correct in her observations. "It's too bad no one has written a history of the Bazhir."
Ali Mukhtab looked at him. His eyes opened wide, fixing Jonathan with his strangely intent gaze. "Are you interested in such things, Highness?"
Jonathan returned that powerful look evenly. "I have to be," he said. "The Bazhir will be my people too, someday."
Mukhtab bowed low. "I will see if such a history can be found—or written."
"I look forward to reading it," the Prince replied. He followed his friends out into the hall. Alanna remained behind, watching her brother and his friends leave the room. Mukhtab turned his attention to her.
"You should tell your brother who you are. He believes you to be dead. He is grieving." Alanna nodded.
"I will," she said. "I just thought it should be in private."
Alanna felt Mukhtab's eyes on her as she walked out into the hall.
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All right, it's time to respond to all my reviews! Guess what? You guys just put me over the centennial mark! Over 100 reviews! Yippeeeeeee!!!!!!! Here we go…
Cloud Walker: I'm sorry, but I HAVE been having writer's block on this story. I'm trying to stretch it out so that at least there isn't a big huge pause where I don't post anything, but I'm afraid there's going to be big long gaps anyway. Be patient with me. I'm doing my very best not too make it too awful for you guys.
Punkpixie87: Nonsense, you deserve all the praise you can get. Why do you think you have over two hundred reviews? Because your story is really good! Silly pixie. I'm not sure that that paragraph actually qualifies as a rant, even though you say it does. More of a ramble, to my mind. To rant, you have to be ANGRILY VEHEMENT, which you weren't. (Isn't it fun to write things IN CAPITALS? It's so FUN!) At least, you didn't sound like it. Thanks for the compliments. ::blushes:: You're such a nice reviewer person. You put me in a good mood. And actually, I'm afraid Jon is going to be pretty heavily in attendance in the next few chapters. Unfortunately, I need him for the plot. Just like you have to have A/J fluff for your story to work. But there won't be any A/J fluff, I promise. She's pretty mean to him, actually. Because let's face it, he's an idiot. He needs all the dissing he can get.
Lady Gabriella of Queenscove: Too bad, her hair is black now. But don't worry. Thom will be all happy again. Just not right now. And anyway, don't you think he's better this way than when he gets all weird and freaky after he comes back from the City of the Gods? I mean, he's depressed, but not brooding. Although he does the brooding thing well, I admit.
Lady of Red Oak Forest: Well, this is more. But you'll have to wait longer intervals for stuff now, I'm afraid. What with my writer's block and school and all.
Dragonlady: If I want you to flame… What? Did I miss something?
Elspeth: Hey, a Misty fan! At least, I assume so, from your nom de plume. Thanks for all the encouragement. : )
Athena Masterson: Yay, thank you! I assure you, the end is swiftly approaching. But the chapters are longer than most of mine, if that gives you any comfort. Umm, not too sure about a sequel. The ideas are there, and it probably will get written eventually, but I think it'll be a while before it gets up here. And sorry, but George isn't going to make his debut until the next story. Well, would you look at that. I'm not too sure about the sequel, but my fingers seem to be pretty certain I'm going to write one. How strange. Hey, German food IS good. But after two weeks, you tend to miss your American junk food. Or at least, I do. Can't speak for everyone. As for your seemingly endless chapters, I'd be happy if they WERE endless. That way I could spend the rest of my life reading your story… ::stops to contemplate that wonderful idea:: That'd be bliss. All right, I think I covered everything there. Oh wait. I need to add a resounding THANK YOU!
Babooshka: Hmm. Raving is possible, but I have a decided preference for staring in that context. But raving has its uses. Yes, I like that word. "Silvermoon neighed;" Yes, the semi-colon does go there. Semi-colons are often substituted instead of a change of sentence when one wants to show a close relationship between to sentences. That little phrase thingy could also be written, "Silvermoon neighed. Maliciously, Alanna fancied." But it really works better the way it is. I am sorry that you read the sentence wrong—I hate it when that happens to me. Okay, the Bazhir big cheeses accepted her for lots of reasons, which I'm too lazy to write out right now. I'm eventually going to go back and change that, due to complaints from other reviewers. ::cough,:: THEPENMAGE, ::cough:: You don't like Thom? I like Thom. He's fun to mess with. Yes, Goddess and sword have made their entrance. Ummm, Thom's life is not overly important to the story, so for the foreseeable future, we're just going to ignore that part of his existence. As for the rest…my lips are sealed.
ThePenMage: Yes, isn't it happy? I've actually passed 100 reviews! Yay! Well, you can kind of tell the end is getting close in this chapter. Build up, and all that. It's not fair. Everybody starts school after Labor Day, except for me. I live an unfortunate life. (Well, not really, but you know.) No, Meron is actually the name of the fief in the book. I didn't even realize it was in Pern until you mentioned it. But now I can't remember what part of it the series it's from. Meron, that is. I seem to have this connection to Bitra. Maybe it's the name of that psycho dude from Bitra in Dragonseye. Or maybe it's one of the other holds names… No, I don't think it's a hold. What IS it? I haven't read the Pern books for a while. Wait a second, didn't I say that Thom was going? Oh no, I just said Jon was going to ask Duke Gareth. Well, you were supposed to assume he said yes. Sorry about that. You'll be happy to know that Jon bashing will commence shortly. Shamanic—I don't know if that's right, either, but I think it's more right than just shaman. We'll just pretend it's correct. Who knows, maybe it is. Hey, Alanna could go Goth, couldn't she? Black hair, black burnoose, black make-up, and she'd be set. Except that'd be kind of hot in the desert sun, wouldn't it. Don't be sorry about the long reviews. I LIKE long reviews. And I gave you an equally long response.
Keziah: It seems like it, doesn't it. If I say anything more than that, I will be angry at my blabbermouthness, so I will stop now, before I give anything away.
Da-xia Nariko: Yay, one hundred! I'm happy too. Thank you for all your nice stuff.
Citrus Wine: How can I say it? Easily. I'm such a perfectionist, I truly believe it's bad. I'm glad YOU don't think so, however.
Barannilwen: School is only a week away! ::sniff:: And my friends are all incommunicado, so I don't know if anyone's in my classes! I hope it's not like last year where none of my really good friends were in my classes. Cross your fingers for me.
Seishi: As previously stated, I am A/G. So there isn't going to be any A/J romance if I can help it. If it there is, I will be very upset with myself.
__________, or the Nameless One: Grrr, it really bothers me that you have no name. Can't you just do a _____ at least, instead of just the empty space? It messes with my mind. But thanks for the review, at least.
Temptress: Yes, I do want flames. Why? I'm a pyro. (Just kidding. Well, I am, but that's not why I wanted flames.) I think I explained this to someone before… Oh yes, I had a big discussing about this with opal-dragon. But anyway. I happen to like knowing what's wrong with my story. I know there are things wrong with it, because if my writing was perfect then publishers would be lining up to get the rights to my stories and I'd be a multi-millionaire. (Man, wouldn't that rock? I wish my life WAS actually like that.) And since a) I know my story has problems, and b) I have such a huge ego, flames aren't going to hurt my feelings. In fact, a few flames would cheer me up. Wow, this is going to be really long, I can see it already. Droit de Seigneur. Actually, I've taken three years of French. I'm not a professional, but I don't suck at it by any means. And I actually knew what seigneur meant, once I thought about it. But yes, I did kind of ignore that. Sorry. But once you got all huffy about it, I decided to steal your thunder and really make you mad, just for the heck of it. I looked it up in my French to English dictionary. But now I completely don't get it. Right of lord? Duty of lord? What does that have to do with anything? Yes, I babble too. Often. I'm glad someone doesn't get mad about my short chapters. Cliffies—I'm afraid I do those naturally. Thanks, I did have fun on my trip. And I'm afraid I can't ignore school. All of the back to school stuff everywhere kind of destroys my illusion of freedom. I mean, you're watching TV and pretending you have nothing to worry about when you suddenly see a back to school commercial, and then you get all depressed. Plus, school starts next week for me. I'm so sad. Abiento, mon amie. (What do you do about that? You can't really say ma amie. Nor can you say m'amie. I know. We'll say ma copine. That resolves the issue quite nicely without intimating that you're a guy.)
Loopee: Dang, I was wrong. Capitol is a word. I was right about that. I just looked it up in the dictionary.
capital: (several different definitions, including…) a town or city that is the official seat of government in a political entity
capitol: the building in which a legislature meets (see, I got confused. Then it says, "see Usage Note at capital")
Usage: The term for a town or city that serves as a seat of government is capital. The term for the building in which a legislative assembly meets is capitol.
So you see, we were both right, although you were more correct than I.
Opal-dragon: You can have your quagmire. My new favorite word is librarian. Or maybe barbarian. ::ducks glare of death, and then dives for cover, preferably a foxhole, to escape the avenging Teri on a rampage:: I surrender! ::waves white flag:: I was just kidding! I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist. Sorry about your burn. That must bite. And Teri, it's not me that makes the chapters short. I don't do it on purpose. It just happens that way. The story refuses to continue itself without starting a new chapter. Ha ha, I don't have summer reading for another year. What books did they force you to read? Were they as bad as most books you read in school? I will talk to you later.
Wow, that was a lot. I think all of those replies took me a full hour. Thank you everybody! Come review more, and I will spend another hour replying to your comments! Flames welcome, but be specific!