Lifetimes
By Carla
DISCLAIMERS: All the characters and locations belong to DC or Warner, I'm just playing around with them. Helena-oriented, but other characters play a big role as well.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I want to thank all the nice reviews I got and sorry it took me so long to post the next bit, I hope you enjoy this part. Also, I forgot to thank my beta-reader in the first chapter, and since she's pretty sure that her work is essential for people to be able to understand what I'm trying to say, I wish to thank her as well.
Chapter II: Loss
"That's it? Really! World's Greatest Detective is a nickname surely lost in you if you are done chasing me already!" Catwoman teased as she put a porcelain cat on the floor "Come on tall, dark and broody, it's not fun this way." "Selina..." "Tsk, tsk, tsk... if you're going to blow my secret identity, I'm going to have to use your first name as well Br...""Okay, you're right." Batman came near his lover and encircled her body in his arms "What the hell are you doing?"
"Stealing, what do you think thieves do?" Catwoman broke the embrace.
"Be serious. If this is about this morning..."
"You flatter yourself if you think you actually have that effect on me." She was getting mad. He was probably right.
"I'm not trying to control your actions..."
"Which is why you just chased me for a dozen rooftops because I took a souvenir from the museum."
"You know I can't allow you to take that. It's not yours..."
"So you have to take me down, easy or hard way, meow, stare, handcuffs, whip, batarang, kiss, not now... I know the drill."
"What's going on."
"An arrest, why? Are you not paying attention or something?"
"Selina..."
"Damn it Bruce! I'm not freaking Batgirl or Black Canary, okay? I don't report to you, and I don't take orders from you. If I want to go out at night and steal a cat vase I do it, that's who I am! A thief, because I choose to! I'm free, independent... and you can't say that you love me or want to be with me if you don't accept that little fact! I do as I please, that's me! I'm not changing, so you can either deal with it or be on your way." Catwoman's eyes changed while she gave this little speech, they were cat-looking now, so Batman knew beyond a doubt she was royally pissed with him, never a good thing. She turned now and was about to jump from the building, she loved to make an exit, but he wasn't about to allow her to go away from him so easily.
"Wait a minute there Selina, you had your piece, now I'm having mine."
"Well, well, Bat's mad, who knew?"
"You think this is easy for me? Damn it, I don't know what to make of this... of us. I know I want to be with you and I'm putting everything I am in the line for that. I'm trying to respect your space, you life, your choices, I'm doing it! But if I say one thing you don't agree with, you act as if I were a control freak!"
"You are a control freak!"
"Not with you! Not in that way! Maybe with Robin, Batgirl, ,Canary, Nightwing... you name it, but with you. I love you, deal with that, okay? And I'm going to ask you about your life and give an opinion if I have one, because my dear, that's what people in a relationship do." This time, it was Batman who started to leave, and a whip on his leg stopped him. He turned slowly to face his lover.
"I know... I just have a hard time making compromises... I've put so much time and energy in my independence Bruce..."
"I'm not trying to tame you... anymore."
"I know, but part of me has subdued because of you, whether I like it or not, I don't want to make you suffer. I love you too. That's why I was going to put that blasted thing back into the museum after our little chase session."
"You were."
"Yeah."
"I love you Catwoman."
"I love you Batman."
"Let's go home."
Bruce Wayne sat in a restaurant, looking at the glass of whisky in his hand, remembering. That seemed to be the only thing he had felt like doing for over seven years. At first, they had all come to him, asking him to go back to Gotham City, wait, that's not right. It was call New Gotham now, once it had being rebuilt after the great earthquake... Clark, Diana, Dick, Tim, almost every member of JLA. But he couldn't. Were they blind? Didn't they realize it had all been his fault? He had got people killed. He was supposed to be New Gotham's greatest hero, yet he had being unable to protect his parents from dying, the same with Jason, and then... He would never forget what it was like for him to enter Barbara's apartment. There she had lain, the proud Batgirl, his protege, a woman he had known for years, whom he trusted with his life and counted among not only his associates but among his friends, his family. And that sick bastard... he had taken pictures of her... Damn bastard! He should've let him die, but he'd had to be a hero, noble, and who had paid the price?
He had rushed with Barbara to the hospital, had said that he had found her in her place, that he had no idea who had done it. He then had burned the pictures the Joker had taken. Jim Gordon had been there in a heartbeat, so had been Dick Grayson. And then, the Prince of Clowns had given him the final blow... The television was on in the waiting room, and Batman had heard the words that had changed his life forever.
"And tonight, murder in New Gotham. In Lowan Street at 8:46 p.m. an unidentified man attacked businesswoman Selina Kyle, the killer..." He hadn't heard anything else, he had seen nothing but his world tumbling down. He knew who had done it. The Joker had killed the one woman he knew Batman loved above any other... Selina... Catwoman... She had officially and publicly dated Bruce Wayne for almost a year, at which time Catwoman's sightings had been few, almost nonexistent. She had told the rogues that she was using the notorious playboy Bruce Wayne to get in position for Catwoman's next strike. How she had managed to keep the facade for a year, Bruce would never know. But they had been happy together, they had been in love.
And one day, after the big party he had thrown for Dick when he graduated college, in which everything had seemed okay, she had left. Batman had searched for her, and he had found a single note in her apartment.
He took a sip of his whisky, while he read again the piece of paper he had carried ever since: All good things must come to an end Bruce, you know it's true. I love you, but please, if you love me, don't look for me, just let me go. Forever just isn't real, especially between people like us, I'm sorry. Selina. He had felt like dying when he had read the note, she was gone, and she had begged him not to look for her. Why? She had loved him, he had loved her... Maybe she had decided she wanted out before it was too late... And then he had realized, when Catwoman had simply disappeared from the world, that she had wanted a normal life, something he couldn't give her... and, truth be told, something he had never imagined she would have wanted at all. But she had asked him for his love to not look for her, and he had respected that.
Then, in a cold hospital's waiting room, he had learned she was dead. He could deal with her not being by his side... He had still missed her, dreamed of her, prayed for the day their paths would cross again, but at least she had been alive, and he hoped, happy. But now, the Joker had taken that away as well. Selina Kyle was dead. Barbara was in a coma, hopefully she would wake up. But even if she pulled through, her spine was severed, she would never walk again. Why? Selina, because she had played in the rooftops with him, because she had fallen in love with the Dark Night and, most importantly in the Joker's mind, Batman had fallen for the Feline Fatale as well. Barbara, because she had once been a kid who had wanted to play hero and he had allowed her. He had even become his mentor, he had cared about her.
So, the list had become longer... Martha and Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd, Selina Kyle, and God help him, Barbara Gordon. That had been it, save every other person in the world, get every person you ever loved killed. Who would be next? Alfred? Jim Gordon? Dick Grayson? Tim Drake? That had been it. Batman was not going to take away any other person Bruce Wayne had loved...
Leaving New Gotham had not been an easy decision. He had waited for about two months, and had left the day Alfred had called to inform him that Barbara had pulled through the coma. Which meant that now all she had to deal with was being crippled. Alfred had tried to talk to him all the time, but he had been like a ghost, he hadn't talked at all, just pretended he was listening. He had spent days and night at the Batcave, deciding. Her costume was there, he had managed to convince Selina to put her Catwoman outfit with his. He had been glad then, he could stare at it for hours. As well as pictures. He could drink in her eyes, her face, remember how her body had felt against him at night, her hair on his face, the way she had purred when she had been happy or the way her eyes had changed when she was mad... He'd had to go, the city had been burning his skin. He had mentored enough trainees to take charge. He'd had to go.
And he'd done it. The manor, Wayne Enterprises, the Life, he had left everything. Had he been a coward? Maybe. Didn't really care that much anymore. He was ashamed of not once seeing Barbara Gordon after her attack, not when she had been in a coma, not when she had woken up. Dick had confronted him about that, but he wouldn't listen. He had been too far gone. He hadn't gone to Selina's funeral either... He hadn't been able to bear it. He had gone at night... After all, the night had been their time, always the night... He had cried for hours at her grave, had left her a red rose, plead his eternal love one final time and had never turned back. It would've killed him.
He paid for his drink and headed out. It was raining, that was a good thing. He liked walking under the rain, so he sent his car home and walked around. Rain helps you feel alive, and sadly, Batman had a problem feeling alive nowadays.
"Hi." A voice called from behind. That was a voice he had no problem placing.
"Dick."
"Bruce." He turned slowly to face his son. Had he ever told him just how much he loved him? Probably not, Dick wouldn't believe him anyway.
"You've aged."
"And you're one to talk." He smiled, it was true. Dick was in his early forties, he was in his early fifties.
"What are you doing in Berlin?"
"Learning German." Dick replied. Unflappable, as ever. Annoying brat. Batman almost smiled. He had missed him, so much.
"Then I'll leave you to your studies." Bruce started to leave, pretty sure that the man that called himself Nightwing would stop him.
"Bruce wait." He breathed. So predictable.
"What are you doing here Dick?"
"I came to take you back home."
"I thought you said Bludhaven was your home now."
"You know what I mean Bruce, back to New Gotham."
"I'm fine where I am."
"It's been seven years!"
"Not nearly enough time."
"How long are you going to run away?"
"Why now? We've had this conversation before Dick. But why today?"
If only I could answer that, Bruce, Dick thought. Part of him wanted to, part of him was screaming to him to tell Bruce the truth. Barbara would understand, she was only waiting for Batman to come back to New Gotham to reunite him with his daughter... But Helena would simply kill him. She had made him swear not to tell him, but he had never promised anything about bringing him back. Helena was twenty-tree today. She was an adult woman, and she deserved all the pieces of her life. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, she was still a heartbroken kid, one in desperate need of her father. And his mentor, his father, the broken man in front of him, deserved one last chance at happiness, a reason to be alive. His daughter.
"Because it has been long enough Bruce, you ought to come back. Alfred, Barbara, you should see them, you owe it to them..."
"I don't owe anything to anyone, I've paid for everything in my life with more blood than I can remember."
"Bruce, just come with me."
"I can't, son," he said in a voice more endearing than the one he had used with his former Robin for about twenty years.
"Yes you can, and you have to. Listen to me Bruce! Is life any better here? Tell me you don't think about Selina Kyle when you wake up, when you close your eyes at night, and every moment in within. Deny you don't dare think about Barbara Gordon because you're ashamed you bailed in someone who put her life on the line every single night for you. Are you at peace here? Are you happy? Have you moved on?"
"Shut up!" Bruce screamed. Good thing they were still in the street, it was so noisy, no one even cared.
"See, Bruce? You're not done with that city, there are more loose ends than you can even begin to imagine. For over seven years now, you've been a dead man walking among the living. Put an end to this... if you only knew... all you could have... how many people need you so badly... Please Bruce, come with me, I'm begging you."
Bruce Wayne stared at the child he had raised as his own. Richard Grayson was a proud man, a strong man, a man that hated to beg for anything, especially in front of him. Something in his eyes was pleading to his father. Maybe it was time to face some old ghosts. They stared at each other for a few seconds until Bruce spoke again.
"Alright... Take me home, son."
Carolyn Lance was in New Gotham again. How many more times could she pull that one? She had come back looking for her daughter, and had been surprised to find her living with Barbara Gordon, the Oracle, and Helena Kyle, the Huntress. Dinah's reaction to meeting her mother again had been hardly enthusiastic, and Carolyn had been more than willing to take the blame for that.
Al Hawke had tracked her down and attacked. The only good thing that had come out of the whole incident had been the fact that she had finally made some sort of peace with Dinah, and had told her daughter that she was proud of her. Had she ever told her that during the six years she had had her? Back then Carolyn had been so busy being Black Canary that she had probably not paid enough attention to her child. She had thought she could do it all, be a super-hero and a mom, but she had been wrong...
It had been kind of insulting at first... The explosion and fire that hadn't managed to kill Al Hawke, a simple human, had managed to kill Black Canary, the meta-human, the legend. Yeah, right. But it had worked out for her. She had been in pretty bad condition and she hadn't wanted Dinah to see her like that, especially when her daughter had been starting her training and a whole new life... Maybe she simply wasn't meant to be a part of Dinah's new life. Oracle would take good care of her, maybe Catwoman Jr. too, although Carolyn was still not crazy about that one.
She had left the town, had met with some old friends who had helped her out. And now, she was in one piece again, and had decided she had to go to Dinah. But this time it would be different, she had to realize the truth, accept it: She had abandoned her daughter ten years ago, Barbara Gordon was her legal guardian now. Dinah had a life Carolyn couldn't force her to leave, and Barbara was right. Dinah didn't need a mother now, she had her mentor.
But Dinah had to know that her mother was still alive, and that she would be by her side if she ever needed her. If Dinah wanted to get to know her, Carolyn would be there, not just a regret in her young life. Black Canary would leave New Gotham as soon as she talked to Dinah, it was not her city to protect anymore, there were already three heroes for that.
"Do you have everything ready?" she asked, daring the man in front of her to answer her in a negative fashion.
"Yes."
"Really? I don't like failures... really don't. And this is sooooo important to me, you know?"
"I understand it madam, and I guarantee you, everything is taken care of."
"Do you? You see, this is a question of both work and love... I haven't seen the beautiful white face of my Mistah J in quite sometime... Neither have I heard his infectious laughter or stroked his green hair, so I would be very, VERY disappointed if your little mission were to fail."
"It won't."
"You'd better make sure of that, or you're a dead man. Go away now." Without another word, the man left Dr. Harleen Quinzel's office. "Hang on Mistah J, Harley is coming..." she sang to herself.