Chapter 9: The Morning After
Author's Note: This chapter is absolutely NOT dedicated to the two banes of my existence: writers block and real life. When one wasn't plaguing me, the other was. I'm not a naturally angsty person, so it's difficult to write this and still make it believable. I hope I did OK.
Just out of curiosity, is anyone still reading this? It's been a while, I know (about a year, almost), and I'd like to know if I'm chattering to myself here.
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It was a strange awakening, feeling something pressed along the length of her back. Seona lay for a moment with her eyes closed, trying to recall what had happened the night before. She had grown edgy with the acting, putting on a cheerful face around her friends so that they wouldn't ask her what was wrong. They'd despise her if they knew, she was sure of it. So she had said she was going to bed early but had slipped down to the dungeons to vent in private. It had been an odd sort of release, sitting in the darkness with her head on her knees as she sobbed in anger and frustration, and she wasn't sure that it had made her feel any better.
Then Professor Snape had found her. Brought her into his rooms and made her tea. She had told him everything! She sat up with a start, looking around wildly. She was still in his sitting room, lying on the couch with a blanket over her. How considerate of him. But where was he? Would he tell anyone?
INo,/I an inner voice counselled. He had told her things about his own past as well, things that had been hinted at when she had cautiously questioned her friends about him, but things which didn't seem as evil as they made it seem. He was just like her, he'd shown her: someone who was led to believe they were doing the right thing and only realised later that it was the wrongest thing imaginable. He wouldn't tell anyone what she had said.
Now that she was over her panic, she could hear running water from the next room. A glance at the clock on the mantle showed her that it was still early, so she settled back to wait for him to emerge. It was quite a comfortable room, she noticed. Quite at odds with the stern and forbidding Potions Master. She couldn't help smiling slightly. Perhaps he had a reason for cultivating that image - it made a good shield.
The sound of a door opening startled her out of her musings and she turned to find the man himself emerging from the door set in the far wall. He was already dressed and was running his fingers through damp hair. He lips twitched into something approaching a smile as he saw her. "So, I was afraid I would have to wake you after all. You slept well? No dreams?"
She smiled gratefully at him, appreciating the way that he tried to find the information without asking so directly that it might upset her again. "Not that I recall," she replied. "I suppose that's a good sign. I tend to remember the bad ones." She shivered slightly. "Thank you for taking care of me last night," she added in a soft voice. She still wasn't sure exactly what she felt about that episode, but this wasn't the place or time to examine those memories either. "I appreciate your listening without judging."
"It would be rather a case of the pot calling the kettle black, don't you think?" was his amused rejoinder. "But I'm glad that I was able to help, so you are welcome. You are also going to be late, and your friends will wonder where you are. I do not think it would be... wise... for a search party to form and find you here."
She couldn't help chuckling softly as she rose and folded the blanket neatly at the end of the couch. "True." Her mood turned sombre again as she contemplated another day of pretending that nothing was wrong. She looked up at Snape cautiously, wondering if he would think it beneath him to play the role she wanted - no, needed - to ask of him. Timidly, she asked, "Might I come and see you in the evenings sometimes? When it gets too hard to pretend..." She trailed off, then added, "I promise I won't fall asleep on your couch again, if that helps."
His whole face softened. It wasn't a smile, as such, but a relaxing of all the lines and muscles that were normally held rigid. "I can't promise that I will always be here," he replied softly, "But if I am and you need to talk, then I am at your disposal." He paused for a moment, then added, "As is the couch, if you really need it."
He kept doing this, throwing her completely bland lines that nevertheless suggested that he was secretly laughing. She chuckled appreciatively. "Thank you, Professor," she said with a warm smile. "You've been a big help." She turned towards the door, knowing that she would have to move quickly and carefully if she was to return to her room unnoticed.
It was strange that she felt so much better this morning. Perhaps it had been talking about it, but more than that she felt it was because she knew there was at least one person here who understood and wasn't going to push her away for what she had been led into doing. A small smile on her lips, she closed the door quietly behind her and flitted along the silent corridors towards the Gryffindor tower.
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The next weeks passed quickly at Hogwarts. Seona played the role she needed by day, managing to convince everyone that she had dealt with whatever had happened to her and was getting on with her life.
Well, almost everyone. She often slipped out of the tower at night and sought Professor Snape out for a quiet talk. It wasn't always about what had happened to either of them - often they spoke about the work he had allowed her to help him with during their weekly meetings. It helped keep her mind off things, and it was oddly soothing to sit curled up in his armchair with a cup of tea while they debated the use of various components.
There had been one small change, however: Draco Malfoy now kept his distance and no longer sought her and her friends out to make trouble for them. This was fine by her, as she still harboured some considerable resentment against the blonde Slytherin, but it was still curious that he should avoid contact as much as he did. It was almost Christmas before she finally decided to broach the subject with Snape one Saturday afternoon.
"Professor, what did happen to Malfoy? I know you said something about him being punished, but he won't come anywhere near me now. Not that I have a problem with that mind you, but..." She looked up at him curiously.
Snape's eyes had hardened and the tightness along the line of his jaw betrayed the effort he made to keep his voice even as he replied, "Young Malfoy is, unfortunately, too young to be fully punished for what he did. While he is at school, he is regarded as a child still and therefore is not allowed to be sent to Azkaban." Seeing her confused expression, he clarified, "The high security wizarding prison here in Britain. It is guarded by Dementors."
She shuddered. She had read about those strange creatures, and the thought of being sent to stay in a place containing many of them was truly horrifying. Still, "I wish Malfoy has waited until the end of next year," she said with passion.
"You aren't the only one." His voice was slightly bitter as he added, "Add to that the fact that his father is rather influential... He is, however, being investigated. Draco refused to say where he had learned to perform one of the Unforgivable Curses, but there is considerable speculation by certain departments in the Ministry. Those that Lucius doesn't have in his pocket, anyway."
"Ah, the joy of being a rich bugger," she said, voice heavy wit irony. Snape snorted as he returned to his work.
"Draco Malfoy had been punished as well as we are able to here," he told her quietly. "The public knowledge is that he was given two weeks detention for casting a harmful curse on a fellow student. It has been unspecified what that was, and given the private punishments that he has been forced to deal with it is likely that he would prefer the whole matter to fade from student memory. I would guess that would be to your mutual benefit."
Seona shrugged. "True. I'd still like to strangle the little..." She bit off the end of that sentence, abruptly remembering that for all their good working relationship, she was still addressing a teacher. One that she had considerable respect for, at that. He snorted again, however, and a slight twitch at the corners of his lips suggested that he knew exactly the sentiment she was on the verge of expressing. Hiding her own smile, she returned to her own tasks. With any luck, they would have enough preparation done to make an initial trial of the brew after the Christmas break.
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REVIEWERS TRIBUTE: (just in case any of you are still going to read this)
Many thanks to the following people who let me know they liked the last chapter:
LadyMoon
Skyfire - Well, hope you're as happy with this as you were with the last, even if it did take me an awful lot longer to write. :) Did you ever get any feedback from your friend?
DragonRider Mage - I wrote the last chapter before I had read the 4th book, so while I knew of some things (like the existence of that curse) but not the full story. I have tried to remedy that. Hope it worked.
Little Miss Insane - *grin* Oh, I am indeed. Glad you liked it enough to be speechless.
Zephyrel - Thanks. I'm trying hard to keep him in character, but it isn't always easy.
Martian Aries
Outcast125 - Well, it may not have been soon, but I got there eventually.
Memnet - Thanks. :)
Author's Note: This chapter is absolutely NOT dedicated to the two banes of my existence: writers block and real life. When one wasn't plaguing me, the other was. I'm not a naturally angsty person, so it's difficult to write this and still make it believable. I hope I did OK.
Just out of curiosity, is anyone still reading this? It's been a while, I know (about a year, almost), and I'd like to know if I'm chattering to myself here.
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It was a strange awakening, feeling something pressed along the length of her back. Seona lay for a moment with her eyes closed, trying to recall what had happened the night before. She had grown edgy with the acting, putting on a cheerful face around her friends so that they wouldn't ask her what was wrong. They'd despise her if they knew, she was sure of it. So she had said she was going to bed early but had slipped down to the dungeons to vent in private. It had been an odd sort of release, sitting in the darkness with her head on her knees as she sobbed in anger and frustration, and she wasn't sure that it had made her feel any better.
Then Professor Snape had found her. Brought her into his rooms and made her tea. She had told him everything! She sat up with a start, looking around wildly. She was still in his sitting room, lying on the couch with a blanket over her. How considerate of him. But where was he? Would he tell anyone?
INo,/I an inner voice counselled. He had told her things about his own past as well, things that had been hinted at when she had cautiously questioned her friends about him, but things which didn't seem as evil as they made it seem. He was just like her, he'd shown her: someone who was led to believe they were doing the right thing and only realised later that it was the wrongest thing imaginable. He wouldn't tell anyone what she had said.
Now that she was over her panic, she could hear running water from the next room. A glance at the clock on the mantle showed her that it was still early, so she settled back to wait for him to emerge. It was quite a comfortable room, she noticed. Quite at odds with the stern and forbidding Potions Master. She couldn't help smiling slightly. Perhaps he had a reason for cultivating that image - it made a good shield.
The sound of a door opening startled her out of her musings and she turned to find the man himself emerging from the door set in the far wall. He was already dressed and was running his fingers through damp hair. He lips twitched into something approaching a smile as he saw her. "So, I was afraid I would have to wake you after all. You slept well? No dreams?"
She smiled gratefully at him, appreciating the way that he tried to find the information without asking so directly that it might upset her again. "Not that I recall," she replied. "I suppose that's a good sign. I tend to remember the bad ones." She shivered slightly. "Thank you for taking care of me last night," she added in a soft voice. She still wasn't sure exactly what she felt about that episode, but this wasn't the place or time to examine those memories either. "I appreciate your listening without judging."
"It would be rather a case of the pot calling the kettle black, don't you think?" was his amused rejoinder. "But I'm glad that I was able to help, so you are welcome. You are also going to be late, and your friends will wonder where you are. I do not think it would be... wise... for a search party to form and find you here."
She couldn't help chuckling softly as she rose and folded the blanket neatly at the end of the couch. "True." Her mood turned sombre again as she contemplated another day of pretending that nothing was wrong. She looked up at Snape cautiously, wondering if he would think it beneath him to play the role she wanted - no, needed - to ask of him. Timidly, she asked, "Might I come and see you in the evenings sometimes? When it gets too hard to pretend..." She trailed off, then added, "I promise I won't fall asleep on your couch again, if that helps."
His whole face softened. It wasn't a smile, as such, but a relaxing of all the lines and muscles that were normally held rigid. "I can't promise that I will always be here," he replied softly, "But if I am and you need to talk, then I am at your disposal." He paused for a moment, then added, "As is the couch, if you really need it."
He kept doing this, throwing her completely bland lines that nevertheless suggested that he was secretly laughing. She chuckled appreciatively. "Thank you, Professor," she said with a warm smile. "You've been a big help." She turned towards the door, knowing that she would have to move quickly and carefully if she was to return to her room unnoticed.
It was strange that she felt so much better this morning. Perhaps it had been talking about it, but more than that she felt it was because she knew there was at least one person here who understood and wasn't going to push her away for what she had been led into doing. A small smile on her lips, she closed the door quietly behind her and flitted along the silent corridors towards the Gryffindor tower.
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The next weeks passed quickly at Hogwarts. Seona played the role she needed by day, managing to convince everyone that she had dealt with whatever had happened to her and was getting on with her life.
Well, almost everyone. She often slipped out of the tower at night and sought Professor Snape out for a quiet talk. It wasn't always about what had happened to either of them - often they spoke about the work he had allowed her to help him with during their weekly meetings. It helped keep her mind off things, and it was oddly soothing to sit curled up in his armchair with a cup of tea while they debated the use of various components.
There had been one small change, however: Draco Malfoy now kept his distance and no longer sought her and her friends out to make trouble for them. This was fine by her, as she still harboured some considerable resentment against the blonde Slytherin, but it was still curious that he should avoid contact as much as he did. It was almost Christmas before she finally decided to broach the subject with Snape one Saturday afternoon.
"Professor, what did happen to Malfoy? I know you said something about him being punished, but he won't come anywhere near me now. Not that I have a problem with that mind you, but..." She looked up at him curiously.
Snape's eyes had hardened and the tightness along the line of his jaw betrayed the effort he made to keep his voice even as he replied, "Young Malfoy is, unfortunately, too young to be fully punished for what he did. While he is at school, he is regarded as a child still and therefore is not allowed to be sent to Azkaban." Seeing her confused expression, he clarified, "The high security wizarding prison here in Britain. It is guarded by Dementors."
She shuddered. She had read about those strange creatures, and the thought of being sent to stay in a place containing many of them was truly horrifying. Still, "I wish Malfoy has waited until the end of next year," she said with passion.
"You aren't the only one." His voice was slightly bitter as he added, "Add to that the fact that his father is rather influential... He is, however, being investigated. Draco refused to say where he had learned to perform one of the Unforgivable Curses, but there is considerable speculation by certain departments in the Ministry. Those that Lucius doesn't have in his pocket, anyway."
"Ah, the joy of being a rich bugger," she said, voice heavy wit irony. Snape snorted as he returned to his work.
"Draco Malfoy had been punished as well as we are able to here," he told her quietly. "The public knowledge is that he was given two weeks detention for casting a harmful curse on a fellow student. It has been unspecified what that was, and given the private punishments that he has been forced to deal with it is likely that he would prefer the whole matter to fade from student memory. I would guess that would be to your mutual benefit."
Seona shrugged. "True. I'd still like to strangle the little..." She bit off the end of that sentence, abruptly remembering that for all their good working relationship, she was still addressing a teacher. One that she had considerable respect for, at that. He snorted again, however, and a slight twitch at the corners of his lips suggested that he knew exactly the sentiment she was on the verge of expressing. Hiding her own smile, she returned to her own tasks. With any luck, they would have enough preparation done to make an initial trial of the brew after the Christmas break.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
REVIEWERS TRIBUTE: (just in case any of you are still going to read this)
Many thanks to the following people who let me know they liked the last chapter:
LadyMoon
Skyfire - Well, hope you're as happy with this as you were with the last, even if it did take me an awful lot longer to write. :) Did you ever get any feedback from your friend?
DragonRider Mage - I wrote the last chapter before I had read the 4th book, so while I knew of some things (like the existence of that curse) but not the full story. I have tried to remedy that. Hope it worked.
Little Miss Insane - *grin* Oh, I am indeed. Glad you liked it enough to be speechless.
Zephyrel - Thanks. I'm trying hard to keep him in character, but it isn't always easy.
Martian Aries
Outcast125 - Well, it may not have been soon, but I got there eventually.
Memnet - Thanks. :)