A/n This is my newest most wonderful fic!! I have it completely outlined, so I should be able to update regularly. That may not happen though due to the fact I am extremely lazy, busy person.
This is semi-based off of my favorite book "The Blue Castle" by LM Montgomery. The plot is similar. I came up with this while walking around Paris today. So imagine on the Champ de Mars right up to the Eiffel Tower planning this out in my head. HEHE! Typical me! When I got back to the apartment I'm saying at (I'm staying here for a week, by the time I have this posted I will be back in London) I sat right down and outlined it on my computer. I just find it amusing that I was planning this out at the Eiffel Tower; I think that is hilariously characteristic of me.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I don't own the plot (or most of it), I just don't own anything. Got it? Good, cause I better start on with the story before I start depressing myself with this fact and fear you might soon fall asleep at my hideously long author's notes.
"The Dream Castle"
By marzoog
Chapter One
"An Hour of Reckoning"
Lily blessed the rain that fell drizzling on the panes of Four Privet Drive on the morning of her Twenty-Ninth birthday. Because it was raining she would not have to go to the annual family picnic that just happened to be on her birthday. Since she had turned Twenty-Five and was still was un-married no one would ever let her forget that she was an Old Maid and that she had not "fulfilled clan expectations". So her clan wasn't that blunt, but you could see it in their eyes and actions.
There would be none of Uncle John's awful jokes she had heard a million times. She would not have to sit and listen to Aunt Jane openly criticize her with her biting comments on how Old Maids were thankfully so uncommon in the family. She would not have to see Petunia flaunt herself in front of all the Evans and show how she had accomplished all that was expected of her, while Lily was still an Old Maid and always would be. Thus Lily blessed this rain that had saved her from that.
It would not be known to her for many moons, but that rain had more to do with her future than she would have, could have, ever guessed. If it had not rained that awful May morning Lily's entire life would have been different. The fate of wizard kind would have been different.
Lily had lived with her widowed Aunt Gaulle and her hated "wonder girl" sister Petunia in a little brick box since she had graduated from Hogwarts. The whole house was shabby, but the upstairs rooms were even more so. Lily wished she would fix her little room up a little, but her Aunt shot down every meek suggestion of it. Lily didn't dare offend her Aunt. Long ago she had decided she would rather offend God than her Aunt Gaulle. God might forgive her, but her Aunt Gaulle certainly wouldn't.
In her family Lily was considered very dull and meek. She was called "little Dottie" because her freckles clashed horribly against her pale, almost pasty, skin. It was an old clan joke, and now had just become force of habit.
Lily had hated the nickname from the first time it had been used and hated it still. She liked her full name "Lillian" and even "Lily" was fine to her, but "Dottie" was just childish and mean. Especially for someone who was now Twenty-Nine. Of course her clan cast that up to her enough as it was, so Lily didn't say anything about how it bothered her. She never did. No one would have listened to her anyway.
Lily put her face against the window. The view from that window was so ugly it had always hurt her. It showed the plain brick semi-detached houses of the Privet Drive development. It all looked so ugly, so urban, and so hopeless.
Lily remembered when she had been a little girl and this was just being built how she had pitied the poor souls who would have to live in this awful monotony of tan brick. Ha! The irony of it all made Lily laugh bitterly.
Lily's laugh was always bitter, superficial or forced. Thus everyone commented on how "Dottie's" laugh was SO ugly maybe that's what drove away all the men. No one seemed to think that it could possibly just maybe be because she had never really had anything to laugh at.
Lily had never had anything to laugh at in the real world, but in her Dream Castle her laugh resounded constantly in the halls, drawing men like bees to nectar.
No one who knew Lily would have ever thought that she, so snubbed and meek in life, could produce something so beautiful and perfect as the Dream Castle in her daydreams. As a matter of fact few people suspected that Lily had daydreams.
If she closed her eyes Lily could always see its lovely diaphanous turrets and banners against the hills. It was an incarnation of all that was good, beautiful and perfect about the world. In it she was the most beautiful maiden of many and men died for her smile.
She was there, in essence, everything she was not in the real world. There she had love, for she had quite a few lovers in it, friends, and wealth. Just as she was clumsy, small, freckled, somewhat chubby and had too large of a chest in real life, there she was tall, graceful, slender, and perfectly proportioned. And beautiful! Scores of men lined her room just to get a glimpse of her.
Now she did only have one lover at a time, but gradually they faded out and a new one took their place after being wedded to her in the large chapel with pomp and circumstance. At twelve he had been curly haired, with finely chiseled features, at fifteen he had been a blond dream, at twenty he had been dependable and gruff looking than handsome, and very recently he had been tall with dark brown hair, chocolate eyes, glasses and a delicious grin. In the Dream Castle they conveniently faded out as she outgrew them.
But on this awfully rainy morning of fate she could not get into her Dream Castle. Reality was too pressing. Lily looked up to the chalky sky and realized that she was Twenty-Nine, ugly, unemployed, living with the most awful relatives in the world, and nobody even loved her. Who would? Her Aunt certainly didn't, Petunia hated her, Mother and Father were dead, and the rest of her clan just looked on her as a burden.
Lily had a very bitter moment as she realized she had nothing to live for, neither duty, love, purpose, friendship, and she had no future. There was few crimson or scarlet spot to light up her past and it looked like there would be none in her future. Her whole existence had been gray, and as far as she could look down it would still be. Gray… horribly gray. Nothing to brighten her life up or give any relief to the monotony of her boring and tedious days except her Dream Castle. And now to find that barred to her!
Lily could have cried, but didn't dare for two reasons: her sister would pound on the door soon and if she had red eyes they would be enquired after, Lily did not want to explain, secondly she was afraid that it would bring on another attack of dizziness. Lily had increasingly often had these moments when she seemed so weak she could hardly move and therefore she would become incredibly dizzy. It worried her some, but she figured it was just wariness. She had always been christened a "delicate" child.
That was the reason why she was aloud to sleep in until eight thirty, while her Sister and Aunt got up at eight on the button. She would have to get up at eight thirty in order to be on time to breakfast at nine. Breakfast at nine, lunch at two, diner at six, year in and year out were the rule at Mrs. Fredrick Gaulle's house. No exceptions. Lily hated the monotony, but she couldn't protest. She never did, of course.
The meals were always something Lily hated, for two reasons, she always had than one reason to hate things, but it was mean to list more than two: the first being that the meals themselves were of "filling" things such as porridge, which lily detested, the second was that every morning her Aunt gave her this stare she reserved for Lily and lily alone. It always seemed to say, "Don't you go against me you ungrateful Old Maid, and that means get a job and go move into your own house." Lily loathed that stare more than anything in the world, it always made her feel worthless and always put her in a sour mood right away in the morning.
It could almost make Lily sick to think of the difference of those meals and the ones she used to have with her Mother and Father. Her Mother would always manage to make something wonderful out of their meager resources. And they would smile at Lily over the table, and always manage to make her feel special. They had never criticized her and they never made her feel like a trespasser.
Everything had been fine when she had had her parents. They had always supported her through Hogwarts and life, teaching her life's little lessons. Then they had been killed by Voldemort. Lily's world had gone black then, staining the rest of her memories gray with them. Leaving her in a world of gray dust and monotony where no one wanted her and she wanted no one. It wasn't fair. Nothing in Lily's life had been fair.
She recalled her whole life, everything she could think of. The injustices of it all made her catch her breath. So many times she had been rebuked, chided, scolded, and criticized for things she hadn't done.
Like the time when she had put on a party for Petunia's graduation from school. She had wanted lovely Japanese lanterns and little fairy lights. Aunt Gaulle had told her that would look ridiculous and she shouldn't think of it. Aunt Gaulle had insisted on these awful streamers and balloons. When Petunia saw it she shrieked and ran to her room. Everyone had blamed Lily. That had been eleven years ago, but Lily could feel the hatefulness and spite of it all running through her veins at that very moment.
Or when she had thought that Cody Jameson liked her in a romantic way eight years ago She had been invited to a dance by him and she thought he might kiss her, as she often heard girls were. She had thought she had looked almost pretty in her green dress that brought out her eyes. The whole dance he spent looking around for someone (she hadn't been able to see who), trying to steal her from her partner. He had only danced once with Lily. She remembered all of the tears she had shed on her pillow. She had decided to confide in Petunia for once, as she heard sisters sometimes did, and all she had done was laugh.
"Aw, yes, I remember him…he was always staring at me. I think he wanted a dance with me. He certainly tired to cut in on Vernon quite a few times."
So he had been chasing after her the whole time and now Petunia admitted it with a laugh that gave the impression that it didn't matter much. That was the first and last time she brought her troubles to her sister.
That had been eight years ago, but Lily was still furious about it. Petunia had probably forgotten all about him, but Lily never had. Petunia always got what Lily wanted. Petunia had love, she was engaged to Vernon Dursely after several "disappointments", she had oodles of friends, and everybody loved her. Lily had to restrain herself from going down and punching Petunia right then and there.
Lily had been overjoyed when she had gotten into Hogwarts; she thought it would be a lot of fun and that she could make some friends. Best of all Petunia would not be there! But when Lily had gotten there she had found even acquaintances scarce and that she was always being left a little on the outside.
Petunia had made friends with the people at Hogwarts when she came to visit right away. She had even gotten a few admirers. And she made it more than up by telling them all that Lily was a "freak" and should be treated as such. The only person who had either not ignored her or teased her had been Hagrid, the groundskeeper. Sure, not everyone had been mean and they hadn't meant to ignore Lily, it just happened. Lily was often ignored.
Lily realized that now she had to get up, for it was eight-thirty. And sure enough Petunia knocked on her door in a hurried fashion that seemed to say.
'You lazy bones, you're good for nothing. We have already been up and doing all the work for you. And you're ungrateful!"
Lily shook her fist at the door.
As Lily got dressed she looked over herself critically in the mirror. She was much shorter than the average height, and slightly chubbier as well. But her eyes were like emeralds her their sockets. Her red hair was as thin and straggly as ever, but it was still the color of cinnamon. Her eyebrows were slanted oddly around her eyes, like a half circle. She didn't look beautiful, or exactly pretty, but sort of insignificant looking. Lily put down the mirror, sighed at what she had seen, and trudged down the stairs,
At breakfast the conversation was the same. Lily didn't even bother to try and change the topic because she knew what the answer would be. The conversation was as planned as a script, and there might be other scenes, but every one had been played out. Lily felt no surprise at the mention of "that young rapscallion Sirius Black and his odd friend James Potter".
Sirius Black was always being brought up. He was a wizard, Lily knew, and had gone to school with her. She had barely had two conversations with the man. He seemed nice enough, though somewhat loud and dreadful
As for James Potter he had only moved into the area five years ago and she had only seen him once. They had bumped into each other; he had smiled and let her pass. So even though he was a drunkard and a possible criminal she couldn't believe he was bad. No one with a smile like that could be completely bad, no matter what they had done.
Lily boredly listened on, reciting her lines. She was so sick of it all. She was so sick of everything. She was not of any importance to anyone.
"I think I'll go and clean the attic." Was the only thing she managed to say shortly as she walked up the steps. Cleaning the attic would be better than listening to her Aunt and Petunia prattle on. After doing that they couldn't ram her about not doing anything today, and how Old Maids were SO unproductive.
Lily had no idea, but she was playing right into fate's hands.
A/N That's it for now! Note on James, Lily doesn't know it's the same James Potter from Hogwarts. She's only seen him once, and she didn't really know James that well, so it's understandable.
Yes, the poor thing has had a bad life. Poor Dear!
If you read this please review!!!!! I really love reviews! And they inspire me to write faster!!! I only post a new chapter when I have five reviews for it, that's my rule.
And would someone, for the love of writing and all things holy, review the third chapter for my fic "Nothing Endures but Change"!!!!!! Its gotten no reviews!!! AH!!!!! That depresses me!!
Well, have a great day!!!
Your most Minnesotan of authors
aka IAMVALANCY
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