Love Remains 6.
~~~~~~~
by girl_starfish
The journal was updated sporadically, but easy to read. Shigure had had very tidy handwriting and a fluent writing style. Tohru and Yuki sat on the bed with the book in front of them.
"I think he was thirteen or so when he wrote the first entry, but he's 17 for the later ones—it would have helped if he'd dated these but I suppose he didn't think anyone would be reading this," Yuki said.
"Should we be?" Tohru said. "It is his journal after all—"
"I don't think he'd mind," Yuki said. "It's not that sort of journal."
Reassured, Tohru turned to read.
Journal of Souma Shigure.
1st entry.
You know, its funny but if I hadn't fallen off the gazebo roof I wouldn't have known this house was haunted at all. See if I hadn't broken my arm then I would have gone roller skating with everyone else at Tomohiro's party, and if I could go skating, then his mother wouldn't have brought along a book of ghost stories so I wouldn't be bored, and if I hadn't read the book, then I wouldn't have know we have a ghost.
I mean, yeah, I knew it was weird that no-one ever talked about the way the upstairs drawing room is sometimes messed up, and that the master bedroom is always locked, and that no one ever mentions the woman in the garden. Ayame and Hatori think I'm being stupid, but they've never seen her.
I have. I think I was 4 the first time. Or maybe I was 6? 6 is more likely. I don't remember much about her except that she seemed sad. I could tell that much from a distance. What I do remember is lunch that day. We're all sitting around eating, and I ask "Who was the woman in the garden?"
Ayame says "What woman?"
"You know," I said. "The woman by the gazebo. With the really long hair and the weird clothes." I realise that the grownups are looking at me. "What?"
Ritsu (he was still living with us at this time) asked me, "what kind of clothes?"
"A long dress," I said. "With lots of lace and fluffy stuff. Like in the photo albums."
My father stood up, his chair making a loud screeching noise. "Go to your room now, young man!"
"But I haven't done anything!" I said. "I was only asking a question!"
"You will go to your room right now and stay there," my father said.
I had to stay there until after tea. My mother brought me my meal in my room. "Shigure, honey," she said. "Has anyone been telling you stories about this house and the people who used to live here?"
"No," I said sulkily. "I don't see why I'm in trouble—I didn't do anything, she did!"
"Honey, we do not ever mention her, okay? Forget about her," my mother said kissing me goodnight. "Remember—not a word about her to anyone."
I think I saw her twice since. Once on my 8th birthday, and the other one day when I was home sick from school. In all that time she hasn't changed the slightest bit—she hasn't got older, even her dress is the same. So she must be a ghost, right?
Its past my bedtime so I have to go now. I'll write some more soon.
2nd entry.
Stupid Hatori. I am in so much trouble because of him. He just had to go and tell his dad what I was doing. The adults all yelled at me and I had to stay in my room all last night. And I've been grounded. This really sucks because I was going to go to the movies with Yama-kun, we'd even got tickets and everything. Now Aya's going instead of me. It's so not fair!
Luckily they didn't find my journal. I was hiding it in the library—no one's going to look for a book among all those books, right? But since it looks as though I'm going to be grounded a while I'm going to hide it in my room from now on.
I'm too mad to want to write. Stupid Hatori. Just for that I'm not going to tell him what I know about Ritsu.
3rd entry.
Still grounded. Since I'm being punished, I figure I ought to deserve it though. I don't get what is so bad about thinking the house is haunted. I mean, it explains a lot doesn't it? The woman in the garden, the upstairs room, the locked door—
Real paranormal investigators write down any inexplicable phenomenon they encounter, so that's what I'm going to do. I've already done the woman in the garden so I guess it's the upstairs drawing room's turn.
The first time it happened was when I was eleven. When we came home from school we found mother sitting in the kitchen trying to comfort Aunty Lin who was crying. When I wanted to know what happened I was told to go play in the garden. Ayame and Hatori also thought this was strange. The adults were all very grim and Hatori even got yelled at for walking quietly, if you can believe that. I mean, no-one ever yells at perfect Hatori. Anyway Aya said he needed a book in his room for his homework so he was allowed upstairs.
He said that our fathers were sweeping broken glass out of the drawing room, that the whole room had been trashed. There was a doctor leaving, and Aya overheard him telling Hatori's dad that he'd given Ritsu a sedative, and that it should last him through the night. This was right before Ritsu got 'sick' so we thought maybe he was the one who messed up the room. But it happened again, after Ritsu went into hospital so it couldn't have been him.
Quite a lot of times people have heard thumps from that room and gone up to find there was no one there, at times when no one else could have been in the house. No one will talk to us about it though because they think we're children. No one uses the room anyway, not after what happened to Hiro.
The adults won't tell us about that either. It was sports at school and we were playing soccer when Takaishi-sensei came and called me, Ha-san and Aya out of the game. We were taken to the office where our mothers were waiting for us. They'd come to tell us that Hiro was dead.
I don't remember what happened exactly after that, but we weren't taken home. I went to stay at Tomohiro's house, and Aya and Ha-san went to Yamato's, until 'the arrangements had been made.' They weren't talking funeral arrangements either, Hatori said that he went back to get his science project that he'd forgotten and the driveway was covered with police cars and officers.
There was an accident, apparently. And the upstairs room just happened to be completely redecorated by the time we were allowed back. I mean, how dumb do they think we are?
I'm pretty certain that Hiro died in that room though, but I don't get how—I mean, he was 18 and healthy, and then he's dead. It couldn't have been natural though, and I think that explains the room. Hiro's haunting it.
Aya says that that is stupid, that ghosts are only people who have been dead for years and years. I don't know—I mean, those ghosts had to be people to someone too, you know? I mean, its just weird to think that Hiro is a ghost . . . I mean, he's my cousin. Was my cousin. Was/is—what is the correct tense for a ghost anyway?
Have to go soon. But anyway, that was the first time the furniture was pushed around and it wasn't the last. The adults have had all sorts of carpenters, feng shi specialists, interior decorators, plumbers, electricians, all sorts in there but no one can explain it. Eventually all the good furniture was shifted downstairs, and the room was pretty much left alone. No one notices the occasionally thump or crash, or if they don't mention it.
That last sentence sounds really sinister. I like it. Maybe I'll use it in a story sometime. Later!
4th entry.
Man, I'd totally forgotten about this old thing. The house has been pretty quiet on the supernatural front lately. Don't really have much to add except that I'm doing a family history project for school and thought I might find out a bit about our mysterious lady in the garden. We have to research one of our ancestors. Ayame and Hatori were bickering over who got to do Souma Asato and I was wondering who to do. My gaze fell on the gazebo, and I thought, why not? Of course, I have to figure out who the hell she is which is not easy as she a) 'does not exist and if you pursue this topic of conversation you will find yourself in your room young man' and b) well, none of the family histories actually mention the word ghost at all. Which makes it tricky. But I guess all I have to do is find a girl who died young about, I don't know—1900s? Of course people were always dying back then so I may not have much luck, but still—man, can you believe I didn't think of this before? The photo albums!
5th entry.
Success!
The ghost not only has a name, but she has a history too. Souma Rin, daughter of Asato's younger brother. She's quite a girl too, outstanding horsewoman, entered competitions against men and won. She had to compete secretly so she used her cousins' names. Worked very well for a while until the results of the competition were published in a paper and someone who knew the family and who knew that Akito was in no way healthy enough to ride a horse let alone win second place in a show jumping trial brought the article to the family's attention. She was promptly pulled out of school and sent home.
She doesn't seem to have done much after that. I imagine she was under pressure to behave and be a respectable Victorian chick. Or was that Edwardian?
Whatever. There's no record about the rest of her life at all—except for her death.
6th entry.
You know, maybe Hatori is onto something. Aya and I are never allowed up in the attic. I mention the words 'school project' and not only am I allowed in the attic, but I've even been given the keys to the family records in the downstairs study. So fun! I never knew that Hatori flunked a Biology test last year, or that Aya's teacher's sent home a letter complaining about his 'overly dramatic tendencies'. On the other hand, I think my last year's math results may have to undergo a little . . . 'accident.'
Not much on the ghost front, however. They didn't seem to have birth or death certificates in Rin's day. What they did have, however, were ball cards. Apparently Rin was something of a social butterfly. In amongst a whole bunch of girly junk—lace whatsits, invitations to balls etc, I found a whole bunch of these cards. Apparently the girl tied them to her fan and during the course of the evening, guys would come and request dances and she would note them down on the card so there was no confusion. Not like our school disco—man, that was funny. We had three girls tearing each other's hair out because they all wanted to dance with Ayame first. Ayame's solution? Rather than pick one and make the others feel bad, he decided to dance with Hatori instead. Poor Ha-san—I think his face stayed red for the rest of the evening.
Anyway, at first I thought it was just junk, but I noticed that Rin always had the first dance with her cousin, Souma Akito. Every single time. And although there were about 12 spaces for dances on each card, 2-6 were usually left empty—and then 8-12 would almost always be taken by someone who was just noted down as 'Haru.'
After reading a few girly novels with historical settings (just how many governesses ended up marrying Masters of huge fortunes and immense social stature anyway?) I'm pretty certain that the first dance was the crucial one, and I'm fairly sure that Akito was courting Rin. Thing is, I'm starting to suspect she preferred the mysterious 'Haru.' There's a ball invitation that looks perfectly innocent until you open it and find 'the gardens at ten. Please come. I long to speak to you in private' has been written on the inside cover.
I also found what I think is a promise ring among her belongings. 'My love, to keep with me always'~Souma Akito. Somehow I don't see that going down well with Rin—she strikes me as the independent type. Hey, I wonder if she was a suffragette? Might explain why the family is so down on her—Soumas are respectable. We have an image to maintain. We do not make waves. We do as we are told for the honour of the family. Blah blah blah ad nauseum.
7th entry.
Cannot find anything about this Haru guy. Maybe it was a nick-name? Heck, maybe it was a girl? That would go down even less well with the family. Maybe she died so that she wouldn't embarrass the family? Maybe I'm getting carried away by my overly active imagination again. After all we're Souma's, not the Mafia.
Amusing mental image of Hatori's dad carrying a machine gun with him to the office notwithstanding, I need some facts. Where to get them?
8th entry.
I'm taking back all the mean stuff I ever said about Ha-san! He so rocks!
Conversation:
Me: Stupid assignment! Stupid teachers! Stupid damn family!
Ha-san: (long suffering sigh) Something wrong, Shigure?
Me: I can't find anything about Rin that actually tells me about her life! I mean I can tell you what her favourite dances were, the name of her horse, but I don't know how she died or why or anything like that!
Ha-san: Does it matter? You only have to do a brief sketch of their life and accomplishments.
Me: But she died so young! That's kind of an accomplishment—anyway, can you see Mizukaki-sensei marking my assignment and not wanting to know why she died so young?
Ha-san: Have you looked in the family tree?
Me: There's nothing there—actually . . . did you know that there's been a name on that page just crossed out totally?
Ha-san: Someone vandalised the family records?
Me: It's too neat—they did it really carefully too, so it wouldn't damage the other pages. Whoever it was must have been alive at the same time as Rin-chan.
Ha-san: (withering glare) Rin-chan?
Me: Well, she is really cute.
Ha-san: (going back to book) I do not want to know what goes on in what passes for your brain.
(friendly scuffle ensues)
Mother: Boys. Aren't you supposed to be doing homework?
Me: I caaaaaan't! I have nothing to go on!
Ha-san: Well, if you're really stuck you could go in to the lawyers.
Me: Eh?
Ha-san: They keep copies of all the family documents. They even have the original family tree—the one in the lounge is just a copy you know.
Me: Ha-san! I love you!
Ha-san: Get off me, you twit!
Anyway, I had to wait until after soccer practice today to go to the lawyer's—they're in town you know. Lucky I can forge Uncle's signature, they wouldn't let me look at the family vault without permission even though I am one of the family. Can you believe we have a vault?
Anyway, I think I've really hit the jackpot here. Rin was murdered, and so was Akito—I can't believe I never noticed they died on the same day. I can't decide whether Akito found out about Haru and tried to kill her, or whether Rin got fed up with his possessiveness and killed him. Either works. And I finally managed to find the mystery guy. You won't believe this—he was Rin's cousin. Souma Hatsuharu. It has to be him, right? Kind of weird, the girl being loved by both her cousins although I guess Victorians didn't really get out much.
9th entry.
I am so getting an A for this project. I spent five hours today at the town library, sitting in the basement, on a Saturday, with no natural light and no food. My fingers are stained black from ink and my eyes hurt from all the reading of fine print I did. But its worth it!
I had to spend ages pouring through old newspapers and legal reports. There was practically nothing in the papers about, aside from a mention of the sad loss of the Sohma family. I guess the family would have used the Sohma influence to cover it up. But the court reports had a more complete account.
Not only were Rin and Akito murdered, but they tried Hatsuharu for the muder. Apparently the announcement of Rin and Akito's engagement drove him over the edge, and he was determined to make sure they would never be together. He was seen leaving the house at the time of the murder, blood on his clothes and that, and Akito lived long enough to accuse him so it really wasn't much of a trial. He was hung a month later.
I don't know—something about it feels wrong for me. Maybe it's just that I don't want Rin's lover to have turned out to be bad. I guess I sympathise with her, the whole being restricted by the family thing. I can't wait till I'm old enough to move out of here! Of course, Rin had it a lot worse. Being a girl she couldn't actually make a lot of her own decisions. She couldn't get engaged without the permission of the family head, she couldn't go out, hell, she couldn't even buy a dress without having to ask permission first (there were a couple of requests of clothing and money in among the accounts at the lawyer's office). And guess who the head of the family was? None other than Sohma Akito, of course.
Seems slightly fishy to me . . . then again, maybe I'm spent too much time reading detective novels.
I'm going to write up my report now. A-central, here I come!
10th entry.
I hate this family! I can't believe they did this!
The bastard burned my report!
This morning, we're about to go to school. Aya and Ha-san and I are just about to leave and Uncle Tatewaki stops us at the door and says, "Shigure, can I have a moment?" He takes me into the downstairs study and says, "I've noticed you've been putting a lot of effort into this report of yours. Can I see it?"
Totally clueless, I handed it over.
He flicks through it frowns, puts it down, takes his glasses off, looks at me and says "This won't do."
"What?" I said.
"I know you meant well, Shigure, but understand this is something that should be kept in the family." He picked up my report and put it in his briefcase. "You may leave now."
"But—my report!" I said. "I have to hand it in—"
"I'm sure your teacher can be persuaded to grant you an extension," he said, coolly, standing up. "If there is any difficulty, ask her to phone me at my office."
I saw red then, I really did. "Who the hell do you think you are? You can't tell me what I can and can't do!"
"I am," he said, with the superior air that always bugs me in Hatori, "the head of the Souma family, in case you'd forgotten, and you Shigure, are a Souma. As long as you are under this roof, you abide by our rules."
"What 'our' rules? Far as I can see, you make the rules and the rest of us have no say at all!" I yelled back.
"I can understand that you'd be upset about this," Tatewaki said, starting to sound annoyed. "But there is no excuse for your rudeness. Go to school right now."
"You bet I'm going to school," I said. "And I'm going to tell Mizukaki-sensei exactly why I wasn't allowed to hand my project in."
Tatewaki slammed the briefcase onto his desk. "That's it. You're going to your room right now, young man!"
He hauled me all the way upstairs and locked me in the room himself. I think I'm going to have bruises from where he was holding my arm. Aya and Ha-san had decided to wait for me at the door, and they saw it. Aya looked so scared, like he thought I was going to get killed or something. I don't blame him, I've never seen Uncle look this mad. It I hadn't been so angry at him, I would have been terrified. I think I heard Uncle yelling at them after he went downstairs so they must have stuck around. I hope they're not in trouble because of me.
Damn, I hate him!
He went to work twenty minutes later. I saw him stop the gardener on his way out the gate, and give him some instructions. Shortly afterwards, the gardener made a bonfire of the old branches and that, and I saw him feed a pile of papers into the fire. Three quesses what that was.
I hate him so much! I can't wait till I'm old enough to leave this prison. Soon as I finish high school I'm going far away and never coming back.
11th entry.
Surprising new developments. I finally have an account of someone else's encounter with the ghost. There's a kid who lives in the house across the river, Kyou, and he's been coming over to play with us quite a bit these holidays. He's a neat kid, very plucky, won't take nonsense from anyone. He's made himself part of the family, and gets on well with Kagura and Momiji, well, more Momiji than Kagura if I'm going to be honest. Doesn't daunt Kagura in the slightest—my little cousin has a crush! It's so funny! Aya's started calling him 'Shigure's pet,' which annoys him and he's not slow letting us know about this.
Anyway, Kyou came over this afternoon to play. Hatori and I were in the downstairs study. He was trying to explain physics to me, I was complaining copiously. Aya interrupted to tell us that Kyou had come by to visit me, but Ha-san wouldn't let us talk. I heard some screaming a short while later so I assumed that Kagura had found him. Ha-san hit me with the physics textbook before I could find out what was going on—"You're not leaving this room until you can give me all the rules giverning light refraction and explain each of them."
By ten thirty I was almost asleep and Hatori was forced to admit that it was a lost cause.
"I just don't understand," he said, as we climbed the stairs to our rooms. "You're intelligent—when you apply yourself you can get really good marks. So how can you be so bad at this?"
"Maybe physics just isn't one of my strong points," I said. "Just like some people are really bad at biology, physics is my weakness—"
Ha-san glared at me suspiciously but I just smiled innocently at him. It was then I heard the noise.
It was a deliberate thump, like someone shifting furniture or something. Much like the sounds we'd heard from the upstairs drawing room (shifting floorboards—yeah, right) but it sounded as though it was coming from the attic.
"Did you hear that?"
"Hear what?"
"Sounds as though someone's in the attic," I said, turning away from our rooms.
"It's locked Shigure—no one would be up there at this time of night," Hatori said.
"But I know I heard something," I said, trying the attic door. It was locked. I peered through the keyhole, but couldn't see anything in the darkness beyond. Then there was a noise that I recognised—a sleepy murmur. Believe it or not, Kyou had somehow managed to lock himself inside the under the stairs cupboard. He was rather relieved to be let out, having been there all day. The really interesting thing though is that he said that a woman talked to him while he was in the cupboard—took care of him, told him it would be all right. Moreover, he was asleep when we first came upstairs—the noises in the attic weren't made by him.
As far as I know, no one has ever noticed noises from the Attic before. Since Kyou said it was a woman and he seems pretty sure about it, I guess it has to be Rin, though I wonder what she's doing inside. I've never seen her anywhere but the gazebo. I'd like to ask Kyou what she sounded like, but I don't think his father is going to let him come over again. I was really surprised to see that Takeshi was living in our neighbourhood. I guess we all just kinda assumed that he would be with Kisa—wherever she is. I'm worried about that actually. I was too little at the time to understand what was going on, but I gathered that Kisa liked Takeshi a lot, and that was where the trouble started. That the family objected, and that she ran away—but I'm confused. We all thought she ran away to be with him, and Kyou looks like her, but he told me he's never met his mother. Kisa is not the sort of person to do something like that—so has something happened to her? I hope like hell she's okay. She was a lot older than us, but she was kind to me, Ha-san and Aya.
12th entry.
Okay, I think I now understand what people mean by the expression 'scared shitless.' Aya and I just had the most terrifying experience of our lives. We were walking home from Tomo's party, a little inebriated if you must know. Okay, maybe not just a little. I was occupied trying to keep Aya quiet as we walked down our street so we didn't notice him until we were right at the gate.
I was trying to find my key when this man stepped out of the shadows. Maybe man isn't the right word—he would have been our age, but he was wearing this suit that made him look older. That should have been the first clue, the suit was an old fashioned deal with waistcoat, tails and all of that—even a top hat which obscured most of his face.
"You can let me in," he said.
Aya and I stared at him.
"What the hell?" Aya said. "What makes you think we'd do that? And who are you anyway?"
"Let me in," the man repeated.
"He's probably drunk," I said, turning back to the gate. "Leave him, Aya."
The man's fingers closed around my wrist. "Let me in," he insisted, leaning close to me, close enough I could see the paleness of his neck, so pale it was almost white where his high collar had fallen away—except for the red imprint of the noose around his neck.
Hatsuharu.
I tried to jerk my hand away but he was holding it too tightly. His grip hurt. "Let me go!"
"Let me in!"
"Let go of Gure!" Aya tried to pry the man's fingers off my wrist. "What do you think you're doing, you psycho?" I could see his eyes widen at the coldness of the man's touch.
"I will never," said Hatsuharu, looking not at me, but at the house, "let go. Never!"
The driveway light flicked on, and we were momentarily blinded.
"Shigure—Ayame," Hatori called out. "What's wrong?"
"Can't you see?" Aya answered. "This nut just attacked Gure-kun!"
"He's gone," I said. For some reason I was sitting on the ground now. "He left with the light." I started laughing. I can't for the life of me work out what was so funny. I don't remember much after that until we were all sitting in the kitchen. Ha-san had made us sit down and had bandaged my wrist. He'd been waiting up for us, to make sure we didn't wake any of the others up as we came in.
"It was Hatsuharu," I said. "I know it was."
"Of course it was," Hatori said, putting a mug of chocolate in front of me, and spooning sugar into it. "Now drink this."
Aya pushed his chair back and stood angrily. "It's always Shigure, isn't it?"
"Settle down," Hatori said. "You're distraught."
"You always take care of him!" Ayame hissed, thumping the table. "You never worry about me this way!"
"Shigure is clearly in shock right now," Hatori replied, still calm and reasonable. "I'll make you something to drink in a minute."
"I don't want something to drink! I want—oh, I'm sick of both of you!" Aya stormed up the back staircase towards his room.
"Aya—wait!" Hatori started after him, but the slamming of the landing door told him he wasn't wanted. "Aya—"
We sat there in silence awhile.
"Ha-san," I began. "Don't you think you should check on him?"
"Don't worry about it," Hatori said. "Just make sure you finish your drink."
I looked down at the hot chocolate. "Aya . . . hasn't been himself for a while."
"I noticed—his behavior lately has been rather erratic. I'm worried about him," Hatori sighed as he sat down at the table.
I took a deep breath. This is the first time any of us had ever said it. "He loves you, you know."
Hatori looked away, his expression troubled. "I know. I regret it, but I don't feel the same way—but you shouldn't worry about this, Gure. I'll talk to Aya about it, this is up to us to sort out."
I nodded, taking a sip of chocolate. As I did, I glanced up towards the stairway that Aya had just vacated.
There was a boy there, slender and pale, dressed in dark clothes and watching us with an expression I can only describe as chilling. He met my eyes, smiled this smile that made my blood freeze, then turned to vanish amongst the shadows in the stairwell.
Ha-san told me I'd imagined it, I'd had a long night after all and that I should go to sleep and forget about it. I cannot get him out of my head though. That boy—this is the first time any of the ghosts in this house have made me feel frightened. I don't like it one bit.
13th entry.
Aya's dead.
I still can't believe it. Yesterday his was his usual irritating insane self, today . . .
I feel so guilty. I should have noticed he was gone earlier, I should have thought of looking by the willows sooner. Its nothing to what Ha-san's going through. He hasn't said much since we found him, but I think he thinks it's his fault.
It's really stupid too. It wasn't even that bad of an argument. He and his parents have had much worse. We're all so used to Ayame storming off somewhere to sulk, that none of us noticed he was gone until this morning. And he's climbed those trees for years and years without once having an accident. They think a branch gave way and he fell—I can't think about it.
Momiji's hovering outside my door. I think he's afraid I'm going to go somewhere too. Ha-san was the one who found him, so he's gone with the police and Aya's parents. I'm actually glad that none of the kids saw that. I don't think I'll ever forget it, I—
I can't believe that woman! She's just gone off and left Yuki here all by himself! No wonder the kids are so upset. I mean, just think of how scary this must be for all of them, especially Yuki. The argument last night was about him, I'm not sure he knows, but I suspect he might. And Momiji is absolutely terrified. I'd better talk to him.
14th entry.
Am I going insane? My best friend is dead and I'm wondering if it was altogether natural? Maybe I'm imagining things but I think something is seriously wrong with Ha-san. Not only that, it's like this entire house is going nuts. You can't walk into a room without getting snapped at. Yuki has practically stopped speaking, and his mother is threatening to walk out. The upstairs drawing room has not stayed quiet for more than three hours at a time, and the entire house just has this dark feeling to it—the adults are divided between those who want to stay and those who want to leave. When I woke up last night I heard Uncle Tatewaki trying to calm Aya's mother down. She was insisting that it was the house's fault Aya died—
I'm starting to wonder if she's right. I mean, there has been an awful lot of accidents in our family. And then there was what happened to Hiro—I need to find out the truth.
15th entry.
If Uncle Tatewaki ever finds out what I did today I would be grounded for life. I put my school uniform on, took my bag and told everyone I was going to school. The adults said I didn't have to—no-one is making Ha-san go to school either. He's spent the last few days just staying in his room. I said I needed to talk to people, and they let me go. I walked down to the bus stop, kept on walking and caught the number 9 bus to the train station.
The hospital Ritsu's in—or should that be an asylum?—is about an hour out of the city, so its close by, not that we're ever taken to visit. I wonder if anyone ever visits him at all. Probably not—I mean, a relative in a mental institute is not something the Sohma family wants to own.
He seemed a lot sadder than I remembered him, but a lot less tense than his last days at home. He didn't seem crazy either. I don't know what I was expecting, but he just seemed normal. He kept calling me by my father's name, which was weird though. Things were relatively normal, until I asked about Hiro's death.
Ritsu looked as though he wanted to run.
"It's important," I said. "I think Hatori might be in danger but I'm not sure—I need to know everything about how Hiro died."
"You don't know what you're asking," Ritsu said. "Please, Seiichirou, don't make me remember."
"Aya's dead," I told him. "You have to remember!"
He cried. I felt like such a jerk. But he told me.
I wish he hadn't.
Hiro's death was painful and horrible. Ritsu and the others heard his screams. They ran to help him, but the upstairs drawing room was locked and they could only listen. By the time they'd got the key it was too late.
Hiro died of multiple stab wounds—but he was alone in the room. No one went in or out and no weapon was ever found.
Ritsu was a mess by the time he'd finished. "I hear him when I sleep," he said. "Over and over—"
"I'm . . . sorry," I said, feeling the inadequacy of those words.
"He was ill tempered," Ritsu said. "But he never meant any real harm. And he loved her—whatever his faults were, he truly did love her."
"Kisa?" I asked.
He nodded sadly. "I know he never told anyone but I knew. How could I not? Hiro—"
"You were in love with Hiro," I said, in a flash of intuition.
He nodded. "I was. Seiichirou, I'm sorry, but I really don't feel up to answering any more questions—"
I'm on the train home now. I'm a little early, school won't be finished yet, but I need to talk to Ha-san. I've got this really bad feeling about this. Akito loved Rin, Rin loved Haru—all three of them died. Hiro was in love with Kisa, and Ritsu loved him—and Hiro's dead, and Kisa's gone who knows where, and Ritsu's in hospital. Aya loved Hatori—does that put him in danger?
16th entry.
Ha-san's going to be okay. The hospital says he'll be partially blind in that eye, but he's going to live. Tatewaki hugged me—he was crying, said that if I hadn't found him when I did—no, I can't think about that.
I think I understand though. It's the same tragedy, played out again and again. Hatsuharu, Rin and Akito—somehow they're at the centre of this. Unless it's stopped . . .
Hatori will be in danger as long as he lives in this house unless I do something. Uncle refuses to sell the house, so there's nothing I can do but try to convince Ha-san of the danger. He might listen to me, after all that's happened—or there's another option. It's risky, but it might work.
End of the journal entries.
"There's nothing else," Tohru said, turning over the pages.
"I think the last one was written the day before he died," Yuki said. "I'm not sure, no one will really tell me much about it. My parents had taken me and left the house by then, so I wasn't here."
"Do you think he's right?" Tohru asked hesitantly. "That what happened to Rin and Akito is at the centre of this?"
"I'm not sure," Yuki said. "Shigure obviously had thought about a lot—and he'd spent more time in this house than I have, but there's still a lot I want to know. It's the best theory we've got though—"
"But then again, theories were never Shigure's strong point."
Tohru and Yuki jumped. They'd been so intent in the journal they'd never noticed Hatori's approach. The older man, stood in the doorway, his expression dark and forbidding. "That appears to be a most interesting book," he said, holding his hand out to Tohru. "I must take a look at it."
There was nothing for Tohru to do but hand it over.
"I came upstairs to tell you two that it was time for dinner," Hatori continued.
In silence Tohru followed Yuki to the stairs.
"Hatori?" Yuki said as he reached the stairs and realised he wasn't following them. "Aren't you coming down to eat?"
"Give Honda-san my apologies," Hatori said. He hadn't moved from his position in the hallway, studying the journal cover intently. "I have a matter that requires my attention first."