Title: Elven Pon Farr
Author: Khylea
Rating: R for non-graphic sex
Characters: Aragorn/Arwen, Legolas as an observer, but it's not as kinky as you might expect
Archive: Sure, just drop me a URL where I can visit, please sl_chester@hotmail.com
Feedback: Would be divine. Good or bad, I'm not picky.
Time line: Shortly after Return of the King
Feedback: Would be divine. My first attempt at a humorfic in any fandom and I would like to know if I succeeded.
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters.........DUH!!! No money is being made though, so it's cool, okay?
Warnings: Slightly non-consensual sex,but only VERY slightly.
Summary: During her time of highest sexual drive, Arwen searches the palace for her husband. Who is concealing him from her?
Author's Notes: Okay, this fic shows exactly how out of hand a discussion can get on a LOTR list. It started out as a relatively intelligent discussion of how Elvish females can control their fertilityand thus can decide when to conceive. From there it rapidly went downhill with others suggesting that if they control their fertility, they can probably control their sex drive as well. Continuing downhill as someone else suggested "But wouldn't it be fun if there were times when Elves COULDN'T control their sex drives?" And me, also being a Star Trek fan, immediately has to write an Elvish Pon Farr story. (For those not familiar with Star Trek, every seven years, Vulcans, normally the picture of calm and self-control, have an overwhelming desire to mate. If they are denied this option, they often go insane. In extreme cases they can even die. So since Elves seem to have the same self-control as Vulcans, what if there were times that they also lost that self-control? Hence the premise for this story, with Aragorn being the unfortunate(?) victim.) Oh, and please don't flame me for how I portrayed Arwen, okay? I really do like her, I just needed SOMEONE to be out of control with desire. I don't REALLY see her like this. And besides, it's not like it's her fault or anything! :)
Legolas sat bolt upright in bed as the door to his room was opened and then quickly slammed. He stared into the frightened eyes of his friend Aragorn, rising from bed, preparing himself for whatever threat had terrified Aragorn so. He could not help but feel a little fear himself. There was little that frightened the former Ranger.The King's clothes were shredded, his hair in even more of a disarray than usual, and a thin trickle of blood ran from the corner of his mouth, disappearing into the dark brown beard.
"Elessar, what...." He began, immediately stopping as Aragorn leaped to his side, grabbing him by the shoulders and pinning him with a dark, frightened stare.
"Legolas, please....do not tell her where I am."
Legolas shook his head in confusion. "Do not tell WHO where....."
"ARAGORN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Both man and elf jumped at the shrill female voice echoing down the hallway, and Aragorn's eyes widened further, letting go of Legolas and glancing around the room like a trapped animal. Legolas instantly relaxed, realizing what the source of his friend's fear was.
"It is Arwen's time?" Legolas asked softly, fighting hard to keep down a smirk as Aragorn nodded quickly.
"You must hide me, Legolas. She is intent on killing me." Legolas could see the King's panic increasing as he heard another shrill shriek from his wife.
"ARAGORN!!!! I WILL FIND YOU!!!!"
"Quickly. Into the closet." Aragorn nodded, practically launching himself at the closet. Pressing himself as far back into the clothes as he could, he closed the door behind him and attempted to slow his panicked breathing. Legolas strode to the window and crossing his arms over his chest, looked out at the moon.
Though he was expecting it, he still jumped when the door to his room was again slammed open. He turned around slowly, carefully removing all traces of amusement from his face before allowing the Queen to see him. "Is there something I can help you with, my lady?"
"Do not patronize me, Legolas. I know he is here. Where is he?"
"To whom might you be referring?" He asked calmly.
"MY HUSBAND, YOU THICK HEADED EXCUSE FOR AN ELF!!!" She screamed at him, stalking toward him with daggers in her eyes.
"Ah yes. King Elessar. He was here earlier, but he left quite some time ago. I believe he said he was heading down to the stables."
"Do not lie to me, Legolas of Mirkwood. He is here. I can smell him." She dropped down to her knees and looked under the bed, then pushed the curtains aside and looked behind them. Turning a dark stare on Legolas, she finally glanced at the closet door. "I know you are in there, Elessar. Come out now before I drag you out."
When there was no response, she stomped toward the closet and flung the door open. Grabbing the first thing she found, which happened to be her husband's hair, she yanked him out into the room. "How DARE you run from me! Do you not see how much I need you?"
She shoved him up against the wall, and with a loud, animalistic growl, bit his neck hard enough to draw blood. Aragorn attempted to push her away, only to have her reach for what was left of his shredded tunic and rip it from his body. She grabbed his hands and pinned them against the wall as she kissed and bit down the center of his chest.
Aragorn looked in a panic to his friend, glaring as he realized Legolas was desperately fighting to keep his laughter under control.
"It would be best to let her do as she wishes, Aragorn. Fighting will only make it worse." He grinned as Arwen released her husband's arms for a moment, only to rip his pants from his body. His manhood shrunk up against his body as it was exposed to the cool night air. "Be thankful Elves only experience this burning of the blood every fifty years or so."
Aragorn attempted to hold himself upright as Arwen continued kissing and biting him, her mouth everywhere on his naked body. Perhaps Legolas was right. Let her have her way, get it over with. His loving, gentle wife should have returned by morning. But he could think of more private places to have a tryst with her. He attempted to pull her down the hallway, back toward their room, but she was having none of it, ripping off her own clothes and tackling him to the floor.
He glanced up at Legolas as his wife pinned him to the floor, glaring again at the smirk on the prince's face. She began stroking him intimately, and in spite of his embarrassment, his eyes closed in pleasure as his body finally began to respond. She saw he was ready and quickly straddled him, moving on him quickly, almost roughly. It didn't take long for her to reach her climax, and the feeling of her clenching around him drew his own from Aragorn.
For a long moment, they lay together, intimately entwined, the desperation in Arwen briefly at bay. But not for long, as she quickly rose to her feet and yanked him up as well. This time grabbing him by his beard, she pulled him toward the door. Aragorn looked back at his friend, and for the first time, Legolas could not control his laughter.
"Have fun, Aragorn!" He called after the human. The last look he saw before Aragorn was dragged bodily from the room was a glare promising certain death if Legolas revealed anything about this to the King's court.....
End