Cloud's heart stopped. Embarrassed that he was acting so strange, he thought Zack or Sephiroth might think less of him. Cloud looked around nervously, starting to sweat, "Uh... Um..." He shifted uncomfortably.
Sephiroth raised an eyebrow and impatiently folded his arms, "We need to get going."
As Cloud swallowed the saliva which was quickly building in his mouth, the pained look on his face changed as he raised his eyebrows because Zack tilted his head down as he leaned in toward Cloud, "Okay?" His eyes looked up at Cloud's. Turning around, Zack nodded to Sephiroth who snorted and sharply turned after glowering at Cloud. The dirty look caused him to flinch and he began to wish it was just he and Zack again. He liked it then. He liked thinking of Sephiroth as someone who should be placed on a pedestal, liked looking at Zack and listening to Zack and now he didn't have a chance to tell Zack how he felt. Cloud wondered if the chance to confess would come again.
The sweltering desert, unforgiving and open, made Cloud hotter as they neared Nibelheim. Sweat dripped down Cloud's temples and his throat began to feel dry, gritty even as he looked down at the sand. He wanted some water and a strange thought entered his mind. He saw a bead of sweat drop from Zack's jaw line and trail down his arm; it travelled the curves of his muscles, to his hand and it found its way to his fingertip. Cloud couldn't help but think of licking it off his fingers, his tongue pleasuring Zack as it moved up to his arm, to his lips, begging to be kissed. Or perhaps it would move down and Zack would moan as Cloud- but then he shook his head and found himself embarrassed that he was so aroused. As he looked up, he saw Sephiroth glance back. Caught in his erotic thoughts, Cloud felt a sudden surge of electricity through his body and he blushed. Could Sephiroth really read minds? Was he that powerful?
Now that he was thoroughly embarrassed again, Cloud's feeling of everything moving slowly began to take over, but he fought it. He wanted everything to move at the same pace and he couldn't bear feeling any more ashamed of himself than he already was. He stopped walking and staggered for a moment. The sound of his feet moving irregularly on the sand made Zack look back. As Cloud lifted his hand to his head, he thought he heard Sephiroth yell, "Cloud!" and he thought he saw Zack looking down at his face. This made him realize that he wasn't standing anymore and that he lost some time since.... He didn't know when.
***
Opening his eyes, Cloud looked at the first thing he saw: the ceiling. It felt like it was mid-afternoon. Light-headed, Cloud wondered how he came to be in this bed and under this strange ceiling. He turned his head to the left and saw Sephiroth staring out the window, with his hand resting on the sill. Upon further inspection, Cloud realized that the great old mansion was visible outside, over its wrought iron gate and gardens. He rustled out of bed and then stood over next to Sephiroth who said, "There's something about it..."
Cloud decided to be brave; he couldn't make himself out to be any more of an idiot than Sephiroth probably thought he was, "....What is it?" His voice was small.
Sephiroth sighed, "Zack's visiting his family." He sounded slightly annoyed.
So what? He didn't ask about Zack, "The mansion." He didn't understand why he felt so brave all of the sudden.
Sephiroth paused for a moment and shifted his weight to his other leg, "Something familiar, but I can't quite place it."
"Oh..."
"Yes, 'Oh'."
Both of them stared at it; Cloud hadn't seen it for at least five years and he almost forgot what it looked like, almost forgot about it. Sephiroth was a mystery to Cloud. He was such a powerful man that he seemed to emit power, he was overflowing with it like a bath tub gone unchecked for too long. It was a warm, attracting aura even though Sephiroth himself seemed cold. Cloud wanted to bask in Sephiroth's light, which he hadn't taken the time to noticed or appreciate before.
Now what had happened last night... or possibly even the other day seemed like a dream. Cloud thought that he must've dreamed it up. That's right. Sephiroth didn't really force a kiss on him. His hero didn't hold him down to a chair like he was just some weakling to control. No, of course not. Zack spoke highly of Sephiroth so he must be a good guy and Cloud wanted to be more familiar with him, but he thought since the opportunity had presented itself, he would find Zack and see if he could muster the courage to confess.
Taking one last look at Sephiroth who was lost in the view outside the window, Cloud turned to see where the stairs were.
"He carried you all the way here."
Cloud stopped and looked at him like he had said something Cloud would never have expected.
Sephiroth sighed, "Yes?"
"R- um... really?"
Sephiroth nodded, ".......We needed to arrive as soon as possible to check out the reactor. We can't stand in the desert because of you."
Cloud blushed and looked at the floor before he started to walk down the stairs. Thinking now was a good time to confess to Zack, he hesitated and then forced himself to descend.
He had never really been in the inn when he was younger, but it looked like a completely different place- familiar, yet so different from the perspective of someone taller and older. The strange feeling of familiarity tickling at the back of his mind, but not yielding anything provocative or significant, made Cloud feel inadequate. As he uncomfortably forced himself to stand in that one spot, Cloud felt out of place, as if someone put him there, but he didn't belong. He looked around at the clerk and knew who he was, remembered him from his childhood, but it meant nothing to him. He was only there under someone else's power and that he was the same person who left five years ago. Did he only fear that he was the same person? He certainly learned something about himself when he met Zack, but did that change who he was? Cloud thought that it certainly took a lot for a person to grow, but then he wondered: if people grew everyday, would they, after a time, forget they can change?