Disclaimer: Don't own it.
A/N: Once again, sorry this took so long. I am not very good about posting, am I? I probably wouldn't have even gotten around to writing this today except that I am snowed in and can't go to Geoffrey's house. :`( I think God is trying to punish me. He waits until we have a day off school for a long weekend and THEN the skies open up and we can hardly walk out the door there is so much snow.
Middle of Nowhere, 25 December, 3018, Night
We left Rivendell today and I had the worst day of my life thus far. Although we definitely stayed in Rivendell for much too long, I miss having a nice bed and lots of food. Our company includes Frodo Baggins, Samwise Gamgee, Gandalf, Strider (who is actually Aragorn son of Arathorn), Boromir son of Denethor (of Gondor), Legolas of the Woodland Realm, and Gimli son of Gloin. Quite a mouthful. What names! And then there's me and Merry. We marched all day today without stopping for meals. I have a blister on my foot and seven mosquito bites. Gandalf called me a "Fool of a Took" again. Boromir keeps calling Frodo, Sam, Merry and I "Little Ones." Don't particularly like Boromir as being patted on the head is very degrading. And he can't tell me apart from Merry. Legolas and Gimli argued all day long, nonstop. Legolas acts very superior and Gimli is rather loud and ill-tempered. Merry put pepper in my pipe. Pernicious, eye-offending clotpole. It's a wonder I put up with him at all. Maybe joining this stupid "Fellowship" wasn't such a good idea after all. I am thinking of sticking pepper in Boromir's water canteen.
Peregrin Took
Middle of Nowhere, 27 December, 3018, Night
Strider caught Pippin putting pepper in Boromir's water canteen this morning. Boromir is mad at Pippin. Gandalf is mad at Pippin. Sam is mad at Pippin. Strider is mad at Pippin. That leaves just Frodo and I to be his friends. And Legolas and Gimli, who are too busy being mad at each other to be mad at Pippin. I was feeling rather sorry for Pippin until he found an apple tree and threw an apple at me and hit me in the head. I have a large bump on my head now. He insists it's not his fault that I can't catch. Knavish, lily-livered malignancy! It's a wonder I put up with him at all.
Meriadoc Brandybuck
Middle of Nowhere, 30 December, 3018, Night
I had a nice little chat with Boromir today while we were marching. He told me all about Gondor, the country he is from, his father and his brother Faramir. Once you get him going he's actually quite a talker. Apparently his father's name is Denethor and he is the Steward of Gondor. Faramir is a Captain and everyone loves him to death except for Denethor because nothing is ever good enough for Denethor. Denethor sounds slightly mental to me. So I started telling Boromir about the Shire and me and Merry's long and fruitful career as mischief-makers. Boromir spent most of his childhood learning about history and sword-fighting and geography and doing whatever his father told him to! He has never set off a stolen firework, pushed anyone into a river, crashed a cart into a tree when racing on a closed off road, stolen vegetables, dipped a girl's hair in ink, stolen a wine cellar key, fed someone raw pepper or dumped popcorn all over his best friend and his best friend's date at a play! In fact he has never been to a play and doesn't even have a best friend besides his brother. Poor Boromir. No wonder he turned out like he did. I have decided to forgive him for patting me on the head and calling me "little one." I explained to him how to tell the difference between Merry and I. (I am handsome and Merry is ugly.) Unfortunately Merry is still being sore about getting hit on the head with an apple and isn't speaking to me. Haughty, eye-offending rampallion. It's a wonder I put up with him at all.
Peregrin Took
In some forest, 31 December, 3018, Middle of the Night
There was a slight catastrophe tonight because Aragorn suggested that we needed a night watch and we should all take turns. The first problem came up when it was decided that the hobbits, especially Frodo, shouldn't have watch alone. The obvious thing to do was pair up Frodo with Sam and Pippin with me. But when Gandalf found out that Pippin and I planned to be night watch together he muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "It would be safer to invite all the orcs in Mordor to tea." So I got landed with Legolas and Gandalf himself is partnered with Pippin. Pippin isn't pleased. Frodo and Sam get to be night watch together. No fair. Anyway, that's what I am doing now, sitting watch with Legolas and I can hardly see because the fire is so small. We only have a little while until we get to wake up Strider. It is very difficult to have a conversation with Legolas. I tried to start one about two hours ago by asking where he was from. He told me he was from "a forest far away from here where the leaves of the ancient trees are so thick, the sun can scarcely shine through…" I suggested that he might have been a poet instead of a warrior. Legolas gave me a poisonous look. Rather touchy he is. Silence for a while, while Legolas sulked. I broke the silence by asking him how he kept his hair so perfectly straight. He asked me if I had ever heard of a "lovely little invention called the hairbrush." I shut up for a while, but I kept thinking that I have never once seen Legolas brush his hair and I doubt he even brought a brush with him. I decided that it must be some Elvish magic that keeps his hair like that. I finally got him talking when I asked him what kind of tree we were sitting under. He gave me a detailed and rather poetic description of each and every tree in sight and was about to start on the flowers when I changed the subject by asking him what elves do for fun. Apparently they like making up songs, drinking wine, archery, and girls. I told him hobbits preferred ale but also like songs and girls. I also gave him a nice history of pipe weed (which he listened to very politely before telling me that elves don't smoke) and told him some of me and Pippin's past adventures driving people crazy and he looked like he was trying very hard not to laugh. He told me that elves have a holiday called Sheelala in early spring and they play a lot of practical jokes on that day. He once put pepper in his father's wine on this day. Pippin would get along wonderfully with Legolas. Earlier today he put pepper in my hair. Peevish, onion-eyed snipe. It's a wonder I put up with him at all. At least that was the last of his pepper. Right now I am writing and he is standing a little ways of humming a very strange tune, looking off into the distance. Legolas is very queer. At least he has a better voice than Strider. Speaking of, it's time to wake up Strider. Maybe we can pour water on his head…
Meriadoc Brandybuck
Middle of Nowhere, 1 January, 3019, Before Dawn
I got stuck doing night watch with Gandalf. What a way to spend New Year's Eve. Why do I have such terrible luck? Merry says he doesn't blame Gandalf for wanting to keep an eye on me. Jaded, muddy-mettled dogfish. It's a wonder I put up with him at all. Anyway, when Gandalf woke me up it was still dark and I still have to sit with him until it's time to wake everyone else up. Spent most of the night watch sitting next to Gandalf in silence. I realized that when you go on an expedition with a company of men, there is an awful lot of noise at night. Every single one of us snores except for Legolas, Frodo, and surprisingly, The Great Long-Legged One. I suppose you have to learn to sleep quietly if you're a Ranger so that your enemies won't creep up on you when you are sleeping in the wilderness. There was only one small catastrophe tonight, when I thought I heard an orc and I jumped up and took out my dagger only to find it was a rabbit. Gandalf reprimanded me a bit for that, but other than that he has only called me a "fool of a Took" twice and he also taught me how to make a good paper airplane (with a page from this book) and how to blow a proper smoke ring. Maybe Gandalf isn't so bad after all. He snores too, though.
Peregrin Took
Middle of Nowhere, 3 January, 3019, Night
Another long march today. Pippin was socializing with Legolas and Boromir and left me all alone, some best friend he is. Prating, shrill-gorged scantling. It's a wonder I put up with him at all. Anyway, while the social butterfly was making the rounds (I swear he sees this whole thing as one big outing) I decided to bother Strider for a while. It wasn't a very interesting afternoon because Strider doesn't say much and when he does it usually goes right over my head. So after about an hour of unsuccessful prodding I finally thought to ask him how he knows Arwen.
"Old friends" my Aunt Lobelia.
Strider isn't a very good liar. I decided not to mention that I'd seen them kissing because this "blade that was broken and has been re-forged" is quite big and sharp. But I was lucky to think of it because it was the one thing that really whipped him into a verbal frenzy. I got to hear all about the shards of Narsil (finally figured out what those are- Narsil was the blade that was broken, shards of Narsil are the pieces, and the re-forged blade is Anduril. Sound confusing enough?) and Isildur and generally about the history of Gondor. I now know more than I ever wanted to know about all of these things. I was just a little bit relieved when Strider suddenly went into another one of his silent, brooding moods and suddenly became very tight lipped. I went off to talk to Frodo and Sam, but they were very full of gloom and doom and I started to get depressed. So that is why I spent the better part of the afternoon listening to Gimli rant and rave about how arrogant elves can be.
Meriadoc Brandybuck
Middle of Nowhere (for a change), 8 January, 3019, Night
This entry has to be short because The Great Long-Legged One has first watch tonight and I think he might be reading over my shoulder. Today Boromir tried to teach us to swordfight, so we returned the favor by teaching him and Strider some of our famous wresting moves. Hobbits aren't completely defenseless. Anyway, Saruman sent some ugly crows to spy on us so Gandalf has decided that we must climb a cold snowy mountain tomorrow as an alternate route. I can't stop thinking about my nice wooly mittens sitting in their drawer back home.
I have night watch with Gimli tonight. Now that should be interesting.
Peregrin Took
A/N: Please R&R!!!! I know it was a little weirder than usual. And I didn't make up Sheelala but it didn't come the most reliable of sources so feel free to correct me if you know more about it than I do.