[Chu Chu Rocket, Phantasy Star Online, Chuih, ChuBei, ChuPea, ChuBach, KapuKapu, Chu Chu, and all other related indicia to either PSO or CCR are copyright Sonic Team and SEGA. Some Cu Chu characters copyright MFZ team (which is me, Hypes)]
Hunter Chuih, Ranger ChuBei, and MAG the mag, were in the belly of the beast, so to speak. They were so incredibly deep inside the ancient alien ship that I doubt even the society can save them now. They had descended into the casket, the final preparation, the last resort. Ruins 3. Organs, mucus, slime, webbing, and overall anatomical lingo could be used to describe the scenery. Yes, they were, indeed, inside the belly of the beast.
"So this is the home stretch, eh? Looks like EON from the masterpiece, FINAL FANTASY: EON." ChuBei discerned.
"ChuBei! Sometimes I wonder about you. If you're going for the gold, go ahead and say it!" MAG commanded.
"Oh alright. If you enjoy this fic (or if you don't), you should read other pieces like FINAL FANTASY: EON, PIRATES OF HEAVEN, AN EGGMAN CAROL, I ALSO SING IZAMIER, MEL THE PONY, CAPTAIN CETRA AND THE CETRATEERS, GALCIAN'S THE LOOPER, YOU'RE A MEAN ONE MOJO JOJO, and FINAL FANTASY EON II: DAYS OF ASHES. Make sure to review them as well!" ChuBei lectured.
"You know, I read somewhere that you're supposed to simply say said." Chuih commented.
"It's not my fault, it's the narrative." ChuBei replied.
"So anyways, Let's get this final run over with!" MAG …said.
"Make sure to use the comma!" Chuih commanded.
"…So anyways, Let's get this final run over with!", Mag said. "Better?"
"Yes. Let's Mosey!" Chuih finished.
The trio burst into the flesh crawling room. With precision and power, they immediately set to the destruction of the monsters in order to save Red Ring ChuPea, and halt the darker force. When the deed had been done, the doors unlocked and a message machine blipped into life.
"I want to run away! But I have no place to return to… Perhaps no one will ever find this message and listen to it. Ever… Blue Rocket2 will not come down when they discover that this planet is dangerous. Will somebody from Blue Rocket 2 still come to save us? Who knows? Regardless, I leave this message here. This is evidence of my existence."
"Boy talk about depressed. She needs a hug." Chuih said.
"I need a hug." ChuBei sighed.
"Yea, all this killin' is getting to me. WHY CAN'T WE ALL GET ALONG?!" MAG screamed a blood-curdling plea.
"Jeebus dude! If you need one that badly…" Chuih raised an eyebrow, despite the fact he had none. In a matter of moments, the three were engaged in a group hug.
"Ahh! There, now I feel much betta yo!" ChuBei smiled.
"Betta like butta, brotha!" MAG grooved.
And so the three traversed into the next room, and then the room after that, and then the room after that. But soon, in a dark room, the three had to stop for something… not good!
"Hey! I think that's a Chu chu! HEY LADY!" Chuih called out.
From the darkness emerged a female Force chu chuette. She was slow, a blank expression on her face, and she acted like a super atomic robot zombie man! "…So …cramped. In this dern coffin for …1000 years. You gotta help me sir! BWAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The Force let loose a volley of Razonde without warning. Mag took a hit and clunked to the floor.
"Dah! Like, MAG! Hey you crazy beoch! Listen up! We dun have time fer your games! Now shu' up!" ChuBei then slapped the chu chuette in the face.
"Oh datz it honey! Time for an ass whuppin!" The Force called back. She then leaped upon ChuBei and proceeded to scratch his eyeballs out. They two hissed and spat as they rolled around in the background. Chuih was going to intervene when he heard a familiar voice beckoning.
"…Co-----ome o------va he-------re…." The voice said. Geez, what did you think it was gonna say?
Chuih vanished into the darkened tunnel, to appear on the other side in a lone room. Dim was its sight and close was its feel.
From the darkness, a familiar face emerged. ChuBachs face. The android hunter who had presumably been slain trying to save Chuih from the De Rol Le a ways back.
"Chi-ChuBach! I thought you were dead! …well, not really, but it makes this scene much more dramatic." Chuih gasped.
"HoW LonG Has iT Been since wE lASt meT, ChUih?" ChuBach said in a sinister, wicked, and all around quicker pace than normal.
"What's with the random capaitlization?! What a second! You're not ChuBach! What have you done with ChuBach?!" Chuih concluded.
"ThErE NeVer WaS a ChubAch. I aM KiReEk! The BlAcK HoUnD! BlAcK PaPEr is Dead and I CoMe Now For Your SoUl! RePLaCe My BLUe ROCket 1 riVAL and LeT Me EAT YouR Soul!" ChuBach, or Kireek, swung his new weapon. It was a long photon scythe, the appropriately named SOUL EATER!
Chuih dodged the attack by a small margin by doing a back flip. Chuih brandished his Pallasch +6 (Trigrinders baby!) and struck a pose.
"So it's come to this, eh Kireek? I never thought I'd have to fight you, because I was thinking about hot babes. So let us fight!" Chuih rushed forward, striking his blade against the SOUL EATER's photonic edge. Sparks exploded from the ceiling paneling. Kireek forced his attacker off and flipped sideways to the edge of the circle. He breathed in and out rather heavily. "The Force is strong within this boy!"
Chuih leaped into the air, spinning like a drill with Pallasch out. Kireek jumped straight up as Chuih exploded into the dark hall side. The tow turned towards each other and rushed, striking each others' weaponry over and over. Each was just too good for the other. The humming of the photon blades interrupted the corrupt silence, as did the rain of sparks. Kireek finally let loose of the deadlock by kicking Chuih in the stomach. Chuih fell backwards. Kireek swung the SOUL EATER.
"GAH! My HAND! YOU CUT OFF MY BLOODY HAND!" Chuih screamed.
"…You never had a hand. You're a Chu chu…" Kireek had to explain.
"That's right." Chuih was about to get up when he noticed the SOUL EATER's edge in his face.
"Don't move vermin! After I swallow your tasty soul, I'll take the land as I did Blue Rocket 1 and Osto! LET THE BLOOD RAIN FROM THE SKY!" Kireek shouted at the top of his android lungs. Great flapping noises were heard in the background as the hall suddenly lit up. It turned out that this hallway was a balcony hallway, high over a pitch -black pit. And rising from this pit was the double tailed dragon.
"Uh, Kireek. Look behind you….really." Chuih nodded towards the dragon.
"Oh please! Do I look that gullible?! Is gullible written on my face? Come on! That's the oldest trick in the book! You can't fool anyo-" Kireek was cut off when the Dragon lunged it's craned neck over the balcony railings and snapped Kireek in its jaws. The SOUL EATER fell to the ground. The dragon flicked its head into the air, swallowed the android, and roared.
"I tried to warn him. Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing I saw the D&D Movie…" Chuih thought.
ChuBei walked into Chuih's area, followed by a bruised MAG. "Hey dude! I think that crazy chick was possessed! After a broke her nails, she vanished into nothing!" ChuBei finally noticed the growling dragon. "Uh…Chuih…run!"
"EEP!" Chuih said as the dragon nearly bit his tail off. The three ran to the nearest door and shut out.
"How many times are we going to run into that thing?!" ChuBei huffed.
"I dunno. Let's keep going." Chuih said.
"Hey! Here's a message machine!" MAG summoned the other two.
"Dark Falz! That's the name. Who could forget such a famous mistranslation? The god of destruction that revives in the millennial cycle. Perhaps this entity encountered a civilization thousands of years ago. They could not defeat it, but managed to seal it in this gigantic spaceship. They abandoned it somewhere far from their planet. It was this place, Ragol. …We've come to a terrible place at the worst possible time… " ChuPea's voice echoed.
"I'm guessing that this Dark Falz is a bad thing…" ChuBei said. The other two just looked at him.
The group ran through another large portion of the crypt labyrinth, fighting off angry enemies. Gaining more EXP and getting ever closer to the bad-ass mother Dark Falz! They soon ran across another, less informative but ACTUAL CHARACTERIZATIONAL message.
"I miss my father. I wasn't a very good daughter… was I? Is my father OK now? I hope he is, so he can get me that car he was talking about…Oh! I'm being shallow and petty again! Teehee. I didn't mean it. I really do miss my father, Principal Tyrell."
And from the air came a whisper. "That's Me."
"That's freaky. How does he do that?" Chuih thought.
"I don't know. How bout we continue, this scene's boring." MAG said.
And to make a long description short, they did. But they soon found themselves several battles more victorious and another message. This time confirming what we've been guessing the whole time. Dark Falz is indeed Dark.
"Dark Falz is a consciousness. He's like Jimminy Cricket, except not as cute and not a cricket. This entity, Dark Falz, not Pinocchio's friend, has no body." ChuPea said again.
"So Dark Falz has no body. How bad can that be? He can't hurt us if he has no body." Chuih said.
"True, true. But listen to this." MAG said as he motioned to a second machine.
"Don't let it come in. The dark consciousness looks for the best animal to obtain its temporal host body. So just say NO to Dark Falz pressure!" ChuPea spoke again.
"I'm guessing we're getting close, seeing how there's all these warnings and ChuPea's getting more lines than normal." Chuih noticed.
"You sure are!" Came a strange voice. The three turned to see a Chaos Sorcerer.
"Damnit it all! How many times do we have to fight you stupid guys!" MAG moaned.
"Listen you hunk of bolts. I'm not here to fight, kapeesh? I'm here to inform you!" The Sorcerer spoke.
"Umm…K." The space mice stated.
"Alright. Dark Falz is indeed an unattached entity. Here's the story. A thousand years ago, the people on my world were attacked by this divine monster. Our people were highly skilled in magic, so they were able to imprison him! They put him on a ship and were about to send it out when… Some idiot thought up the point that since it's a spaceship and since it's on auto pilot, some moron could find the ship and send it back. So to stop people from doing just that, the magical morons summoned all the aberrations you see here to protect the ship." The sorcerer explained.
"So why does everything look like a friggin' Christmas tree?" Chuih asked.
"Well, you see. All of us here are dead. You may have noticed that already. Those summonin sickos on our world brought us from the land o' the dead to watch this dumb ship. And since we were summoned, we have to do what the 'crown', or the guys who summoned us, say. And in the land of the dead, everything is all shiny and electric. Sort of like a morbid Las Vegas."
"So if you're all dead people, why do you look like dumb Christmas tree monsters?" ChuBei asked.
"Well, when you die, the god of death, which is NOT Dark Falz –he's the god of destruction-, turns you into one of his little people. You know in Grandia II when Ryudo died and turned into a Valmar Young?"
"…Yea…" the space mice said.
"Well it's like that. So back to the point. We're all dead zombie slaves to the lost crown. Need anymore information?" The Sorcerer finished.
"Yea! You know anything about the whole Doc Osto thang?" MAG asked.
"Nope! Haven't heard a word. The girl that went into Dark Falz's tomb might know."
"Cool. Thanks zombie sorcerer!" Chuih said.
"No problem. You get bored killing so many people. Toodles."
The Space Mice entered the last hallway and stumbled upon the last machine.
"The door is already opened. We opened it. This may be the beginning of the end of our universe. We have to do something… We must do it. We have to defeat it now! Defeat it before that dark "thing" revives with the perfect body. Quickly! Start some inspirational music! That means kill Dark Falz before he kills all of Blue Rocket 2 and anything else in the universe!" ChuPea ordered.
"Man! There's a good chance that we might be killed in der. I'm not sure I wanna go!" Chuih complained.
"Ya gotta dude! Don't you hear the inspirational music! If we don't every hot chick will cease to be hot, as in they die!" ChuBei replied.
"You're right! FOR THE BAES!" Chuih bellowed.
"FOR THE BABES!" ChuBei repeated.
"…It's also good writing that characters get smarter over the coarse of a story…Oh well. FOR THE BABES…and everything else!" MAG sighed as they entered the final red teleporter.
** *