Thanks so much for all the reviews! Sorry it took me so long! I would have had this up sooner, but I got banned.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Her mind didn't wish to believe it, her heart did not wish to know it, but the emptiness in her very soul told her. She knew it before she received the call. She had hoped it was a nightmare until she had gotten the call. That wicked cruel cold call. He was, he was dead!
But she couldn't believe it, she wouldn't believe it! Her best friend, her own brother.
*He was to go out in a blaze of glory! Why, why, WHY! He didn't have a reason to kill himself!* she screamed silently.
But there would be no answer. Never would there be an answer, for the one she wanted one from was gone
"Leia! Leia, please let me in!" a voice pleaded outside the door.
She knew that voice, but it took a while for her mind to realize and accept it. But even then, she did not wish to see him, she wanted to be alone.
"Leia! Please let me in. I don't want you to be alone, not now. Please, honey, just let me in," the voice pleaded again.
"Go away, Han!" she ordered, trying to gather the last bit of her authority around her like a shield.
"I can't do that, Leia. Now, come on. Open up," Han said.
"Why?!" she screamed, her torn heart catching in her throat.
"Because I love you, and I am hurting as well. Please," he begged.
Outside, he leaned against the door; despair settling in his own heart. He had been too proud to beg at one point, but what had happened had torn through his proud façade. Even though he was not what they called Force sensitive, but in his heart he had always had a connection to the one he had called his best friend, his soul brother. He had felt it snap and hoped that it had not been what he feared. He had been about to go over and check when he got the ill-fated call. He had grown angry then, and in a fit of denial, had ripped the comm from its cords and thrown it into the nearby wall. About that time, oh, he had stormed from the place, intent on making sure. Until he had seen his wife rush into their apartment and lock herself in their bedroom. Oh, the denial had dispersed at the image of her tear stricken, pained look. The hope that it was wrong, that they had not found him there in his rooms, his blood soaking the floor, was gone, lost in such a horrible truth.
Guilt, pain, betrayal, sorrow, a maddening sense that something more was to this all had filled his mind, and most of the emotions were still there, swirling within him. But betrayal was the strongest. Why had he done it? He had no reason to. Why?
"Leia, please, darling," he pleaded one last time.
He needed to be there for her, both for her comfort, and his.
The door silently slid open. He pulled himself up in slight surprise, but the grief swallowed it quickly. He walked in to find her upon the bed, her hands covering her face. He moved to sit beside her upon the bed, and gently wrapped his arms around her, bringing her shivering form to lie against him. He was offering her his strength, and in turn, he hoped that it would make him forget his own sorrows, though he knew he couldn't, for nothing could wash away the grief in his soul.
"Oh, Han. Why did this happen? Why?" she whispered, burying her face in his shoulder.
He rubbed her back slowly, wondering how to answer her.
"I don't know, Leia. I truly don't know," he finally answered, knowing that her question mirrored the question in his soul.
"Oh, Han," she sobbed, and said no more, for she cried her heart out upon his shoulder.
He held her, and a few tears escaped his own heart, and he said not a word more himself, for the sorrow was far too great.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Her mind didn't wish to believe it, her heart did not wish to know it, but the emptiness in her very soul told her. She knew it before she received the call. She had hoped it was a nightmare until she had gotten the call. That wicked cruel cold call. He was, he was dead!
But she couldn't believe it, she wouldn't believe it! Her best friend, her own brother.
*He was to go out in a blaze of glory! Why, why, WHY! He didn't have a reason to kill himself!* she screamed silently.
But there would be no answer. Never would there be an answer, for the one she wanted one from was gone
"Leia! Leia, please let me in!" a voice pleaded outside the door.
She knew that voice, but it took a while for her mind to realize and accept it. But even then, she did not wish to see him, she wanted to be alone.
"Leia! Please let me in. I don't want you to be alone, not now. Please, honey, just let me in," the voice pleaded again.
"Go away, Han!" she ordered, trying to gather the last bit of her authority around her like a shield.
"I can't do that, Leia. Now, come on. Open up," Han said.
"Why?!" she screamed, her torn heart catching in her throat.
"Because I love you, and I am hurting as well. Please," he begged.
Outside, he leaned against the door; despair settling in his own heart. He had been too proud to beg at one point, but what had happened had torn through his proud façade. Even though he was not what they called Force sensitive, but in his heart he had always had a connection to the one he had called his best friend, his soul brother. He had felt it snap and hoped that it had not been what he feared. He had been about to go over and check when he got the ill-fated call. He had grown angry then, and in a fit of denial, had ripped the comm from its cords and thrown it into the nearby wall. About that time, oh, he had stormed from the place, intent on making sure. Until he had seen his wife rush into their apartment and lock herself in their bedroom. Oh, the denial had dispersed at the image of her tear stricken, pained look. The hope that it was wrong, that they had not found him there in his rooms, his blood soaking the floor, was gone, lost in such a horrible truth.
Guilt, pain, betrayal, sorrow, a maddening sense that something more was to this all had filled his mind, and most of the emotions were still there, swirling within him. But betrayal was the strongest. Why had he done it? He had no reason to. Why?
"Leia, please, darling," he pleaded one last time.
He needed to be there for her, both for her comfort, and his.
The door silently slid open. He pulled himself up in slight surprise, but the grief swallowed it quickly. He walked in to find her upon the bed, her hands covering her face. He moved to sit beside her upon the bed, and gently wrapped his arms around her, bringing her shivering form to lie against him. He was offering her his strength, and in turn, he hoped that it would make him forget his own sorrows, though he knew he couldn't, for nothing could wash away the grief in his soul.
"Oh, Han. Why did this happen? Why?" she whispered, burying her face in his shoulder.
He rubbed her back slowly, wondering how to answer her.
"I don't know, Leia. I truly don't know," he finally answered, knowing that her question mirrored the question in his soul.
"Oh, Han," she sobbed, and said no more, for she cried her heart out upon his shoulder.
He held her, and a few tears escaped his own heart, and he said not a word more himself, for the sorrow was far too great.